Screaming children will not be tolerated!

[sunnyday123]

It's a discussion...and a sharing of thoughts and experiences. I chose to share my opinions. I would hope that could be done with respect and not in a condesending manner.
I believed your reply was argumentative in nature. It was "inferred". Perhaps wrongly... then perhaps much same way you seem to think I "inferred" that only day care kids scream in restaurants. Let me make this clear..I do NOT think only daycare children scream in restaurants. That's just ridiculous.
I am sorry if you were offended or objected to my post. Certainly, that was not my intent AT ALL.

Nope, not offended at all, nor was it argumentative, or intended to be. I am well aware of what a discussion as well. You stated your opinion, and I stated mine.

 

[handinpocket]

Then maybe you never take the child to the grocery store! Why do I have to suffer. Sorry if they can't be in store then you don't bring them and get a sitter. being a parent means making sacrifices and not always dong things exactly the way you would like to or easiest.

Sorry, it doesn't work that way. Grocery stores would never evict a crying child, not everyone can just get a sitter. So, yes, you will have to suffer if a child starts crying and you don't want to leave.

 

[FergieTCat]

Sorry, it doesn't work that way. Grocery stores would never evict a crying child, not everyone can just get a sitter. So, yes, you will have to suffer if a child starts crying and you don't want to leave.

No, I'll just frequent restaurants with signs that specifically state that screaming children will not be tolerated.

Nice of you to absolve the parents of any responsibility, though.

 

[Scurvy]

But I'm sure it didn't stop people in that store from making snap judgments.

Maybe not. Though I suspect most people who saw a distressed child and parent lingering around a pharmacy would assume that the child was probably sick, and since most people wouldn't voluntarily make their sick child go to the store they would probably realize that the parent didn't have much choice in the matter. I know that's what I would assume.

Do kids with disabilities need to learn the same rules as everyone else? YES! I'd agree with that wholeheartedly. Do the same strategies work to teach them that work for other kids? No, not always. Sometimes teaching you toddler not to scream in the grocery store looks like starting with very short trips, at not crowded times, when he's not hungry or tired, and knowing that he/she's still going to cry and that you'll need to ignore it so he learns it doesn't work.

Obviously different things work best with different children. If a child finds the store to be a frightening or terrible place, and is unable to comprehend that misbehaving in the store will actually cause them to have to stay there longer, or has such a phobia of the store that he's literally unable to control his reaction to it, and the parent can not leave the child with someone else, then it may be unavoidable for the parent to annoy their fellow shoppers. In that case (which I imagine would be very rare) then I guess they'll just have to put up with angry looks or comments from the people who have no choice but to put up with the annoyance. But I would hope that the parent would do everything they could to limit their effect on the other shoppers, such as doing the bolded.

Of course that really only applies to stores, since no one ever has to eat in a restaurant. I imagine that's why you don't see signs in groceries like the one in the restaurant in question. Stores tend to tolerate quite a bit more from kids than some restaurants do. I have seen a parent told to leave a store before when their child was misbehaving, so it does happen. I doubt that a grocery store would evict a parent and child simply because the child was crying quietly, though a higher end store might. And even a grocery store would evict a child if the child's behavior was egregious enough.

 

[handinpocket]

No, I'll just frequent restaurants with signs that specifically state that screaming children will not be tolerated.

Nice of you to absolve the parents of any responsibility, though.

I said G-R-O-C-E-R-Y store, not restaurant. Sometimes a parent can not help if a child is crying and can not stop the crying at a given time. Children are part of society and should be embraced as such. I can understand not wanting to sit through a meal with a child crying, but in other situations, for the most part, I believe people could be more understanding.

 

[Hannathy]

Sorry, it doesn't work that way. Grocery stores would never evict a crying child, not everyone can just get a sitter. So, yes, you will have to suffer if a child starts crying and you don't want to leave.

Yes everyone can get a sitter they just may not want to.

And it is a shame that the parent wouldn't take it upon themselves to evict themselves if the child is screaming not leave it to the store to have to do.

Hence: WHY the restaurant had to have the sign in the first place, because of attitudes like this.

 

[Hannathy]

I said G-R-O-C-E-R-Y store, not restaurant. Sometimes a parent can not help if a child is crying and can not stop the crying at a given time. Children are part of society and should be embraced as such. I can understand not wanting to sit through a meal with a child crying, but in other situations, for the most part, I believe people could be more understanding.

You may not be able to stop the crying but you can deal with it by leaving

 

[allison443]

I'm willing to bet that a great majority of kids having meltdowns in grocery stores are just out of control whiney brats with parents that refuse to deal with the problem - not kids with ADHD, Autism or whatever label you choose to put on them. (And that's not an excuse either.)

I agree, whenever someone posts a complaint about a situation someone will come up with a scenario with all these extenuating circumstances.

Like the poster with the child crying in the pharmacy, who just had surgery, was exhausted, was starving, was forbidden to eat anything till they got home, plus there was a mix up with prescription, so she had to call the hospital, plus they had no car...I believe all these things were true in that poster's case and she was in a tough situation, but seriously what are the odds? That was an exceptional case, and I would hope most people would be tolerant of a kid crying while waiting at a pharmacy.

 

[Wishing on a star]

There is a HUGE difference between a grocery store and a sit-down restaurant.

In fact, there is a HUGE difference between a place where one must inevitably find themselves (with or without children) and a sit down restaurant....

And, good lord, if there is a mother who has NO option for her child, ever, period... not day care, not grandma, not the child's father... NOBODY.... to enable her to do the tasks that she needs to do... If she is living her entire existence, 24/7 with a shrieking child. Then, all I have is pity for her, and wonder about her ability to handle life and the responsibilities of being a fit parent. But, clearly, 99.99% of the time, this is NOT the case.

God, these 'discussions' show just how incredibly one sided and insane people can become, trying to justify extremist attitudes.

My point being, bringing a shrieking child into a restaurant... (anywhere one's but hits the seat, as opposed to a drive-thru, etc...) is a CHOICE.
Allowing a child, even one with disability, to shreik, is a CHOICE.

Heck, many times, ending up at a store, long enough to end up with a shreiking child, is a CHOICE.

So, yes, I can understand a crying baby.... I understand how HARD it can be sometimes to be the mother/parent of a baby or very very young child..... I think we've all been there, and we DO have empathy.

I think we all know that 99.99% of the time, being subjected to a shrieking child is nothing but the result of very poor choices and/or very poor parenting.
And, again, NOTE: this is coming from somebody who abhors 'parent-bashing'.

PS: we went to lunch as we were out on business today... My son was with us... We sat next to large family group with like SIX kids.... I never once heard one loud word or shriek....
News Flash.... Children do NOT inherently mean inevitable and excusable auditory assault in public.

 

[wvjules]

There is a HUGE difference between a grocery store and a sit-down restaurant.

In fact, there is a HUGE difference between a place where one must inevitably find themselves (with or without children) and a sit down restaurant....

And, good lord, if there is a mother who has NO option for her child, ever, period... not day care, not grandma, not the child's father... NOBODY.... to enable her to do the tasks that she needs to do... If she is living her entire existence, 24/7 with a shrieking child. Then, all I have is pity for her, and wonder about her ability to handle life and the responsibilities of being a fit parent. But, clearly, 99.99% of the time, this is NOT the case.

God, these 'discussions' show just how incredibly one sided and insane people can become, trying to justify extremist attitudes.

My point being, bringing a shreiking child into a restaurant... (anywhere one's but hits the seat, as opposed to a drive-thru, etc...) is a CHOICE. Allowing a child, even one with disability, to shreik, is a CHOICE.

Heck, many times, ending up at a store, long enough to end up with a shreiking child, is a CHOICE.

So, yes, I can understand a crying baby.... I understand how HARD it can be sometimes to be the mother/parent of a baby or very very young child..... I think we've all been there, and we DO have empathy.

I think we all know that 99.99% of the time, being subjected to a shrieking child is nothing but a very poor choices and/or very poor parenting.

PS: we went to lunch as we were out on business today... My son was with us... We sat next to large family group with like SIX kids.... I never once heard one loud word or shriek.... News Flash.... Children do NOT inherently mean inevitable and excusable auditory assault in public.

Has anyone said that all children do?

 

[JerseyJanice]

Not only should the parents have been asked to leave, they should have been presented with a bill for the damage caused by their son. Yes, kids may be kids, but a business shouldn't have to pay for those kid's actions. If more parents had to pay for a destructive child's behavior, perhaps we'd have fewer of these kinds of incidents.

But how many of these incidents are actually happening? Where are you people eating that a sign like this is actually necessary?

Sometimes getting involved in a Dis thread is like stepping into a parallel world. I don't see screaming, out-of-control 'snowflake' children at restaurants or grocery stores often; I read about them here a lot though.

I'm home two weeks now from a week at WDW. During six table service meals, I do NOT recall a single incident where a child was screaming and needed to be brought outside.

 

[Wishing on a star]

JerseyJanice...

Yes, it is happening....
Enough to make this whole topic a huge, ongoing, national discussion.
This story about this restaurant is starting go big-time.

Something tells me that if you did not notice this during your trip... there are two reasons...

1. you are one of the very very fortunate few who only hear what you want to hear.

2. It IS September.... My guess is that there are very, VERY, low numbers of children out right now, as schools are back in session.

PS: I LOVE traveling in May or September... There is just NO way to underestimate the huge and wonderful difference that traveling during these two months can make.

Our last trip, this Spring, extended past Memorial day.... OMG what a complete and total different experience during that time-frame. This was also a repeat trip, where DH and I had been a few years ago in the month of September. UNBELIEVABLE.... Just NO comparison. Yes. parallel world/universe.

 

[EMom]

But how many of these incidents are actually happening? Where are you people eating that a sign like this is actually necessary?

Sometimes getting involved in a Dis thread is like stepping into a parallel world. I don't see screaming, out-of-control 'snowflake' children at restaurants or grocery stores often; I read about them here a lot though.

I'm home two weeks now from a week at WDW. During six table service meals, I do NOT recall a single incident where a child was screaming and needed to be brought outside.

During our Dec. 2009 trip, we we eating lunch at Mama Melrose when a little girl (about 6 years old) started to pitch a SUPREME fit. The fit of all fits. Screaming, yelling, crying....You name it. DH and I gave each other the, "Oh boy, there goes our peaceful lunch" look. Then, an unexpected.....but indeed necessary......thing happened. The dad stood up, picked the girl up by one arm and one leg, put her over his shoulder and carried her out of that restaurant so that the rest of his familly AND the other diners could eat in the peace we deserved. They did not return.

I love that man.

 

[LilyWDW]

But how many of these incidents are actually happening? Where are you people eating that a sign like this is actually necessary?

Sometimes getting involved in a Dis thread is like stepping into a parallel world. I don't see screaming, out-of-control 'snowflake' children at restaurants or grocery stores often; I read about them here a lot though.

I'm home two weeks now from a week at WDW. During six table service meals, I do NOT recall a single incident where a child was screaming and needed to be brought outside.

I've dealt with screaming, out of control children before. I have personally asked their parents to please leave the store unless they can get control of their children. I have had to do this multiple times since I started working retail. I have personally seen restaurants request that parents get their kids under control or leave.

It does happen. Just because it does not happen to you does not mean that the rest of us are making stuff up. Until you DO deal with it, then it doesn't seem like that big of a deal... but when you finally do run into it, well, good luck.

 

[JerseyJanice]

Actually, we were there in August. The 20th through the 27th and it was packed. I believe that Southern classes were back in session then, but the place was full of NJ/NYC/Philly people. And Canadians--lots of them.

Disney was the second most crowded I've ever seen it, and I can't recall a single incident of kids misbehaving. When I noticed about other people's kids was their Princess costumes and hair-do's. The glitter spray and hair extensions are something else! I also noticed lots of loving gestures between family members. Parents holding their children, smiling at them, that kind of thing.

Screaming, yelling, destroying by kids--I don't know. I just can't recall seeing any of that.

 

[Jennasis]

But how many of these incidents are actually happening? Where are you people eating that a sign like this is actually necessary?
.

So last night DH and I went to eat at a local pizza place. Not fancy at all, but lots of tables. There was DH and I, then a mom/dad/4year old, then another grandmother and a 7 year old, then anther small family with an 8 year old.

Well the 4 year old and 7 year old (who were strangers to each other) are chasing each other around the restaurant, screaming and laughing. Throwing things at each other. The parents were completely ignoring them, absorbed in their own conversation. When their food came, the boys returned to their respective booths, where they stood on the benches engaged in a screaming match with each other across the room. Parents never said a word. Eventually the 7 year old wandered over to the 4 year old's booth and invited HIMSELF to sit with the family. The mother looked over at the boy's grandma and said "Is it okay with you?"....grandma shrugged and says "sure". So the kid climbs into the booth with these strangers, asks the 4 year old his name and then asks if he can have some of their food!!!

The mom says "Sure" and hands him her fork!!!

DH and I were just dying. We were trying to eat as quickly as possible so we could get out of there.

Then the boys decided they wanted to go back over to the grandmother's table, where grandma was fishing through her purse for money for the check. The 4 year old (NOT HER KID remember?) demands she give them money for the gumball machine! She blinks at him and says "OK".

Gang, it was the weirdest, most obnoxiously snowflakey thing I've seen in a long time.

Quoting JJ and myself, so she can see...they could've used a sign last night!

 

[minkydog]

I'm willing to bet that a great majority of kids having meltdowns in grocery stores are just out of control whiney brats with parents that refuse to deal with the problem - not kids with ADHD, Autism or whatever label you choose to put on them. (And that's not an excuse either.)

ANd I think you are right on the money. A lot of parents are simply too entitled and their snowflakes are too. Their little princess/pirate is just TOO PRECIOUS and the rest of us just better learn to deal with it. How do I know this? I have two sisters who have children just like this. One of them has actually said, to my face!, "I work hard all day, I don't want to come home and waste my time on discipline." Yeah...that would explain why your kid is totally out of control and why you all are not invited to visit me anymore. To hear some people tell it, every kid in public has Aspergers or ADHD or anxiety or some other special situation. Considering that those children actually comprise a fairly small minority, what's going on with the rest of these little heathens?

 

[Lanshark]

When I go to a restaurant or movie theatre I have an expectation that I can enjoy my dinner/movie without hearing constant screaming.

When I took my children to these establishments they knew that the expectation would be that they would behave. Did they always comply; the vast majority of the time they did? Did we remove them as a basic consideration to everyone else if they didn't; yes?

 

[chloelovesdisney]

Actually, we were there in August. The 20th through the 27th and it was packed. I believe that Southern classes were back in session then, but the place was full of NJ/NYC/Philly people. And Canadians--lots of them.

Disney was the second most crowded I've ever seen it, and I can't recall a single incident of kids misbehaving. When I noticed about other people's kids was their Princess costumes and hair-do's. The glitter spray and hair extensions are something else! I also noticed lots of loving gestures between family members. Parents holding their children, smiling at them, that kind of thing.

Screaming, yelling, destroying by kids--I don't know. I just can't recall seeing any of that.

I read your restaurant reviews (excellent btw) and I think what may be helping you to tune out the kids, is your cocktail or two at dinner each night.

 

[JerseyJanice]

I read your restaurant reviews (excellent btw) and I think what may be helping you to tune out the kids, is your cocktail or two at dinner each night.

Thank you for the compliment! (I think.) I don't drink as much at home as I do on vacation, and I've been trying to remember the last time a child's behavior annoyed me in public. It was probably in church during Mass, but I cut parents at Mass some slack. Getting kids to behave during Mass is not easy. I think if you can do that with a kid, you have pretty much conquered that child.