The NEW Official November 2010 Countdown & Planning Thread ~ Come join us! (Part 1)

[SlightlyGoofy]

sjs314, two of my grandchildren are nearly grown and I have four others that I do not see so I feel your pain. What I do is I volunteer to work with kids. Unfortunately there is no shortage of children who need someone just like you in their lives. Reading Buddies at a school is a wonderful program. If you are artistic you could do a program on that. Volunteer at your church with children. There are endless opportunities. I love it when school starts because that means I get to see all MY children again.

sjs314 , see I am not the only person who would like to know about your son. Please share. It will do us all some good and I would love to 'meet' him and wish I had had the opportunity before.

Trackey79, you might well find out that you like camping far more than the trip you had already planned. It is likely to keep you together as a family even more too. I forget when you are going but if it is around the holiday season there are many reports of the decorations over in that area. I would love to see them myself.

Slightly Goofy

 

[sjs314]

don't feel embarrassed.. I can't even imagine.. in fact like a PP said, we would love to hear all about him..

sjs314 , see I am not the only person who would like to know about your son. Please share. It will do us all some good and I would love to 'meet' him and wish I had had the opportunity before.

Slightly Goofy

I will warn you this is a bit long but you asked

My DS Jason was my DH and my pride and joy from the moment he was born. It took us 5 years to concieve him so there were 10yrs between Jason and his older brother. He was such a bright and intelligent child playing sports not very good in basketball but he tried, he shined in little league was the star catcher, I have a shelf of trophies in high school he went out for and played football but that just was not his game.

Scouts and saxiphone took up much of his time too during his yournger years.
Everything was good until his senior year in HS, turned out he was missing a couple of credits and would need to go to summer school and not graduate with his class. My son was not accustumed to losing and he did not handle it well , he walked out of school, he was 18 and working anyway so he just said he would work full time and get his GED, it was a useless battle to argue.

All was good he even bought a brand new car and then I don't know he became mixed up with some wrong friends when he was 21 and he started drinking and drugs

He went thru rehab and was clean then about 5 years ago he met his wife and moved in with her, December of 2008 they were married and he also started a new job that month with the Post Office Life was good again.

Then late January the job at the PO ended , he went back to his previous job but that place closed up, he was collecting unemployment but seemed fine, we all went to Disney March of 2009 even after we came home things seemed normal.

Fourth of July my older DS and wife had a cookout, I did not go but everyone said Jay was fine, the last day I saw him the sunday before he died he seemed ok, I spoke with him on the phone later that night and he was good.

I will never know what happened to drive him back to his old demons, My Ddil
came home for lunch then went back to work, she tried to call him later but he did not answer his phone, when she arrived home at 4 pm the bathroom door was locked. She called 911 but it was too late he was non responsive and pronounced DOA at the hospital. The autopsy showed morphine overdose
We all thought he was clean and he did not confide in any of us, I constantly wonder if there were signs that I missed but I will never know what drove him back to the drugs, we feel it was accidential that he was just trying to escape life for a bit but ended up leaving the ones he loved instead

July 15th was a year since he died and this coming Sat Aug 21 would have been his 31st Birthday

 

[cyndiloveswalt]

Wow, that is quite a story. I am very sorry for you and your family. I can't even imagine your pain and am sure the anniversaries are worse. I hope you make it through Saturday by thinking of the good times you had and all the good memories. Hopefully your Disney trip as a family will help with your healing also.

 

[DisneyBoundinDec]

I am so so so sorry.. and thank you for sharing your story. I think we all look back and think of all the "signs" we should have seen. While I have not lost a child, I have lost 2 friends to drug overdoses. Its such a sad sad tragic thing. I will be praying for you on Saturday.. may you get through it with some tears of happiness as you remember him.

 

[sjs314]

Wow, that is quite a story. I am very sorry for you and your family. I can't even imagine your pain and am sure the anniversaries are worse. I hope you make it through Saturday by thinking of the good times you had and all the good memories. Hopefully your Disney trip as a family will help with your healing also.

I am so so so sorry.. and thank you for sharing your story. I think we all look back and think of all the "signs" we should have seen. While I have not lost a child, I have lost 2 friends to drug overdoses. Its such a sad sad tragic thing. I will be praying for you on Saturday.. may you get through it with some tears of happiness as you remember him.

Thank You Both

 

[Disney Mommy 3]

Oh Sheila~ I am so sorry! I know it must be hard as a mom to think you missed something that would have given you an idea...but I think he was probably doing a good job of keeping it from all of you...thank you for sharing about him with us...I hope it helped you a little to talk about it! We will be thinking of you Sat and praying for you!!

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

Sheila, honey it is even sadder than I had imagined. It is not drugs in my case but I have some problems with my son as well and I know the heartache of not being able to help those we love. It is so evident that you and your husband gave Jason a good life but one never knows what goes on in another person's heart and what pain, physical or mental, they are feeling. I am sure he struggled mightily to stay but in one moment it slipped away from him.

I am hoping that you can feel his love that I am sure he sends your way daily and know that the only person you can control is yourself and not always that. I know that he knows that his family loved him too but sometimes that is just not enough to keep from self destruction. Some folks are afflicted and some escape the grip of such things. Some day we will know why but we do not know yet.

It is not your fault. It is not Jason's fault. Life is difficult and more so for some than others.

I hope that talking eases your pain a tiny bit and we are glad that you were able to share with us and let us get to know your Jason, your beloved son.

SG/Linda (mom and grandma)

 

[sjs314]

Oh Sheila~ I am so sorry! I know it must be hard as a mom to think you missed something that would have given you an idea...but I think he was probably doing a good job of keeping it from all of you...thank you for sharing about him with us...I hope it helped you a little to talk about it! We will be thinking of you Sat and praying for you!!

Thank You Shawna

Sheila, honey it is even sadder than I had imagined. It is not drugs in my case but I have some problems with my son as well and I know the heartache of not being able to help those we love. It is so evident that you and your husband gave Jason a good life but one never knows what goes on in another person's heart and what pain, physical or mental, they are feeling. I am sure he struggled mightily to stay but in one moment it slipped away from him.

I am hoping that you can feel his love that I am sure he sends your way daily and know that the only person you can control is yourself and not always that. I know that he knows that his family loved him too but sometimes that is just not enough to keep from self destruction. Some folks are afflicted and some escape the grip of such things. Some day we will know why but we do not know yet.

It is not your fault. It is not Jason's fault. Life is difficult and more so for some than others.

I hope that talking eases your pain a tiny bit and we are glad that you were able to share with us and let us get to know your Jason, your beloved son.

SG/Linda (mom and grandma)

Thank You Linda, I hope your son reaches out to you, it is so hard not to keep going over everything you have said or done and even harder not to put the blame on ourselves at times whether or not it is justified.

When my DS passed away we all said we would never be able to go to WDW again, then one day I was sitting thinking and talking to my DS like I do constantly(my dog thinks I am nuts) and I felt as if he wanted us to make a trip at Christmastime, something we had talked of for years but never could do to work schedules, DH said he would go so we booked it, I plan on letting a balloon loose near Jason's favorite ride Splash Mt, so if you see a old woman walking around crying for no reason it just might be me, I know this is going to be a very emotional trip. Ddil had a family gathering in March at WDW and she told me she could not even go by Splash Mt and how she broke down and cried in Epcot when she passed where we had at the previous year.

I just take one day at a time now, some are good and some are not so good

Sheila

 

[Trackey79]

don't feel embarrassed.. I can't even imagine.. in fact like a PP said, we would love to hear all about him..



I am glad that you have it all figured out! Camping actually sounds really cool! and it will be nice and cool out too, can't beat the weather!

Thanks and I so happy we got it worked out as well. Hehe, I'm counting on that weather being just right too, so I may be requesting prayers that we have good weather that week, once we get closer.

 

[Trackey79]

Trackey79, you might well find out that you like camping far more than the trip you had already planned. It is likely to keep you together as a family even more too. I forget when you are going but if it is around the holiday season there are many reports of the decorations over in that area. I would love to see them myself.

Slightly Goofy

I am quite sure we will have a wonderful time camping. My only worry with it, is rain. As long as that stays away I'm not concerned. We camped there back in 2007 for Veteran's day week and the decorations are quite good. What is really neat is that a lot of the campers will decorate their campsites as well. We rented a gold cart last time and drove around one night just to look at everyone's decorations. It was fun!

 

[Trackey79]

I will warn you this is a bit long but you asked

My DS Jason was my DH and my pride and joy from the moment he was born. It took us 5 years to concieve him so there were 10yrs between Jason and his older brother. He was such a bright and intelligent child playing sports not very good in basketball but he tried, he shined in little league was the star catcher, I have a shelf of trophies in high school he went out for and played football but that just was not his game.

Scouts and saxiphone took up much of his time too during his yournger years.
Everything was good until his senior year in HS, turned out he was missing a couple of credits and would need to go to summer school and not graduate with his class. My son was not accustumed to losing and he did not handle it well , he walked out of school, he was 18 and working anyway so he just said he would work full time and get his GED, it was a useless battle to argue.

All was good he even bought a brand new car and then I don't know he became mixed up with some wrong friends when he was 21 and he started drinking and drugs

He went thru rehab and was clean then about 5 years ago he met his wife and moved in with her, December of 2008 they were married and he also started a new job that month with the Post Office Life was good again.

Then late January the job at the PO ended , he went back to his previous job but that place closed up, he was collecting unemployment but seemed fine, we all went to Disney March of 2009 even after we came home things seemed normal.

Fourth of July my older DS and wife had a cookout, I did not go but everyone said Jay was fine, the last day I saw him the sunday before he died he seemed ok, I spoke with him on the phone later that night and he was good.

I will never know what happened to drive him back to his old demons, My Ddil
came home for lunch then went back to work, she tried to call him later but he did not answer his phone, when she arrived home at 4 pm the bathroom door was locked. She called 911 but it was too late he was non responsive and pronounced DOA at the hospital. The autopsy showed morphine overdose
We all thought he was clean and he did not confide in any of us, I constantly wonder if there were signs that I missed but I will never know what drove him back to the drugs, we feel it was accidential that he was just trying to escape life for a bit but ended up leaving the ones he loved instead

July 15th was a year since he died and this coming Sat Aug 21 would have been his 31st Birthday

I am so sorry!! I cannot even begin to imagine what it feels like to lose a child. Please know you will all be in my prayers!

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

Sheila, my son reached out this Saturday, after 8 years, but it was to get something and ask for something he did not get. I constantly remind myself that no matter how bad it is it could be worse, as in your situation. I just keep hanging in there.

If you are there when I am I would love to give you a hug and get to know you better. I think your idea is lovely. I know another DIS family who were in a wreck shortly after returning from a Disney vacation and their little boy did not make it. Some folks,who do not get it, could not understand why they would ever return but I understood. There are so many happy memories of time spent there together and I know that while the tears will come to you so will the happy memories. Maybe this is his way of comforting you. BTW, the family I spoke of just had a baby boy. No replacement but a comfort.

Trackey79, it is pretty dry that time of year and if you are under trees and such and have a good tent you should be fine. Do you camp often? I would love to see all those decorations but getting my husband over there and renting a golf cart, I have never driven one, might be more than I can manage. I have watched them on Youtube. Did you know you can get on there and see any Disney attraction/ride that you wish? I do it on those cold Indiana days.

Slightly Goofy

 

[Trackey79]

Thank You Shawna

Thank You Linda, I hope your son reaches out to you, it is so hard not to keep going over everything you have said or done and even harder not to put the blame on ourselves at times whether or not it is justified.

When my DS passed away we all said we would never be able to go to WDW again, then one day I was sitting thinking and talking to my DS like I do constantly(my dog thinks I am nuts) and I felt as if he wanted us to make a trip at Christmastime, something we had talked of for years but never could do to work schedules, DH said he would go so we booked it, I plan on letting a balloon loose near Jason's favorite ride Splash Mt, so if you see a old woman walking around crying for no reason it just might be me, I know this is going to be a very emotional trip. Ddil had a family gathering in March at WDW and she told me she could not even go by Splash Mt and how she broke down and cried in Epcot when she passed where we had at the previous year.

I just take one day at a time now, some are good and some are not so good

Sheila

If you need some support when you go to release that balloon let me know and we can swing by and lend you a shoulder to lean on.

We are taking this trip at this time so that I can try not think about the anniversary of my Mom passing, but I know that won't really happen. There is nothing that will make me forget that date, so my only hope is that the magic of Disney can make that day a little more bearible. I hope it does the same for you.

 

[Trackey79]

Trackey79, it is pretty dry that time of year and if you are under trees and such and have a good tent you should be fine. Do you camp often? I would love to see all those decorations but getting my husband over there and renting a golf cart, I have never driven one, might be more than I can manage. I have watched them on Youtube. Did you know you can get on there and see any Disney attraction/ride that you wish? I do it on those cold Indiana days.

Slightly Goofy

We have camped several times now with all four kids and we enjoy it quite a bit. I am requesting a site nears the woods this time, so with any luck we will get one. You should try to convince your hubby. Driving a golf cart is easy and you could always go do the hoop dee doo review while you are there.

 

[NOLAdisneymom]

Hello, November group!

We will be at Caribbean Beach from November 20th to 25th!

It will be me (33), my DH (39), his son, DSS, (17), and DSS's GF (18).

We are super excited bc....

1. We got the dining plan for FREE! We've never used it before, so I'm a bit nervous about how it all works. We have ressies at Chef Mickey's for breakfast, Ohana for dinner, Sci-Fi and Coral Reef for lunch, Rainforest OOP just for the nachos and a dinner at Chefs de France, for just myself and DH.

2. It's DSS's first trip to Disney World!! ( I know, I know, HOW is this possible?)

If anyone has suggestions on how to make his first time more magical, please share!!

 

[Momof2Disneyboys]

Good morning November friends!

NOLAdisneymom ~

Trackey79 ~ Congrats on getting your plans all worked out - sounds like it will be a fun time!


Sheila ~ Wow that is quite a story. I'm so glad you shared and I hope it made you feel a little bit better by doing so. I can't imagine what you and your family are going through. You will all be in my prayers tomorrow.

 

[SlightlyGoofy]

Trackey79, my husband is autistic as well as possibly senile now and I have to make sure he is well rested and keep things simple. New things do not work well as I have health problems too and it is difficult to do new things without any errors and keep him calm. He is much older than I am. Maybe you can post a Youtube video of the decorations when you are there?

it is so hard not to keep going over everything you have said or done and even harder not to put the blame on ourselves at times whether or not it is justified.

sjs314, you summed it up perfectly. Has been going on so many years now that I have come to the conclusion that I did the best I could under the circumstances and sometimes it is the child's fault. In his case I think he knows he is wrong and is looking for excuses. Such a stupid waste of time IMO. Forget , forgive and move on. I hope.

NOLAdisneymom, shhhh, do not tell this to the world. They will be coming after you for child abuse for not taking your children before this. Our children were preteens before they got to go but since I was in my 30's myself at the time they were luckier than I. They laughed at me walking around wide eyed and all. Looks like you have a great start on a perfect vacation. I would just plan to let the young ones go off on their own here and there and make plans to meet up here and there and everyone will get to do what they want and all will be happy. Cell phones are such a wonderful thing in the parks. There is so much great information on the DIS and if you check the right forums you will garner more good information than you can conceive of. Check out the menus, resort info, and park information as well as live show times and make a loose plan, one that you can tweak as you see fit. Have a blast!

Slightly Goofy

 

[NOLAdisneymom]

NOLAdisneymom, shhhh, do not tell this to the world. They will be coming after you for child abuse for not taking your children before this. Our children were preteens before they got to go but since I was in my 30's myself at the time they were luckier than I. They laughed at me walking around wide eyed and all. Looks like you have a great start on a perfect vacation. I would just plan to let the young ones go off on their own here and there and make plans to meet up here and there and everyone will get to do what they want and all will be happy. Cell phones are such a wonderful thing in the parks. There is so much great information on the DIS and if you check the right forums you will garner more good information than you can conceive of. Check out the menus, resort info, and park information as well as live show times and make a loose plan, one that you can tweak as you see fit. Have a blast!

Slightly Goofy[/QUOTE]


It's not my fault, LOL, had he been born to ME, he would have gone WAAAAYYY before now! His girlfriend is a Disney regular, so she is MORE than excited to show him around! 91 days to go!

 

[Trackey79]

Good morning November friends!

NOLAdisneymom ~

Trackey79 ~ Congrats on getting your plans all worked out - sounds like it will be a fun time!


Sheila ~ Wow that is quite a story. I'm so glad you shared and I hope it made you feel a little bit better by doing so. I can't imagine what you and your family are going through. You will all be in my prayers tomorrow.

Thanks!

 

[Trackey79]

Trackey79, my husband is autistic as well as possibly senile now and I have to make sure he is well rested and keep things simple. New things do not work well as I have health problems too and it is difficult to do new things without any errors and keep him calm. He is much older than I am. Maybe you can post a Youtube video of the decorations when you are there?

Slightly Goofy

I understand. With issues like that I can definitely see why you need to keep a good schedule. I will see what I can do about getting a video and posting it for all those who can't get over there to see.