skipping a MDR and your server...

[ptcbass]

Do you feel bad if you don't go to the main dining room and see your server one night? We went all nights but once for breakfast/lunch (I can't remember which one) we went to a main dining room. We didn't have our normal server and I expected that. Later we saw him and apparently he was in the other dining room during that time and asked where we eat because he had seen us walk by where he was at. I felt kind of bad for not knowing he was in there and not eating there for that meal. I can't imagine missing dinner. I know it is my vacation and I should do what I want but I did feel bad (I'm just that kind of person). Any advise\comments?

We thought about skipping RP next time but I don't want there to be any awkward feelings about my family not showing up to see our server for one night.

 

[KristiMc]

No - don't feel bad. If we have planned Remy or Palo, we just let our servers know that night before so that they are not waiting for us. You should also not feel bad about not eating breakfast/lunch where your servers are.

 

[DISNEY FANTASY]

I tell them in advance so they do not wait for me or the table can be used, we do Palo and Remy it's not an issue.

 

[mmouse37]

Do you feel bad if you don't go to the main dining room and see your server one night? We went all nights but once for breakfast/lunch (I can't remember which one) we went to a main dining room. We didn't have our normal server and I expected that. Later we saw him and apparently he was in the other dining room during that time and asked where we eat because he had seen us walk by where he was at. I felt kind of bad for not knowing he was in there and not eating there for that meal. I can't imagine missing dinner. I know it is my vacation and I should do what I want but I did feel bad (I'm just that kind of person). Any advise\comments?

We thought about skipping RP next time but I don't want there to be any awkward feelings about my family not showing up to see our server for one night.

Whenever you have lunch/breakfast in an MDR the chances that you would get your regular server are pretty slim. they could be working at any other food place for breakfast or lunch. No need to feel bad. How on earth would you know where your server was serving unless you happened to ask him/her the night before. Some people do that.

Absolutely no reason to feel guilty. Breakfast and lunch are totally up to you where to eat.

Also, if you choose to do dinner elsewhere than your MDR for dinner you should not feel guilty. Of course if you don't eat in the dining room for dinner there is still the expectation of tipping the minimum gratuities as if you ate in the dining room all week. No reason to penalize your server if you choose to eat elsewhere for dinner.

We have done Palo dinner many times over the course of our DCL cruising and we just let the server know we have Palo and won't be at dinner that night. No big deal at all and the servers are always fine with it. They know Palo is a big draw and expect people to dine there sometimes.

MJ

 

[jennab05]

One night on the Fantasy we were just not feeling MDR service even tho we LOVED our waitstaff. We just wanted a quick meal and continue on with our night... so we decided to go to Cabanas thinking it was a buffet style like breakfast. We were wrong. We were seated at a table and had servers take care of us... I guess they use cabanas dinner to train new waitstaff. We felt horrible about missing our waitstaff for the ones we had since we really enjoyed them and felt like we missed out on great convos (don't get me wrong we loved the waitstaff at cabanas too but you know we REALLY loved the MDR ones..) so lesson learned and we will stick to the MDR from now on. I think it's all just preference and how well you connect with the servers but we've always had great experiences and love seeing them all the time.

 

[aprilchem]

We are not MDR people at all - we really dislike it. On our first cruise we went the first three nights and decided we'd had enough, so we took a couple of nights off. When we went back the servers made us feel SO guilty, asking and asking about why we weren't there; they even had the head server call us twice in our cabin.

On our second cruise we told our servers right away that we don't like the MDRs and probably would skip most nights, but that it wouldn't be reflected on their tip. They seemed fine with that, and we ended up doing Palo or Remy several nights.

 

[wendyoconnor]

We usually miss one night in the MDRs for Palo and we let our servers know the night before that we won't be at dinner. The serving teams expect that their diners will miss a night or two. We always say hi when we run into our servers during lunch or breakfast.

 

[kathi]

We have been on several Dream cruises and never stepped into the rotational dining rooms (Remy and Palo the entire trip). We let them know in advance and always tip them generously (more than the recommended amount).

As long as you are courteous and notify them and tip them appropriately, you should not feel bad. It's less work for them anyway.

 

[GSUJillybean]

I don't think it matters as long as you tip. I don't think there's enough time to develop a relationship with your servers on a 7 day trip, so I don't understand the question.

When we cruise, I tip the staff well, but I don't try to make friends, if that makes sense.

 

[DISNEY FANTASY]

We have been on several Dream cruises and never stepped into the rotational dining rooms (Remy and Palo the entire trip). We let them know in advance and always tip them generously (more than the recommended amount).

As long as you are courteous and notify them and tip them appropriately, you should not feel bad. It's less work for them anyway.

They could be assigned other duties.


Someone moved from late to main dinner.

 

[bumbershoot]

I tell them in advance so they do not wait for me or the table can be used, we do Palo and Remy it's not an issue.

Yep. That's the biggest reason to let them know, so that they don't wonder if they should delay service for the others at your table. On our first cruise, which was royal not Disney, we were at a table for 8 but only 4 ever showed up. The first night we waited on the other four. A few nights in the other two stopped showing and we had to insist to the servers that we were actually still hungry and they needed to my delay us. If those 6 had just told the servers they wouldn't be there it would have been nicer for us.

 

[disneynme]

We do not feel guilty when we skip for Palo or Remy's. We always tell our servers the night before. But, our most recent cruise, the servers acted put out that we weren't going to dine with them the next night. It rubbed me the wrong way.

 

[ptcbass]

Our next one is another 3 nighter and we requested our same server again. We really liked him last time and enjoyed talking. We had our own table and hope to again but I never thought they would make one family wait if the other family wasn't there yet. Seems like it would be no big deal to go ahead and take care of the one family. Anyway, we would never short the tip even if we didn't go. I feel like they are under tipped as it is and add more to it. I would feel strange not tipping at Cabanas. If we get Royal palace the first night we wouldn't be able to tell our server we weren't going to be there. I guess we could stop by to see if we could get a message to him.

Can you pick where you want to sit at Cabanas for dinner? What kind of menu do they have?

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Our next one is another 3 nighter and we requested our same server again. We really liked him last time and enjoyed talking. We had our own table and hope to again but I never thought they would make one family wait if the other family wasn't there yet. Seems like it would be no big deal to go ahead and take care of the one family. Anyway, we would never short the tip even if we didn't go. I feel like they are under tipped as it is and add more to it. I would feel strange not tipping at Cabanas. If we get Royal palace the first night we wouldn't be able to tell our server we weren't going to be there. I guess we could stop by to see if we could get a message to him.

Can you pick where you want to sit at Cabanas for dinner? What kind of menu do they have?

The menu at Cabanas for dinner is a selection of items pulled from the other MDR menus that night. Plus, typically, a salad bar and carving station.

So, the offerings there will be similar to what you would be offered in the other MDRs.

 

[ptcbass]

The menu at Cabanas for dinner is a selection of items pulled from the other MDR menus that night. Plus, typically, a salad bar and carving station.

So, the offerings there will be similar to what you would be offered in the other MDRs.

Thanks
I can't wait to try Cabanas for dinner. Sounds like a great option!
Now I won't feel so bad about not being in the MDR. I will try to let my server know.

Thanks again everyone

 

[NewRVLady]

We do not feel guilty when we skip for Palo or Remy's. We always tell our servers the night before. But, our most recent cruise, the servers acted put out that we weren't going to dine with them the next night. It rubbed me the wrong way.

Ok , as a never cruised person, this baffles me!
Is a tip given at EACH meal-is that why they are miffed?

 

[PrincessShmoo]

Ok , as a never cruised person, this baffles me!
Is a tip given at EACH meal-is that why they are miffed?

No, gratuities for your servers are included in the auto-gratuity that's added to your onboard account.

We've had servers that have told us that they would miss us the nights we dined in the adult dining venues (or otherwise), but certainly not "miffed". Not saying there aren't some whose demeanor may read as miffed, but we've not had them.

Maybe it's just a difference in how a guest interprets a servers comments?

 

[tweis]

No, gratuities for your servers are included in the auto-gratuity that's added to your onboard account.

We've had servers that have told us that they would miss us the nights we dined in the adult dining venues (or otherwise), but certainly not "miffed". Not saying there aren't some whose demeanor may read as miffed, but we've not had them.

Maybe it's just a difference in how a guest interprets a servers comments?

I get where the PP is coming from. We decided to skip the MDR after a long day at Atlantis and chose instead to go to Cabanas much later than our early dining time. I honestly felt scolded the next night at dinner when our server wanted to know why we didn't come to dinner. It was a last minute decision so I was not able to let him know ahead of time but I still did not appreciate the scolding we got.

 

[SillyInventor]

To the OP: you don't have to make close friends with your servers. Remember you pay Disney a lot of money to make you happy. Not the other way around.
It is common sense to let them know in you will skip an MDR when you know in advance (Palo, Remy, late Port Adventure, or just other plans), certainly when you are seated with others, who may wait for you to join before ordering. And of course be polite to each other as human to human, but that's not the discussion here.
It's your cruise and you decide what you do to make it the way you enjoy most. If that's in the MDR: fine, if that is with a cheeseburger on the pooldek: fine too!
Anyway: remember to relax and enjoy your cruise.

 

[Uncleromulus]

As already suggested, you're not there to make friends--just to eat.

The tips are already calculated so it isn't as tho they will miss a tip for that evening.


Even tho we're just 2 adults with a table for two, we always tell the servers--as a courtesy--the night before we dine at Palo and Remy