touring the parks with PTSD

[TagsMissy]

I'm guessing he's doing it for his children even though it is hard for him. Children want to go to Disney and don't understand that Daddy is too sick.

Good luck OP! You may want to watch done YouTube videos of rides so you can avoid any that may have triggers. Like Philharmagic has corks popping really loudly that could set off someone.

As a military spouse as much as he wants to do this for the children, the children need to learn they can't always get what they want. Disney will always be there. Disney is not worth someone's mental state being in turmoil. I am sorry I need to be blunt in saying that. Perhaps right now Disney isn't the right thing to do. How about something more low key... if the Ops husband has had issues at smaller local parks I don't want to know how he'll handle WDW.

 

[Mama Who]

As a military spouse as much as he wants to do this for the children, the children need to learn they can't always get what they want. Disney will always be there. Disney is not worth someone's mental state being in turmoil. I am sorry I need to be blunt in saying that. Perhaps right now Disney isn't the right thing to do. How about something more low key... if the Ops husband has had issues at smaller local parks I don't want to know how he'll handle WDW.

This is worth considering. Sometimes the best thing for the kids is to learn that a parent has limits and how to act with compassion. I have a friend, who after two tours overseas cannot handle a theme park- after having a breakdown in the local mall in front of his kids he realized that pushing himself "for the kids" can sometimes backfire. He is learning to tell the kids that some things just aren't okay for him. In some cases a person can get past their PTSD but there should be no shame in recognizing the fact that one can't yet either.

 

[beaucoup]

Military wives job is to block the things that stress him out. Like blocking all the friends & family who want to visit while they are home on R&R instead of letting them relax for the 2 wks.

Same goes here. Wife needs to say "sorry honey, its best that we go somewhere quiet so you can chill". Make the decision. And take action & control.

You have to be his advocate right now. WDW will not help at all. Is it worth setting him back or making him even worse to the point of not being able to work, maybe ever?

Would not be worth it in this house.

People WITHOUT PTSD get stressed out & have melt downs, crying, streaming, fighting at WDW because its overload. How on earth is he going to handle all that WITH PTSD? That is not a vacation for a guy who really needs one & deserves one.

My husband said after being away for a year, the last thing he wanted to do was actually go away on vacation. He was tired of not sleeping in his own bed. Not having a closet & drawers. Not having a routine. Etc. Unless you've lived it, you might not think of it, but it made sense. He just wanted to stay home & get back to normal & stop the moving around & changing locations.

Mine still gets upset about things I wouldn't even think of. Recently watched Zero Dark Thirty. Said he would be fine with the subject matter. And he was, but what annoyed him enough to the point of yelling at the TV was any time he heard the local music / chanting that the locals of Aghanistan do. He said that drove him crazy while there & having to hear it every day over loud speakers.

 

[Gracie09]

I'm going to say this as nicely as possible, are you sure this is the right time for this trip? You have a baby with healing skin grafts, a husband dealing with PTSD. Either one of these would be cause to postpone a trip. Even on its emptiest day Disney is crowded and if your husband has an issue at the back of a park it's a long way out through crowds. Maybe it's worth waiting a year to give everyone time to heal.
I took a trip with dd and dh after dh three out his back (bulging disk). Looking back I don't know how I survived with a husband who could barely walk, a dd who couldn't and no sleep, because dh was tossing and turning in pain and dd was not happy in the strange place. There were lots of tears that trip and not all were dd.

 

[SCmom3]

I'm going to say this as nicely as possible, are you sure this is the right time for this trip? You have a baby with healing skin grafts, a husband dealing with PTSD. Either one of these would be cause to postpone a trip. Even on its emptiest day Disney is crowded and if your husband has an issue at the back of a park it's a long way out through crowds. Maybe it's worth waiting a year to give everyone time to heal.
I took a trip with dd and dh after dh three out his back (bulging disk). Looking back I don't know how I survived with a husband who could barely walk, a dd who couldn't and no sleep, because dh was tossing and turning in pain and dd was not happy in the strange place. There were lots of tears that trip and not all were dd.

Thank you for what I will assume is a well intended bit of advice. My OP did not, however, ask if this was a good time to take a trip. I am simply looking for advice, preferably from those with some first hand experience with PTSD. My husband and son are both in excellent health and physical condition. PTSD is not something that will 'heal' with time. As for my son, his doctor is a better judge of his ability to go on a vacation and cleared him for this trip months ago.

 

[clm10308]

My a,tear native suggestion would be to go to the parks at a time when they are open very late a night. One year we happened to be at MK when it was open until 3am. It was very crowded until the last fire works were over, but from 11:30pm until we left, the crowds were very lite. We were a le to get in rides that would normally taken 2-3 day visit. We e en rode the Astro Orbiter with a 5 min wait. In all our previous trips we have never ridden this ride because the wait was not worth it.
This might not be the best idea with a baby, but then you don't have to worry about sun exposure. Days could be spent sleeping late and hanging out in less crowded locations.

 

[Schmeck]

My husband has PTSD. Enclosed spaces full of people are a problem for him. I already know that the stretching room at HM is out of the question. Is it possible to bypass that? We plan to use FP to avoid the queues and the inevitable personal space invasion. Is there anything else I am missing? A day at the zoo can be very stressful for him and I do not want our vacation to be a miserable experience.

Even the FP queues can be crowded, as they pass parallel to the standby. They can also have a 5-10 minute wait - they are definitely not a 'walk right up to the ride vehicle' situation. WDW doesn't have any access like that, except for MAW children. Sometimes even MAW children have to wait, for an accessible vehicle, etc.

There will be crowds at the entrance to the parks, especially at security. There will be crowds at the turnstyles, food courts, bathrooms, table service restaurants (even with ADRs you have to wait a bit, in crowded areas), and at the exit of rides when they empty into a gift shop.

Shows have crowded waiting areas, and they ask people to go all the way in, and cram together. If there is any sort of performance anywhere in the park, a huge crowd will gather, blocking access across the area.

All of WDW is pretty much an invasion of personal space, because it is a very busy, public property.

Can your husband take anything to help him tune out a bit? If he's not driving, a good anti-anxiety med should help?

 

[KPeveler]

I understand. I wouldn't handle it well either. And adding in three kids and two strollers to worry about, plus DD and I get carsick. Oh dear, I'd rather walk to the parking lot and get in a hot minivan.

When getting from the MK parking lot, you will have to take either the boat or hte monorail - take the BOAT! The monorail is sometimes more packed than the buses can be, and you cannot open windows or anything - it is VERY tight in there.

There are trams from the parking lots that you pretty much have to take - not only are some parking lots a LONG way from the park entrances, but there is no real "walkway" from the parking to the parks - the strollers have to be folded on the trams, so think ahead of time how you want to handle 3 kids and 2 strollers on a tram. It may even be easier (unless you have a disabled parking tag) to drop off most of the family and then one person go park. Before I had my handicapped parking tag, this is what my family did.

Some people have managed to get to park closer to the park entrance by asking a CM but this is not always available, so do not count on it.

 

[Gracie09]

Thank you for what I will assume is a well intended bit of advice. My OP did not, however, ask if this was a good time to take a trip. I am simply looking for advice, preferably from those with some first hand experience with PTSD. My husband and son are both in excellent health and physical condition. PTSD is not something that will 'heal' with time. As for my son, his doctor is a better judge of his ability to go on a vacation and cleared him for this trip months ago.

I'm sorry it's not the advice you want to hear but when you post on a public message board you get what you get. You have said your husban has issues with a zoo trip, Disney is a trip to the zoo times a thousand. Everywhere there are people. There is no such thing as an uncrowded area. As touch upon in a previous post even parking means crowds. Never mind situations like a sudden rain storm that mean everyone jets for shelter. Being crammed under an overhang with 50 of your closest friends in not fun. Then what happens if there is a ride breakdown while you are in line and your ten minute fastpass wait in now 90 minutes and people are getting closer. Shows will pack you in until there is no room between you an the person next to you (ie Disney junior at hs) even the waiting areas for shows you are told to fill in all available space. The alternative entrances and often no better. What will happen if you are on a ride and it breaks down. Or your at the very back of fantasy land and you dh decides its enough, you have about a 45 minute journey to your car. How does he react to fireworks or simulated gun fire? There are several shows that use both an some are right around the castle. I know people with PTSD and they may never be fully cured but they learn how to cope but it takes time and therapy.

 

[tinkerpea]

Thank you for what I will assume is a well intended bit of advice. My OP did not, however, ask if this was a good time to take a trip. I am simply looking for advice, preferably from those with some first hand experience with PTSD. My husband and son are both in excellent health and physical condition. PTSD is not something that will 'heal' with time. As for my son, his doctor is a better judge of his ability to go on a vacation and cleared him for this trip months ago.

I just wanted to say that I hope your trip goes as wonderfully as it possibly can, and I commend you for wanting to do this trip! I don't believe that you have posted that your DH is military so I won't assume that is why he has PTSD..........

Unfortunately people can be very negative and it can come across like they think your crazy and selfish for even wanting to do this trip!!

I think you have had some great advice about getting a GAC ( this will help amazingly) getting the boat from the parking lot,so that you can be in the open as much as possible instead of crammed into a monorail that could break down!

Getting to the parks as early as possible so you can get lots done before it gets too crowded and then either eat before leaving or go back and relax that way your out of the mid day sun!

I'm not sure if your staying on site or not if you are early EMH will be your best friend I have a son with autism & so we try and get away from crowds as much as we can!
In fact last trip we spent a lot of days by the pool after doing early emh and then went to the parks in the evening!

Remember if it gets too much for your DH let him stay back at the resort with maybe your youngest and you take the other kids back to the parks when I was younger and went with my parents my dad was very very sick on 2 of our trips so he stayed behind at the hotel while my mum took me to the parks we had a blast and he enjoyed the peace & quite!!

Anyways have the most magical trip and stay positive

 

[SCmom3]

I'm sorry it's not the advice you want to hear but when you post on a public message board you get what you get. You have said your husban has issues with a zoo trip, Disney is a trip to the zoo times a thousand. Everywhere there are people. There is no such thing as an uncrowded area. As touch upon in a previous post even parking means crowds. Never mind situations like a sudden rain storm that mean everyone jets for shelter. Being crammed under an overhang with 50 of your closest friends in not fun. Then what happens if there is a ride breakdown while you are in line and your ten minute fastpass wait in now 90 minutes and people are getting closer. Shows will pack you in until there is no room between you an the person next to you (ie Disney junior at hs) even the waiting areas for shows you are told to fill in all available space. The alternative entrances and often no better. What will happen if you are on a ride and it breaks down. Or your at the very back of fantasy land and you dh decides its enough, you have about a 45 minute journey to your car. How does he react to fireworks or simulated gun fire? There are several shows that use both an some are right around the castle. I know people with PTSD and they may never be fully cured but they learn how to cope but it takes time and therapy.

I find it rather disconserting that so many people have been so negative, as if my husband is not a grown adult, fully capable of deciding for himself if he would like to take this trip or not. I don't really understand the response that implies he is being pushed into this by anyone. I expected that when posting my question here in this section, that I'd get slightly more tactful responses. I've seen questions here about every kind of disability and most responses have been friendly and positive and generally by a poster with some sort of personal experience with a similar situation. Never before have I seen so many negative responders trying to conjure up reasons for someone to stay out of the parks. I stated that enclosed spaces packed with people are a problem. I did not state that he'd have a full on freak out rendering him unable to hold down a job. I did not state he had trouble with regular crowds, loud noises, fireworks, etc. I never stated or implied that his PTSD was new or military related. I simply asked about rides or attractions with features similar to the stretching room in the haunted mansion. Knowing to skip these parts ahead of time would simplify our touring plans. I'd never presume to tell someone that because they were in a wheelchair/overweight/allergic to foods/bipolar/asthmatic/etc that they should skip their vacation entirely. It's amazing how many PTSD experts are on here, though.
And to those who responded with their own experiences, thank you very much.

 

[ArwenMarie]

I will share my tips. I don't have PTSD, but I have something similar, with similar issues in some sense...

1. YouTube...Have your husband watch all of the rides on there first. Many show the queues as well.
2. Rope drop rope drop rope drop. Can't say that enough!
3. I don't know your budget, but one thing that helps me a lot is to stay within walking distance of the parks. For MK, I stay at the Contemporary. For Epcot and DHS, I stay over there. You could try Swan and Dolphin too. Just knowing I can WALK home helps so much.
4. A lot of the second-tier rides aren't crowded and are just as much fun.
5. Resort tour! You can spend a whole day just riding the monorail and visiting the resorts and eating and snacking. Super fun.
6. Enjoy your own resort as well. The resorts tend to be very calming and super fun.
7. Of course look into a GAC as well.
8. Remember you can always leave a line, either by walking back out or by taking the "chicken exit" right before you get on.
9. Renting a car can help as well so you aren't dependent on the buses. Doesn't help with MK, but see #10.
10. Even if you aren't staying at a walking-distance resort, remember you can always leave and go chill at a close-by resort if he is having a rough time. Ex: for MK, the Contemporary Resort Lobby is within walking distance. The first floor by Contempo Cafe is especially quiet and peaceful. Same for the Epcot/DHS resorts.
11. Pre rope-drop breakfasts are a great way to get into the park and acclimated before the crowds. Crystal Palace is a good one and Hollywood and Vine at DHS.
12. For me, I avoid the fireworks from close up. Just too crowded on exit. Scope out alternative viewing sites (for Wishes the 4th floor lobby deck at CR is a good one)
13. Remember you can always go to First Aid to lie down if he gets really bad.
14. Off season. Enough said!

Hope this helps! Not sure if this is what you wanted, but I hope this gives you some ideas.

For me, Disney was therapeutic. Perhaps it will be for your DH too!

 

[ArwenMarie]

Touring with someone who doesn't tolerate crowds well requires a different mindset. Four attractions in one day is a good day. Three is pretty ok. Six is a great day. When you start to think you might be getting near the end - call yourself done. There's a lot of humanity between you and the exit.

Yes to this! And the little things can be just as enjoyable and memorable.

 

[FortForever]

Xanax, lots of Xanax. And Ambien to sleep.

 

[LockShockBarrel]

No one is intentionally being negative. They're trying to give you the best advice possible which in this case, I agree that there may be a better time to go. You're asking how to avoid things that are frankly unavoidable. You can lessen them but you can never eliminate them.

What a lot of people who ask questions that get the "is this really the best decision" response seem to overlook is that while you (a general you) might think Disney is a great place to get away from issues or what have you. Go to Disney and it's magical and they do so much to help people with handicaps and issues. That's all true to a point. But the issues don't go away in the parks, and a lot of time they get way worse. I think to us who suggest postponing the trip, we just think when the option exists to go another time when there will be less triggers for the issues, why wouldn't you take it? We're saying "wait, don't go now because you'll have to fight to have a good time. Go another time when you can really truly focus on having fun"

 

[SueM in MN]

This is a reminder for posters and readers - copied from the thread titled "An open letter from SueM". That thread is located near the top of this board.

1. If you come here with a chip on your shoulder looking for the negative in people, you will probably find it and YOU will be contributing to the negative views of others.
2. If you assume that other people are honestly trying to help (and most are), you will find help.
3. When reading replies, keep in mind that seeing things in writing only gives part of the message the person was trying to convey. Something that sounds 'snarky' or rude when you read it, might sound very different in person, when you also have other clues to the meaning, like tone of voice and facial expression.
4. Remember that other people reading your message might not understand it the way that you meant it (see # 2).

If you post "I plan to go to WDW in August and I have xxxxxxxx. What should I do", you will get advice from
-people who have been to WDW with xxxxxxxx and would not go again as long as they have xxxxxxxx
-people who have not been to WDW with xxxxxxx, but have been in August and would not go again
-people who have never been to WDW, but had xxxxxxx, and can't imagine going
-people who have suggestions for dealing with xxxxxxx
-people who have suggestions for dealing with xxxxxxx at WDW

They are giving their opinions. If you don't like them, you don't have to follow them.

But, most are trying to help, not upset. So, take what is helpful to you and assume the other information was given with good intentions, even if you don't feel it was helpful or was what you wanted to hear.

 

[SueM in MN]

Many posters are probably making assumptions about PTSD related to military service because there has been a lot in the news about that or because they have PTSD related to that.

The reason for the PTSD may be important to think about for certain attractions (no one is expecting you to share that information), but in looking at attractions, you should look at what the attraction might include that old be a problem.
For example, one person I know of had PTSD related to working as a firefighter at the World Trade Center on 9/11
She was not expecting or prepared for scenes of the 9/11 site in The American Adventure in Epcot, which was very distressing to her.

An earlier poster suggested watching YouTube video, including the line.
In post 3 of the disABILITIES thread, there is a link o an interactive YouTube video tour of WDW. It could be very helpful because it actually does show at least part of the line and the boarding for each ride.

Since you have small children, concentrate on attractions that don't have height restrictions, since one or 2 of your children would be too short for them.

My husband has PTSD. Enclosed spaces full of people are a problem for him. I already know that the stretching room at HM is out of the question. Is it possible to bypass that? We plan to use FP to avoid the queues and the inevitable personal space invasion. Is there anything else I am missing? A day at the zoo can be very stressful for him and I do not want our vacation to be a miserable experience.

The most helpful 3 pieces of advice I can give would be:

1) You wrote that a day at the zoo can be very stressful to him.
What makes a day at the zoo very stressful?
My experiences at zoos haven't involved enclosed spaces full of people or invasion of personal space.
You may know those things are difficult for him from other situations, but there must be other things besides those that make a day at the zoo stressful.
So, think about what those thing might be because chances are that you will run into those same things at WDW.

2) What coping mechanisms or tools does he normally use to handle stress or help with his PTSD? How can he use those at WDW?
If he is working with a therapist, can the therapist help him to come up with some strategies?

3) Use a touring plan like www.touringplans.com or www.easywdw.com
Even if you don't follow the touring plan exactly, but knowing which park is the 'recommended' park for the day will help in ways that a Guest Assistance Card can't. GACs can only help in attractions, and may not actually be all that helpful for anxiety type issues.
Knowing which park and which part of that park to go to can help avoid crowds all over, in and out of attractions.

 

[stitchlovestink]

No one is intentionally being negative. They're trying to give you the best advice possible which in this case, I agree that there may be a better time to go. You're asking how to avoid things that are frankly unavoidable. You can lessen them but you can never eliminate them.

What a lot of people who ask questions that get the "is this really the best decision" response seem to overlook is that while you (a general you) might think Disney is a great place to get away from issues or what have you. Go to Disney and it's magical and they do so much to help people with handicaps and issues. That's all true to a point. But the issues don't go away in the parks, and a lot of time they get way worse. I think to us who suggest postponing the trip, we just think when the option exists to go another time when there will be less triggers for the issues, why wouldn't you take it? We're saying "wait, don't go now because you'll have to fight to have a good time. Go another time when you can really truly focus on having fun"

But the OP has already stated that this is when they need to take their trip. She did not ask should they take the trip. She did not ask should they postpone the trip. She asked for TIPS for the trip for this time of year. I think it is terribly rude when none of us know all of 'their business' to say they shouldn't go now. Who are any of us to suggest when/where/how someone else should travel when that piece of advice what never solicited??


What was asked for was this.... Helpful Suggestions Like These....

The reason for the PTSD may be important to think about for certain attractions (no one is expecting you to share that information), but in looking at attractions, you should look at what the attraction might include that old be a problem.
For example, one person I know of had PTSD related to working as a firefighter at the World Trade Center on 9/11
She was not expecting or prepared for scenes of the 9/11 site in The American Adventure in Epcot, which was very distressing to her.

An earlier poster suggested watching YouTube video, including the line.
In post 3 of the disABILITIES thread, there is a link o an interactive YouTube video tour of WDW. It could be very helpful because it actually does show at least part of the line and the boarding for each ride.

Since you have small children, concentrate on attractions that don't have height restrictions, since one or 2 of your children would be too short for them.

The most helpful 3 pieces of advice I can give would be:

1) You wrote that a day at the zoo can be very stressful to him.
What makes a day at the zoo very stressful?
My experiences at zoos haven't involved enclosed spaces full of people or invasion of personal space.
You may know those things are difficult for him from other situations, but there must be other things besides those that make a day at the zoo stressful.
So, think about what those thing might be because chances are that you will run into those same things at WDW.

2) What coping mechanisms or tools does he normally use to handle stress or help with his PTSD? How can he use those at WDW?
If he is working with a therapist, can the therapist help him to come up with some strategies?

3) Use a touring plan like www.touringplans.com or www.easywdw.com
Even if you don't follow the touring plan exactly, but knowing which park is the 'recommended' park for the day will help in ways that a Guest Assistance Card can't. GACs can only help in attractions, and may not actually be all that helpful for anxiety type issues.
Knowing which park and which part of that park to go to can help avoid crowds all over, in and out of attractions.

Those along with some of the other suggestions are what this poster requested...not whether or not to travel to WDW...

I find it rather disconserting that so many people have been so negative, as if my husband is not a grown adult, fully capable of deciding for himself if he would like to take this trip or not. I don't really understand the response that implies he is being pushed into this by anyone. I expected that when posting my question here in this section, that I'd get slightly more tactful responses. I've seen questions here about every kind of disability and most responses have been friendly and positive and generally by a poster with some sort of personal experience with a similar situation. Never before have I seen so many negative responders trying to conjure up reasons for someone to stay out of the parks. I stated that enclosed spaces packed with people are a problem. I did not state that he'd have a full on freak out rendering him unable to hold down a job. I did not state he had trouble with regular crowds, loud noises, fireworks, etc. I never stated or implied that his PTSD was new or military related. I simply asked about rides or attractions with features similar to the stretching room in the haunted mansion. Knowing to skip these parts ahead of time would simplify our touring plans. I'd never presume to tell someone that because they were in a wheelchair/overweight/allergic to foods/bipolar/asthmatic/etc that they should skip their vacation entirely. It's amazing how many PTSD experts are on here, though.
And to those who responded with their own experiences, thank you very much.

Welcome to the Dis! I sent my additional suggestions by PM since so many others seem to think you shouldn't go...Hope they help!

 

[KPeveler]

No one is trying to be negative. They are being honest that in their opinion going at a hot crowded time of year may not be the best.

Without disclosing the reasons behind the PTSD, what triggers specifically must he avoid? Because in June, crowds are literally everywhere, so just saying he needs to avoid crowds is not going to get you specific information.

If we know more about his specific triggers and coping methods, we may be able to give more info. I have/had PTSD (non military related), so for example, for a while certain ride restraints would freak me out.

With just general info about needing to avoid crowds, I an not surprised people suggested going another time of year. They really were trying to help, even if you could not implement their advice.

Hope this helps clear things up a bit.

 

[lost*in*cyberspace]

No one is trying to be negative. They are being honest that in their opinion going at a hot crowded time of year may not be the best.

Without disclosing the reasons behind the PTSD, what triggers specifically must he avoid? Because in June, crowds are literally everywhere, so just saying he needs to avoid crowds is not going to get you specific information.

If we know more about his specific triggers and coping methods, we may be able to give more info. I have/had PTSD (non military related), so for example, for a while certain ride restraints would freak me out.

With just general info about needing to avoid crowds, I an not surprised people suggested going another time of year. They really were trying to help, even if you could not implement their advice.

Hope this helps clear things up a bit.

Yes! People are just trying to help the OP. When you post asking for help on a public board, you are going to get answers you don't like. No need to take this advice. Discussion boards are not for everyone.