The Un-Christmas! Dec 15-27 The Magic and Universal

[dicar123]

WARNING WARNING <Insert blinky red lights here> WARNING WARNING

Before anyone gets at all invested in this ridiculously long and extremely detailed report, I must let you know the reason for taking this trip. Our 14 year old son was killed Dec 2006. We took this trip in order to be out of town for the first anniversary of his death and to avoid Christmas "stuff".

My pre-trip does deal with grieving. The trip report itself has very much less. When I post the first page of the actual report, I will come back here and let y'all know what page it starts on so you can skip directly to there if you wish. I'll take the risk of giving away the ending and say that we had an absolutely fabulous time. Really!

Trip report starts on page 2, post #22


June 2006

My husband and I dropped the kids off with the grandparents and took our first cruise, a 4 day on Royal Caribbean. Mostly, we took the trip because we hadn’t been away together in awhile but we were also looking to see whether it was something that would appeal to our boys. While I was searching around, deciding which cruise to take, I saw information about the ruins in Cozumel. Derrick, 14 years old, really liked history and old stuff. I showed him pictures of the ruins which he thought was very cool. Best of all, it was possible to do the whole trip without taking an airplane! Derrick was desperately afraid of heights and wouldn’t consider flying. Our younger son, Dustin, was 8 years old and would like, or at least pretend to like, anything his big brother did.

We returned from our cruise, pronounced it a Very Good Time and I told Derrick that if I got a job we could start thinking about a family trip. I did not get a job, so we dropped all discussion of cruising.



December 2006

On December 18th, one week before Christmas, Derrick was hit by a car and killed. While attempting to make all the decisions and arrangements which must be made after an event like that, we were trying to “do Christmas”. None of us adults looked forward to it; we knew it would be hard. But Dustin was only 8, and his brother had just died, how could we cancel Christmas too?

So, we soldiered on the best we could. We put up the tree, we made cookies, we wrapped presents and even did some last minute shopping (my in-laws had flown in and hadn’t brought their presents. We couldn’t just let them sit there Christmas morning with no presents.) Those activities provided a much needed distraction from everything else. Still, it was pretty awful.

I knew that the only way we were functioning at all was because we were very much in shock. This year stinks, but next year has to be worse, right? Because we won’t be in shock. I knew, even before Christmas Day, that I didn’t want to have to do the whole holiday thing again next year. Christmas wasn’t going to be normal, no matter what we did and putting on happy faces and doing it all anyway struck me as almost obscene.

During that whole week, it seemed that my husband or I were either rushing out the door, talking to someone who had just arrived or on the telephone. There just wasn’t time for in-depth discussions of anything. As I passed Ed one afternoon, I grabbed him and said, “Just letting you know, we aren’t doing this next year.” He replied, “We’ll do anything you need to do.”

The problem was I didn’t know what I needed to do.

 

[dicar123]

February 2007

January and most of February passed while we stumbled through the days and tried to figure out what to do with ourselves. We didn’t get the details of what happened the day Derrick died until about mid-February and I obsessed upon every tidbit of information. I was driving myself absolutely around the bend and needed something, anything, else to think about. So, I decided to start making decisions about Christmas. The first thing I did was make a list of, “I Don’t Want To:”

I don’t want to be here, surrounded by people who are crying or looking at me with sympathy and asking me how I am.
I don’t want to put up a tree.
I don’t want to wake up Christmas morning and unwrap presents.

In short, I want to avoid every Christmas related thing that I can. But staying here, just refusing to do Christmas probably won’t work and isn’t very nice for Dustin. I need an alternate plan. I need an unChristmas…

Well, we don’t want to be here, so let’s go out of town. Might as well be warm, right? Florida sounds good (California is out since we have tons of relatives there and people crying on me is a no-no). Hmm, what about going to Disney World? It would be a bit Christmas-y, but in an observer not participator sort of way. But, we took the kids there a few years ago and we probably couldn’t take two steps without remembering, “Derrick really liked this!” or, “Derrick really hated that!”

Oh gosh, what about a Disney Cruise? It’s something we’ve never done with Derrick, and really different from a traditional Christmas. Besides, how can you be miserable with Mickey Mouse around?

Whoa, Nellie! Maybe you can be miserable, even on a Disney Cruise. What if we are horribly depressed and surrounded by happy cruisers trailing pixie dust in their wake? Maybe we should just go somewhere less…fun?

Well, I’d just finished reading a book. It was written by several mothers who had lost children. Their kids were all older teens and adults, and by the time the book was written, their loss was roughly 8-10 years in the past. Reading it seemed like a good idea, after all, they understand, don’t they? Oh, big mistake! Several of the women wrote that they aren’t friends with people who haven’t lost a child because regular people just don’t “get it”. Most of them grit their teeth through holidays, and don’t celebrate Mother’s Day at all, even if they have other children. Some said that they are different people since their loss, and they don’t really like this new person so much.



I closed the book and sat there, totally stunned. Let’s review:

1. My child is dead. While on this earth, I will never see him, talk to him or touch him ever again.
2. All the hopes and dreams I had for my son’s future have disappeared like so much smoke.
3. 14 years worth of love, care, sacrifice and teaching became moot in the blink of an eye.

Isn’t that enough? But THIS what I have to look forward to? The rest of my life filled with bitterness and anger? Feeling resentful of my friends because their kids are alive? Hating holidays and becoming a person I don’t like?

No way, not me, nuh-uh! I’ve lost enough. It can be very hard after those first smiles, laughs, and realizing you've had fun for the last 10 minutes, to deal with the guilt that surely follows. I had to remind myself over and over that I’d loved Derrick very, very well while he’d lived and that staying in that bitter, angry place would not bring him back. It would do nothing at all to hurt the people whose decisions made his death possible, and would only hurt me, Ed and Dustin.

It didn’t help that I’d kept running into other moms who expressed surprise that I had dressed, had left the house, gone shopping or back to work. They insisted that they couldn’t possibly have done these things if they were in my shoes. They only meant to encourage and support me and express admiration at my “strength”. I am certain none of these very well intentioned women ever meant to imply that I shouldn’t be able to do these things. However, it is difficult to avoid feeling that if you really loved your child, like they love theirs, then you would be at home crying. In any case, that just isn’t how I want to live the rest of my life.

Ok, I realize I’m running away from Christmas as quickly as I can, but this isn’t a permanent plan. This year, I just need some space.

We’re taking the cruise.

 

[dicar123]

We wanted to be out of town from somewhere before the 18th and not return until after Christmas. The dates weren’t working out so well and we quickly realized that we were going to have to come up with two plans instead of one.

Plan one ended up being the Disney Western Cruise leaving on the 15th. I just couldn’t make myself spend nearly twice the money for the cruise including Christmas Day. Oddly enough, the western itinerary was the cruise Derrick wanted to go on. I’ve decided to not think so much about that right now.

What shall we do with ourselves in Florida with 4 days to fill? We already decided Disney World was out, but then I saw a commercial for Universal Studios. MGM was our kids’ favorite park at DW. Dustin likes MIB, Spider Man and Nickelodeon characters. He’d probably really enjoy it. I had been to Universal California years and years ago and Ed had been to Universal Florida, but not since they built Islands of America. Being at Universal Studios on Christmas Day is very nearly the anti-traditional Christmas! That sounds like a plan!



March 2007

By the time we went ahead and made the initial arrangements, it was March! Now, it was, of course, far too soon to tell Dustin anything about the trip. We weren’t quite sure how we planned to handle Christmas at all.


Would we have a small Christmas very early? Not do it at all? No presents? We’d worry about that later. But I just could not resist putting up a Disney Cruise screen saver. Most kids might question that. Derrick would have worn me out with questions! Dustin? He either didn’t notice or didn’t care. But that is why we like him so much. He just wanders along, not causing any trouble.

 

[dicar123]

June 2007

Horrible, awful, terrible month. Within a couple of weeks, we had the last day of school (Boy, would Derrick have celebrated no longer being a freshman!), Derrick’s birthday and the 6th month anniversary of his death.

Now, speaking from a purely practical point of view, 6 months is not inherently different from 5 months or 7 months. Why should it be harder? It just is. Ed and I both spent days upon days being angry, irritable and sad. It took huge effort to keep from fighting with each other, even knowing what we were really upset about. It made me worry that planning this trip was a huge mistake.

One year is way more emotionally charged than 6 months. But we’d be 6 months further along in grieving and accepting. We didn’t have anything in particular planned for any day other than Derrick’s birthday, and even that was mostly symbolic, sentimental stuff which can be really hard. Maybe being busier in December and having interesting stuff to do will make the days pass a little easier? I don’t know. It’ll just have to be what it will be.

 

[dicar123]

July 2007

My husband’s family was having a reunion and we hadn’t attended one in awhile so we decided to go. Usually, we would drive to Colorado, taking two days because we’d have never gotten Derrick on an airplane.

We have found that doing the same things, but in a somewhat different way can help make the experience a little more tolerable. So, we flew to Colorado (Dustin for the first time), and since we weren’t doing all that driving, we decided to take a little side trip to Mount Rushmore.

This turned out to be an excellent idea. It was our first non-Derrick vacation, and I was thinking of it as a little bit of a “practice run”. We had a pretty good time. Now, Mount Rushmore wasn’t quite as exciting as I hoped it might be. It looks pretty much the same as all the pictures you’ve seen of it and you can’t really get close enough to get an idea of the size of it. Worth doing, but place it nearer the bottom of your, “Gosh, I’ve always wanted to…” list.

So, we saw Mt. Rushmore, Ed and Dustin went up a chair lift and rode down a hill on rolling sled things (Derrick would have hated that), climbed around in a cave (Derrick REALLY would have hated that!) and watched some glass blowers.

Pretty tame stuff, really, but we had fun doing them. I learned several things. We can have fun and we can have fun doing stuff Derrick would never have done. We didn’t feel guilty, didn’t feel like it was somehow disloyal to do them now. There really wasn’t a gloomy little Derrick shaped shadow following us around, reminding us that we were supposed to be miserable. But here is the most important thing I learned.

Sorry, a little back-up is in order. On a day to day basis, I tend to do ok, if I am reasonably busy. The more time I have to think, the sadder I am. If I’m having a hard time because something has come up, or hit me in a certain way, it really will shadow my whole day. I’m just not busy enough in regular life to pull myself out of it.

Ok, so we’re at Mount Rushmore and it’s kinda cool, Ed and Dustin have gone wandering off, exploring a path and leaving me to hold our seats in the amphitheater for the evening show. So, I’ve got time on my hands, right? I started thinking about Derrick and how he’d wanted to come to Mt. Rushmore and I started to cry a bit. I actually considered stifling my tears because, really, I’m sitting here by myself and surrounded by strangers. But, you know what? My son is worth crying over, forget anyone else. Besides, if anyone were so forward as to ask me what I’m crying about, how horrible would they feel when given the explanation! So there!

No one paid the slightest bit of attention to me, I am sure, and I had my very sad 10-15 minutes. Ed and Dustin came back, the show started and I had a perfectly ok time (unfortunately, the show wasn’t terrific either).

So, I have also learned that given enough distraction, I can… I was going to say indulge, but I think the right word is respect… I can respect those moments of sadness, feel them, cry if I need to, and then I can move on with my day. This was a huge relief! There are very likely to be any number of things we will being doing and seeing on our cruise that Derrick would have really enjoyed. It’s nice to know I can have that good cry on the veranda, overlooking the ocean that Derrick never got the chance to see, without it ruining everything else. (and no, Derrick wouldn’t have walked out onto the veranda for a million dollars, but he sure would have liked the ocean).

 

[dicar123]

Mid-July

Ed and I had decided that although Dustin didn’t need a passport, we’d feel more comfortable if he had one. I’ve mentioned before that Dustin can be unbelievably uncurious about some things, but he’s hardly stupid. We’re probably going to need a lie, because even Dustin will ask why he needs a passport. He had just had a birthday, so I told him that because he was 9 now, he needed a passport. It’s the law.

Oddly, Dustin seemed slightly suspicious and also asked Ed. We had just taken Dustin’s first plane trip and he had noticed that Ed and I had to show ID to security. He asked where his ID was and we explained that he didn’t have one, but not to worry, the airplane people will take our word for your identity. So, Ed explained that if we wanted to take another airplane trip sometime, that he would have to have an official ID and that’s why he needed a passport. It worked.

One day while we were swimming, I asked Dustin if he could snorkel. We buy snorkel sets every summer because the kids all like to play with them. He said, “Yeah, a little.” “Hey,” I said, “Let’s practice and get really good and maybe dad will take us snorkeling sometime!” Cool idea Mom! So, we all practiced snorkeling. Dustin asked no questions. I love that child!

 

[dicar123]

September

Summer is over, school has started (the beginning not being nearly as hard as the end) and I’ve been kicking around ideas for the whole present thing. Dustin is 9. Going on a trip while doing away with presents completely simply won’t fly.

So, presents before, presents after or presents during? Ok, presents during the trip are a complete hassle and besides, the child will want nothing that he can use or play with while on our trip. He wants computer games, tanks, guns and a drum set (!!!). Buying him cool stuff while on the trip will still seem like cheating. Making him wait until after Christmas doesn’t seem quite right either.

However, opening Christmas presents on Thanksgiving Day could work nicely. It would be similar to Christmas, and we could even be outrageously silly and make him open them next to a giant turkey or something instead of a tree. This would also work for announcing the trip.

So, I approached my husband with this pseudo-plan. He rejects the idea. Christmas morning with no presents??!! We can ship things to ourselves, right? Oh, that will be such a HUGE hassle! Leave it to me, he says! I’ll take care of the whole thing, he says! I agree, very reluctantly, figuring that he’ll think about it awhile and come to the same conclusion I did.


October

I gingerly approach Ed. “Have you given anymore thought to the whole present thing?” He says, “Not really.” Ohmigosh, this is why I am always in charge!!

“Umm, honey, have you thought about the fact that Dustin will want computer games and stuff that he won’t be able to play with while on vacation?” Ed looks thoughtful, but doesn’t really respond. I consider adding that if we plan to open presents before vacation, the grandparents would probably like to have some advance notice, but I don’t want to push my luck.

I’m trying not to let this drive me crazy, but it is.

 

[dicar123]

Back in March we had bought our Universal passes and booked our hotel. I had checked rates at the hotels on-site, and I have to tell you, they were pricey. I got information on other hotels and presented all the information to Ed.

Now, Ed is a guy who likes convenience and he’s willing to pay for it. But the on-site hotels were twice as much as regular ones. Even he blinked a moment. Then he said, “Book it anyway. We don’t want to spend our vacation standing in lines and dealing with traffic.” So, I shuddered a bit, but I did it.


I’ve been checking out the Universal boards from time to time, and someone posted something about discount rates. I’m SO there! I checked the Royal Pacific Resort site and found the Super Saver rates with no trouble. Called the hotel, had them change my booking to the cheaper rate, saved $400. Yay me!

Then, I accidentally stumbled into a discussion on Annual Pass Holders rates. I had dismissed the idea of buying an annual pass because when I looked, I didn’t realize there were two different kinds and the one I saw was almost $300. But here were people talking about a cheaper one, and you only need to buy one to get the hotel discount.

Hmmm, so how do I find these extra special annual pass holder rates? Well, I couldn’t. So, I went back to the boards and found someone to help me. That very helpful person was catrinabeach and she was fantastic! Long story short, I booked the APH rate, we’ll pay to upgrade the passes when we get there. I went from $319 per night (total with taxes $1794) to $148 per night (total with taxes $832) plus $100 to upgrade one ticket. How great is that??!!

And now Ed is talking about trying to find one present for Dustin to open on Christmas Day. Yeah, good luck with that.


November

Now that Ed had come around to doing Christmas on Thanksgiving, I had things to do! I had to find the largest, tackiest turkey centerpiece on earth. I also had to decide how we were going to tell Dustin about the cruise.

I found the centerpiece, but it wasn’t nearly as large as I’d hoped. It did, however, come with two pumpkins, so, bonus there. I’d also found a cornucopia which would work very nicely as a stocking substitute.

I have to admit that when I revealed these plans to others they had one of two reactions. They either thought it was the most brilliant thing they’d ever heard, or they gave me a look that screamed “LUNATIC”. Ed was the only one in the middle saying, “IF you can pull this off, it will be great.” IF?? Oh please!

I had also decided to do a treasure hunt of sorts with Dustin for revealing the cruise. I had written clues that led to various places around the house where he would open a box and the present inside would give him more information about the trip.

Confession time: Dustin can be a bit dense. I was NOT subtle, I was not tricky, the whole thing was extremely straightforward. We also did not tell him that we were opening presents on Thanksgiving. I had planned for him to wake up and simply find the presents and a note from Santa explaining that he would be way too busy to come on Christmas Eve, so he brought the presents early. Plans set! Let’s go!!

 

[dicar123]

Thanksgiving

Ed and I woke up fairly early on Thanksgiving morning. Dustin is usually awake before us, but I guess he was sleeping in. Typically, the child wakes up, goes to the bathroom and then straight downstairs. The presents and whole set up were placed right in his path. When he didn’t wake up by 10:00, Ed thumped on his bedroom door and we scurried to our room. There we lay, watching TV, waiting for Dustin to get up and discover the presents!

Dustin woke up, came into our room, layed down on the bed and started chatting about Thanksgiving. I was calm for a minute or two, figuring he would certainly get up and go downstairs after a minute, but he didn’t. Ed sent him back to his room to get dressed. Dustin came back into our room. He went into the bathroom, and then came back to our room. I was loosing my mind! The child kept chatting and chatting and I couldn’t think of a plan. So, I escaped to the bathroom.

While there, I developed a brilliant plan! I would hide the toilet paper and ask Dustin to go downstairs and get me some! “Dustin,” I called, “Can you go get me some toilet paper?” The infuriating child came to the door and reminded me that there was toilet paper in the cabinet behind my head. “Oh, no. It’s all out!”

Off Dustin went, down the stairs. I waited for some expression of surprise and delight, but the house was surprisingly quiet. Finally, Dustin returned to the bathroom door. “Um, two things,” he said. “First, is this enough toilet paper?” He had brought me the last 2 sheets clinging to the cardboard roll-good thing this was just a ploy! “Second, I think the Turkey Gnomes were here.” Turkey Gnomes? I don’t know where that came from. Ed and I politely played along. Turkey Gnomes? Whatever can you mean? We all trooped downstairs.

“Oh look, Dustin, there is a note from Santa!” He was neither surprised nor offended that Santa was too busy to visit him on Christmas Eve. Like I’ve said, the kid is pretty accepting. He’d gotten presents, the why’s and how’s didn’t matter much.

We commenced with present opening and Dustin was quite happy with the gifts he received. When that was finished, and he’d cleared up the wrapping paper, I explained that he had one more present, but that I had made it a game. I explained the rules: 1. No running (I was video taping the event), 2. Open boxes before envelopes and 3. You must read the clues aloud (video taping, you know)

Dustin eyed me suspiciously, but agreed. The first clue explained that he had one more present and he had to follow the clues to find out what it was. In the first box was an airplane. The clue with it said clearly that we are taking a trip. The second box contained a puzzle piece of Florida. Like I said, I wasn’t going for subtle.

Upon seeing the Florida piece, Dustin asked, “Does this mean anything?” Ed said, “Yes.” I just giggled, quite pleased with myself. A bathtub toy pirate ship was in the next box, with Disney Magic written on its side. The following box contained an advertisement for the Disney Magic and the clue said, “We’re cruising with Mickey!” I really couldn’t have been more clear, but Dustin was clueless.

I commented on his lack of excitement, and he said, “Oh, at the end, there will probably be $20 or something.” I must insert here that Dustin and a cousin had played a rather similar game at my parents’ house a month earlier and had found $20 each at the end.

So, we went on, finding small Shrek and Spiderman toys, and an advertisement for Universal Studios (which, as I suspected, Dustin knew nothing about, despite many hours of Nickelodeon watching). The almost final clue told him to go to the calendar to see when we leave.

On the calendar, December 14th was circled in bright pink highlighter, and upon it was written the words, “Leaving On Vacation”. I had also circled the 27th and had written “Coming Home From Vacation”. The last clue explained that if he looked carefully, he would see that he was going to miss 4 days of school (surely the most exciting part of the whole thing for Dustin).

It was at this point, that light finally dawned…kind of. “We’re going on vacation?” he asked. “Where are we going?” I started sputtering in frustration. Ed, however, had laid all the clues and various items out, in order, on the floor and drug the child over to explain it step by step. “Ok, Dustin, we’re getting on an airplane, and going… “


“Oh, we’re going to Florida,” Dustin says, with some excitement. “Yes, and when we get there we will get on the Disney Boat. Then we will come back to Florida and go to Universal Studios for a few days and then we will come home.”

I began to explain the dates. “We are leaving on the 14th, and not coming home until after Christmas.” “Oh,” Dustin says. “How will I get my Christmas presents?” Oh, good grief! Child you JUST opened your Christmas presents!

I was assured later, after sharing the clues and such with family and friends, that I had been remarkably clear, and rather brilliant in the execution of this plan. We concluded that the whole thing was so far out of Dustin’s range of experience that it just had made no sense to him at all. Well, either that, or he’d be living under adult supervision his whole life.

Dustin’s non-excitement continued. He had no interest in watching the planning video, asked very few questions and responded with minimal interest when we discussed the trip. It wasn’t long before my excitement dimmed as well.

 

[dicar123]

December

The month I had been looking to with dread for an entire year. Where before, thinking about this trip had been a nice way to escape sad thoughts, the reality of it only focused my thoughts on the reason for it. If the trip was coming closer, the anniversary of Derrick’s death was coming closer too.

The two were linked in my mind and I suddenly wanted to avoid all things vacation related. Luckily, this lasted only until it was time to start packing! I’d decided to not work at all the week of the trip (we were leaving on a Thursday) and spent that time organizing our stuff and cleaning the house, so I wouldn’t come home to a mess.

Here is our itinerary:

December 14: pick up by airport shuttle, early flight to Orlando, rental car, staying at the Country Inn and Suites, Port Canaveral.
December 15-22: Cruise
December 22-27: Return from cruise, rental car, staying at Royal Pacific Resorts (a Universal hotel), Universal Studios for some unknown amount of time, perhaps other stuff we hadn’t decided yet.

Cast of Characters:

Dianna- me, gaining a reputation in my family for excellence in vacation planning. But it’s early days yet and one bad trip could ruin me

Ed- my wonderful husband, happy to leave the planning to someone else, says, “Just tell me when to show up,” and pays the bills without comment.

Dustin- 9 years old, extremely friendly, adventurous eater. Not terribly excited about the trip, but he does live very “in the moment”

Derrick Evan- the ghost of Christmas past. He makes a couple of brief “appearances”-but not in any literal sense, I assure you!

Ready? Here we goooooo!

 

[wendym]

I know this will probably come out wrong but can I just say I think you did exactly the right thing and it is what Derrick would want. Well done for being brave enough to do it.
Wendy

 

[alwayslisad]

Dianna - first off - my thoughts and prayers to you on the loss of your child. I can not imagine what you are going through but I send you internet HUGS and Tears.... Your story is amazing - I cried and laughed and saved it to my fave's so I can re-read --- the Gnomes had me laughing through my tears.

My best friend lost her son 7 years ago. He was murdered. Two boys knocked him off his bike and killed him for it. Although I do not know your pain of a Mom's loss. I do know the pain of a best friends loss.



I can not wait to read the rest!!!!!

Keep up the amazing work and faith!

 

[dicar123]

wendym- Funny thing about grief, no one every really knows what to say or how to say it. Even funnier, the grieving people don't have a clue either! LOL! So we all just muddle along.

Deciding to take this trip is the BEST decision I have EVER made. It was exactly the right thing at the right time. Thanks!

alwayslisad- For the life of me, I don't know where Turkey Gnomes came from! Thanks so much for your hugs, I'll take all that I can get! I'm so sorry about your friend's son. What a scary place the world is sometimes! Our friends have been through every bit of this with us. We couldn't have gotten by without them. So, know that you've been a tremendous blessing for your friend.

More soon! I'm currently trying to figure out how to post my pics from shutterfly. Can't find that IMG code anywhere!

 

[alwayslisad]

If it would not be too painful I would love to see a picture of your Angel as well.

 

[KimAshton]

I have to give you a great big hug. My younger brother died unexpectly on December 20, 2003 and I know how hard it is being around Christmas. ((HUGS))

 

[LovableGluttons]

Dianna, I'm climbing aboard with your report too!

I love your flair! Derrick sure was a lucky kid to get to spend 14 years with a Mom as neat as you are.

And, yes, it comes through loud and clear in your writing.

Keep going!

 

[miztigg]

 

[dicar123]

The leavings of the infamous Turkey Gnomes!

 

[firemans wife]

Great start! Can't wait to read more

 

[alwayslisad]

Fantastic Pic - LOVE THE turkey and pumpkins - but I don't see gnomes....ooohhh wait......they delivered it......aahhhh finally GOT IT..... instead of Santa and elves it was the Turkey and the Gnomes.....

Phew....