I will try to keep this brief to answer your question for those people who don't want to hear about my issues.
We still live together for financial reasons. The kids don't know we are going to get divorced yet. So, I am trying to keep the peace. She has always been a controlling person, she even admits it. I allowed it all these years so changing it now won't happen.
Having said that, I have been a stay-at-home dad for almost 7 years now. I have been having trouble finding a job because I have been out of work so long. So, I depend on her to be able to eat, sadly. I live in MA and in this state guys get screwed in divorce. I'll probably end up with limited visitation and paying child support even after being the primary caregiver for 7 years.
Then there is the kids of which I have 4. AgesL 10,6, 5, almost 3. The wife has shown some seriously unstable behavior lately. I won't give all the examples. The kids will hear all about how bad of a dad I am if I left without her approval, trust me. Dad abandonded you, etc... She struggles to take care of the kids for a couple hours by herself, nevermind 4 days. And before you say it, I have no idea how she'll do it after the divorce. I was cutting the grass one day and she texted me to come in an help her with the kids. I was outside for 45 MINUTES.
So, having her on the same page makes it so much easier. I LOVE Disney and I want to cross that finishline but the kids will always come first. If it means I am a pushover or a wimp, that's OK. The kids walk right by her and ask me what's for dinner because they know who takes care of them and that means WAY more than standing up for myself. My older kids think every dad in America cooks, cleans, does laundry, changes diapers, takes care of the kids when they are sick, irons, food shops, does the girls hair, etc... Not saying I am anything special but I know not many dads do ALL of that ALL the time.
If we were living apart and we had visitation then it would be a different story.
Hopefully that explains it.