Thread killers unite!

[whgrn]

Pepper and Kitty, thank you soooo much. When I hit that send button, I prayed I hadn't done the wrong thing, and I prayed that someone out there would hear me. Your support means the world to me.

I know I've got to get these meds straightened out. It sort of hit all of a sudden that this was NOT OK. I mean, it was nice to actually feel emotions after all this time, but I think now it's getting out of hand. I've been down in that black hole too many times not to know the symptoms, but this time it snuck up on me when I wasn't looking. Too busy being happy and healthy I guess.

My Doctor told me that 99.9% of the things people see him about turn out to be treatable. I believe it...remember when my FIL had that mass in his lung? He is now 100% cancer free, so don't sweat it. I bet it turns out to be some sort of scar tissue, or possibly something related to weight loss etc....

I thought about the scar tissue idea. But I dont' think that would hurt, or grow so fast. I hope I'm in that 99.9%, but I never did have very good odds...

Life is generally good. Even though the lessons God gives us are hard at the time, we do come out the other end better people for it. You probably need this time in your life to help you cope with something later in life...or more probably to be better equipped to help someone else by your experience. But being the loving God that he is he always rewards us for it in the end.

Someone once told me when I was under an extreme amount of stress that when you are having hard times that you should rejoice because it means God thinks enough of you to give you a very important lesson....well it made me feel good anyway. Chin up...things will get better I promise, they always do.

I wish He didn't think quite so much of me.

As always I am here to lend an ear if you need it and won't get offended if you tell me where I can put my advice (for what it is worth we all know what opinions are like )

I wouldn't do that. After all, I ASKED for the advice. And I value all of your opinions.

Good article.

http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080317/NEWS05/803170322/1081/COL

Hmmmm, maybe I should take up golf?

 

[MagiKitty]

whgrn...You have GREAT odds. Positive thinking is so so important, especially right now. You have so many people here who care about you and are cheering you on!

 

[pepperw23]

We are here for you. And never EVER be worried about hitting that send button. I becha tomorrow you are going to have even more great words of wisdom to ponder. There are some awesome TK'rs. You guys were a great comfort to me when I was having my own issues...remember the bully? (the are friends now strangely enough) and my FIL illness? And we had just started with TK then.

Magikitty is right when she says think positive.

this always makes me smile:

 

[disney54us]

Whgrn, first off you need one. I am so sorry to here all that you are going through, I will try to go step by step.
I understand your fears, and even though I know you are a trained professional this is you, your dealing with and it is scary. That said, I remember one thing my doctor said many years ago, Cancer doesn't usually hurt. I get the fear of cancer had thyroid cancer 11 years ago, but it didn't hurt had no clue. So, back to what my DR. said I guess it's true in most cases.
Nobody wants to be ill or have cancer and when you have children I think we worry more please God don't take me from my kids. You did the right thing, moving the appointment up but that will not calm your fears. I understand not wanting to worry 'everyone' at the same time I think you need someone to get you through the weekend. Maybe BFF, I get not wanting our mom's worrying about us, I tend to do the same. Though she gets mad, I just think it's to hard for her to be worrying about her DD if there's no need. I do think your friend would help. If just to give your the reasurrance or hug you know not the 'virtual' ones we are sending.
I'm sorry about the depression issues and drugs, I agree with above post, maybe you don't have to go back on the two, it might be time to reevaluate and change. The body and chemical make up changes and they need to be monitored for that. I know your a Health care Prof. but again when we deal with ourselves and emotions and health, it's different. I don't know how long you were on these, but your body has changed with the weight loss and even with the foods that you put into your body, as you know that changes how med's work.
AS far as DS, give yourself credit, you admit he has ADD/orADHD you have provided him with counseling. So you will do what is needed for him. If he is not still going to counseling, I'm sure you will get him back. Again, as much as we want to think if we do it all right, it doesn't make a difference. What matters is he has a mom who realizes what is going on and is willing not to take it as acceptable and do something to help. I know that isn't much help when you are living with it. I also thing unfortunatley it is a sign of our times. You don't want to spoil your kids but do enjoy providing things and the balance at a certain age is for lack of a better word.

 

[disney54us]

I wish He didn't think quite so much of me.


I have said that many times, especially in the past 5 or so. Hey GF, I think the tag fairy needs to tag you on that one.

 

[blame my sister]

Whgrn ........BIG



I don't know what to say but I'm sorry and keep your spirits up.

I'm sur your freind would listen so I would tell them at least to get it off your chest cause for me that helps ALOT just talking about it.

Most of all.........................

Hang in there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[dreamin in pa]

whgrn-I am so sorry to hear all this. You are such a wonderful, kind, compassionate and helpful person to all of us here and I only hope that I can return just a little bit to you. Please know that anything we can do, we will even if it's only for us to listen to you vent.

Moving your doctor's appointment up was a very good move. You need to put your mind at ease with that as soon as possible. As hard as it may be right now, you need to try to think positive. You should try to stay pro-active instead of reactive. Whatever you find out, know that we will all be here for you.

As for your meds, I agree with the other that with your weight loss, maybe things have changed with the way the meds work now. You need to tell your doctor about all the changes. You may just need one entirely different med to regulate everything.

Your DS, well, what can I say except I really feel your pain. You all have read about the problems we have with our DS and I really wish I could offer you some advice on that. We don't know what to do with him but we just keep going on and trying to find something that will get through to him. If you ever need to vent or cry about what is going on with him, I'm here. PM me anytime, I'll be here to listen and understand how you feel. I've been there and I'm still there alot of the times.

I'll be keeping you in my prayers and yes, we will all worry about you.

 

[pepperw23]

Magikitti!!! Is that kitty kat in your siggy new tonight? Did you get another tag???

or maybe I just missed it last night?

 

[MagiKitty]

No I did! I did! I got another tag! I'm so happy!

I expressed jealousy at some other Disers who had this cute kitty tag stealing the red X (like when you can't see a banner). Tag Fairy found out and gave me a different one that I love love love!

My cat does that same dance on my tummy when he wants love.

whgrn...hope you're doing well today. You and your loved ones are in my thoughts...big hugs out to you!

 

[disney54us]

Good Morning all. Magikitty didn't notice the cat very cute! Wow seems once thetag fairy finds you, your set.
Whgrn, Thinking about you hope letting it out last night made you feel a little better. We're here for you.
Okay, DN's baby name change, back to Hope,but not Hope Morgan The original name she had picked was Hope Liberty, so she decided to stay with Hope, was having a hard time calling her Morgan after months of talking to her and calling her Hope. When she decided to go w/her original pick she went with what she had picked out. She knows most don't care for Liberty, but her and DH like it so they are sticking with it. Just glad she stayed with Hope.
With any luck the sun will stay out and it will warm up and later today we can start doing some yard work.
Really worried about magsnden not checking in after her NY weekend. I emailed her to check if all was well and no reply. It's just really strange, I know people leave threads and go on different forums or get busy, but she was very connected to TK and always would check in even if just to say she would catch up later.

 

[dreamin in pa]

Afternoon all. It's very sunny here today too but still very chilly. Hoping it warms up to send the kiddies out to play for a while. Finally caught the cold that's been going around though luckily it doesn't seem as bad as everyone else's.

Still no word from magnsden? Getting pretty worried now. It is not like her not to check in this long.

whgrn-still thinking about you. Keep hanging in there.

MagiKitty-another tag!!! ok, now you have to give the rest of us tips on how to get noticed by the tag fairie.

disney54us-Hope Liberty is very beautiful too. Very unique and who cares if your DN thinks nobody else really likes it. If her and her DH love it, that's all that matters. Best wishes to her.

Took DD out shopping last night for her trip. Found everything she needs except for a small first-aid kit. She even found a bag that she likes. It's not very big, certainly not big enough for a sweatshirt, but she said she would rather tie the sweatshirt around her waist. So, she is all set. Now she just has to decided what clothes she wants to take and that will probably take until the day before the trip. Thanks everyone for all the suggestions!!!!

 

[DL55]

whgrn Hope you are feeling a little bit better today. on upping the Dr appt.
My DH treats me like s*** but apparently treats others (non family) better so something may have sunk in. Maybe DS acts better in public?

 

[disney54us]

Afternoon all. It's very sunny here today too but still very chilly. Hoping it warms up to send the kiddies out to play for a while. Finally caught the cold that's been going around though luckily it doesn't seem as bad as everyone else's.

Still no word from magnsden? Getting pretty worried now. It is not like her not to check in this long.

whgrn-still thinking about you. Keep hanging in there.

MagiKitty-another tag!!! ok, now you have to give the rest of us tips on how to get noticed by the tag fairie.

disney54us-Hope Liberty is very beautiful too. Very unique and who cares if your DN thinks nobody else really likes it. If her and her DH love it, that's all that matters. Best wishes to her.

Took DD out shopping last night for her trip. Found everything she needs except for a small first-aid kit. She even found a bag that she likes. It's not very big, certainly not big enough for a sweatshirt, but she said she would rather tie the sweatshirt around her waist. So, she is all set. Now she just has to decided what clothes she wants to take and that will probably take until the day before the trip. Thanks everyone for all the suggestions!!!!

Hope Liberty, it's growing, we are all so use to it now that it doesn't seem so, well why are you naming her Liberty?
I know really worried about magsnden, been thinking wasn't it her father that was ill around the holidays? Somewhere between Thanksgiving and Christmas. Hope nothing happened
Yeah, she's set! When does she leave, how long, and where are they staying? Try Target for small first aid kit. REI carries them in assorted sizes as I'm sure Cabella's.
Hope you feel better, glad to hear you didn't get it as bad, of course being the mother God knows you need your energy!

whgrn Hope you are feeling a little bit better today. on upping the Dr appt.
My DH treats me like s*** but apparently treats others (non family) better so something may have sunk in. Maybe DS acts better in public?

for you. Cheer up you'll be in the land of magic soon, maybe that and a few golf games for DH will help.


Well seems like it has been quiet here today, we were hoping to get some yard work done, but though sunny didn't warm up till later. Instead we did a Ikea trip, it's been a while and I must say considering how long it's been we really didn't go as crazy as I thought.

 

[disney54us]

Okay question??? For all my computer knowledgeable friends, changed my avitar, I like this one (I live breath palm tree and beach) for some reason they made this one so small. Is there any way I can have this bigger????

 

[dreamin in pa]

whgrn Hope you are feeling a little bit better today. on upping the Dr appt.
My DH treats me like s*** but apparently treats others (non family) better so something may have sunk in. Maybe DS acts better in public?

to you. I hope you find time to relax and get away from it all on you upcomming vacation. And if you ever need to vent, we are all here for you.

disney54us-Yeah, I'm going to check Target for the first-aid kit. I think I found some last year for only a 1.00 or so. I bought a bunch last year but they got used and it's time to restock anyway. DD leaves the 3rd week of April and they get to stay for 6 days. They are staying at All-Star Movies which is nice since the last time we stayed there, the main pool was **** down. There is one chaperone per 4 students so it won't be like those huge tour group mobs that we read about on here. They have very strict rules....the chaperones will hold each students money, medicines, and key card. At the first meeting we had about this trip, they told us that last year, after lights out, they would put tape on the outside of the doors to make sure nobody snuck out. They are apparently coming up with another idea for this year.

I'm not sure about changing the size of the picture for you. I'll play around with it and see if I can figure it out.

 

[whgrn]

Hello dear friends.

I just want to start out by saying that you all are the BEST. Thank you all soooo much for being here for me last night when i needed you. I really was just feeling done in emotionally, and couldn't deal with it. But y'all were there to support and encourage me, as I knew you would, and it helped.

I am happy to say that today has been MUCH better. For starters, I finished my tearjerker novel last night before bed (sobbed through the ending). Then, after waking up at 8 to get DD up for Sylvan, I went back to bed until 10 of 9 when I had to take her. Came home and went back to bed again until time to pick her up at 11. THEN I got dressed, did my hair, etc. I had "brunch" about 12:30--I had NO appetite prior to that, and wasn't hungry. But I did make myself eat then, just a little something. Even had a snack later on.

BFF was here this afternoon and I told her everything. She thinks you guys rock too! She thinks the stomach thing is related to my multiple surgeries, which is probably right. I have decided to refuse to allow myself to think about the big C until and unless it becomes necessary, which it won't. I am going to assume that it is not a big deal, and will be taken care of. OK, might require another surgery, but I'll deal with that. We had a long talk about DS. When BFF arrived (this was all planned ahead, and the 3 other kids knew about it), she and I were BRUTAL to each other. Really really nasty. We talked just like DS talks, even using some of his words and phrases. it was HARD! I mean, being so hateful to someone I love dearly! We didn't last long, too strenuous! The 3 other kids were horrified, esp DD. But DS thought it was funny. I had quite a talk with him later, and he was very contrite and very teary. I think it finally sunk in. All I know is, he's been quite pleasant ever since!.

After BFF left, the kids and I went furniture shopping. DD gets a new bedroom set this summer (I promised both kids when they turn 13 I'll get rid of their baby furniture and get them something grown up). I thought it would take forever to find something she liked and I approved of. Nope. We were there less than 1/2 hour, and that included me giving all the contact info to the very helpful saleslady who will call me in July about ordering. But I think I may order in June, and arrange to have it come while DD is away at camp. I could have her room painted (she'll chose the paint) the day after she leaves, and then have the furniture delivered a few days later, before I leave for Scotland. Then she'd come home to her new room all put together! What do you think?

Anyway, DS was surprisingly well behaved during the trip, and he did get to check out some ideas for when he gets his new room. We've pretty much decided on a double bed with drawers underneath for storage, which will let me eliminate one of his 2 dressers. And there are quite a few choices that meet those parameters, so it won't be too hard. We hit the grocery store briefly and DD begged for organic ice cream pops, which I let her have, and DS wanted Matzoh, so I said sure, why not!? (I swear, this kid was born Jewish!!)

Made a late dinner--didn't eat much because again no appetite/hunger, but it was OK.

At 8, out went the lights for an hour (for the "Earth Hour") I did let the kids watch TV (kids choice awards were on...), and I didn't stop doing laundry--once I get started, I go tiil it's DONE!), but we did everything in the dark, which was sort of sureal!

Now they're in bed, I'm about to take out the last load, and I'm heading off to bed before too long. Just a lazy, peaceful, gentle day for me. I guess I needed it. It certainly helped. And the ex has them all day tomorrow, so I'll have peace even then!

No I did! I did! I got another tag! I'm so happy!

I expressed jealousy at some other Disers who had this cute kitty tag stealing the red X (like when you can't see a banner). Tag Fairy found out and gave me a different one that I love love love!

My cat does that same dance on my tummy when he wants love.

whgrn...hope you're doing well today. You and your loved ones are in my thoughts...big hugs out to you!

Thanks Kitty, and I LOVE your new tag, he's so cute!!!

Good Morning all. Magikitty didn't notice the cat very cute! Wow seems once thetag fairy finds you, your set.
Whgrn, Thinking about you hope letting it out last night made you feel a little better. We're here for you.
Okay, DN's baby name change, back to Hope,but not Hope Morgan The original name she had picked was Hope Liberty, so she decided to stay with Hope, was having a hard time calling her Morgan after months of talking to her and calling her Hope. When she decided to go w/her original pick she went with what she had picked out. She knows most don't care for Liberty, but her and DH like it so they are sticking with it. Just glad she stayed with Hope.
With any luck the sun will stay out and it will warm up and later today we can start doing some yard work.
Really worried about magsnden not checking in after her NY weekend. I emailed her to check if all was well and no reply. It's just really strange, I know people leave threads and go on different forums or get busy, but she was very connected to TK and always would check in even if just to say she would catch up later.

Hope Liberty. Hmmm, different. But I kinda like it! And hey, it's not like they are gonna run around calling "Hope Liberty, come here honey"!!! So really, it's a middle name, most people won't even know about it.

whgrn Hope you are feeling a little bit better today. on upping the Dr appt.
My DH treats me like s*** but apparently treats others (non family) better so something may have sunk in. Maybe DS acts better in public?

I'm so sorry DH treats you badly. You want we should smack him or something for you? Seriously thought, that's the pits. My ex was the same way.

DS IS better in public and at school, but sometimes it comes out. But he's never as horrible as he is at home with me and DD. This is also true of DD, and lots of kids, and I'd rather they were good outside of the house and bad here, but still, it really grates on you after awhile. BFF sent him a LONG email telling him how much she loves him, but how much it hurts her to see him treat me like that because after all I am her BFF! I doubt it will have much affect, but we'll see.

Well, killers, the last load is done, and so am I. Off to sleepy land for me!!!

Thanks again my friends. You all ROCK!!!!!

 

[Shmu]

So sorry to run in and out again.
Just wanted to leave all of you a bunch of hugs.

I will not be on the DIS for a while.
More info is on my PTR.
Just click on my siggie and on the first page look for ANNOUNCEMENT then click there.
Everything is fine. No need to worry.
Love you guys.

 

[dreamin in pa]

Just a quick stop in....been busy cleaning DD12 room and packing away all her "baby" stuff that she wants to keep but not necessarily keep out on display.

whgrn-I'm so glad things are looking up for you today. And I'm glad you told your BFF about what is going on. I hope you have gotten through to your DS. Sometimes just showing them what they really look like is what it takes. Kind of an extreme wake-up call. Let us know what happens on Monday....we are all here for you.

shmu-I'll say you're going to be busy. Good luck with all that is going on. And if you get a minute, just pop in and say hi.

 

[lighttech]

I wish I had more time, but its a bit of an off day here... Nothing major, but DS is tired, and I've finally succumbed to the cold he and DH had, and DH is trying to study for a test, so I'm in charge but in a very lazy state.
But, I wanted to at least check in... I haven't read everything, but I skimmed and read your posts WHGRN.

Hang in there kiddo! You are in a lot of thoughts and prayers from everyone here. Please do check in w/ you doc on both the meds and the tummy. Anti-depressants can be a serious mess, as I know you are aware. And, depression in general is nothing to be cavalier about. I'm glad you've decided to talk it out. Glad you pushed up your appt. to Monday, we'll all be thinking of you. That waiting part is SO scary. Somehow, I think especially as women, not knowing the facts can be so stressful. Its like rather than dealing w/ one outcome, we try and solve ALL possible outcomes while we wait. And, no one can do that.

As for DS, I'm glad you are trying some "creative parenting." Sometimes it takes something totally off the wall. And, I'm glad you told us, and talked to BFF. You shouldn't have to go this alone. It really does "take a village." We, as a culture, have gotten away from that. We try so hard to be independent. But, we need people.

We are always here for all the "virtual" help you need. Not to segregate our male members and visitors, but I'm so glad we've all found a group of women to commune w/ here. I don't have many female friends, and speaking to a group w/ like minds always helps. I get along well w/ men, and enjoy having them as friends, but I do find that when I really have a tough situation, its a huge help to have a GF to talk to.

So, HUGS to you WHGRN and we'll be thinking of you. Come here anytime you need.

And, thanks to everyone. We've really become a regular support group for all of our everyday and not-so-everyday worries and concerns, joys and sadness. I think this thread was really (and is) a blessing.

 

[lighttech]

So sorry to run in and out again.
Just wanted to leave all of you a bunch of hugs.

I will not be on the DIS for a while.
More info is on my PTR.
Just click on my siggie and on the first page look for ANNOUNCEMENT then click there.
Everything is fine. No need to worry.
Love you guys.

Shmu!!! (for a little while). Read your announcement and it all sounds very exciting. Thanks for letting us know and good luck w/ it all!