Should EX help pay for kids vacation?

[HouseofMinnie]

First, I don't need his help paying for our family (me, DS13, DS11) vacation. I have paid for everything and have not asked him to help any other time we have been to WDW. (7 times!!)

Is it reasonable to ask for him to help pay for his kids vacation? He has never taken them anywhere for vacation and he has never mentioned taking them anywhere. I know if he were to take them somewhere I would give them money to spend on things they wanted. Should he contribute to their vacation money?

No flaming please. I am just curious if other single moms get any help from the ex to pay for vacation. What are your thoughts on the subject?

 

[mickeymaker2003]

Nope. If he volunteers to send them with spending money, that's fine. I wouldn't ask for it though. Of course, I wouldn't send much (if any) spending money along for a vacation her dad is taking her on either.

 

[cornflake]

No, if he takes them on vacation, he pays. You do, you pay. It's not like school or a sport or educational activity to which both parents should contribute. This is purely your choice as leisure.

 

[Marionnette]

First, I don't need his help paying for our family (me, DS13, DS11) vacation. I have paid for everything and have not asked him to help any other time we have been to WDW. (7 times!!)

Is it reasonable to ask for him to help pay for his kids vacation? He has never taken them anywhere for vacation and he has never mentioned taking them anywhere. I know if he were to take them somewhere I would give them money to spend on things they wanted. Should he contribute to their vacation money?

No flaming please. I am just curious if other single moms get any help from the ex to pay for vacation. What are your thoughts on the subject?

I think that it's great that you have been able to provide your children with nice vacations without the help of your ex. But taking a Disney vacation is your choice and your expense. Your ex has no obligation to pay for the girls' trip. If he offers to give them spending money, then fine. But don't expect it or ask for it.

 

[bumbershoot]

My mom and dad never contributed to the other one taking us anywhere. And I don't remember having souvenir money from one parenting while vacationing with the other; it was expected that the parent in charge of the vacation would provide that.


Of course, it would have been lovely if it had been otherwise, but my parents did not have anything like a lovely divorce, so that sort of thing wasn't expected.

 

[ancestry]

No, if he takes them on vacation, he pays. You do, you pay. It's not like school or a sport or educational activity to which both parents should contribute. This is purely your choice as leisure.

I completely agree! Vacations are not essential and neither spouse should be required to pay for a kids vacation. If you want to take them you pay.

 

[akcire]

First, I don't need his help paying for our family (me, DS13, DS11) vacation. I have paid for everything and have not asked him to help any other time we have been to WDW. (7 times!!)

Is it reasonable to ask for him to help pay for his kids vacation? He has never taken them anywhere for vacation and he has never mentioned taking them anywhere. I know if he were to take them somewhere I would give them money to spend on things they wanted. Should he contribute to their vacation money?

No flaming please. I am just curious if other single moms get any help from the ex to pay for vacation. What are your thoughts on the subject?

Not unless you are inviting him to come along on the vaction. If he vacationed with you, then he could cover half the kids costs. If you vacation alone with the kids, it's on your dime.

 

[Patience]

I am not divorced but one of my sisters is. Her ex has never paid for her to take their kids on vacation nor does she expect him to.

 

[kimsuenew]

Absolutely not. Whichever parent chooses to go on vacation foots the bill. If the other parent wishes to provide a bit of spending money to the kids that would be their choice, if not... that is their choice as well!

 

[burnurcomputer]

The child support that my ex pays goes toward the cost to care of them. Asking an ex to pay for part of a vacation is going beyond what I would consider the norm. If the trip was part of a school function, be it a class trip or music days, then I might ask for him to consider it even thought it goes beyond his legal responibility in my state. If we were selling something to fund raise for the above senario, I would be calling him first.

 

[ilovemk76]

First, I don't need his help paying for our family (me, DS13, DS11) vacation. I have paid for everything and have not asked him to help any other time we have been to WDW. (7 times!!)

Is it reasonable to ask for him to help pay for his kids vacation? He has never taken them anywhere for vacation and he has never mentioned taking them anywhere. I know if he were to take them somewhere I would give them money to spend on things they wanted. Should he contribute to their vacation money?

No flaming please. I am just curious if other single moms get any help from the ex to pay for vacation. What are your thoughts on the subject?

You really have to ask this question? The answer is NO. You chose to take a vacation so you get to pay for it.

 

[VAfamily1998]

Like everyone else, I say no.

The exception I think would be is if it were a school/sports team trip...

 

[girli565]

No, if he takes them on vacation, he pays, and if you take them, you pay. I wouldn't expect my father to pay for vacations my mother and stepfather took me on.

 

[Kellydelly]

I don't think your ex should pay for any of your vacation expenses with your sons. I do think he should pay half for school trips/activities that you both agree on.

 

[Phil'sFrontier]

I am not a single Mom. I do live with one though. My girlfriend of 7 years has a ten year old who I am not the father of. I have know this child since she turned 3. Her Father has never paid child support consistently. Just a few hundred here or there.

I think what you are asking is unreasonable. Also assuming that you would need to give them money for them to spend on holidays is kind of rude I think too. I mean if I were in his shoes and put in that position it would be a little uncomfortable.

Honestly I can't even believe you need to ask a question like this and I really question your character, and motive.

 

[Pakey]

My ex-husband never contributed to our vacations, nor would I have expected him to. A vacation is a luxury, there are many married people who can't afford to vacation or choose not to spend their money on something they consider frivolous.

I never expected my ex to pay for anything outside the scope of his court mandated responsibilities.

 

[It'sWDW4me]

Nope, not at all.

It would be NICE if the ex would give his kid(s) some spending money for their vacation but it certainly isn't mandatory nor would I even think of asking him to do that.

 

[happygirl]

Yes, you can ask him but don't be mad if he says NO

 

[Zim]

FWIW, I've been divorced amicably for years. He's not a vacation planner and so when neither of us are in a serious relationship, I invite him to go and flip half the bill. It helps me out financially, he has some vacation memories with the kids and with all hotels providing two double beds, it's never been awkward - the kids sleep with me.

I don't think most divorces end on such amicable terms though, so I think I'm the odd man out here. But you really can't ask him to pay for the vacation any more than you could ask him to pay for you and the kids to eat out at expensive restaurants every night.

 

[North of Mouse]

I am not a single Mom. I do live with one though. My girlfriend of 7 years has a ten year old who I am not the father of. I have know this child since she turned 3. Her Father has never paid child support consistently. Just a few hundred here or there.

I think what you are asking is unreasonable. Also assuming that you would need to give them money for them to spend on holidays is kind of rude I think too. I mean if I were in his shoes and put in that position it would be a little uncomfortable.

Honestly I can't even believe you need to ask a question like this and I really question your character, and motive.

Questioning her character and motive is sort of harsh, isn't it, she actually asked "no flaming" and this seems to be just that IMO. Also, Kellydelly, she has sons, not daughters