Someone get a restraining order...

[TxRabbit]

I can't seem to stop dreaming about another Disney vacation and we haven't paid off the last one yet!!

AND we don't have the money to go on another one. And yet, I still find myself daydreaming, looking at dates, checking out the different resorts, comparing prices...and yet, I know that we really can't afford to go.

I am still so tempted though.

So how do you deal with it when you really want something, but you know you can't afford it. Doesn't have to be Disney. Could be anything. How do you help yourself resist the urge to just slap it all on a credit card and deal with the consequences?

You'd think I would be better able to deal with the spending urge by now, but obviously, I have issues. I'm serious too. I would love to hear how all you budget experts out there deal with it. Obviously, I need help. A new mindset. SOMETHING!!

 

[Chicago526]

I try to keep in mind how good my next trip will feel if, while at WDW, I know that we both saved up for the trip and paid in cash up front AND we can afford to spend that money. Knowing I can order that expensive entre or buy that unplanned souvineer and not have to worry about how I'm going to pay for it when I get home. Now that is FREEDOM!!!

My last Disney trip was a few days at DLR not long after my mother passed, DH and I needed to be in our happy place for a while, budget be damned. Even though I'd given myself "permision" to spend the money, it was still nagging at me that this was comming out of the money we are using to pay down our CC debt, and it just did not feel good at all. I want my next trip to be $$$ worry free, and that won't happen until our CC debt is paid off AND we have saved to pay for the trip upfront AND we can afford to spend said money. That feeling is going to be worth putting off that trip!

 

[TxRabbit]

I try to keep in mind how good my next trip will feel if, while at WDW, I know that we both saved up for the trip and paid in cash up front AND we can afford to spend that money. Knowing I can order that expensive entre or buy that unplanned souvineer and not have to worry about how I'm going to pay for it when I get home. Now that is FREEDOM!!!

My last Disney trip was a few days at DLR not long after my mother passed, DH and I needed to be in our happy place for a while, budget be damned. Even though I'd given myself "permision" to spend the money, it was still nagging at me that this was comming out of the money we are using to pay down our CC debt, and it just did not feel good at all. I want my next trip to be $$$ worry free, and that won't happen until our CC debt is paid off AND we have saved to pay for the trip upfront AND we can afford to spend said money. That feeling is going to be worth putting off that trip!

If I understand what you are writing, you are going to save up for your next Disney trip to pay in advance. Are you going to do that while still paying down cc's? Or are you going to make yourself pay off your cc's first?

We have cc debt. As much as I'd like to pay it all off before another vacation, I just don't know if I could wait for a vacation for as long as it will take to do that. Not that it has to be a huge, expensive vacation...

 

[luvsJack]

I know just how you feel, I price a trip at least once a week. And when I receive a pin by email---OMG! the web is smokin' from me trying to see if I can afford to go again. But, alas, it is not in the cards right now.

 

[CTdiznymom]

So how do you deal with it when you really want something, but you know you can't afford it.


DH usually brings me back to reality!

I just found out that he had a PIN sitting in his email since forever and never mentioned it We don't go as often as most. It's been 4 long years and I deperately want to go, but it doesn't look like it's in the realm of possible right now

 

[lovemygoofy]

I do not like having bills hanging over my head. Just thinking about coming home to a large credit card bill after spending a couple of thousand or even a thousand on a vacation is not something I can handle. I need a certain precentage of money in the bank as a security blanket.

OP, I totally hear you on going away for a vacation. My husband and I haven't had a real honest to goodness vacation in 3 years. I keep teasing him that the only person going anywhere is him but he keeps assuring me that Iraq and Afghanstain is not a vacation destination

I worry about emergencies alot. House stuff breaking, the mom's always needing stuff, and other things that get in the way of life. Next year we will have finished paying off the little bad debt we collected and go on vacation if we hit the magic savings number again. I sure hope so and sending myself some magic for it

Until then, I don't deny myself totally all the happy things in life. We still go to the movies or a night away or a $100 splurge shopping trip. We have a cap on what we can and will spend and any big decent vacation is way beyond that as I want to vacation guilt free.

 

[downsouth]

Sorry I couldn't get past the we still haven't finished paying for the last one yet!

 

[wdwfan16]

The key is to never start looking at or planning for something that you do not already have the money to purchase.

I never look at cars unless I need to get a car. I never look at Disney hotels or prices when I do not have the vacation money already.

When I do have the money I will not allow myself to spend more than we have for that item.

 

[hoosiergirl7]

I still can't get past the fact that you took a vacation that isn't yet paid for and you want to take another one you can't pay for.

My only suggestion is keep dreaming. Don't take another Disney vacation until you can pay for it before you take it. I wouldn't dream of taking a vacation that I didn't pay for before I went on it.

Not trying to hurt your feelings but I couldn't imagine walking around with any amount of debt.

 

[cheesekate2005]

I would say start paying off your last trip and then, get saving for the next one! Disney will be there when you are ready - and it will feel much better when you are there and it is paid for in advance!

I am always dreaming of the next disney vacation, but I know that I need the cash up front to do it - so we budget it out a year or so in advance so it is paid for when we go! It gives me an incentive to save.

I used to have trouble thinking this way but DH got me into this habit and it works!

 

[TxRabbit]

Sorry I couldn't get past the we still haven't finished paying for the last one yet!

We are in that 6 month 0% financing period with the Disney card.

As much as I would like to be out of debt, DH and I got into debt early on and are having a hard time getting out of it. The debt is from things beyond our control, car issues, house issues, moving (an average of every 13 months until 3 years ago), emergencies, etc.

It will be years before we are out of debt. And I know that I shouldn't be looking at things that I can't afford. But I also don't know that I can't afford to NOT have a break. DH too. We finally stopped the moving cycle. He commutes 120+ miles a day and has for over 18 months.

In fact, we just tried moving in with family (since our house is in the middle of being fixed up) so that DH could have a break from the commute. We moved twice in six weeks. It wasn't cheap. It didn't help us bring down the debt.

I understand the whole not having the debt hang over your head idea, but I've always had debt hanging over my head. I don't have the other experience to compare and say, yes, that is SO MUCH BETTER.

I understand the concept. I understand what I am SUPPOSED to do. I'm honest and admit that my strength of resolve is weak. Any practical tips for how to satisfy the need for a break without breaking the bank?

 

[gracie1]

I totally understand what you are saying about needing a break. I wish I was like others on this board and saved cash for vacations but I am probably one of the few on the board that put it on a cc and am paying for it. I have always done it and always will. Does it put a damper on my vacation knowing I will have to pay the bills when I get home?? Nope! But I understand some people it would. You can't have others decide for you. You need to do what you both want to do. Maybe if you can't afford it right now plan on a vacation next year. You can always make payments if you don't want to put it on a cc. But like I said, I am in the minority because i do the same thing!

 

[luvsJack]

I don't have a cc any more and did pay all mine off, but I don't think you have to not ever take a vacation until you have all your cards paid off.

Figure out what you need to pay montly to pay off your cc in X amount of time (whatever time frame you and dh are comfortable with and keeps the payments at a reasonable amount so that you can still enjoy life, don't add anything to the cards during that time).

Once you have that monthly amount, look at your budget and decided if you can afford another trip if you pay on it monthly until the time to go (I plan our trips 12-18 months out but I guess you could do it even longer).

Then you have to decide if you want to pay that monthly amount on a Disney trip, save for something else, on doing other things or paying down more debt. Whatever is most important to you.

 

[TxRabbit]

I don't have a cc any more and did pay all mine off, but I don't think you have to not ever take a vacation until you have all your cards paid off.

Figure out what you need to pay montly to pay off your cc in X amount of time (whatever time frame you and dh are comfortable with and keeps the payments at a reasonable amount so that you can still enjoy life, don't add anything to the cards during that time).

Once you have that monthly amount, look at your budget and decided if you can afford another trip if you pay on it monthly until the time to go (I plan our trips 12-18 months out but I guess you could do it even longer).

Then you have to decide if you want to pay that monthly amount on a Disney trip, save for something else, on doing other things or paying down more debt. Whatever is most important to you.

I totally agree with your methodology. It's what we did for this past trip. Figure out what you can pay each month to pay the vacation off, keep plugging away at the cc debt, follow the plan.

Things happen. Like the furnace goes out, and I'm thinking that while we made it through last winter without it, this winter is supposed to be colder. It's time to fork out the dough and get a new furnace. Bye bye vacation.

I guess what I am wondering is how does everyone keep to their plan? I know that there are personality types out there that just make a plan and stick to it. They have no problems. They just avoid any and all temptations. They control their thoughts. They don't even dwell on what they can't have. Fine.

I'm not like that.

And I'm wondering, for other people who have managed to control themselves, what tactics/tips/tricks do they employee while they are on the plan, so to speak, to keep themselves to the plan? Especially if they aren't the kind of people that have an easy time of it.

So. If a year goes by and you can't take a big vacation, what have you done to help that year go by and still give yourself a break? And in the meantime, if there is something that comes up, how do you cope?

I read all the time on this board about people dealing with their money. They seem to have it all under control. I'm just trying to pick brains here. Practical advice. A little help. I struggle with this. I understand. There's a point in time when you just have to deal. Be adult. Get over it. Ok. But does ANYONE have a little sugar that will help the medicine go down?

 

[gillenkl]

We won't be going back to Disney until 2012 - and that's a hard pill to swallow for me. However, that's how long it will take us to save - we will still be going on some other smaller vacations in the meantime just not disney. So we try and put a little of disney in our life like - disney movie night once a month with pizza and popcorn, we also are going to Disney on Ice in January. I know it's hard but just think how good it will be to not come home to any bills after your vacation! We have really gotten more budget-wise with our life and do not have any debt other than our home. Good luck!

 

[TxRabbit]

We won't be going back to Disney until 2012 - and that's a hard pill to swallow for me. However, that's how long it will take us to save - we will still be going on some other smaller vacations in the meantime just not disney. So we try and put a little of disney in our life like - disney movie night once a month with pizza and popcorn, we also are going to Disney on Ice in January. I know it's hard but just think how good it will be to not come home to any bills after your vacation! We have really gotten more budget-wise with our life and do not have any debt other than our home. Good luck!

That's what I'm talking about!!

I'm just not feeling too creative these days. I need this kind of help. Disney movie nights. Love it.

And Disney on ice! That's fun too. We have been watching figure skating lately. I guess the season just got started. I'll have to see if it's coming to my area...and how much it is.

I sympathize with the whole 2012 thing. On this past vacation, we did the 4/3 deal. We maxed the park days and got the non expiring option. So we have park tickets. I'm hoping that will help us get back sooner, but it's looking like at least 2011 for us. Maybe 2012. *sigh*

 

[luvsJack]

ahhhh, I see, you want ways to get that "disney fix". Well, we do the disney movie nights too. Right now with all the holidays coming up, we use disney decorations for the house and the yard. We also enjoy watching our planning videos and the videos we took on our last trip sometimes.

As for getting a break without being able to afford an actual vacation, I like to plan at least monthly "outings" for the family. This month we are going to the fair and of course we will do a couple of things for Halloween. Labor day we spent the day in Pensacola. Not always big stuff, but most of the time it at least gets us out of town for the day and away from our usual routine.

 

[TxRabbit]

ahhhh, I see, you want ways to get that "disney fix". Well, we do the disney movie nights too. Right now with all the holidays coming up, we use disney decorations for the house and the yard. We also enjoy watching our planning videos and the videos we took on our last trip sometimes.

As for getting a break without being able to afford an actual vacation, I like to plan at least monthly "outings" for the family. This month we are going to the fair and of course we will do a couple of things for Halloween. Labor day we spent the day in Pensacola. Not always big stuff, but most of the time it at least gets us out of town for the day and away from our usual routine.

Excuse me if this is just too rude, but what do you budget for your monthly outings? Or at least how? Do you have an annual budget for your monthly outings and then draw off that each month, a bit more here and less there. Or do you have a range and so long as you are within the range, you feel good?

Yes, Disney fix. Yes a break from routine. Yes getting out of town and away from the norm.

I like the fair idea. Used to love going to the county fairs when I lived in CA. We've never done the Rodeo here. I think that's in the spring though. Love the Renaissance Festival, too. And that's going on right now. I admit that we have a tendency to overspend on outings like that though. Here a turkey leg. There a funnel cake. The games. The rides. The costumes. The weapons. IK. But true. DS got a long bow last year. LOL.

If you do a movie night, what do you do to make it "special?" We tend to watch a lot of movies because we use a digital converter and generally, movies are preferable to anything on broadcast.

Again, I'm drained and dry. Not feeling creative. Looking to add some cheap spice to life to help us get through what is looking to be something of a vacation dryspell. Any more suggestions?

 

[gillenkl]

Excuse me if this is just too rude, but what do you budget for your monthly outings? Or at least how? Do you have an annual budget for your monthly outings and then draw off that each month, a bit more here and less there. Or do you have a range and so long as you are within the range, you feel good?

We have an "entertainment" fund in our monthly budget - out of that comes vacation and any monthly "outings" - such as Disney on Ice, or camping which we do alot of because it's relatively inexpensive for us. If we don't use the funds it keeps building. We don't do that many "outings" because we trying to look at the big picture - the big prize at the end which would be our disney trip.

 

[Cinder-Belle]

I suffer from spending urges and have let things get crazy over the past few years. I am trying to get control over spending, myself.

The one thing that I have set clear boundaries on is our Disney trips.

We started planning the next family trip in Fall 08. We will be going in November 2010. We just booked and paid the deposits.

We have been saving by putting money into an account instead of exchanging gifts. Like my husband and I give money into an account instead of giving each other Birthday, anniversary, valentine's gifts. We still do cards, but we put Disney stickers in the card as a reminder of where the money is going. We still exchange Christmas gifts and other very small gifts, but we try to do practical, needed items.

Even my parents and grandmother are in on it. (my parents have decided to join the trip. it will be my children's first visit)

We have saved about half the cost of the package. We will have to charge some on the trip, but I'm OK with that.

It is hard and I know all about needing a "break" and taking the plunge. Unfortunately, I am having to try to cut some debt. I take short trips to take the edge off. I also take FULL advantage of work related trips (once or twice a year). They are never to great places or very far, but I just take it all in and enjoy the moment. At least I am getting a break, seeing new places, getting re-imbursed is the best!

I also try to watch lots of Disney Movies and I find planning the trip and reading tips and updates on this board keeps me feeling the "vibe". It gives me the fix without the cost.

I have also been putting things back. I shop too much. So, I have been trying to stop before I check out and REALLY assess each and every item. I try to put as much as I can back.

I am also trying to go through all of my past unused purchases. Like stationary, bath stuff, purses, etc. I am planning to gift as much of that stuff as I can this year at Christmas. I have to buy for my kids, but I am going to get "rid" of a bunch of stuff by gifting my husband's family and even my own family. I am making other gifts to save money.

I am also selling some items on Ebay.

I guess the key is that old habits die hard. I know from experience and I fight it every day. I have champagne taste and a wine cooler budget.

Good luck!