The Meanest Mother in the World--A L-B TR, 5/05 *DONE. p.65, with one last pic*

[flipflop]

The story about pooh, piglet and piper got me a little misty-eyed. How cute!
I hope you had a happy birthday and that you get back to typing a new installment soon.

 

[BostonTink85]

great update!!! I love how the characters took time to play with Piper..how precious. Can't wait for more!!!

oh and happy belated birthday!

 

[magicmama]

Happy Birthday Kim!!



I realize you're busy being a mean mom.....
can't wait much longer!!!!

 

[toony]

Hallo to you very good-hearted mean mama. Just found your trip report. I'm so hooked. Great work!

Kiddies (and especially yours) are so amusing, cute and touching characters of a story. There are too many funny moments to quote here.

hmmm, maybe i like the one with the princess playground best.

It's July. So don't let us wait too long, please!

 

[toony]

and...
subsequent brithday greetings from me!

 

[kpk89]

Thanks, everyone, for the birthday greetings. It is still "BirthWeek" for me. Haven't relinquished the "it's my birthday, you must obey my every whim" card yet.

We just got back from swimming, and I was reminded of a silly little vignette that I had forgotten to include from our trip. I could have just posted it here, but I have a thing about sequential order. (that's why I'm writing this report, after all, instead of the one from our January trip which had recently concluded when I began this epic. It's gotta be in order!!)

So I went back and edited. Visit page 21, and look for the red. That's the new part. Don't get too all excited, it's just a silly little poolside story, but this story is for my family, and this is SOOO typical. Of us. So it goes in the report.

And for those of you just joining us, now you know why there was a bunch of red writing on page 21.

I'm working on the next chapter, and hope to have it up by early next week. Holiday, you know. Until then, enjoy!

 

[Turtle]

And then commenced the legendary Search for Conor's FlipFlops.

Because in his excitement at getting to the pool, he didn't pay any attention to where he kicked them. And in our concern to not have him dive headlong into the deep end, we didn't notice, either. So while Doug took the kids and went to ask the lifeguard if there was a lost & found, I skirted the perimeter. Aha! I see them! But are they? Really? They're in a little pile of shoes at another family's "camp." And there's nobody nearby. Do I just take them? What if they're NOT his? I feel like I'm in a Seinfeld episode. As I stand there and stare at the shoes, willing them to jump up and reveal their true identity, a woman about 15 feet away sits up from her lounging and asks, "Um, can I help you?" I explain my conundrum, and she proceeds to wave one of the flipflops in the air and yell, (YELL!) to her friend in the pool, "Hey! Does this belong to ___________ (insert name of boy child here)?"

It did not. The friend in the pool gave her blessing for me to rummage through their family shoe-pile for the other flipflop, and I took them both gratefully. By this time, Doug and the kids had made their way back to me. The kids had determined that they'd like to keep swimming. I wanted to be away from the pool and all those people that now know I can't keep track of basic footwear.

.

I just had to comment, hopefully I'm doing it right. I LOVE your story. I'm doing things like this all the time, where I'm not sure what to do, and don't want to speak up So you're not alone!

 

[kpk89]

Welcome, Turtle. I'm honored that your first post was here. Thank you! I have another chapter or 2 coming up soon.

 

[Lisa_Belle]

Enjoyed the "addition" to your report. Happy belated birthday. Hope all your Disney wishes come true.

 

[disneyeveryyear]

Kim,

I just found your report tonight and read the whole thing!!!

I am not letting my children read your report because they believe that I am the meanest mom in the world. I have even explained to them what MOM stands for:

Mean
Old
Mom

See?

Loving your TR and waiting for more.

 

[Turtle]

Thanks Kim!

 

[zacksmammie]

Great report. Hate having to wait for the next installment - but the anticipation makes it worthwhile. You have a great writing style--very entertaining and easy to read!..keep them coming please???

 

[kpk89]

Okay, zacksmammie! Coming right up!

Don't expect this kind of rapid response -- on a HOLIDAY no less -- on a regular basis! Just ask anyone around here. I am sloooooooow.

And, jambo! Welcome, too!

 

[kpk89]

The day is definitely getting away from us. We (okay, I) had hoped to get in a little freshening up time and relaxation before our PS at 1900 Park Fare. We’re looking a little hot (in the sweaty, grimy, way, not the Paris Hilton way) and bedraggled.

However, there is one more stop that mustn’t be missed. Soarin’. We’ll have to let Cinderella see our grimy side. She’ll understand. She’s been there, done that.

Fastpasses in hand, we park the double ride amid the herd of strollers at the entrance of the Land.

Can I just say … Fastpasses are a total Fastpass!! This was our first experience using them. Last time we were at Disney there was no such thing. And yesterday at Animal Kingdom there was no need. We sort of got to do a double Fastpass-ish thing. Because Sydneyralla is too little to ride Soarin’. So at the entrance we inquire about the special kid-switch ticket. Admit one mama, and anyone else who wants to and is tall enough to join her, through the Fastpass line. All I have to do is wait for Doug and the big-enough kids to come out. This sounds like a good plan.

So we exchange Sydney for the magic ticket, and the rest of the group takes off. Just kidding - - they didn’t get to keep Sydney, they just needed to see her. Otherwise, any schmo could go up to the CM and say they need a kid-switch pass.

Off they go, leaving Syd and I to amuse ourselves. Said entertainment included a diaper change. By the time that was done, there wasn’t time to do much but lurk near the exit and wait for our party. Good times playing a little hide and seek amongst the Fastpass machines.

When the rest of the KpKrew emerges, they are nothing but big fat grins with feet. And the feet are skipping and prancing. I can’t wait for my turn! I turn Sydneyralla over to Daddy, and they head over to the food court area for a beer and snack. Criminy, the child’s not large enough to ride Soarin’, but they’ll give her a beer? Heh heh. And how is it that I got stuck with the diaper change, and Daddy gets the “relax with your beautiful daughter and a cold frosty beverage” card? Methinks the Mean Mama is losing her touch.

Conorboy, PiperPower and I go zooming down the Fastpass lane with our magic ticket. Feeling like royalty, or superheroes. Superhero royalty even. Because the standby line is 90 minutes. Not moving. We glide on past all the rabble, and they cast pitiful, sad glances in our direction. They feel low. Like the dirt on the bottom of worms’ feet.

Have you ever wondered how to tell which end of a worm is the head? Piper did. Her pronouncement: “If you know where they’re going, then you know where their heads are!” Think about it.

So the standby peons are looking pretty morose, and PiperPower blithely throws some salt in their wounds by bubbling, “Mommy this is so much fun! I’m so happy we get to go on it AGAIN!”

I feel pretty badly for the folks standing there, packed in like so many sardines. The queue theming is … how do I put this? Sparse. That’s the word I’ll go with because it sounds more objective than the other words I considered, like “lame,” and “pathetic.”

That may actually be unfair. Maybe it’s only the FastPass queue that’s like that.

Maybe the standby queue is totally, elaborately, and thoroughly entertaining.

I wouldn’t know. Bwa hahahahahahaha!

At last! Some pre-show action! Puddy (gosh I’m sure this man has a real name, but to me he’ll always be Puddy. That chimp’s alright. High-five.) prepares us for our journey. We enter, and are seated in the middle row on the left side.

Wow. What a ride! Innovative and beautiful. Thrilling, but gently so. I keep sneaking peeks at my babies’ faces, and they are enraptured. Laughter and squeals of delight pepper the air. My arms begin aching from holding them out to my sides, holding the kids in. I know they are securely fastened, but it’s the mom instinct. Truth be told, I had a touch of a little feeling I call “I think I’m going to fall out!”

Previous occurrences of this feeling: on the chairlifts at Breckenridge, Keystone, and Copper. Here in the east we provide safety bars for our chairlift riders. Apparently Coloradans are more adventurous or less hospitable. The other prior experience with this sensation was AstroGut. Intro to Astronomy, first year in college. I always arrived late, and always slunk into a back / top row seat of the amphitheater. The professor stood at the bottom. Then he kept on turning out the lights to show slides and such. And I kept falling asleep, only to experience that “falling” sensation and awaken with a start to find that I was still safely in my seat. Around Halloween, I gave up and stopped going. The first “C” I ever received. It's not a fun feeling, but the exhilaration of Soarin' far outweighed the fear of slipping off my hangglider into oblivion.

Anyway, we have a blast soaring over California. We feel the music in our guts, swelling out to fill us. Again. Love the Disney music. We kick up our feet whenever our glider dips low over the treetops or river kayakers. We inhale deeply the scent of oranges and pine forests. We do our best to ignore the dangling feet above us – that’s the one tiny little caveat of this phenomenal ride. Do try to get the back row if you can. Or is it the front row? I can’t remember. But know this: in the middle, you’ll see feet. In the front or back row you at least have a 50/50 shot at NOT seeing feet. We feel the breeze on our faces, and gasp as Sleeping Beauty Castle comes into view.

I’m so happy we did this instead of opting for baths and clean clothes this afternoon. Cinderella will understand, I’m certain of it.

 

[zacksmammie]

Thanks (and a belated Happy 4th!)

 

[mom2cookies]

i love your report posts. And if anyone wants to know... front row does not have a view of dangling feet!. I,of course, rode Soarin' with my eyes closed concentrating hard on my "happy place" ( i am terribly afraid of heights but promised the kids i'd ride) How do i know front row does not have dangling feet? because I PEEKED 2 times!.

 

[ead79]

Another great installment! Soarin' really is wonderful--thanks for taking me back there through your report.

 

[scrapbookersdis]

... they are nothing but big fat grins with feet.

Hey, you can grow your own big fat grin with feet on postopia.com!

(Like the guys in the Honeycomb cereal commercials.)

postopia.com/bigmouthlife/index.aspx?driver=globalnav

Great update, as usual.

Sharla

 

[MagicMe]

Another great installment Keep them coming!!!

 

[aspcamhreditor2]

Part 7 – Hold the Express, We’ll just Take the Magic

But seriously. As much as I adore the DIS, and have found it to be ever so fun and useful, the thing that dismays me is the unrealistic inflation of expectations that it sometimes causes. Just find yourself a thread about towel animals, or lack thereof, and you’ll get what I mean.

I love it when people share the magical experiences that they’ve had. What is a drag is when other people come to expect that they’ll have the exact same thing happen to them, and that their trip is “ruined” or they didn’t get their “money’s worth” if it doesn’t. Or when they try so hard to “make” the magic happen, that it takes the fun out of it.

Kim, you are my hero. You summarized my thoughts & feelings perfectly. Excellent trip report. Should be working but I just can't stop myself from reading. one more page ... just one more page, ya, ya, then I'll go back to work.

Glad I've not been tuning into the boards much lately. Lucky me ... I get to read several of your reports at once. I might not have dealt with reading these as you posted them in real time!