Thread killers unite!

[MagiKitty]

I just need to vent!!!

I went to the ATM to get money out for the weekend at my local bank. I was unable to withdraw funds. Puzzled, I went inside to the teller who then directed me to the bank's VP. She checked the account on the computer and told me that nothing was wrong. She then accompanied back outside to the ATM to see what was wrong. Unable to take money out, she assured me that there was something wrong with the ATM and I should try an ATM elsewhere.

So, risking $3 fee at a different ATM, I again attempted to take money out. No luck.

Went back to my bank and TRIED to speak to VP again. I was worried about my account. She just told me that "there was nothing more she could do for me". She didn't even try to look at the account again. I asked her what to do next, as it is Friday, and if there is something going on with my account, I'd like to settle it before Monday (who knows what was going on). The VP got downright hostile and rude, telling me there was nothing she could do. Well, if not her, then who? Isn't this my bank? Don't they have records or anything?

I admit it, I raised my voice. I just didn't understand why she wouldn't even attempt to try to address my account's issues. She didn't offer any possibilities of a problem with my ATM. Was it my account? My card? AtmS in the area? I left very very upset and wondering if my account would even exist my Monday.

Checked my phone messages and a message was left by the bank's headquarters to call them back about activity on the account. I spoke to a very kind representative who had placed a hold on the account b/c of suspicious ATM activity. I explained to her that it had been me, trying to get money over and over again. I asked if there was any other issues with the account, she said no, and that she would lift the hold. I told her about my experience at the bank, and she said that if the VP had bothered to check a second time, she would have seen the note about my account and had been able to give me the answers I wanted. I was assured that I would be able to use the ATM tomorrow. We'll see.

I just sent out a complaint letter to the bank's headquarters. I doubt that my email will generate a response, let alone an action, but just getting it out just makes me feel so much better. I can't believe how I was treated today. I think its time to look for another bank, b/c I do not want to have to deal with that woman again.

Thanks for letting me get it out. what a way to start the weekend!

 

[lighttech]

Dreamin'-

I use this bag (in a dark green) for my everyday bag. Its not big enough for a hoodie or anything, but it does fit a lot of stuff. Its got a nice place to put a cell phone, an organizer pocket for cards, zippered areas for money, and I can fit a diaper or two and some wipes, etc. inside as well as a few snacks and my wallet. This one is a little bigger, but travelon sells some smaller versions that I like b/c they are small enough I would feel comfortable leaving them on on rides instead of sitting them next to the ride and hoping they were there when I got back.

http://www.qvc.com/qic/qvcapp.aspx/view.2/app.detail/walk.yah.0104~2225

Used these for tickets/id etc in the airport and I loved it. (Mine was brown though, I'm not so into the hot pink and leopard print personally.)

http://www.qvc.com/qic/qvcapp.aspx/view.2/app.detail/walk.yah.0104~2225

Here's one from Target that might be good. Its listed under "luggage."
http://www.target.com/Mossimo-Numbe...?ie=UTF8&node=1121276&frombrowse=1&rh=&page=1

Cute backpack from Target w/ a place for your water bottle. (I know you weren't necessarily looking for backpacks though...)
http://www.target.com/Day-Trip-Back...?ie=UTF8&node=1042208&frombrowse=1&rh=&page=1

They have a whole series of those "string packs" too for $9.99
http://www.target.com/String-Pack-L...ox/601-5044389-7392937?ie=UTF8&node=359218011

Oh my!! Does anyone remember these books from when they were little? I LOVED them! (The bag probably wouldn't work for Disney, but I might have to get it for myself!)

http://www.target.com/Little-Miss-S...v&field-browse=1121276&rank=pmrank&rh=&page=2


OK, I'll stop now... Just having fun "shopping" on my lunch break...

 

[DL55]

MagiKitty vent all you want we're here (somewhere) Remember it's Friday.

 

[lighttech]

Magikitty - So sorry! No one deserves to be treated that way... especially when it is that VPs JOB!! I would find another bank if I were you too. Common courtesy is all too scarce these days.

 

[MagiKitty]

Thanks so much for humoring. Its very rare that I get upset enough to raise my voice to someone in service. But as VP, I would think she would know SOMETHING about customer service. And in this day, with all sorts of ID theft, you'd think she's show some concern too about my account.

I'm so upset I could spit. Or cry. I havne't decided yet. Thanks for listening.

 

[DL55]

MagiKittyTrouble with bank accounts is a serious worry.
I feel silly with my previous response, but at the time you just said "I just need to vent".

 

[MagiKitty]

DL55..please don't feel silly. Its entirely my fault. In my anger, I hit "enter" before I had time to actually vent!

 

[dreamin in pa]

Oh, MagiKitty that is just so horrible. I would be so PO'd if my bank did that. Did anyone give you an explanation why you couldn't even get money out the first time you tried? I can understand the lock on your account after you tried to get money a couple of times. But why not the first time? I don't think I would want to deal with a bank like that. They are suppose to be helping you not causing you grief and aggrevation.

Lighttech, thanks for shopping for me. I'll have DD check out those links when she gets home from school.

 

[MagiKitty]

Oh sorry about leaving that out...

My dad spends 2 months in the Philippines every year. He's there now and will be until late April. ATMs give the best exchange rate, so he has the other ATM card to the account. Apparently, he took money out this week, and the bank, seeing an international withdrawal, put a hold on the account until they could verify if it was an actual withdrawal. It was only after I tried to make a second withdrawal in the US that the bank called me. I don't know why this wasn't apparent when my account was "checked" at the bank today.

So, in actuality, I'm glad there was a hold on the account, the bank is looking out for my well-being. Its just that they have a mean and nasty VP who apparently can't read my account correctly that I have a problem with.

 

[dreamin in pa]

ok, now I get it. Yeah, it's good they were looking for fraudulent charges and were worried and concerned that way. But that VP needs to get another line of work. If she can't be bothered to help one of the banks customers, she shouldn't be working there. I mean, really, that's her job.

I had our bank put a hold on my account already when I paid for 4 rooms for our vacation. They couldn't have been nicer when I called to get it fixed. I was at home when I found out about it so the phone call was easy to make. As soon as the ATM transaction failed the second time, why didn't they offer you a phone to call to get it straightened out instead of sending you off somewhere else? I know they thought the machine was broken but still they could have been way more helpful.

 

[M&N]

WOW! Just cannot believe the bank VP no less. Glad you reported it. It is your money after all. With all the competition around for banks, I would think they would be a little more concerned about your account. How could you enjoy your weekend worrying about it? You know you have us Killers behind your venting. Can't they give you money at the window in the bank with your card? You've got ID?
Does it hurt your credit rating to change banks? My check shows when I opened the account. The date is beside my name. My mom said when she would cash a check in retail, they had to look there to see how old the account was. When she had someone take money out of her account, the bank wanted to give her a new number and she told them to make sure her original date was there. It wasn't and she took the checks back and made them change it. This identity theif stuff is scarey.
I looked at the bags too. Some nice ones but I could not believe the backpack had a photo showing the passport in the zipper part. That would be soooo easy for someone to steal.
I think the reason I like bags so much is no matter what size you are, the bag fits!
Have a great weekend.

 

[lighttech]

I looked at the bags too. Some nice ones but I could not believe the backpack had a photo showing the passport in the zipper part. That would be soooo easy for someone to steal.
I think the reason I like bags so much is no matter what size you are, the bag fits!
Have a great weekend.

Didn't even cross my mind!!! But, you are right. That would be a very silly place to put your passport or other important documents. I suppose it was just an illustration... I think that was the one that said right in the description that it had an interior "security pocket" or something.

 

[pepperw23]

Thanks so much for humoring. Its very rare that I get upset enough to raise my voice to someone in service. But as VP, I would think she would know SOMETHING about customer service. And in this day, with all sorts of ID theft, you'd think she's show some concern too about my account.

I'm so upset I could spit. Or cry. I havne't decided yet. Thanks for listening.

Go ahead and spit and cry...what the heck do both. I would be mad too. There is no excuse for the way you were treated!!

Dreamin'- DD said she gave that bag to DS last year and DS said it is pretty much gross now from the ball field. I will keep looking for something too.

 

[whgrn]

Hi guys. I hate to be a total downer, but I need to vent. No, I need to cry, or something, I don't even know what. I feel like I am coming unglued. I feel like things are spiraling out of control and I don't know what to do.

I won't go into all the sordid details, but here's the short version.

1--DS is getting worse. His attitude is horrible. He seems to have this sense of entitlement, like the whole world owes him something. He orders us around and expects us to jump at his commands. He seems to think the entire world revolves around him. Nothing is ever his fault. Everything belongs to him, and no one can touch it, but if something belongs to someone else, he thinks nothing about taking it with out permission, never putting it back, and gets mad if you complain about it. It's gotten so bad, even BFF mentioned it today (she had my kids for 24 hours). We both wonder how long it will be before DD has enough and just explodes in his face. (she is his main target) I have punished, I have begged, I have prayed, I have taken him to counseling, I have done everything I can think of doing. I hate to say it, but I do not like my own child. He is impossible to live with 90% of the time, bearable 9% of the time, and very sweet 1% (or less) of the time. He is 11. He is a tyrant. I shudder to think what will happen when he is older (and bigger). I am starting to think that these emotional problems go way beyond the ADHD.

2--I am falling back down into the black hole of depression. I had been on 2 antidepressants for about the last 16 months (only one before that), but i'd been doing so well that I asked my doctor in early February if I could wean off one. She agreed, so I did. very slowly. I've been totally off for maybe 3 weeks now. I'd been noticing lately that my emotions seem more vivid. I hated the feeling of numbness, where I couldn't feel anything at all. But more and more it seems like I've been increasingly weepy. Things that are maybe a little poignant or touching, that had NO effect on me at all, started to make me a little choked up/emotional. Now, I hear a song, I read a post, I have a thought, and my throat closes up like there's a lump in there the size of a watermelon, and the tears are right there. This is constant, several times a day. And today, I've been just plain soggy. I do not want to go back on this second antidepressant. I realize I will never be able to go off the remaining one, but I thought at least if I could drop one of them it would be OK. But I'm impatient, irritable, and *****y all the time lately, and now this. If I do go back on the second medication, it will be a few weeks before it kicks in. I don't know if I should just do it and talk to the doctor on Monday, or wait, or what.

3--I'm scared. I mean really, really, really scared. Because I have this thing, this big lump, in my abdomen and it's growing by the day and I don't know what it is and I'm so afraid it's cancer and I don't want to die or even be so sick just when I'm finally getting healthy for the first time in my life. I have no idea what it is. But it's grown, in about a week, to the size of a jumbo egg or slightly bigger. It hurts when I press on it. It's not a new hernia. It's the wrong place to be my ovary At frist, when it was smaller, I thought maybe it was a pus pocket or something, connected to this stupid abdominal incision that has been oozing for the last 5 years, but is finally starting to actually heal. I do have another smaller lump that IS a pus pocket, but it hasn't grown, and actually seems to be shrinking a bit. I was scheduled to see my surgeon on April 14th, but I called today and made an appointment for this coming Monday instead. I hope and pray that he will put my mind at ease that its something simple. i don't even care if I have to have yet another surgery to fix whatever it is. i just don't want it to be cancer.

I know God isn't supposed to give us more than we can handle, and I know the only reason I've made it this far is through Him, but I am at the end of my rope and i dont' know how much longer i can hold on. I dont' want to tell my mom or my sister or my BFF about this because they will be so worried, and maybe for nothing. But I know you guys care enough to be supportive and encouraging but you don't know me well enough to lose sleep over it. Does that make any sense? It probably doesn't so if I said it all wrong I'm sorry.

Please pray for me. I just feel like I'm coming unglued and all I can do is sit and watch it happen. I am not a worrier. I am an eternal optimist. But I can't find the silver lining today. I'm too scared.

I'm sorry. I know some of you have posted about problems today and it's not that i don't care, i really do. I just can't even think about anything anymore and I don't know what else to do.

Thanks for letting me ramble. You guys are the best. I really don't know what I would do without your support on here.

 

[pepperw23]

Oh Whgrn, I am so sorry you are having such a rough go of it right now. Let's set about trying to cheer you up. Then Monday when you go see your Doctor maybe you can talk about getting your medicine changed.

As a matter of fact, that is a good place to start...the medicine. Have you seen all those warnings? Some of them can react with your body and actually make you worse. You need to tell your Doctor how you are feeling ASAP. You may need a lower dose, or may need to be switched to a new one. I know this from experience. My DH was on Paxil for years and he was the biggest pain in the patoot for about the last 6 months or so he was on it. I finally talked him in to telling out Doctor it seemed to be making it worse and he switched him to Effexor. My DH has been his normal happy self (you should not feel numb either BTW)

Gonna post more, just want you to see I am steady typing.......

 

[pepperw23]

I am sorry DS is misbehaving. It has been my experience that DS's around that age are generally bossy, rude, arrogant etc.... Yet we love them anyway.

My DS is 20 now and is an angel rolleyes1 okay he is well behaved, in school and at least acts like he sorta likes me), but it was not always that way.

Royal pain at 11-12. Ya know they say that 11-14 for boys is tough and 15-20 for girls is tough. I have one of each and I believe it!!!!

Here is what helped me get through the adolecense monster:

What are some things that seem to make him happy? Does he like sports? Does he enjoy acting etc... Wait, I'll come back to that thought... Another thing I found with my DS was the less I reacted the better he behaved. I used to fuss at him when he would pick on DD. One day my Mother..who rocks BTW....stopped me and said I should just casually say "Nick, stop please" then go on about my business. If he didn't stop after that then a diversion was necessary. That is when I would dig in to my list of his "likes" and divert his attention there.

For example, DS, as I have mentioned, is a baseball freak so when he was misbehaving I would divert him by grabbing the gloves and go play catch with him. If it was cold out I would break the rules and work on "grounders" in the den. You get the picture. Hey it is either him or you at this point and I say all rules out the window. Besides, for some strange reason breaking the rules once in a while seems to earn you great respect in the eyes of an 11 year old boy.

Another thing I did was I spoke to DD (even though she was 8 lol) and asked her to help me teach Nick how to talk to girls by not fussing at him, but to please come get me...okay I can not lie...that did NOT work. Seemed like a good theory to me.

more in a sec....

 

[pepperw23]

My Doctor told me that 99.9% of the things people see him about turn out to be treatable. I believe it...remember when my FIL had that mass in his lung? He is now 100% cancer free, so don't sweat it. I bet it turns out to be some sort of scar tissue, or possibly something related to weight loss etc....


Life is generally good. Even though the lessons God gives us are hard at the time, we do come out the other end better people for it. You probably need this time in your life to help you cope with something later in life...or more probably to be better equipped to help someone else by your experience. But being the loving God that he is he always rewards us for it in the end.

Someone once told me when I was under an extreme amount of stress that when you are having hard times that you should rejoice because it means God thinks enough of you to give you a very important lesson....well it made me feel good anyway. Chin up...things will get better I promise, they always do.

As always I am here to lend an ear if you need it and won't get offended if you tell me where I can put my advice (for what it is worth we all know what opinions are like )

 

[MagiKitty]

my dear dear whgrn...

I am so sorry for the trying time you are having right now. It is a lot and I know it just seems too much when you think about it. You are doing the right thing. You are asking for help. You are looking to tackle what you can. That is all anyone of us can do.

First off, you did the right thing by upping your appointment. Anything that is noticably growing at a rapid rate would alarm anyone. I know these next few days will be difficult to get through, with all the worrying, but you just need to stop, take a breath, and go on. Monday will come soon enough. You will have your answers, and then you will know what to do next.

You are an amazing person, we can all tell that from your lovely, funny, articulate, amusing posts. I know the struggle you are having in dealing with your depression and the approach in handling it. You need to discuss this with your doctor. Perhaps instead of going back on your second medication, you need to reevaluate other treatment options, perhaps a newer single medication that will alleviate your symptoms. If you need to get help to get you through this period, then do it. It may not be forever, it may just be for this trying time.

I do not have children, but I'm rather close with my nephews. My older nephew didn't have a younger difficult pubescent age, but my younger guy is going through one right now, quite similar to your DS. He seems to know everything, is rather disrespectful and respects no boundaries. It is quite difficult for me to witness his obnoxious behavior. It also seems directly mostly at his mother. While I do hope that this stage will pass, so too must you find the strength to deal with it appropriately. You know your child best, and you want what is right for him. Keep the faith and keep searching for the disciplinary action that is right for the both of you.

How I wish I could be there to give you hugs and cry along with you right now. You are carrying such a burden and I wish we could share it with you. Please know that it too shall pass, you have more strength than you ever imagined, and you are never alone.

 

[pepperw23]

Great post Magikitty!!!!!!

 

[pepperw23]

Good article.

http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080317/NEWS05/803170322/1081/COL