Taking your kids' friends

[madthemouse]

I have allow my daughter to take a friend since she became a teenager. So much cooler then hanging out with dad. Anyway, I have provided, airfare, room, food and entertainment. I had the parents pay for the park passes, for WDW and US, and spending money for souvenirs,

I'm sure it's different for others, as to what they would have the other parents pay for. For me this works. After all, we're the ones offering the invitation.

That's my 2cnts.

 

[disneygal55]

I guess what you pay for kind of depends on the situation. My 2 sons are a little over a year apart and always had a great time at WDW because they could do things together. Their friends commented that they would love to go sometime so our kids asked us and their friends asked their parents. So all involved worked out a plan on who pays for what.

 

[PatsMom]

My daughter has invited a friend along three times (with a fourth upcoming in May). The kids were old enough that they had jobs. Each time we provided the lodging and food. My theory on the food was that the kids would live on pizza and burgers - I was the one who insisted that we eat at least one decent meal a day! I also bought a souvenir of the trip for each. The guest or parents were responsible for parkhopper and airfare and any extra souvenir money.

Of the three who have traveled with us, one was so-so. Couldn't really tell if she was having a good time but she was a good sport about things. One was the guest from hell - even my daughter couldn't wait to get rid of her! And one was absolutely awesome. Had a marvelous time. The guest going in May is a girl we know pretty well so we are comfortable taking her. Now that my daughter is in college it is harder to make arrangments since missing school is out of the question and her friends don't all have the same schedule she does.

We thought it was worth the hassle and expense of a guest because my daughter had a great time having someone her own age to hang out with. Much more fun than mom and dad.

 

[CleoPahd]

For the first time we are allowing our daughter, who is now in high school, to bring a friend on our next trip. Her friend had mentioned to her that she had never been to Disney World, knowing that we go often, and so my daughter asked if she could join us on our spring trip.

We were very up front with both her friend and her friend's parents and told them that though we would love to be able to pay for everything, it was not something that we could afford to do at this time. I asked that if her parents agreed to let her come with us, they pay for airfare & her park hopper and gave them the cost of both to think about before they made a decision. Airfare happens to be extremely expensive the week we are traveling due to spring break. To keep the cost down we decided to fly into Tampa and rent a car. It cut the price of the airfare down by about 1/2. They were fine with this and told me they completely expected to pay her entire way for the trip, but I told them that was unnecessary.

We upgraded our lodging to both allow the girls to have some privacy and to stay at a place that will be extra magical since it is her first trip to the world. We will pay for all baggage fees, meals & snacks and will of course cover any extra activities and or events we attend. I'm planning to give both girls a gift card to use for food & snacks when we aren't with them. I figure I will put some extra money on it as well for them to buy some treats & gifts for themselves. I've already told her friend that if she wishes to spend a lot on souvenirs, than she should bring some extra cash to use on top of what we give them.

I don't feel we're being cheap. We're sharing the expense to make an opportunity available that wouldn't otherwise be.

 

[BEASLYBOO]

DS(13) is an only child so we've been bringing friends along on vacation for many years. When I invite, I plan on paying. Most times though parents who let you take their children hopefully know you well enough and actually bring up the subject of money and park entry fees etc. , so we always come to some sort of agreement. I always pay for food/snacks because I want to make sure that DS's guest eats what he wants without reservation or concern not always knowing where and what kind of restaurants we will frequent.

Guests are always responsible for having a little spending money but in the end I treat them like my own (may not always be a good thing) and every one has a wonderful time.

 

[DCLbrideSept2009]

When we went in August (before becoming DVC members), our oldest brought a friend. She is 15 and the other 3 kids are 10, 10 and 7. So a big gap in the ages there. We drove, so no added expense there. Already had to get 2 rooms, so no added expense there either. AND we had free dining. We did ask the friend's parents to pay for her park ticket. They also said they would "send her with plenty of money for other expenses" but in the end I think they made her bring her own money, which she never offered. But that was okay. The added expense wasn't THAT much since we had the free dining. Now we're going in March as DVC members, so no free dining. BUT we will do some cheap meals in the villa. And again, already have to get a 2-bedroom because there are 6 of us, and already driving. She hasn't picked a friend yet, but we do plan on asking to at least pay for her park ticket. If they offer more, great. If not, we'll cover it. It's worth it to keep the sanity.

 

[ClarabelleCow]

DD brought a friend for the first time at age 16 (last February), we already were getting a 2 bedroom for the 4 of us anyway, so no big deal. Parents paid her airfare and bought her park ticket. We paid for the meal plan, and while parents did send her with money, told her to have fun, I think I asked for 20 bucks the last day because I was out of cash!!

On other occasions, we have done kind of the same thing, same friend came to St. Maarten with us, had parents pay for airfare, they sent her with cash, but we paid for food, and she used her money for spending.

This summer they took my daughter to France for a week, staying all over the place, I bought the airfare (ouch) as they travel first class!! and sent her with money for the parents, they may have taken 200-300 of the money to help cover some of the expenses. They went all over, visited Normandy, went to a horse race, saw it all.

I feel it's different if its a once in a life time thing. This coming April it's almost assumed the same girl is heading to St. Maarten with us, and it's a given my daughter is going to Club Med with them in the summer! If I could afford to just foot the bill every year, that would be fine, would love to do it, but it just gets too much!

A few years ago, I took my neice and my son to Disney, just the three of us (they were 8 & 9), my treat, but my sister refused to allow it and bought her airfare and park ticket. I covered the rest. Disney just isn't a cheap vacation, not sure I have an extra 1000 to cover every trip for a friend!

 

[DeeCee735]

When we take our kids friends, I ask them to pay their plane and park ticket. The room, food and entertainment are on us. It works out great and we usually get a great big thank you for taking them along. I usually get great plane tickets at about $220 round trip because I watch the prices and do my best to buy low. I haven't had a kid or parent have a problem with this at all. Works out good for all of us.

Good luck with your decision, and have fun!

 

[disneydawn6]

I have been bringing my kids friends for every trip we went on since they were 10. (30 now) It was also their friends asking me if they could come not me inviting them. I always said they could come if they could pay their own way. I always drove and paid for lodging and I always had food in the room but they always paid for tickets their own food and souveniers. The kids are all grown now and their friends still talk about all the trips we took to Disneyland, Yosemite, camping etc. Each of my girls could always take one friend. No way could I affort to pay all their ways and their families were always happy they could go. When my kids were invited I always sent enought money for food, tickets etc......

 

[rhonimouse]

We are taking my son's friend (13 yr old) with us during our Christmas trip.. They have been best friends since 4 years old, and is actually more like a cousin than merely a friend. We are close with the entire family, and the family is not very well off so the trip would not otherwise be possible for this friend...

Originally we were covering lodging, transportation, and food with his parents covering park admission and spend money- but I worked out a better trade, His parents are dog sitting for us and instead of having to board our pets we are paying park admission...they are happy to do it and it works out well for their budget and our dogs. This works for us because we are so close with this family....

 

[Rlbren]

We've taken my sons friend with us last year and we paid for the ticket and food for him. It was not a good trip. The boy had never been to Disney before and we realized he didn't want to ride anything. The trip was hard on all of us. Now my daughter who is 20 wants to bring her boyfriend for our annual trip in June. He will be 22 at the time of the trip and he is buying his own ticket but we will pay for the meals as we are going with the dining plan. I agree with one of the previous posters who said if it is a younger child then I would pay for everything except spending money.

It's good you have a relationship with the family of the child then you can set whatever monetary guidelines that makes you comfortable...

I hope you enjoy your trip!

 

[rentayenta]

We've taken my sons friend with us last year and we paid for the ticket and food for him. It was not a good trip. The boy had never been to Disney before and we realized he didn't want to ride anything. The trip was hard on all of us. Now my daughter who is 20 wants to bring her boyfriend for our annual trip in June. He will be 22 at the time of the trip and he is buying his own ticket but we will pay for the meals as we are going with the dining plan. I agree with one of the previous posters who said if it is a younger child then I would pay for everything except spending money.

It's good you have a relationship with the family of the child then you can set whatever monetary guidelines that makes you comfortable...

I hope you enjoy your trip!

I am enjoying everyone sharing. Right now we are still undecided. The child in question will ride anything and is allergic to nothing so as far as that goes, it's all good. Her mom is amazing and we have a very open relationship. I am still leaning towards having her pay for her ticket and souvenirs but we have a while to go.

 

[slmjam]

My daughter invited a friend along on our trip this summer. They are both 18, just graduating high school. I provided a written budget to the girl's parents of expected costs. I included everything I could think of - airfare, ticket costs, expected food costs (dining plan), and estimated souvenirs. We paid for the room, of course, as well as the dining plan for her friend. I also spoke with her parents about any medications she would need during our trip (if any), if there were any rides she should avoid due to medical reasons, and if there were any allergies I should be aware of. Her family paid for the airfare, tickets (thru Undercover Tourist), and souvenirs. I also included a medical authorization form for them to complete and have notarized in the event something happened while she was in our care. I also pre-purchased the Photopass CD and we made it a point of getting lots of pictures, especially with the girls together, so they could remember this trip. I made a copy of the CD for her family so they would have all the pictures we did. This worked out well for us. Their family knew all their costs ahead of time, as did we, and we had a great time!

 

[marvali]

We did this on our trip last year around New Years. We already had the room (DVC at Jambo House) and we already had APs so we didn't need any tickets for us. Our youngest DS mentioned way ahead that he was fixing to go on his xth-trip to WDW and his good friend J had never been before. Good kid and friends with parents through sports and school activities. The stickler was two sets of parents and being around the holidays, plus not being involved in that "first" in his life.

I talked to his Dad privately before either boy knew, so as not to put any pressure on the situation. Just an "if we can work it out" type thing. I presented it way ahead of time (around now) in case money was an issue, so it could possibly be part of Christmas if needed. I told him if they could buy his ticket, we already had the room, and were driving so also the transportation. I even told them where they could get the ticket at a discount. They all talked about it and let me know it was all good and he could go. They got him a 5-day park hopper (to match our APs) and when we arrived to pick him up, they gave me an envelope with $$ for food and souvenirs. I was willing to pay for food since I knew it wouldn't be that much more, and actually did pay for some anyway, but I think a lot of it was Christmas $$ given for the occasion. We set up a Character breakfast we always enjoyed so he could have that experience, but other than that food wasn't that bad since we did mostly CS and had a few meals in the kitchen in our room.

We planned a special night to reveal the plan for him to go with us. It took a couple minutes for them both to figure out what it really meant, but when it hit them both the reaction was priceless. Well worth the effort and planning. We had a great time, and I think we got more out of it than he did watching him experience all of it for the first time.

I would suggest just make the offer and tell them what you are willing to do as your part, or just tell them "we already have the room, etc. and can handle blah, blah, blah" and see what they offer to do on their own. Since you have a good relationship with them, I'm sure the discussion and planning will go much smoother than you think.

 

[BillPA]

We have 3 children, now all adults, but we always had 1 extra child go along. That way there were always an even number. Most rides sit 2 at a time...

I will not get into the cost discussion. That is your decission.

But I would suggest you bring a copy of the childs medical insurance card and a note, notorized is best, authorizing you to make desissions if a medical need arises. We never thought to do this, then one trip one of the kids got sick and getting help was very difficult.

You know, after that we always had a copy of their insurance card and a letter. We NEVER needed it. But we all were able to relax more just knowing we were covered if something happened.

Have a great trip.

 

[Lost in Neverland]

We crossed this bridge in the Summer on our trip. We invited a friend for my son for the first time. We spoke with the parents before asking him to go to ensure it was something they were willing to allow their child to do. We did not even have to get to the financial part before they offered to pay for everything. We were prepared to pay for meals, lodging and transportation as well as a side trip to Sea World. The only thing that we were going to ask his parents to pay for was his PH for WDW. We are very lucky with my sons choice in friends in the fact that we get along with all the parents to the point we can discuss expenses of a trip. We just at the time could not afford to pay the extra for PH since my son and friend are classed an adult. I would never come right out and ask for money to cover food or extra trips so we are always prepared to pay for those and if we can not then we do not feel we should be asking a guest. The great thing about my kids are they are close enough in age to be company to each other though as DD gets into her teens we are starting to see that change .

 

[Donna M]

Twice we have taken friends for our kids and they pay. They pay for their airfair and park tickets along with spending money and any special show we might see. We provide the room and food. We talk to the parent before anything is said to the child.

We couldn't afford to spring for everything!

 

[My5Mouseketeers]

Looking at it from the other side -

If I found out that a parent of one of my kids friends thought about inviting my child and then decided they couldn't because they couldn't afford to pay my child's way, I would be very disappointed. I hate the idea that someone could think of not asking someone to go with them because of the money. This should be a conversation between the parents.

 

[BraveMom3]

Everybody's situation is different, but I did this with the oldest of my 3 children this past June/July. We were to be at WDW for 2 weeks and one of my DS's (16yo at time of trip) friends is a real disney finatic and practically invited himself. I told my son that he could go with us for the first 5 nights. There's no way I want to spend my entire 2 week vacation with "company". The boy rode with us, paid for his park tickets, and some of his food. On day 5, I took him to the airport and he flew home. He and my son had a great time, and he still talks about it.