Things that could end a good relationship.

[Liberty Belle]

So Im not trying to stick up for anyone. People are attracted to what people are attracted to. However, I think we have developed a tolerance because we have love for that person. There were ALL kinds of "deal breakers" I had in mind when I was single. Now I just roll my eyes and buy him his own jar of juice and peanut butter and never share the bathroom with him, lol.

I think we are also a point hardwired to be attracted like I love a man with big shoulders but also glasses(I like them a little nerdy) and my husband likes a woman that fills out the top of her tshirt. Those are just preferences and with that along with love comes tolerance for other things. I mean real love and not the last 5 minutes because you are hot love. His tune could change later with a real love, should he find it.

Im not sure why all is harping on him now. He has been discussing his preferences for a couple of years now.

I know. I'm currently in an irritable time of the calendar, so it annoyed me anew. . I agree, things I may find unattractive in a stranger, I might not care about or even find attractive in the man I love.

 

[TheAviator]

Really ran with that one didn't you?! Yikes - resorting to personal insults... Taking his opinion a bit to heart aren't you?

Thank you aaarcher86

As you can see I have a real full set of hair. I actually found that ladies post quite amusing.

Oh but could you imagine if I reversed her "cue ball" statement for something similar in reference to being over weight, hmmm I think that would cause quite the excrement storm.

 

[Liberty Belle]

That begs the question though, is that really him?

For all we know, he could be an 84 year old woman trolling the boards. Heck, he might even be an overweight, short haired old woman in flat heels!

Lol just for disclosure: I am not sitting in a tree.

 

[Liberty Belle]

Well I'm not bald so I don't have that issue. I don't consider touching the shoulders to be short. I meant a short guys haircut. Shoulder length is just fine. But again, these are just my opinions. You don't necessarily have to take them as the gold standard.

I think, though what bothers me about some things you post, is you often say you think most men feel the way you do. I just don't think that's true.

 

[goofyintoronto]

I think, though what bothers me about some things you post, is you often say you think most men feel the way you do. I just don't think that's true.

I agree. To assume you speak for the majority of men is a bit of a stretch.

 

[TheAviator]

He didn't say he needed a skinny girl. Frankly, I find too skin just as unappealing as overweight in women.

It's his opinion of beauty. If you don't like it, teach your kids what you want them to think of beauty. I'm. It a fan of girls trying to be models as its unrealistic but I'm also not a fan of America being an obese nation because we make excuses and tell people big is beautiful.

Again, you're clearly bringing some personal issues into this. There are plenty of women around that are fit, won't wear anything but heals, and have long flowing locks. And he digs that. There's also plenty of men that prefer girls who play sports and relax in sweat pants without make up. Different strokes.

I do as well. Too skinny can be as unattractive as the other extreme. Yes I do think some of these posters are taking this personally due to the fact that they possibly are dealing with these issues themselves.

All I'm talking about is making an effort to stay in shape. This country has a huge problem with obesity. Too many people think its OK to be lazy and let themselves go. I'm sorry unless you have a serious medical condition letting yourself get to 250 or 300 plus is just NOT ok from a health standpoint, let alone what it looks like visually.

And I'm not missing out on anything. There are just as many beautiful women that think keeping themselves in shape that have great hearts and are kind, sweet and giving as there are people who aren't attractive. So why should I not seek out the most ideal package.

And what these women won't' admit is that most of them probably would not have gone for their SO if he had a huge beer gut, wore clothes that were 3 inches too small and were bald. Even though I'm sure none will admit it and some will even chime in with, hey my husband is fat and ugly.

And they can call me a pig if they want, but they don't know me. People that know me know that I have a good heart. I seriously do not think most women would think that having a certain set of standards makes them "a pig"

 

[Goofy_Disney_Dad]

I think, though what bothers me about some things you post, is you often say you think most men feel the way you do. I just don't think that's true.

I think it may be that he's more willing to say it where many men won't. Not saying I agree or feel the same way, but it's interesting how personal some of his comments have been taken. Everyone has standards that they expect from a partner. To deny that would be dishonest. He simply made the mistake of actually saying what his were instead of just keeping it to himself. Not sure why that makes him a bad guy but there ya go.

 

[TheAviator]

How is it a personal insult when said poster is not bald? My dad is bald. Completely. And he looks awesome! He looks weird with hair. But to say that a woman cutting her hair is a deal breaker is just as ridiculous. This poster is a shallow pig. Now ThAT is personal.

Sent from my iPhone using DISBoards

I am not a pig, but my place is currently a sty

 

[TheAviator]

From the front. Maybe he's got a big old bald spot in the back like my poor, 27 year old brother. Anyway, I already said I had thought she looked him up elsewhere or something.

No I most certainly do not, PM me your email and I will send you a 360 panorama picture of my head of fake blond but full hair. All real, no plugs

 

[aaarcher86]

No I most certainly do not, PM me your email and I will send you a 360 panorama picture of my head of fake blond but full hair. All real, no plugs

Lmao. I believe you!

 

[Liberty Belle]

I think it may be that he's more willing to say it where many men won't. Not saying I agree or feel the same way, but it's interesting how personal some of his comments have been taken. Everyone has standards that they expect from a partner. To deny that would be dishonest. He simply made the mistake of actually saying what his were instead of just keeping it to himself. Not sure why that makes him a bad guy but there ya go.

It just seems like he (in most of his posts) emphasizes outer beauty over inner beauty and its so different from how I feel, that it bothers my senses.

Most of the men I know would love a gorgeous woman, but it is not a necessity and they certainly don't talk about it all the time.

 

[TheAviator]

That begs the question though, is that really him?

For all we know, he could be an 84 year old woman trolling the boards. Heck, he might even be an overweight, short haired old woman in flat heels!

OK if I was going to use a Catfish fake picture I would use the Ralph Lauren Polo Model thank you very much.

 

[ashley0139]

I think the thing that offended a lot of people in this thread is that, clearly, not eating the right kind of mayo or leaving your dirty clothes out is not and actual deal breaker. Everyone who posted something like that is joking. They are not divorcing their husbands or turning down potential ones because of these issues. TheAviator was being entirely serious. Those are actual deal breakers. There is a huge, huge difference in what he was saying versus what everyone else was saying. I am skinny, have long hair, and wear heels often. And I was offended by his statement.

Oh, and TheAviator, I can assure you it's not because you're a man crashing a women's party that you get flamed.

 

[roseaster]

Really? People can't see the difference here? The OP posted, in a joking manner, about little trivial things. Everyone else chimed in, jokingly, on little annoying habits their spouse has that they have learned to grin and bear because the overall relationship is a happy, healthy, respectful one.

The appearance comments is coming from someone who does not have a successful, long-term relationship. It is a comment based on what he expects from a woman, not a joke on a silly, little thing that he has overlooked for the sake of a loving relationship. His comments were superficial, not trivial, there is a difference. There is a big difference between saying, "I stayed with my spouse in spite of his/her love of Miracle Whip," and saying, "I'd drop him like a bad habit if he gained weight or lost his hair."

For the record, I think bald is sexy. My husband is bald. My hair is short, I look terrible with long hair, thank goodness he loves me for who I am, not my hairstyle.

 

[goofyintoronto]

Im not "dealing with those issues" yet i found them quite offensive.

I do as well. Too skinny can be as unattractive as the other extreme. Yes I do think some of these posters are taking this personally due to the fact that they possibly are dealing with these issues themselves.

I think the thing that offended a lot of people in this thread is that, clearly, not eating the right kind of mayo or leaving your dirty clothes out is not and actual deal breaker. Everyone who posted something like that is joking. They are not divorcing their husbands or turning down potential ones because of these issues. TheAviator was being entirely serious. Those are actual deal breakers. There is a huge, huge difference in what he was saying versus what everyone else was saying. I am skinny, have long hair, and wear heels often. And I was offended by his statement.

Oh, and TheAviator, I can assure you it's not because you're a man crashing a women's party that you get flamed.

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

Really? People can't see the difference here? The OP posted, in a joking manner, about little trivial things. Everyone else chimed in, jokingly, on little annoying habits their spouse has that they have learned to grin and bear because the overall relationship is a happy, healthy, respectful one.

The appearance comments is coming from someone who does not have a successful, long-term relationship. It is a comment based on what he expects from a woman, not a joke on a silly, little thing that he has overlooked for the sake of a loving relationship. His comments were superficial, not trivial, there is a difference. There is a big difference between saying, "I stayed with my spouse in spite of his/her love of Miracle Whip," and saying, "I'd drop him like a bad habit if he gained weight or lost his hair."

For the record, I think bald is sexy. My husband is bald. My hair is short, I look terrible with long hair, thank goodness he loves me for who I am, not my hairstyle.

I see the difference... It's just silly to get all worked up over a man that you (general you) doesn't have to date nor marry.

Who gives a hoot what he thinks? Maybe he'll find someone just like him and live happily ever after.

 

[TheAviator]

It just seems like he (in most of his posts) emphasizes outer beauty over inner beauty and its so different from how I feel, that it bothers my senses.

Most of the men I know would love a gorgeous woman, but it is not a necessity and they certainly don't talk about it all the time.

No that is not the case at all, and I thought we had discussed this before in the past on another thread. Inner beauty is actually MORE important than outer. There is no doubt about that. I was merely discussing some more superficial issues which I though went with the mayo and being a 49ers fan. But since I am the only stag at the girls party my views are taken with a bit of.....how do I put it?

 

[aaarcher86]

I see the difference... It's just silly to get all worked up over a man that you (general you) doesn't have to date nor marry.

Who gives a hoot what he thinks? Maybe he'll find someone just like him and live happily ever after.

Can I get an amen?!

 

[goofyintoronto]

I see the difference... It's just silly to get all worked up over a man that you (general you) doesn't have to date nor marry.

Who gives a hoot what he thinks? Maybe he'll find someone just like him and live happily ever after.

But, this is what we do on Dis. Is it not???

 

[Soldier's*Sweeties]

But, this is what we do on Dis. Is it not???

Point taken..... Lol