Thoughts on birthday party for teens.

[kacaju]

I can't imagine
girls being "done" with pool parties at age 13. Different strokes I guess, and different areas of the country.

Many girls are just getting their periods by 13 and are not up for using tampons just yet. So, yes, pool parties tend to fade out around this time. We have a pool in the backyard and I noticed this with my girls and their friends

 

[MrsDuck]

I didn't think most teens wanted a party "at" a place like a public pool, YMCA or bowling alley. If I remember from my middle school and high school days, a party would just be hanging out at someone's house...hopefully with no parents bugging us.

Bowling and swimming parties sound like parties for younger kids, but that's just my opinion. I personally wouldn't pay for that many kids to go bowling.

Agreed!

That said, swimming is really popular in South Florida. Heck, even the adults do it. We had a "party", for lack of a better word, last year where we had a BBQ, used the pool, etc.

 

[StitchesGr8Fan]

Many girls are just getting their periods by 13 and are not up for using tampons just yet. So, yes, pool parties tend to fade out around this time. We have a pool in the backyard and I noticed this with my girls and their friends

For the OP, the kids are 14-16. That *might* make a difference in the ability to deal with a period and swimming.

 

[luvsJack]

Dd will be 15 her next birthday. her parties for the past few years have been 2 parts. A large group going to the local waterpark for the biggest part of the day and then coming back here for a bonfire and cookout and some girls staying the night.

The waterpark is the most expensive part but having the food and all at home cuts the cost.

Pool and swimming parties have not slowed down for teen girls here at all

 

[teacherforhi]

Am I the only one that thinks it's strange that the OP asked her daughter what she wanted, the daughter tells her, and mom completely discounts that and asks the DIS instead? I understand the financial aspects of the bowling and I agree with some others--give her a budget and help her figure out how to have the party she wants within that budget--not asking complete strangers if your daughter wants a pool party instead.

 

[mhsjax]

Many girls are just getting their periods by 13 and are not up for using tampons just yet. So, yes, pool parties tend to fade out around this time. We have a pool in the backyard and I noticed this with my girls and their friends

I know exactly what I am talking about, at least in my experience. My DD just turned 14, all of her friends have their periods,we have a pool as do a lot of her friends, Pool parties have not slowed down. Maybe with some it slows down, but not with all. Also these girls don't give a flying flip about being seen in a bathing suit in front of boys, they do it all the time. Again, maybe others do, but around here, it isn't given a second thought. They also go to the beach with boys, not a big deal at all.

 

[tink_n_pooh]

If she said she wants to go bowling I am assuming she would rather go bowling.

FWIW I agree with PPs who said pool parties can be uncomfortable, especially for teens, not all teens but some (a lot if you don't live in an area where kids are always at the beach or pool anyway). And at that age I would have not wanted the planned party at the bowling alley rather just going bowling with my friends, leave and do pizza and a bonfire

 

[luvsJack]

If she said she wants to go bowling I am assuming she would rather go bowling.

FWIW I agree with PPs who said pool parties can be uncomfortable, especially for teens, not all teens but some (a lot if you don't live in an area where kids are always at the beach or pool anyway). And at that age I would have not wanted the planned party at the bowling alley rather just going bowling with my friends, leave and do pizza and a bonfire[/QUOTE]

This is what, I would think, the OP's dd wanted. When dd and her friends go to the waterpark--its not a planned party thing. Just a group of kids going like they do 2 or 3 times throughout the summer. Then they come to the house for cook-out, etc.

 

[CharliNye]

When I was that age we didn't do big parties anymore.

Usually you MAYBE had five friends and went to a movie or out for pizza etc.

Having anything more then that seems indulgent. If it was a sweet 16 then ok, maybe something a bit bigger but still, back in the 80's we just wanted to hang out with our friends, the idea of a big party seemed weird.


I honestly think movies at home, ordering pizzas and letting the kids have fun seems better then spending a lot of money to take them out somewhere.

 

[luvsJack]

I know exactly what I am talking about, at least in my experience. My DD just turned 14, all of her friends have their periods,we have a pool as do a lot of her friends, Pool parties have not slowed down. Maybe with some it slows down, but not with all. Also these girls don't give a flying flip about being seen in a bathing suit in front of boys, they do it all the time. Again, maybe others do, but around here, it isn't given a second thought. They also go to the beach with boys, not a big deal at all.

Its the same here. If they didn't want to be around boys with a suit on it would be a long, boring summer! Everything they do includes swimming of some sort.

DD's biology teacher is taking them all on a trip in two weeks to the coast and then out to an island. Every student will be in a bathing suit all day long. It would be a miserable trip for anyone that didn't want to wear one.

 

[aprilgail2]

DD's biology teacher is taking them all on a trip in two weeks to the coast and then out to an island. Every student will be in a bathing suit all day long. It would be a miserable trip for anyone that didn't want to wear one.

Thats one trip my daughter wouldn't go on- she would just stay at school that day.

 

[worm761]

I think since you asked your DD and she told you what she wants, you should set a budget. Take the friends bowling. NOT a bowling party at the bowling alley. Then, come home and do build your own pizzas with a bonfire and smores. And if you can get the giant TV screen blow up thing, I would rent a movie too.

 

[Kat77]

Set a budget and let her plan it. She can decide what is more important- smaller bowling party with pizza or a backyard shindig with more guests.

Also, there is no way I'd agree to transporting that many teens.

 

[LJSquishy]

When I was growing up (I'm only 28 so it wasn't that long ago) anytime there were activities involved at a teenage birthday party like bowling, skating, etc, we brought our own money to participate. Is that weird? I wouldn't expect you to pay for bowling for 16 teens. Maybe that is how others think it should be, though, I don't know.

Bowling would be much more fun for them I think...so I would figure out a way to make that work. Whether it means not doing pizza and just doing dessert or snacks at your house (and maybe just soda at the bowling alley), or getting pizzas delivered at your house if it's considerably cheaper. I'm sure you've already triple-checked that you are receiving the lowest bowling rate possible for that many guests?

 

[luvsJack]

Thats one trip my daughter wouldn't go on- she would just stay at school that day.

I was that way as a teen. Wouldn't wear a swim suit or even shorts in front of a lot of people. I thought i was too fat and would look bad. I realize now that i wasn't and that i missed a lot feeling that way. i am so glad that Dd doesn't have those same hang ups that i did.
Not saying your Dd has hang ups just that i hope she doesn't.

 

[Kellydelly]

I would just have everyone at your home for dinner, cake, and a bonfire. Is this a milestone birthday?

 

[aprilgail2]

I was that way as a teen. Wouldn't wear a swim suit or even shorts in front of a lot of people. I thought i was too fat and would look bad. I realize now that i wasn't and that i missed a lot feeling that way. i am so glad that Dd doesn't have those same hang ups that i did.
Not saying your Dd has hang ups just that i hope she doesn't.

She hates the beach, hates walking in sand, has never liked swimming in the ocean (ewwww fish poop in there!!!) and she is not thrilled about swimming in a pool (I don't want chlorine in my hair!!) --she just is not into the whole "water thing" since she was about 11. She does wear shorts though- even at summer camp a bunch of the girls never do the swimming part because it would mess up their make up --- yes they wear make up at summer camp ROFLMAO.

 

[mhsjax]

Thats one trip my daughter wouldn't go on- she would just stay at school that day.

Guess that is the difference in areas of the country. Where I live kids would LOVE this type of trip. In fact there is a camp every summer that all they do is wind surf and do marine science stuff, they live in their bathing suits for a week, 6 hours a day. This camp fills up faster than any other camp around here. EVen with teen girls.

AGain, no right or wrong, just difference in the area.

ETA: My boys don't care a thing about the beach either, they like pools ok, and we have one. DD would literally live at the beach, Last summer she decided to learn to surf, she doesn't care what is in that water, including the Great White they found off the coast. She goes out way past where I am comfortable, it worries me.

 

[HM]

How about borrowing a couple Wii consoles and getting the Sports games that come with Bowling on them? Set up a couple TVs in your living room and let the kids play there. Order in pizza and then do the marshmallow roast.

We used to go bowling on New Years Day each year with my extended family, now we just stay at our house and bowl there. Plus we can then play other sports games too!

 

[jen0610]

When I was that age we didn't do big parties anymore.

Usually you MAYBE had five friends and went to a movie or out for pizza etc.

Having anything more then that seems indulgent. If it was a sweet 16 then ok, maybe something a bit bigger but still, back in the 80's we just wanted to hang out with our friends, the idea of a big party seemed weird.


I honestly think movies at home, ordering pizzas and letting the kids have fun seems better then spending a lot of money to take them out somewhere.

It's for her 16th. She's never had a big party. Last year she had 4 firends over. They did a huge water balloon fight, with her brother. We did hamburgers and the bon fire. She would just like to do something bigger for her 16th, which I understand. She's actually thinking a lot smaller than most of her firends, knowing that the budget is tighter for us than most all of her close friends.

She said while going to the really cool bowling alley would be nice, she knows that it's to expensive. With that, I looked at the other bowling alley close to us. They could go bowling for 2 games, with 6 on each lane and it would only run me $81.00. That includes the cost of shoes. That seems a lot better cost. Same distance to both from our place.

So, I think that is what we are going to do. She also said something about water balloons again, but we will see about that later. All of the kids she has said she was asking would love the water balloons. Over half of them are going to another party the week prior that is going to have water gun tag being played. These kids don't have an issue with getting wet, then hanging out.