Should men give up their seat to women or children on transportation in Disney?

[MrRomance]

I think the problem with this issue is that people make too many assumptions or have expectations that they really shouldn't.

I was raised to give up my seat for someone who needs it more than I and even though I now have a serious problem with my hip following a car accident, I still do so if I am able. The problem comes when people make assumptions that I'm a perfectly able to give up my seat or expect that I should when there are times that I can't.

Like OP's have pointed out, you would not necessarily know that I am awaiting a hip replacement. I am 40 years old and one might assume that I am in good health and have no physical disability. However, my hip is highly unstable, it dislocates several times a day.

When you are at WDW, you are spending a lot of time walking and pretty muc EVERYONE is aching and tired. When you're carrying an injury or disability, you may need to sit just as much as someone else. My opinion, which may be unpopular is that no one should judge, assume or expect ANYONE to give up their seat because you just don't know if they need it more than you do.

My philosophy is that whoever you are, whether you are elderly, pregnant, disabled, injured etc., YOU have chosen to go to WDW and in doing so, you knew what you were getting into. You know you have to walk a lot, you know you will have your children with you, you know your age, you know you are pregnant, you know you have an injury and you know that you're going to be using the buses. In essence, you chose your situation and you should not judge what other people need or do based on how you are feeling.

Every person at WDW has paid their money, every person at WDW could have a problem you don't know about and every person at WDW chose to be there. If there are no available seats and you need one, don't expect someone you THINK should give up their seat to do so just because in your view they don't need it as much as you. There will always be another bus.

 

[maxiesmom]

do nice things because you're a nice compassionate person, not because you expect to be acknowledged for doing it.

So we can criticize people for not offering their seats to other, but not because some don't have the manners to even say Thank You? I think people who offer their seats to others are doing it because they are compassionate people, but it is inexcusable to not thank them for it.

 

[DisneyWalle]

I think the problem with this issue is that people make too many assumptions or have expectations that they really shouldn't.

I was raised to give up my seat for someone who needs it more than I and even though I now have a serious problem with my hip following a car accident, I still do so if I am able. The problem comes when people make assumptions that I'm a perfectly able to give up my seat or expect that I should when there are times that I can't.

Like OP's have pointed out, you would not necessarily know that I am awaiting a hip replacement. I am 40 years old and one might assume that I am in good health and have no physical disability. However, my hip is highly unstable, it dislocates several times a day.

When you are at WDW, you are spending a lot of time walking and pretty muc EVERYONE is aching and tired. When you're carrying an injury or disability, you may need to sit just as much as someone else. My opinion, which may be unpopular is that no one should judge, assume or expect ANYONE to give up their seat because you just don't know if they need it more than you do.

My philosophy is that whoever you are, whether you are elderly, pregnant, disabled, injured etc., YOU have chosen to go to WDW and in doing so, you knew what you were getting into. You know you have to walk a lot, you know you will have your children with you, you know your age, you know you are pregnant, you know you have an injury and you know that you're going to be using the buses. In essence, you chose your situation and you should not judge what other people need or do based on how you are feeling.

Every person at WDW has paid their money, every person at WDW could have a problem you don't know about and every person at WDW chose to be there. If there are no available seats and you need one, don't expect someone you THINK should give up their seat to do so just because in your view they don't need it as much as you. There will always be another bus.

I personally never judge someone for not offering their seat -- I mean obviously they did stand to wait to load the bus. And I don't believe anyone should expect or demand that someone give up their seat for another. Some disabilities and diseases are seen and others aren't -- I think this is something we should all remember. I just believe for me and my family -- if we are capable of offering our seat or holding a door for someone else -- then it is something we feel is the right thing to do. I would never expect another person to do it just because we do.

 

[DISbob]

I always give up my seat to anyone who looks like they need it, and I actually do have a hidden disability, but I can handle it. My mother always said... "Take a look around, you don't have to look very far to find someone that has it worse than you."

DH doesn't even bother to sit, regardless of how early we board, he just moves to the back of the bus to stand. All of our children are encourage to give up their seat to the very old or very young. It's the way we were raise, and CHOOSE to raise our children.

That said, we don't EXPECT anyone to give up their seat for us, although it would have been nice one time when I was trying to get a sick kid back to the resort by myself, and holding him was making my own problem worse. Ended up sitting him on the bus floor, supporting him between my legs, to keep him from falling over.

You must be from the midwest. We will not let our kids over 5yrs occupy a seat. I will not sit either. As an able-bodied man, I would never be caught sitting with elders standing. . . ever.

 

[Aliceacc]

You must be from the midwest..

Why?

 

[DISbob]

Why?

Common threads.

 

[davedmaine]

Lady to man: sir, i'm pregnant, may I have your seat?
Man: how many months?

 

[davedmaine]

How do you know the others didn't already wait for the next bus just to get a seat? If someone has a sleeping child, maybe they should have left the park a bit earlier so they wouldn't have to carry the sleeping child?

There are all sorts of ways to ensure you get a seat on the bus instead of waiting for someone to give you theirs. You just can't depend on the kindness of strangers when everyone coming out of the park is tired or have a problem standing.

I have two total knee replacements and arthritis in my hip so standing is very difficult for me, but I do it if I want to get on a bus that has no seats left. Otherwise I wait for the next bus.

Perfectly said

 

[maxiesmom]

Lady to man: sir, i'm pregnant, may I have your seat?
Man: how many months?

That is actually part of the reason that this issue will never be resolved in a way that makes everyone happy. I may think a child that is 6 is old enough to stand. Someone else may think a child that is under the age of 8 should keep their seat. I may think anyone over the age of 65 is elderly and deserves a seat. Someone else may think unless you are in your 70s you should offer you seat to others.

Someone may think any pregnant woman deserves a seat. Another person may say unless you are about to give birth you are fine standing. Everyone has their own opinion on who deserves a seat.

 

[crisi]

That is actually part of the reason that this issue will never be resolved in a way that makes everyone happy. I may think a child that is 6 is old enough to stand. Someone else may think a child that is under the age of 8 should keep their seat. I may think anyone over the age of 65 is elderly and deserves a seat. Someone else may think unless you are in your 70s you should offer you seat to others.

Someone may think any pregnant woman deserves a seat. Another person may say unless you are about to give birth you are fine standing. Everyone has their own opinion on who deserves a seat.

It wasn't that long ago that white people "deserved" a seat over black people. Black people had to sit at the back of the bus, but when the bus got full, they were also required to give up their seat for a white person.

 

[Aliceacc]

.

Someone may think any pregnant woman deserves a seat. Another person may say unless you are about to give birth you are fine standing. .

I'm guessing those people have never been pregnant.

 

[lmf77]

I was at Disney with my sister and her 2 kids and my 2 kids. Mine are twins, and they were just over 1 years old at the time so my sister and I each needed to hold one. We got to the bus stop and just a few people were there. By the time the bus came, there was a ton of people there. It took time for us to get ready to board the bus so by the time we got on, almost everyone else who had arrived at the stop after us had already boarded. Thus there were no seats. I thought about waiting for the next bus, but I figured I'd never be able to board fast enough to beat the crowd so I stood and held my son the whole way. It was tough. Luckily my sister was able to get a seat because a nice guy gave it to her. We avoided the buses as much as possible after that. Buses with kids and strollers is way too difficult. Luckily we were able to use the monorail and walk through EPCOT to get back to our resort.

 

[maxiesmom]

I was at Disney with my sister and her 2 kids and my 2 kids. Mine are twins, and they were just over 1 years old at the time so my sister and I each needed to hold one. We got to the bus stop and just a few people were there. By the time the bus came, there was a ton of people there. It took time for us to get ready to board the bus so by the time we got on, almost everyone else who had arrived at the stop after us had already boarded. Thus there were no seats. I thought about waiting for the next bus, but I figured I'd never be able to board fast enough to beat the crowd so I stood and held my son the whole way. It was tough. Luckily my sister was able to get a seat because a nice guy gave it to her. We avoided the buses as much as possible after that. Buses with kids and strollers is way too difficult. Luckily we were able to use the monorail and walk through EPCOT to get back to our resort.

Yeah, you have to be ready to board the bus when it gets there. You should have a bag for all the loose stroller stuff, and make sure you practice collapsing your stroller before going to WDW, so you can quickly do so. It won't take too long, and you will have the hang of it. People won't wait behind you while you get everything organized and folded down.

 

[Sugardimples]

This issue pops up regularly and I think it is really an issue between people who are accustomed to riding public transportation and those who aren't. Public transportation often means you will be standing up, you will wait for a bus to come, it is not as convenient as having your own vehicle. Lots of people at WDW are just not used to this.

If you have small children and strollers, if you can't stand up on a moving vehicle, if you don't have the patience to wait for the next bus, you would probably be better off renting a car.

There are not many seats on a typical WDW bus so more people will be standing than sitting if the bus is full. Know this and then make your decision about how you want to get around.

 

[okeydokey]

I'm guessing those people have never been pregnant.

If I was so pregnant that I could not stand on a bus, I wouldn't think of a Disney vacation as a great choice.

 

[Scurvy]

I'm guessing those people have never been pregnant.

I'm guessing some of them have. I stood on Disney busses when I was 5 months pregnant with no problem at all. While I don't expect everyone to be able to do that, I don't think being pregnant automatically means you need a seat more than anyone else on the bus.

I think giving up your seat for someone who seems to need it more than you do is a nice thing for anyone - male or female - to do. I do not think anyone should feel obligated to give up their seat, however. If someone feels unable to stand on the bus because of pregnancy, injury, exhaustion, having to carry a small child, or any other reason, then I think they need to do whatever they need to do to make sure they get a seat without relying on someone else to give them one. They can wait for a bus that has available seats, they can drive to the park instead of taking the bus, or they take a cab. There are options available. The one thing they should not do is to crowd onto a standing-room only bus and expect someone else to give up their seat. It's entirely possible that the people in those seats already passed on a bus with no free seats and have been waiting to be able to sit down. It's possible that they have reasons that they need the seat as much as you do. It's possible that they are oblivious and tired and don't notice any reason you might not be able to stand, or that they assume you wouldn't have gotten onto a standing room only bus if you needed a seat. In my opinion, if it is crucial that you not stand on the bus, then it is your responsibility to avoid having to stand. It is no one else's responsibility to give up their seat for you.

 

[Kellykins1218]

I don't think young children should have their own seats when the bus is packed. Sit them on your lap and give someone else a chance to sit.

 

[Aliceacc]

I'm guessing some of them have. I stood on Disney busses when I was 5 months pregnant with no problem at all. While I don't expect everyone to be able to do that, I don't think being pregnant automatically means you need a seat more than anyone else on the bus.

I think giving up your seat for someone who seems to need it more than you do is a nice thing for anyone - male or female - to do. I do not think anyone should feel obligated to give up their seat, however. If someone feels unable to stand on the bus because of pregnancy, injury, exhaustion, having to carry a small child, or any other reason, then I think they need to do whatever they need to do to make sure they get a seat without relying on someone else to give them one. They can wait for a bus that has available seats, they can drive to the park instead of taking the bus, or they take a cab. There are options available. The one thing they should not do is to crowd onto a standing-room only bus and expect someone else to give up their seat. It's entirely possible that the people in those seats already passed on a bus with no free seats and have been waiting to be able to sit down. It's possible that they have reasons that they need the seat as much as you do. It's possible that they are oblivious and tired and don't notice any reason you might not be able to stand, or that they assume you wouldn't have gotten onto a standing room only bus if you needed a seat. In my opinion, if it is crucial that you not stand on the bus, then it is your responsibility to avoid having to stand. It is no one else's responsibility to give up their seat for you.

Oh, I agree. I apologize; I quoted poorly. Here's the part I meant to highlight: "Another person may say unless you are about to give birth you are fine standing." I taught a full day of classes the day I went into labor-- I stood all day long, went up and down staircases, had cafeteria duty with 400 kids in it, the works. Then I took my son to the pediatrician, cooked dinner, went to pick up his prescription, and got myself to the chiropractor. And didn't think twice; I did what had to be done that day.

But as someone who has been in those swollen shoes, I would be hesitant to say that someone 9 months pregnant is "fine standing." Should she probably have planned so that they would have a seat? Possibly. But I'm not going to be in a seat while that woman is standing, and neither are any of my kids. I'm not casting aspersions on anyone else on that bus; I have no idea what's going on with them. But no one in my very healthy family is going to sit while she stands.

It's not about anyone else's expectations, it's about my own.

 

[capeseal]

DH and I always offered up our seats to others before we had children. Now, he always stands with the stroller unless there is a seat open after everyone has boarded and I sit with both little ones in my lap unless there is room for them to take up a seat. On our most recent trip, we waited a couple of times for the next bus to be guaranteed a seat because it seemed physically impossible for both DH and I to stand and keep both little ones safe and the stroller secure which wasn't a big deal, we just tried to always be running early to get to reservations . I will say that any time we stayed at Shades of Green and rode a SoG bus, even before we had children, I had men insist that I take their seat.

 

[chrispina]

not every disability is visible, so i know i can't judge a man (or woman) who appears to be able-bodied for not giving up their seat. i just know that i can stand for 10-15 minutes on a bus without too much trauma and i would offer up my seat or put one of my kids in my lap so that someone with a more obvious need (someone holding a baby or small child, someone who is pregnant or elderly or disabled) can have my seat. i would probably side-eye a teenager who was doing cartwheels before getting on the bus but won't give up their seat for someone on crutches.

men can have bad backs and heart conditions and arthritis and tendonitis and lots of other conditions that would make walking through the park at their own pace not too bad, but holding themselves upright on a moving bus pretty unpleasant.