Those Who Have Given Pets as Gifts UPDATE page 4: The cat has come home!

[Eeyores Butterfly]

I am going to preface this with I do not want a debate on whether or not it is right to give a pet as a gift.

Now onto the thread: Aaron recently moved into an apartment that allows pets. He took care of his family cat when he lived at home and has been telling me how much he misses having a cat of his own. I talked to his roommate about the possibility of getting him a kitten for Christmas (his roommate has a cat that never comes out of his room and is not people friendly). He was fine with it. I also ran it by his family. Tomorrow his sister and I are going to go pick out the cat from Wayside Waifs. I already have all the things he will need to get started except for food.

I am leaning towards a young male since his roommate's cat is female. If you did give a pet as a gift, how did you present it? Obviously I want it to be a surprise. It will stay in my house until Christmas Eve which is when I will present him with the kitten. I am leaning towards just putting a bow around its neck, but if anybody who has done this has any other (humane) ideas, I'm open. I can't wait to see the look on his face!

 

[DVCLiz]

Despite my strong opinions on giving a pet as a gift, I will only say that if you have a female and a young male in the same apartment, you'd better make sure they are both neutered/spayed, or else you will be able to do all of next year's Christmas shopping as well.

Get the same sex as the roommate's cat - a female.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

Despite my strong opinions on giving a pet as a gift, I will only say that if you have a female and a young male in the same apartment, you'd better make sure they are both neutered/spayed, or else you will be able to do all of next year's Christmas shopping as well.

Get the same sex as the roommate's cat - a female.

Despite my strong opinions that I also have about giving a pet as a gift, I'm going to agree with Liz and recommend a female cat. I didn't get the reasoning behind getting a cat of the opposite sex.

And I'd ask the person first...perhaps they don't really want the expense of caring for a cat right now. I hate to see pets being given up because it's not working out for some reason.

No debate...just sayin'.

 

[samshane]

Even if neutered, male cats can spray to mark territory... I would be leery of that in an apartment that they do not own. Believe me, I had this issue first hand with a male cat (and I loved him dearly). Some cats will never like other cats - other become best friends.

Again, no debates from me either - but I agree with the PP... Also, I have always like to meet my new family member first. We go to the shelter and see who we "click" with, and who clicks with us.

Good luck!

 

[Luv Bunnies]

We're giving our boys 2 bunnies for Christmas. We have been fostering them since the end of August for a rescue organization. My DH and I decided to keep them and we officially adopted them on December 1 but haven't told the boys. DS11 has been begging us to keep them and we keep saying they'll be going to a permanent home pretty soon. DS14 says he can't bear giving them to another family. Little do they know that on Christmas morning, we're going to put them under the tree in a carrier with a note saying that we're keeping them!

I would put kitty under the tree with a bow around his neck. You could even put him in a carrier (which can be part of his present) so he'll have to look inside. That would make it even more fun!

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

The female cat is spayed and it is a requirement of Wayside Waifs that any pet how is not already neutered when adopted be neutered when they are of age. If it is not already neutered, I am going to be paying for that as part of the gift.

The reasoning behind a male cat is that cats of the opposite sex will get along better than two cats of the same sex. It decreases the chance there will be problems. That is why I got a male cat after Makya died, to make it easier on Eowyn.

ETA: Thanks for the people who actually answered the question. I know not everyone agrees. Believe me, this was not a split second decision. This has been well thought out. I am paying for all of the initial vaccinations and will pay for neutering if the pet is not already neutered. Money will never be a concern as I will always help him if he needs it. If there were ever a circumstance where the cat would no longer be able to live with him, I would take it in. Wayside Waifs also has a wonderful process where they match pets based on the circumstances of the family. I will not say that a female is out of the question, but right now I am leaning towards a male just to make it easier on the existing cat in the apartment.

 

[MizTink]

i gave my kids a puppy on 2 separate christmas'. my sister gave my dad a dog for father's day last year. the first dog was in a box all wrapped up in christmas paper. he was only in it for about 2 minutes and the looks on their faces was priceless!!!!! the other christmas puppy was given on christmas eve and they just came home and their dad was laying on the floor sleeping with the pup.
when my sister gave my dad the dog she tried to feel him (and our mom) out to see how serious they were about having a dog in the house. they really did want a dog, they just weren't sure what kind or how to pick one out. my sister ended up just giving dad the dog supplies and telling him that she was getting the dog too. she asked if he wanted to go together to pick one out, or she could do it for him. they decided to trust her choice. she went to the sheriff's dept. and picked out an adult dog who turned out to be the BEST dog i have EVER seen!!!!!!! she is just perfect.
good luck and have fun!!!!

 

[Eeyores Butterfly]

I was just filling out the app on the website, and I noticed that right now they are having a huge adoption drive for their cats. They have cut the price to $25 because (and that includes fixing) because apparently they are very overrun with cats right now. It seems like it is meant to be.

If anybody is reading in the KC area, the drive is going on until December 31.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Something you might want to consider is that usually at a shelter etc. you cannot adopt a pet for someone else. I know here they check references etc. They will not let you adopt a pet for anyone other than you. I would check that out first.

 

[Sandy321]

Here's a story!

first - I would enlist if at all possible the roommate AND his cat to go with you to pick out the companion - and let the shelter help you find a companion! (they will have the perfect pet in mind!)

so... I have been accused by my mother of not picking out pets well - at all...

but I really really wanted a dog. but my son is allergic. Now he's 21 and has his own apartment - so dd and I want a dog. and we visited a shelter. One dog was "ok" - but not quite the "right fit" ( dd needs a lap dog, when things go bad, she wants a pet to hug)

So I go online.

and then... dil's uncle wants to rescue the most pathetic awesome looking yellow lab - omg.. but someone beat us to the rescue.

so I go back online.

unbeknownst to me - my son dil and dh decided to "gift" dd and me a dog for Christmas! BUT dh couldnt keep the secret from me any longer than 1 week!! (Bless his heart!! ) Now, when I came in the door(I went to the bank to get money to adopt a dog from the Humane Society - why dd decided she wanted a corgi I couldnt imagine, but i found 2 at the Humane Society!!) so I come in - they are all in the living room with this dog. who had a bow on him...

they were all so disappointed in my "non" reaction... I really was in shock... and my first thought was... darn it, now i dont get to go to Chicago!! It took awhile to sink in!!

but I love this dog!! and I'm so glad DH and DS picked him out!! and they brought their dog to make sure it was a good dog with other dogs!!

So for this family - the gift was perfect.

BUT I really disappointed everyone with my non reaction (I keep telling them I was in shock! seriously dh picked him out? and gave him a flea bath? and ...)

Talk to the shelter and ask about a cat that would get along with the cat already present in the home!!

Good luck!!

 

[Sandy321]

Something you might want to consider is that usually at a shelter etc. you cannot adopt a pet for someone else. I know here they check references etc. They will not let you adopt a pet for anyone other than you. I would check that out first.

oh - that's right - the shelter kept saying that "pets never go over well as a surprise or a gift" and that it was a HUGE exception when they allowed dh to adopt without meeting me - or dd! Partly it was because ds adopted a dog a few months prior from them (and I was with ds that day! We spent about 2 hours there!) and he brought Teddy( and the shelter remembered Teddy - and I guess they remembered me!) with them to meet Zeus!! and partly because the other family that came in - the dad was a screaming meanie - and they wanted Zeus to be with dh instead!! (we're guessing on that part!!)

 

[Mickey'snewestfan]

I'd want to choose my own kitten, one that spoke to my heart, and I think it would be better for the kitten to come straight home, rather than spending time at your home.

Given that, I'd wrap up a bunch of boxes of all sizes with a catnip mouse in one, and a litter pan in another, etc . . . and let him figure it out -- then take him to the shelter on the 26th to pick the perfect kitten.

 

[Sleepy]

I am going to take a slightly different approach.

Having a cat as a pet is a very different relationship from that of a dog. In my experience, dogs can have an almost instant attachment to people. Cats have such strange personalities.

I personally believe that if you intend to give a cat as a pet, you really should allow the person to pick the cat out. Maybe this person would rather start out with a kitten. They might have a preference of color (I know I do). They might prefer a short haired cat to cut down on the necessity of grooming. Some breeds require more medical attention that can get terribly expensive. Males usually develop more urinary problems. Female cats tend to be more vocal and some people might not like that. I believe females are also more independent, while the males are more cuddly. Some people don't care what sex/breed/color they get. Others know exactly what fits their personality best and are more picky.

I believe in allowing the pets to pick us, not the other way around. I personally like to stand in front of the cages and watch the response of the cats. I prefer the cat who after a while of getting use to my presence, will come to the front of the cage and try to show affection. Someone else might be ok with the cat that does not even look at them.

My husband adopted a cat after mine died. I was not ready to get another one, so he picked the cat. She was an older cat (which was not an issue with him). He chose her because she had the most beautiful green eyes. What we did not know was she had a serious disease that could not be cured. I don't remember the name of it, but it causes terrible sores on the lips, inside the mouth, and throat. The only thing that helps it was steroid shots. Apparently this was the reason she was at the shelter to begin with. My guess is the last owner or the shelter gave her the steroid shot to hide the condition, because she looked fine when we got her.

It was not until a couple months later that she was declining. Not even special food helped. We don't regret getting her. She had a fine life for as long as she lasted (only a couple years even with the steroid shots and special food), but my point is, if you are getting a cat for someone else, be careful of the expense and possible heartache your choice can create.

I would not choose a cat based on what a roommate has. They will not be roommates forever. I would be upset if I prefer male cats and someone got me a female cat because they felt there would be a conflict of personality with the roommate's cat.

 

[nskjerven]

We're giving our boys 2 bunnies for Christmas. We have been fostering them since the end of August for a rescue organization. My DH and I decided to keep them and we officially adopted them on December 1 but haven't told the boys. DS11 has been begging us to keep them and we keep saying they'll be going to a permanent home pretty soon. DS14 says he can't bear giving them to another family. Little do they know that on Christmas morning, we're going to put them under the tree in a carrier with a note saying that we're keeping them!

I would put kitty under the tree with a bow around his neck. You could even put him in a carrier (which can be part of his present) so he'll have to look inside. That would make it even more fun!

I think a parent offering a pet to a child (where that parent lives and cares for the pet) is a tad different than offering one to another person in another home. Kudos for being able to foster the bunnies you did. I think we saw many of those poor little buns next to the baseball fields. I wish we could have had another but one is our limit.

too bad you didn't just skip posting anything then.......

Since you commented on my post, I'm opening the door and giving the rest of my opinion.

Much as the pp stated I strongly believe that a pet is something very personal and it isn't something that one person choses for another. I'd never want to receive one, nor burden someone with one. I find the act selfish.

 

[TheZue]

I would give him money for a cat and maybe purchase a lot of pet supplies for his new cat. I find picking a pet a very important part of bonding for me, and since cats live 20 years it's one of those extremely rare life experiences that I'd be very sad if I missed. I remember taking every one of my pets home and they are some of my fondest memories.

 

[mum4jenn]

How about giving him a certificate to the adoption place so he can go pick his own kitty out? That way he still has the gift to open and the chance to pick out the one he falls in love with.

 

[DMRick]

Once you post on a public board, all bets are off on responses, IMO.

Our rescue group will not only not allow you to get a pet as a gift, other than parents for child, but we would also not send home a kitten to a home with another pet that may not play with it. Makes for a lonely life, for the kitten, especially if someone will be gone working most of the day. I hope you are looking for an older cat, one over 6-8 months, if this is the case.

I also believe the best idea is a gift certificate (with the gift on Christmas being the litter pan, food and toys) so he can pick out his own kitten. This is an 18 year commitment, so it's really important the cat be a fit for the new owner. Why should you decide what 18 year commitment someone else should have? I love it when someone comes to look at cats, and it's obvious that a certain cat is the fit they wanted. Sometimes it's obvious it is not.

I applaud you that you are prepared to pay for expenses, and even take in the cat if needed, but please, let him decide which one will be his roommate for the life of the cat. As for girl or boy, once neutered or spayed, it shouldn't matter which you you get him, if it's a young cat.

 

[Melmac]

I'd want to choose my own kitten, one that spoke to my heart, and I think it would be better for the kitten to come straight home, rather than spending time at your home.

Given that, I'd wrap up a bunch of boxes of all sizes with a catnip mouse in one, and a litter pan in another, etc . . . and let him figure it out -- then take him to the shelter on the 26th to pick the perfect kitten.

I would give him money for a cat and maybe purchase a lot of pet supplies for his new cat. I find picking a pet a very important part of bonding for me, and since cats live 20 years it's one of those extremely rare life experiences that I'd be very sad if I missed. I remember taking every one of my pets home and they are some of my fondest memories.

How about giving him a certificate to the adoption place so he can go pick his own kitty out? That way he still has the gift to open and the chance to pick out the one he falls in love with.

I agree! Pick him up the essentials, including a carrier cage and go with him after Christmas to let him pick out his kitty. I would like the experience of choosing "my" perfect cat.

 

[barkley]

i just want to STRONGLY suggest that no matter how reputable or well thought of the shelter is-take the kitty to your vet for testing prior to introducing it to the new household where another cat lives.

i suggest this b/c a dear friend adopted a beautiful healthy appearing kitten from the most highly regarded animal shelter in her area. despite the shelter's assurances that they had run all of the required health tests for a cat it's age they were remiss in running some necessary to diagnose fatal and highly transmissable feline diseases. the diagnosis was'nt made until a week later at the initial vet's appointment, but the kitten had been in df's home for that week and during that time transmitted the fatal illness to both adult cats that had been with df for years. all 3 cats had to be euthinzed

she later learned that even among the most reputable shelters there is a presumption that new owners are aware that before a new animal is so much as taken into an enviornment with existing pets a private health screening with one's own vet will take place to ensure the animal is'nt a carrier for any communicable diseases.

 

[MaryAnnDVC]

Once you post on a public board, all bets are off on responses, IMO.

We decided to let DS pick out his own golf clubs for Christmas, instead of making the wrong choice for him. A pet is a bit more important.