tell me... am I wrong in thinking this?

[Cinderella2006]

This is a difficult one! My mum could not wait to be a grandmother but in no way did she preach!
I met my husband just after my 17th birthday, had our first child when I was 19, now I think that is young but it was what I wanted, we had our own house, good jobs etc.


My mum always used to ask me when we were going to have children, this may sound odd as I was only 18 at the time but I think it was my mum’s way of correcting what she did wrong with me (to cut a long story short I lived with relatives).
My mum loves my son to bits and everyone comments on how nice it is to see the way she treats my son and how different she is in herself since I have had my first child.

Although what this woman wants for her child is not what most of us would want for our children (me included) maybe there is an underlying problem which is why the woman is acting like this. Some people want to live there life through their children.

Midlife crisis!?

I am sure the girl will do what is best for her and it sounds like the dad is more down to earth.

 

[angel659]

HHHmmmm sounds very strange to me. I take it that her mum is a home mum (no offence intended) I see it happening at work. Some patients talk about wanting to be a nanny and they hope thier child has kids soon. Expecting the child to walk in at visiting time being in thier late 20's they way they spoke. Nope they come in thier school uniform Sometimes it makes me wonder.

I really dont want Casey to have kids young. For me personally I feel as though I had my kids too young. I love them to bits I really do. I have always wanted to go travelling, but I fell pregant when I was 20. The travelling plans stopped and we started our family. Dont get me wrong I love them to bits and would not change it. I do sometimes feel that I wish I let my hair down a little. My parents were so strict it was stupid. I was so scared about leaving home, going clubbing etc. It stopped me doing alot of things. I only left home when I was pregnant. I feel I didnt really lived my life when I was younger. Hence why now all I want to do is go out and my friends here have done that and now all they want to do is settle down.

My life encouragement is to follow your dreams. Do what you want to do. Dont be scared to talk to me about what you want to do. I will have no particular pressure on my dd at all. Its her life and I will support her in what she decides. I will say live first before being a mum. Why this mum is encouraging her to have kids as early as possible is beyond me

For her career choice. Perhaps a teaching assistant is an easier route to get into first I dont know. This is something I am looking into at the moment.

Your not wrong Carol for thinking this at all.

 

[Goofysmate]

What is wrong with some parents ??????????
I would dearly love granchildren & i know i would make a fantastic granny (sorry for blowing my own trumpet but i know i would).
But it's up to my son & his partner to decide when the time is ready and as a mother i want my son to enjoy some life & the world before having children as life does change once you have them, even though they are a blessing
So i'm with you on this one Carol

 

[PoppyAnna]

This is a difficult one! My mum could not wait to be a grandmother but in no way did she preach!
I met my husband just after my 17th birthday, had our first child when I was 19, now I think that is young but it was what I wanted, we had our own house, good jobs etc.


My mum always used to ask me when we were going to have children, this may sound odd as I was only 18 at the time but I think it was my mum’s way of correcting what she did wrong with me (to cut a long story short I lived with relatives).
My mum loves my son to bits and everyone comments on how nice it is to see the way she treats my son and how different she is in herself since I have had my first child.

Although what this woman wants for her child is not what most of us would want for our children (me included) maybe there is an underlying problem which is why the woman is acting like this. Some people want to live there life through their children.

Midlife crisis!?

I am sure the girl will do what is best for her and it sounds like the dad is more down to earth.

I agree, I thought this. Sounds like the Mum wants to "try again" with the next generation.

I did the "travel the world/party/lived it up" bit before settling down with DH and having our first DD when I was 31, he was 35. He did not get certain things "out of his system" before settling (too busy building his career and working to build a secure future) down. He now has itchy feet in a big way and would like us to seriously consider moving abroad and wants to travel anywhere at any given moment. I want these things for all four of us now (DD4 and DD21mo) but not as urgently as he does. I am a full time SAHM and am enrolling in the course that allows me to be a classroom assistant too, as a previous poster said, I'm going to do it as it fits in with my role as Mum, you don't do it for the money or career prospects. Previously I was an IT techie manager type. I have no desire to go back to my former career.
DH's parents didn't get their first grandchild until they were 67, fours years ago and now they have five. That will suit me fine, I want to enjoy some retirement to myself, as no doubt I'll be supporting my two through their education until I'm 55 anyway!

 

[wideeyes]

I had my DD the same week I turned 20, this was 5 years ago and now I have family asking if I am going another baby soon, though I have no intention of having another child at the moment or maybe not at all, when I think about it I think that "oh but then I won't be able to do this or that or go there", as now DD is getting older we want to go to other countries further away, like Canada, australia, USA and the caribbean,.

I feel as if another child will tie me down and it will be difficult to do the things I am doing at the moment like going to uni though I have had people see me going to uni while I have a young child as selfish, they thought I should stay at home. I know my mum would rather I had another baby than finished my degree, she does not think women need to go to uni as they don't need to support a family.

My mum is now trying to encourage my sister to find a rich husband even though my sister is very intelligent and plans to go to uni and build her own career for herself rather than depend on some one else.

 

[Lisash]

I met my DH when I was only 18, we married when I was 19 and I gave birth to our eldest just three days after my 21st birthday. She is now nearly 19 and I would be horrified if she came home anytime soon saying she wanted to get married and have kids etc. I don't regret marrying young, it was my choice, as was starting a family but it isn't what I want for my kids. There is so much more to see and do