Sirman – Part II – “The Thunderous Aroma…”

doug65

Mouseketeer
Joined
Apr 2, 2004
Messages
118
See Sirman - Part I - "The Buffalo Hunt"

What was I thinking indeed.

I wake up early, very early. 5:30am early, to be exact. As I said before, we’re in a two bedroom suite at the VWL. Master bedroom (y’know, the one with the kingsize bed, whirlpool tub and bipolar mood-lighting) is occupied by BIL/SIL/Nephew. The “Living Room” is occupied by our benefactors, who are kind enough to sleep on the pull-out couch. We, meaning Liz, Isabella, Franklin and I, are sleeping in the second bedroom which has two queen beds and a crib.

The night before, I made sure to lay out everything that I would need when I got up so I wouldn’t wake anyone. So anyway, I quitely get up, get dressed and slip outside into the hall. It’s still considered night-time by Disney, so the temperature in the hallway is about 50 degrees. I go downstairs (more John Barry) and outside (ah, warmth!) and across to the lobby of the WL (more Copeland, but very subdued – it’s early). I make my way across the lobby and down the graded, walkway at the west side to the Roaring Forks snack shop which is still closed. It doesn’t open ‘til six which is what I get for being an early-morning insomniac.

Finally, it opens so I buy my bottomless mug and fill it with the famed Nescafé sludge-what-sucks-out-loud-my-word-that’s-so-bad-I-wouldn’t-use-it-to-clean-a-catbox coffee. This by the way, is the only advantage the Poly and AKL have over WL: decent coffee that doesn’t make you question your willingness to go on living. So I take my cup of, what I can only in the most reckless and cavalier of manners call, “coffee” and walk out to the dock.

*BIG, DEEP, CONTENTED SIGH* Here am I, sitting on the dock, drinking “coffee” and looking out across the absolutely still, glassy surface of the Lagoon where a lone egret or crane of some kind is slowly flying over the waters, while the sun rises in the east. Here, let’s do that again. *BIG, DEEP, CONTENTED SIGH* Life could be a lot worse. I sit there and pray and read my book and look out across the water and pray and read. I do this for the next hour and a half. Yep, much worse.

At 7:30, which is what time I informed everyone that I considered to be the acceptable beginning of the day, I return to our suite to find that some of these lazy sluggards are actually awake. The plan is to leave by 9am because the AK is at the other end of the complex, it takes at least ½ an hour to get there in the mornings and we want to be at the gates when they open. Are we all clear on this? Good.

8:30am. My BIL emerges from his room. We’ll be leaving soon. “I want to go for a run first,” he says, and is immediately shouted down by someone other than myself. I’m very proud of the fact that I didn't kill him then and there. My BIL is a nice guy, he really is. I don’t think he has ever wanted to hurt anyone, and he hasn't got a malicious bone in his body. But sometimes, he just doesn't feel the vibe, so to speak.

Still some people have to shower and, oh my paws and whiskers, “do” their hair before we leave. An aside, indeed a word of advice: it’s frickin’ central FLORIDA!!! It’s JUNE!!! Unless you’ve gone to CostCo or Sam’s Club and stocked up on several gallons of AquaNet SuperHold Hair Lacquer, YOUR HAIR WILL NOT “WORK” HERE!!! Just…walk…away; it’s not worth it. So we end up getting to the bus stop at 9:45am. Yes, that’s fourty-five minutes later than our goal of 9AM. (…and really, don’t you think ‘anal-retentive’ needs to be hyphenated?)

So, wait, bus, ride, stop, ride, stop, ride, get off bus, walk to gate, wait in line for bag searches, snafu at the gate, not my problem, “I-see-nothink!”

It’s weird, but the first thing I think of after I get through the gate is Stephen King. I know, it’s Disney! How could I think of Stephen King? That’s just wrong! Sick and wrong! Well, in King’s book, “The Stand” a dread disease wipes out 99% of the human race in a matter of weeks. One survivor is in NYC and is walking by the Central Park Zoo. King describes his nostrils as being assailed by “…the thunderous aroma of wild-animal s**t.” This runs through my mind as I am truly assailed by such a “thunderous aroma,” and I experience an auditory hallucination of the voice of James Earl Jones saying, “Welcome to the Animal Kingdom!” That’s what I get for reading pulp fiction. But hey, it beats thinking about Dostoevsky at Disney World.

We’re hoofin’ it across the park. Liz, Is, Frank and I are leading the way; Benefactors are in the middle grouping, followed closely by BIL/SIL/Nephew. Now, if you took MK, Epcot, and MGM and grouped them all next to one another, they could fit inside AK with room to spare. It’s that big. Kil. Safaris is of course, darned near on the other side of the park so we have a way to walk. “And we’re walking, we’re walking…” And as we’re walking, I keep looking back and noticing that we’re getting further and further from the others. Others keep stopping to gaze upon some new irrelevancy. This won’t do. Y’see, togetherness means togetherness in my wife’s family, and doing your own thing is a thing that is simply not done. My wife insists we stop and wait.

The thing is, BIL/SIL/Nephew live in Ft. Walton Beach. They were just here a couple of months ago with HER family. They were here for several days staying at the boardwalk. I have absolutely no sympathy or interest in the fact that they have spotted something diverting. Good Lord! Where the hell is Commando Nikki© when you need her?

As we finally, FINALLY get to the now accumulated line for the safaris, I realize that my free-floating load of generalized hostility is rapidly building and I need to be distracted before I go both Mount St. Helen’s and Medieval on someone. I start playing with Isabella & Frank and decompress. A weird exercise: I build up a huge head of steam waiting for certain other people so we don’t have to stand in line forever, and then spend the time standing in line to slowly let off the aforementioned steam.

So we ride the ride and, yes, there are animals and, ok, the kids loved it. Frankly, the animals we saw were ones we see every time we go to the Toledo zoo, so I got a lot more entertainment value out of watching the kids faces and listening to our guide. I’m not sayin’ it’s not worth it; I’m just sayin’, meh.

Afterward, some genius insists we walk the panka-whatever trail. OK, let’s kill another hour pretending we’re at the Toledo Zoo. After all, why not? “Because we’re at freakin’ Disney World, not some third-rate, farkin’ zoo!!!” I don’t scream at the top of my lungs while foaming at the mouth. So I smile and point, and grin and point, and seethe and fume, and try to concentrate on Liz and the kids. June 11th would be my two-year anniversary for surviving a rather nasty heart-attack. I check to make sure I’ve got my pills.

So, next, the “Bug’s Life” movie! Somehow or other, we manage to split up from the rest and head over to the tree of life. After an almost interminable wait we’re ushered in. Now, I’ve read the boards and I know this can be kind of intense for the kiddos so I head for what I believe is the back of the theatre. Don’t know why I thought that. TIP: If you have small kids, take the first door on the left; do NOT go to the back of the waiting area. So, we go in and find ourselves in the front row. I’m hoping that this is going to be OK for the kids. It’s not. It’ doesn’t start out that way. They put on the glasses and watch the beginning. The interactive 3-D thing kind of tweaks ‘em but they’re dealing. Then, Hopper shows up. No, wait. Then, the audience screams, the music blares, the monstrously evil Hopper decends menacingly from above, the water squirts, the insecticide fog rolls in and the lights go down to pitch-black. I mean it’s darker than a well-diggers bottom. The screams seem to be deminishing but two are getting louder and we realize they’re our kids. We try to tell them it’s alright but, They Ain’t Havin’ It©. So, as soon as the lights come up, we grab them and get out. If they end up in therapy, I did it.

By that time, it’s after 1pm. Meet up with the outlaws who want to stay. We take the kids back to the suite for lunch and naps. Waiting for the bus, Liz and I look at each other. We know what we’re thinking, and plans are laid. That evening, we’re taking the kids to MK, I don’t care if it’s Gay Day, and I don’t care if anyone else wants to tag along but they better keep up ‘cause time and the Sirman Family waits for no one. That’s why we brought the double stroller. TIP: with small kids, bring your own stroller. The park ones are hard plastic with no cushions and the doubles are side-by-sides rather than a front/back configuration; very difficult to deal with in a crowd. You also can’t take the park strollers out of the park or on to the buses/Monorails/boats.

That evening, Liz, Isabella, Frank and I hit the MK. Oh, Boy! If I did nothing but watch their faces the entire time, it would’ve been worth it. We head for Mickey’s Toon Town and the Teacups. And do we ride the teacups. Not at first of course; after we’ve been standing in line for 10 minutes Isabella announces that she’s scared of them and doesn’t want to ride. I’m prepared for this, I even have a speech. I basically tell her that we love her and would never let her do anything dangerous and there are going to be rides that look scary but when she gets on them she’s going to love them and this is one of them and she’s going to try it. She gets on it. She loves it. She and Frank love it so much that we spend a large part of the evening riding the teacups over and over again.

We try for Mickey’s autograph in the carnival tent but that’s just not possible with the lines. We ride Goofy’s Barnstormer and they love that. By this time, they’re fearless and the “Bug’s Life/Exorcist/TerrorTortureFest” from this morning is forgotten. Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin is also a huge hit and we ride that with fastpasses since it’s so packed. Ride, fun, ride, walk, ride, ice-cream, pouring rain. “The teacups are covered.” Ride, fun, ride. We let them have long naps that afternoon so they could stay up for the fireworks. We’re just not parade people but we thought the kids might like the parade followed by Wishes. Unfortunately, it had been raining all evening and the parade was cancelled. By that time, even with riding around in the stroller, the kids were exhausted so we go back to the suite.

Like so many things in life, the day had a rough start, but a great finish!

It was a good day.

See Sirman - Part I - "The Buffalo Hunt"
 
Excellent report! I can see this is one I will be sad to see end. Can't wait to read more.....................
 
MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE! MORE! MORE!MORE!
:jumping1: :jumping1:
 

I have to agree the toledo zoo is absolutley awsome we are zoo members and tend to go to their sat. classes. although we live a tad closer then u do.
 
Great report :teeth: . By the way, the last time we stayed there(January 2005), the Wilderness Lodge had actual coffee at Roaring Forks. I know, because I asked to see the ground coffee & they showed it to me. (It's also supposed to be 100% Columbian.)


agnes!
 
Fabulous report - I can't wait to get back from my trip to read the rest! It will definitely help me get over my post-WDW depression! Well done!
 
I really don't want this Trip Report to end!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Great trip report can't wait to read the rest. I think we may have the same relatives!!!! We have been many times but are doing our trip in August alone!!!!!!!
 












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