Trans couple too afraid to go to Florida - how accepting is Disneyland?

Dug720

See the line where the sky meets the sea?
Joined
Feb 16, 2012
After a lot of pondering and wrestling, I made the call that felt right for me - and I had the privilege of being able to because of being outside of cancellation penalties. I cancelled the WDW and Disney Cruise trip I had and will book Disneyland once the refunds hit. The only thing I couldn't cancel was Epcot After Hours, and my friend said she'd take that off my hands - and since we're already linked on MDE I can reassign her the ticket.
 
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Luxurious_Lumiere

Mouseketeer
Joined
Oct 6, 2017
Don't believe the hype. The South gets a bad rap for intolerance, but the fact is 99.9999999999 percent of the time all you may get is a odd look if that(something you can get anywhere I imagine). Just because someone doesn't approve of your life choices doesn't mean they are going to pull out the torches and pitchforks when they see you. Go to Florida and have fun.
For many people, they can't simply bank on the chance that nothing bad will happen to them. If a trans person was, god forbid, injured in someway on vacation, or otherwise needed medical care for any reason, a Florida doctor can now refuse to treat them. If just one nut job sees a trans or gender non-conforming person enter a public restroom and disagrees with it, they bring down the law on said person. There are books being banned in Florida, and teachers being investigated in Florida, simply because ONE person complains. (Amanda Gorman's amazing poem "The Hill We Climb" was just banned in Miami-Dade country yesterday. Because of One person. It's insane!)

I personally have had much more than a dirty look during my travels in the south. I've even had confederate flags and insults hurled at me at Fort Wilderness! And when I was on a family trip to the panhandle a few years ago, I was absolutely horrified by the behavior I witnessed.

So sure, it's likely that folks won't experience any hate or violence if they travel to WDW, but Florida simply does NOT protect LGBTQ people right now. So if something does happen on your trip, you could wind up on the wrong side of the law or worse.
 
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kylenne

Wakandan-American
Joined
Oct 16, 2016
After a lot of pondering and wrestling, I made the call that felt right for me - and I had the privilege of bring able to being outside of cancellation penalties. I cancelled the WDW and Disney Cruise trip I had and will book Disneyland once the refunds hit. The only thing I couldn't cancel was Epcot After Hours, and my friend said she'd take that off my hands - and since we're already linked on MDE I can reassign her the ticket.
I support you 100%. These are tough calls to make and there really is no right or wrong answer for everyone. I’m glad you’re able to get refunded for most of it.
 

Anthony1971

DIS Veteran
Joined
Mar 11, 2005
So after some thought I will post something.
I am straight and I can not experience what another does as I simply do not walk in their shoes.
But I do ask some of my non straight friends I am closer with questions about some recent laws because I can....
For some reason some Gay men have been attracted to me. I met my wife of now almost 21 years through a gay man who tried to pick me up and he still likes me if that matters. My wife and I do have a number of gay friends ranging from years to neighbors to co workers- I know at least one of my coworkers would cross dress. And if it matters enough are Republican....
Other times I have been walking down streets in NYC ( I no longer live in NY and have not for 20 years) have had some very explicate sexual comments made towards me... didn't bother me one bit I have answers in a joking manner.
My point is I am confident in who I am and while yes you can say society helps with this, I will somewhat disagree as some people will freak out and others will have a good come back showing their confidence no matter what the situation.
Society as whole has an issue Left or Right with the vast majority being moderate can pick things from either side and say......... Until we have a head of this country that is a moderate no matter what you believe you can expect laws from both sides that can target something more specific. 99.??% of people simply don't care about a law that could... or persons preference in every shape or form and will treat all people as people. A Bill or law from either side, there are great ones from both side, will simply not change the 99.?? of people who already treat everyone as a person. Be who you are and be proud as society accepted or not can never fix that.....
 

Suz333

Mouseketeer
Joined
Mar 28, 2012
So after some thought I will post something.
I am straight and I can not experience what another does as I simply do not walk in their shoes.
But I do ask some of my non straight friends I am closer with questions about some recent laws because I can....
For some reason some Gay men have been attracted to me. I met my wife of now almost 21 years through a gay man who tried to pick me up and he still likes me if that matters. My wife and I do have a number of gay friends ranging from years to neighbors to co workers- I know at least one of my coworkers would cross dress. And if it matters enough are Republican....
Other times I have been walking down streets in NYC ( I no longer live in NY and have not for 20 years) have had some very explicate sexual comments made towards me... didn't bother me one bit I have answers in a joking manner.
My point is I am confident in who I am and while yes you can say society helps with this, I will somewhat disagree as some people will freak out and others will have a good come back showing their confidence no matter what the situation.
Society as whole has an issue Left or Right with the vast majority being moderate can pick things from either side and say......... Until we have a head of this country that is a moderate no matter what you believe you can expect laws from both sides that can target something more specific. 99.??% of people simply don't care about a law that could... or persons preference in every shape or form and will treat all people as people. A Bill or law from either side, there are great ones from both side, will simply not change the 99.?? of people who already treat everyone as a person. Be who you are and be proud as society accepted or not can never fix that.....

But here’s the thing, as a straight guy you are not familiar with the mental math some of us have to do. You aren’t wrong (I hope) when you say most people don’t care. You are wrong, though, if you think that means everyone can be safe going where they would like.

The medical law that will go into effect July 1 is vague enough to really be an issue. Yes, it doesn’t in and of itself create bigotry, but it allows bigotry too much breathing room. Now an employer can’t fire someone for refusing to treat someone. Hopefully the law will get thrown out in court and some people will get slapped down hard by the AMA but who wants to risk their health to be the test case?

Just this week I read a story about a woman who was misdiagnosed and had to go back to a different doctor. She had a really aggressive form of cancer and it was a miracle she survived as is. Had she only listened to the doctor who was say the biopsy could wait, she would have died. THAT situation was caused simply by a doctor thinking “well, it’s usually not a problem so the test can wait”. But now let’s let a bunch of yahoos just outright deny medical care?

My mental calculations lead me to believe that Florida isn’t safe for me and my wife right now. Even if I was okay to take the risk for myself, she doesn’t feel safe there. Her actual safety and her sense of safety are far more important than anything else. I’m not selling off the DVC contracts just yet, but our vacation planning is definitely being revised.
 

HerzerHerrick

Earning My Ears
Joined
Apr 19, 2023
For many people, they can't simply bank on the chance that nothing bad will happen to them. If a trans person was, god forbid, injured in someway on vacation, or otherwise needed medical care for any reason, a Florida doctor can now refuse to treat them. If just one nut job sees a trans or gender non-conforming person enter a public restroom and disagrees with it, they bring down the law on said person. There are books being banned in Florida, and teachers being investigated in Florida, simply because ONE person complains. (Amanda Gorman's amazing poem "The Hill We Climb" was just banned in Miami-Dade country yesterday. Because of One person. It's insane!)

I personally have had much more than a dirty look during my travels in the south. I've even had confederate flags and insults hurled at me at Fort Wilderness! And when I was on a family trip to the panhandle a few years ago, I was absolutely horrified by the behavior I witnessed.

So sure, it's likely that folks won't experience any hate or violence if they travel to WDW, but Florida simply does NOT protect LGBTQ people right now. So if something does happen on your trip, you could wind up on the wrong side of the law or worse.
Sure believe the hype, but I tell you it's sensationalized and not reality. Media(both sides of it) loves to spin things to make them sound more controversial or dramatic.
 

DizneyFamof4

DIS Veteran
Joined
Feb 7, 2020
Don't believe the hype. The South gets a bad rap for intolerance, but the fact is 99.9999999999 percent of the time all you may get is a odd look if that(something you can get anywhere I imagine). Just because someone doesn't approve of your life choices doesn't mean they are going to pull out the torches and pitchforks when they see you. Go to Florida and have fun.
This is definitely NOT a fact but just your opinion! I live in the west part of the Panhandle of Florida (very conservative) and I have witnessed the idiocy of "some" of the people here and it's more then just an odd look, it's also usually accompanied by some stupid verbal statement and the sad part is that it is not just limited to the LGBTQ:(
I am straight, so I really do not know what the LGBTQ+ go through and if you are not part of that group then the 100% fact is that you really have no clue what they encounter in the world either.
And the "bad Rap", yeah a lot of it is deserved.
OP; We have also lived a bunch of years in the Orlando area and it is definitely a LOT more of a diverse area and I really do not think you would have any issues being treated medically if needed.
 

P'colaBeachBum

FloGrown!
Joined
Dec 31, 2010
This is definitely NOT a fact but just your opinion! I live in the west part of the Panhandle of Florida (very conservative) and I have witnessed the idiocy of "some" of the people here and it's more then just an odd look, it's also usually accompanied by some stupid verbal statement and the sad part is that it is not just limited to the LGBTQ:(
I am straight, so I really do not know what the LGBTQ+ go through and if you are not part of that group then the 100% fact is that you really have no clue what they encounter in the world either.
And the "bad Rap", yeah a lot of it is deserved.
OP; We have also lived a bunch of years in the Orlando area and it is definitely a LOT more of a diverse area and I really do not think you would have any issues being treated medically if needed.
Your post surprised me. I’m from that area you live in and even though I have not been back in awhile still surprised. 40+ years ago that area was gay friendly. There were multiple bars in town and one on the beach. I guess the demographics have drastically changed since I moved.
Edit: Have fun where ever you go. Be happy and be safe.
 
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HerzerHerrick

Earning My Ears
Joined
Apr 19, 2023
This is definitely NOT a fact but just your opinion! I live in the west part of the Panhandle of Florida (very conservative) and I have witnessed the idiocy of "some" of the people here and it's more then just an odd look, it's also usually accompanied by some stupid verbal statement and the sad part is that it is not just limited to the LGBTQ:(
I am straight, so I really do not know what the LGBTQ+ go through and if you are not part of that group then the 100% fact is that you really have no clue what they encounter in the world either.
And the "bad Rap", yeah a lot of it is deserved.
OP; We have also lived a bunch of years in the Orlando area and it is definitely a LOT more of a diverse area and I really do not think you would have any issues being treated medically if needed.
Which is also your opinion. A few idiots does not a whole region make.
 

Ursula J

Mouseketeer
Joined
Sep 23, 2020
After a lot of pondering and wrestling, I made the call that felt right for me - and I had the privilege of being able to because of being outside of cancellation penalties. I cancelled the WDW and Disney Cruise trip I had and will book Disneyland once the refunds hit. The only thing I couldn't cancel was Epcot After Hours, and my friend said she'd take that off my hands - and since we're already linked on MDE I can reassign her the ticket.
I totally understand. I wish things weren't this way. As a mom, I'm the Chief Worrier of my family. I would never take anyone to-- or ask anyone to ignore the reality of--a place where medical care can be denied. If we hadn't pre-paid a nonrefundable DVC rental, we'd be canceling our trip on principle and heading to DL. Also wanted to say that if you'd ended up in WDW when we were there, I'd be happy to hang with you, and I do not suffer fools or bigots silently.
Be well, and we'll all keep working for a better tomorrow.
 

Dug720

See the line where the sky meets the sea?
Joined
Feb 16, 2012
I totally understand. I wish things weren't this way. As a mom, I'm the Chief Worrier of my family. I would never take anyone to-- or ask anyone to ignore the reality of--a place where medical care can be denied. If we hadn't pre-paid a nonrefundable DVC rental, we'd be canceling our trip on principle and heading to DL. Also wanted to say that if you'd ended up in WDW when we were there, I'd be happy to hang with you, and I do not suffer fools or bigots silently.
Be well, and we'll all keep working for a better tomorrow.

Thank you! If the cruise had actually been past final payment (which for a 3 or 4 night is 90 days) I would have gone and just hoped for the best.
Hugs!!
 

Judique

Dis Veteran, Beach Lover at BWV, BCV, HHI, VB
Joined
Aug 1, 2003
Thank you! If the cruise had actually been past final payment (which for a 3 or 4 night is 90 days) I would have gone and just hoped for the best.
Hugs!!

Enjoy your Disneyland visit!

I'm sorry that any of our Disboard members have to feel unease about freely visiting a state and an attraction that has long been a favorite because of recent unsettling actions.

We went for a short visit mid May and enjoyed ourselves. Not directly a part of your community but like to think that we respect all people, and that all people should have fundamental rights.

The message however is coming through loud and clear that not everybody feels the same about life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness for all.
 

DLgal

DIS Veteran
Joined
Feb 12, 2013
I also feel like maybe the original post was made to start an argument here since they never came back and it's their only post.

It doesn't really matter.

The post shared what are clearly some fears held by several people, and allowed a discussion to start around that, which I feel has been largely supportive of those fears.

Ignore the people who want to pretend this isn't "a thing." Ignore them like they want to ignore the existence of all those things they are so scared of.
 

biochemgirl

DIS Veteran
Joined
Oct 23, 2016
To the idea of "how accepting is Disneyland?" One of my more disturbing experiences happened when walking back to our hotel after a late night at Disneyland. We left the Toy Story parking lot and were on a busy road with only ambient city lighting when an older white male appearing person heckled me verbally with homophobic slurs while turning his body towards us and taking a step forward. It was unnerving and rattled me for some reason more than similar past events. My child, age 16 at the time, helped me keep walking and said some soothing words. Something about the juxtaposition of that event with the beautiful day we had just shared traumatized me, flashbacks and everything.

I'm not sharing to say that Disneyland or the surrounding area is less safe than Orlando, but to expand upon what has been shared in this thread - feeling unsafe can and does happen.

I've since been back to Disneyland and am going again for Pride Nite after hours. I also want to visit Hamburger Mary's this summer when I'm in Orlando this summer. "Towanda!"
 

moreisgood

Falling in love
Joined
Jan 7, 2013
I think maybe it's relevant here to say that from what I've seen, WDW has upped its representation in cast members. There were always boys in princess dresses and guests living their best lives, but the shift has gone to employees since Covid. I've gone to WDW many times since Covid, and I have seen many cast members presenting as non-binary and possibly even mixing gendered costume elements, which I know would have been strictly prohibited before Covid. I wish I had taken photos because now I'm thinking that was a big deal.

Another place this stood out was BBB. The godmothers are now "apprentices" and every kid chose a "title" of princess or queen or knight and a ton of others. Def more than one non-conforming cast member floating around at BBB, and that's a big one, IMO.

I mean, you're still in FL, but I have seen the shift in the Disney employees, which I am sure is an intentional shift for all of Disney. In the bubble, Disney is doing its own thing, that isn't matching the rest of FL.
All roles have two costume options and each castmember can choose the costume they prefer. They can’t change up the costume parts, but they can wear either costume each day. Pants or a skirt - whatever you prefer from day to day.
And BBB has great cast members, and all the apprentices can be comfortable with their look.
 
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