*sigh* I need adivice from the more experieced crowd.

[BrerLizzie]

i wish i had the scanner up so i could show you all the pictures of the school dance I atended this year. I'm in my freshman year and live down the street from this guy. He's been my friend for a couple of years and you know how that goes.. I started to like this guy more and more and here come Sadie Hawkins Dance. To the school, I'm known as the not to ugly, not to pretty little shy girl that no one likes just because I'm not sporty or sexy. With friends though I am stupidly brave and I decide, what do I have to loose? I just ask this guy to the dance. Well, I consult my small group and find out that they are okay with it but Branwen and Ronee both have mild crushes on him, but I saw him first so I got to ask him. I thank them and we all plan a sleep over and I ask him on-line, he said yes and I was overcome with joy. Turns out he likes me and I like him too. What could get in the way now? Only a prettier, smarter girl. Well, that happend. Johnathan took me to the dance and I had a great time. Wish I could show you the pictures. The next day I find out that my best friend since forth grade and him are going out and that he had asked her out a Valentines day. That of coase broke my heart. That isn't the worst of it though. They have been going out formally since March 10th and since then niether one will have anything to do with me. Branwen is now my best friend and she is still friends with the two of them but she was hurt by the two of them too. Help me!!!!! Do boys change? I trust you all.

 

[Briar Rose 7457]

sorry to hear all of this.

do boys change?

well, yes and no.

some grow up. others just get older.

 

[binny]

(((Hugs)))

Do boys ever change? yes most of them do, for the better? not always


The question I would ask you is , why would you want somone who didnt love/like you back?
If he didnt respect you enough to be honest with you about that then he isnt as wonderful as you think he is IMHO


There are so many guys out there yet to come into your life and so many crushes and true loves.



As for the girlfriend, she doesnt sound like she is much of a friend either. You are all learning though what it means to be honest and open with youre friends. And I can bet you wouldnt ever treat someone else like that would you?


Youre going to be just fine, and youre going to get through it I promise. Stick with your true friends and you will be happy

((hugs)) and best wishes!

 

[CEDmom]

I'm really sorry you're hurting. To answer your question, most guys do grow up just like most girls and we all realize that we did some pretty hurtful and stupid things in our younger days.

I can imagine it's hard for you to think beyond the current situation because you've been hurt. The best advice I can offer is to stay true to yourself.

BTW, in my experience the fast girls always burned out young.

 

[honeywolf7]

Like everyone else has said, you have so much time and so much life left ahead of you. This guy just wasn't worth it. (((Hugs)))

 

[Lynn CC]

Here is a big {HUG} for you.

I'm glad you had a nice time at the dance. I personally would just get really busy and forget about him! Enjoy each and every day, life's too short to surround yourself with people that are going to hurt you...physically or emotionally.

Go out and have some fun for yourself!

 

[BrerLizzie]

mehh... he suposidly liked me but he likes the other girl more... cant help but wonder.. do you think when it ends that they are going to both want to be friends again and try and turn me against the other one.
Branwen's theory- Veronica's family doesnt have a lot of money and they dont do alot together as a family, so Veronica is using him for his money and car.
I see the same patern but cant be sure.. seems like all guys are airheaded... this happend in march but it still is bugging me

 

[oddball27]

Yeah, been there, done that, only it was my cousin that decided that she wanted to go out with him!!! Don't worry, you'll get over it. If he is gonna do that to you, he probably doesn't deserve you!! As for the friend, I agree with the comments so far, she doesn't seem like a good friend!! You'll get over it, don't worry!!!!!!!

 

[Minnie824]

I was in the same situation as you when I was in high school...we both liked each other, but since I was shy and the prettier girl came along, nothing ever came of it. Funny thing is, once we were in college, and again out of college, we ran into each other and went on a couple dates. He admitted he liked me, etc. But then I was glad I didn't waste my time with him cuz he wasn't at all my type.

Another story....a friend of mine dated a guy in high school for about a year and then SHE broke up with him. Again, in college I ran into him, and hadn't even spoken to him much in high school, and we dated. She was so mad at me and stopped talking to me. Now this I didn't understand because it was 3 years later and it was her breakup.

Anyway, it probably will bother you for awhile, but chances are they won't be together long and you'll meet someone much better!

 

[evilqueenfan]

My mom once told me "The only thing that ever gets changed on a guy is his diaper".
Like everyone else has said, go out and enjoy youself. Of course it bothers you now but a summer of having fun will make that seem like a distant memory!
((Hugs) to you.

 

[crazyme5kids]

I know you are upset, but I am going to give you something to think about. This boy respected you enough to take you to the dance, he could very easily have told you he changed his mind and gone with your friend. Was the dance before or after Valentines day (sounds like after but I'm not sure). If it was, try to give your friend credit too, she could have ruined the night for you as well and gone with him. Instead try and look at it as two people that knew you were so excited about going to the dance and wanted you to have a great time, which you did! Maybe they didn't handle telling you about them deciding to go out very well, but try and remember that they are young and probably feel a little funny about the situation too.
The best advice I can give you, is take the high road and act like it doesn't matter, even if it is killing you. You will eventually feel better about the whole thing, and maybe see it as it really is. Trust me you have to kiss a lot of frogs before you kiss the one that turns into prince charming.

 

[DocRafiki]

I second crazyme. I'm also confused about who got together with the boy first.

The situation is reminding me of how I lost one of my best friends in high school. This time, I was the girl who started dating the guy that she had a crush on. Honestly, there was never anything between them, and we two had very strong feelings towards each other that grew gradually, so I didn't see why we should ignore that just because my friend had a crush on him. Now I would have been happy to have remained her friend, but she was just so mad that I "stole" him that we never really talked much after that. So, those two might still want to be friends with you. They just might feel awkward or assume you're mad or hate them or something. It's hard when you're young and not used to having heart-to-heart discussions about your feelings. (Oh, and as for men... I'm nearly 30 and most men still have problems telling the truth about their feelings. )

 

[BrerLizzie]

i was with him first.. he's my nieghbor and i asked him to the dance.. (crazyme5kids- he couldn't back out, it was guyz ask girls and the other girl didnt ask not to be rude.. just thought i'd bring that point up since he had no choice other than to say no)
oh yea, and he told me he isnt aloud to talk to me any more cuz i kicked him! i'm 97lbs and have no muskle and he was getting to close and saying he was gonna put me in the locker. hes over twice my wieght! sounds like when i got in trouble for kicking mthew, my other friends boyfriend when he put presure points on me..

 

[jamsmom]

Originally posted by DocRafiki
(Oh, and as for men... I'm nearly 30 and most men still have problems telling the truth about their feelings. )

I could not have said it better!

 

[crazyme5kids]

Ugh, this is all too much for my head LOL. All I can say is thank you...... when I have a day that I am feeling like I am getting a liitle old a post like this reminds me how nice it is to be a little older, and much wiser! Seriously, you will look back at this time of your life and think, "What was I thinking?" The reason for this is you too will be older and wiser. Hope this makes you feel a lttle better (probably not though).