Should I offer to pay for DB's Trip?

[ZekeKelso]

Background: My brother and I make about the same amount of money, but we are in different places financially. He has 3 kids, I have none. He (and DSIL) spend money freely. DW and I are tightwads.

I want to take my nephews to Disney for a short trip (they live near Tampa, I'd be flying down). We've done big family Disney trips in the past, but this would just be a long-weekend jaunt.

My taking the nephews to Disney is going to cost him money. I'm not capable of looking after all 3 of them at once. So that means DB and/or DSIL has to come along too. So they'll have to get a hotel room for the night. And while I'm getting the boys their tickets as "graduation" presents (from kindergarten, 2nd and 4th grade) at least one of DB/DSIL has to help bring them to the parks.

DB is now grumbling about how much the trip is going to cost (1 room, 2 nights in a Value + park tickets for at least one adult.) On the one hand, I feel like I should offer to pick up his expenses too, as this trip was all my idea. On the other hand, the guy makes tons of money, he just spends it all (they just got back from a trip where they flew everyone across country, stayed in an ultra swanky hotel, hired sitters for the kids while mom and dad went to $$$ shows, etc.)

Thoughts???

 

[disneydragon]

Background: My brother and I make about the same amount of money...
as this trip was all my idea...
On the other hand, the guy makes tons of money...

Based on those three things, I think you should offer to pay. Since you make about the same amount of money as your brother, and he makes tons of money, that means you also make tons of money. And the trip was your idea.

 

[MAKmom]

I don't understand why you can not just take all 3 kids yourself unless they are special needs children.

He must have agreed to go to WDW with you I assume...at some point & now is backing out?

If you are taking his kids & you need help you should pay for the help. I think.

 

[ZekeKelso]

I don't understand why you can not just take all 3 kids yourself unless they are special needs children.

Aren't all kids special needs children? Seriously, my hat is off to all parents!

Anyway, I guess I should ask this over in the parents or general theme park forums, but is it possible for one adult to take kids 5, 7 and 9 to a park? The oldest want to go on all the big rides, but can't be trusted by himself yet. The younger ones aren't up for much more than Goofy's Barstormer. Would I drag the younger ones through the line for the big rides, then have the 3 of us take the chicken exit while the 9-year old rides? Doesn't sound like much fun for them. Then I'd have to make the 9-year old go on the kiddie rides (and he loves to tell me he's too big for them.)

Thanks for your thoughts,
Zeke

 

[MAKmom]

Aren't all kids special needs children? Seriously, my hat is off to all parents!

Anyway, I guess I should ask this over in the parents or general theme park forums, but is it possible for one adult to take kids 5, 7 and 9 to a park? The oldest want to go on all the big rides, but can't be trusted by himself yet. The younger ones aren't up for much more than Goofy's Barstormer. Would I drag the younger ones through the line for the big rides, then have the 3 of us take the chicken exit while the 9-year old rides? Doesn't sound like much fun for them. Then I'd have to make the 9-year old go on the kiddie rides (and he loves to tell me he's too big for them.)

Thanks for your thoughts,
Zeke

How tall are they? I see what you are talking about. My girls at 5 went on everything they were the right height for. At 5 & 7 they should be doing Splash & Big thunder for sure. Good Luck.

 

[Hannathy]

I'm not sure why you can't take all three kids either for a short trip. None are in diapers or even preschoolers. And why do you think they all won't want to go on all the rides? my 5 yr old went on everything but RNC and would have if tall enough. There are only 2 rides that I think they wouldn't all go on. They will have a much more memorable trip if the go with you and not have a parent along.


I think that if you are insisting that he come along you should pay but if he is insisting he come then it is up to him. Go alone you'll have much more fun with your nephews alone.

 

[MAKmom]

I just thought of something. If you take just 1 adult with you you can get a Deluxe room for what you will pay for 2 values.

 

[Hannathy]

Forgot to add that the kids will behave 100% better WITHOUT their father being there than if he was along. I know this for a fact from taking nieces and nephews places including Disney.

 

[Disney1fan2002]

Ok, if I am reading the OP correctly, it is your brother and SIL that don't think you can handle the 3 kids?

If that is the case, and they are saying you can't take the kids without them, then just pay for the kids, and let you brother and his wife pay for themselves.

Now, if it is you that thinks you can't handle the kids alone, then I think if you want to take the kids, you should pay for the help.

IMO, I think it is your brother not trusting you with his kids, correct?

 

[Alicnwondrln]

Ok, if I am reading the OP correctly, it is your brother and SIL that don't think you can handle the 3 kids?

If that is the case, and they are saying you can't take the kids without them, then just pay for the kids, and let you brother and his wife pay for themselves.

Now, if it is you that thinks you can't handle the kids alone, then I think if you want to take the kids, you should pay for the help.

IMO, I think it is your brother not trusting you with his kids, correct?

I agree with this, if they are saying one of them has to go let them pay for themselves.
we offered to take my nephew twice last year both times my sister well only if i can come because she thought she would a get a free trip outta it. We told her we wouldnt pay for her and she said we couldnt take him then. She did the same thing to my mom who offered to take him to aruba for a week. He could only go if someone would pay for her to go to.

 

[Buckalew11]

Oh heck, you twisted my arm, I'll go. LOL

BTW, I am thinking it is the OP that is worried about the different ages and interests of the children and not the parents.
And you are correct; just because they are big enough and old enough to do the more thrilling rides does not mean they will. I have taken all my nieces and nephews when they were 7 and up and all of them didn't want to ride the bigger rides.
I think you do need help. For example, what if one of them got sick and needed to stay in the room? If you had help, you could still take the other two into the parks.
(Just so we're clear, if I go with, and one gets sick, I'll take the other 2 into the parks, k? LOL )

Have fun. Oh, and I do think you should offer to pay.

 

[ZekeKelso]

Thanks for all the adivce and questions guys - please keep it coming.

To give further background, everyone was in favor of the trip when it was originally planned. But DB and SIL have gotten some big bills (from their trip, remodeled bedroom, etc.) and are now hemming and hawing and thinking of backing out. If they back out, I don't get to take the kids to Disney. If I offer to pay, I'm sure they'll take the money and we'll have a good time - but I'll feel like a bit of a chump (yeah, he's my brother and I should just pony up. But did I mention I'm a cheapskate?)

I honestly didn't think I could handle all three of them at a park. For further background, when we all went down in December, I had to take the little one out of Cranium Command as he was terrified, and the middle kid almost had a heart attack on the Haunted Mansion. Unless they've done a lot of growing up in the past 5 months, they aren't going on the mountains with their brother.

But you guys have got me thinking I might be able to pull this off by myself. I'll have to think some more...

 

[iloveboardwalk]

Just take your nephews without your brother. They'll love it and behave better for you anyway. You can do things only an Uncle (or Aunt) can do like stay up late and eat ice cream for dinner. Parents just don't feel right doing stuff like that.

 

[camreesmom]

My DDs are 4, 7, and 10 and I wouldn't want to take them to WDW by myself! I think you should definitely take another adult with you. Kids are so quick and can disappear while you turn around just for a second. Just my opinion though. I understand you not wanting to feel like a chump. How about offering to pay for DB's room and park ticket but he has to provide his own spending money.....kind of 50-50????

just a thought.........

~julie

 

[What the Heck]

I'd say pay for the room and the tickets (for one adult and the kids) and all of what the kids need.

Since they live in Florida, will they be going back? What about a special Florida ticket? They can get either a 3 day or a Seasonal if aren't going during a blacked out period.

Also, if you are doing it as a gift for the kids, wouldn't the kids like to have their mom or dad (or both) around? Thinking of it that way might help unstick the wallet.

 

[MAKmom]

Oh heck, you twisted my arm, I'll go. LOL

BTW, I am thinking it is the OP that is worried about the different ages and interests of the children and not the parents.
And you are correct; just because they are big enough and old enough to do the more thrilling rides does not mean they will. I have taken all my nieces and nephews when they were 7 and up and all of them didn't want to ride the bigger rides.
I think you do need help. For example, what if one of them got sick and needed to stay in the room? If you had help, you could still take the other two into the parks.
(Just so we're clear, if I go with, and one gets sick, I'll take the other 2 into the parks, k? LOL )

Have fun. Oh, and I do think you should offer to pay.

You are very funny

 

[gris gris]

I couldn't handle 3 kids at WDW by myself. Why can't your wife go?

 

[MAKmom]

Thanks for all the adivce and questions guys - please keep it coming.

To give further background, everyone was in favor of the trip when it was originally planned. But DB and SIL have gotten some big bills (from their trip, remodeled bedroom, etc.) and are now hemming and hawing and thinking of backing out. If they back out, I don't get to take the kids to Disney. If I offer to pay, I'm sure they'll take the money and we'll have a good time - but I'll feel like a bit of a chump (yeah, he's my brother and I should just pony up. But did I mention I'm a cheapskate?)

I honestly didn't think I could handle all three of them at a park. For further background, when we all went down in December, I had to take the little one out of Cranium Command as he was terrified, and the middle kid almost had a heart attack on the Haunted Mansion. Unless they've done a lot of growing up in the past 5 months, they aren't going on the mountains with their brother.

But you guys have got me thinking I might be able to pull this off by myself. I'll have to think some more...

When did Wonders of Life Reopen? I'm so happy it was closed in June