Things you just shouldn't have to say to your children...

[Talking Hands]

To a 9th grade male student: Please go get dressed! (had his pants down to his knees)

To my daughter at age 2: Lipstick is not fingerpaint !

To me by my 21 yo: Mom you aren't going to use that toothbrush to brush your teeth are you? ( I was using an old one to clean the toilet)

To my daughters many times: No you can't bring the turtle in and make it a pet. (about Florida box turtle that lived in our back yard)

No you can't have another cat!

You're paying how much for a bow! ( to my 25 yo violist daughter)

You want a viola that costs how much?!!!! ( to both daughters at various times)

No I will not tell you the meaning of that sign. Just don't use it! (to many hearing students)

 

[vhoffman]

Here's mine--to my then 3 year old son "Don't pee in the cat litter". It one of those automatic cleaning litterboxes and he'd pee in it to watch it work.

 

[mbb]

My 6 yr old at the video store...which is as jammed as Main Street USA on Wishes...

"I want a kids movie...Mommy are you and Daddy going to get an adult movie tonight?"

Grown up Movie!! Grown up movie!!

..."No, honey, mommy and daddy are not getting an "adult" movie"...

*sigh*

 

[HappyGramma]

Oh gosh if only I could catch my breath. I can't remember when I last laughed so hard. Please keep them coming.

 

[AirForceRocks]

"Don't give your thong underwear away to the young man down the street"

 

[gdulaney]

Originally posted by Talking Hands
To my daughter at age 2: Lipstick is not fingerpaint !

Okay - not only did my mom have to tell me that lipstick doesn't go on walls...she also had to tell me not to use it as fingerpaint on her bedspread. I have no memory of doing any of this...but she has the pictures to prove it.

Ginny

 

[luvwinnie]

To my 4 yr old niece "Do not put your little sister's hand through the fence to see if the doggy bites." She is 19 now and her sister is 17...we still laugh about that one.

 

[r3ngels]

"The priest is allowed to say Jesus Christ"

My daughter was about 4 at the time and yelled really loud at church "the priest just said Jesus Christ and that is a bad word"

 

[stinkerbelle]

Originally posted by Fizban257
Said on several occassion to our 2-year-old son:

"We don't not put peas/carrots up our nose."

And in one case, tha above was followed two days later after he sneezed with:

"Oh my God, has that carrot been up your nose for two days!?!"

(We missed one during clean up)

omg - this one totally made me lose it! My younger brother was notorious for shoving things up his nose...his favorite thing was, when we were on "road trips" he wanted to pay the lady at the toll booth...with candy corn shoved up his nose.

he did have to be taken to the doctor once...he lost an M&M or Skittle up there...heheheh

 

[edcrbnsoul]

Originally posted by AirForceRocks
"Don't give your thong underwear away to the young man down the street"

see other thread

 

[twinmomplus2new]

Did you paint my bedroom wall with vaseline!!!!!! WHY?

Get the tic-tacs OUT of your nose!


Or this one 10 minutes ago. One 3 year old says to the other come on lets go in our room and play Dora Bingo... The other child is laying on my bed with me watching Tv and he responds. I can't right now I am busy Lovinnnnnnnnnnnnng Mama.

 

[msdznyduck]

When oldest DS was about 3................
"no, we do not put play-doh up our nose,"---------my response to florescent pink snot

 

[vhoffman]

After reading all this I'm coming to the conclusion that my children are "normal"!!!I was beginning to wonder, especially my son's habit of sticking things in his ear. I called his pediatrician the first time that happened and they thought I said "stuck something in his rear". Well, he hasn't gotten that weird!

 

[vhoffman]

Oh, just read the one about painting the bedroom wall with vaseline. Reminds me of when I was 4 years old and smeared all my parents records with vaseline. Wen asked why, I said I'd heard mommy say the records were scratched, so I thought I'd put some "boo-boo" cream on them! Guess kids are kids!

 

[mom2boys]

Calling out the front door in the pitch dark in 20 degree weather to my 8 yr old:
You aren't allowed to run away wearing only boxers.

 

[binny]

these are hilarious!!!

 

[kadaten]

to my 3yo at the dinner table tonight:

"Please do NOT comb your hair with your fork!"

 

[Sonya]

What a great thread! Gee, I can't wait till Sam is old enough to do some of these things.

I 've had to say this to many a high school student:

Please pull up your pants, there are some things in this world I don't want to see, and your underwear is one of them.

I've also told kids to stop PDA-*** in the halls, I'm too young to see this kind of thing.

(PDA- public display of affection)

 

[KPmom]

I am always having to tell my 2 1/2 year old dd that the cat does not want kisses. She is forever trying to kiss him on the mouth! YUCK!!!!~KPmom

 

[Serena]