Yes, it is not that I don't trust that he will look out for her, I just worry. I worry about everything, I admit that.
I worry about safety all the time.
and no he was not drinking , doing drugs, and is not mentally or physically disabled. and I am sure I did insult him in a way.
but he knows me, he knows how I am ...........LOL, we have been married for 23 years!
Please do yourself and your family a favor and figure out the reasons why you worry about everything.
I have a mother who is like that and believe me, it is a burden for the family to bear. And what it ends up doing is making everyone in the family tiptoe and sneak around trying to make sure Mom doesn't find out what we're doing so she doesn't worry, because her worry drives everyone to distraction. You learn to be sneaky, in essence, or at least not forthcoming, because to be forthcoming means a constant barrage of worry.
I have spent my life keepong my mother on a "need to know" basis. Things I would have liked to share I didn't because I knew she would worry. Times when it would have been nice to have my mother's support or counsel, I didn't have it because had I told her my problem, she would have worried to an extreme degree and driven me insane had she known I was having some sort of issue or problem. Heck, I went through 5 years of infertility treatment that she never knew about because had she known, she would had constantly been harping on when I had to have procedures, what about the anesthesia, what if I bled to death and so on. There were experiences that I missed growing up because I know that if I had asked to do them, the answer would have been no because she would not have been able to bear to let me do it because she would have worried or if the answer was yes, the time leading up to the experience would have been filled with listening to how much she was going to worry while I was gone. I recall one summer day telling my mother that I would be going to NYC for the day with my neighbor (we were both in our late 30's/early 40's at the time) and she told me not to wear shorts because someone might run up to me and cut my legs with a knife because "you know how New York is" and then I got the litany of "Why do you have to go? What's in New York that we don't have here? Don't come home in the dark" and so on and so on......
My parents are now in their 8o's and their world is very small because my mother worries about them driving in the dark, my mother worries about them driving too far because what if the car breaks down, my mother worries about what if my father is driving and has a heart attack they could both be killed (and my father has
no history of heart trouble). They go very few places because of this pathological worrying. At this point, it's easeir for my father to just give in to her than to argue with her. My mother worries about it being cold outside that they'll catch pneumonia, she worries about us driving to & from work because we could get into a car accident, my sister-in-law taking the train to & from work because soemone could get on the train and start shooting like happened once all those years ago.
I believe that her feeling is that worrying about everything is the sign of a good wife & mother, and, in fact, it has done more harm than good. I know she has tried her best, and there are many good things about my mother, so I don't mean to make her sound like she is a terrible person, but the extreme worrying was always a problem for us, and did impact our lives and not in a good way.
In my mother's case, I think her pathological worrying had something ot do with having an alcoholic father. She never had a sense of calm or control or security growing up, and was always anxious about what would it be like when she got home? I think that constant feeling of insecurity or unpredictability makes her HATE anything that goes outside of her very small comfort zone.
So please, do yourself and your family a favor and figure out why you worry so much and how to fix it.
