School Pick Up Car Mishap. How Would You React?

[fly girl]

Well, I am putting myself out here for the wolves.

Today I was picking up dd from school. The drill for pick up is you text your kid the parking spot number you're in and they meet you. No biggie. I typically park in the same area and today was no different. I wound up head first today because the spot in front of the one I usually take was open, making leaving easy. (FWIW, I am not a back in gal. I am not good at it, but if I can pull forward to be head first I will do it.) At the time of my pull up, the car to my left was an unoccupied car (staff or someone visiting school) and to the right, an open spot. About 4 minutes later a mom with an elementary school child pulls into the empty space on my right, going in head first so her trunk was at my front.

When she pulled in, I noticed how close she was to me. However, those spaces aren't wide so this is nothing new.

Fast forward...

I am still waiting for dd.

I see 3 girls getting into the car with the mom and child. Two of the girls get into the backseat on the other side of the car, the third one on my side. She SLAMS the door HARD into my car. She makes a gasp, then laughs. The laugh ... a laugh ... just why? So seeing that didn't make me pleased. In fact, it made me mad. How is that funny? Ugh! So I unrolled my window with a loud and stern voice and said, "How bad did you just hit my car!?" And I got out to assess the damage.

Naturally, the mom driver (who is not of relation to this kid) got out when she saw I got out. No problem with that, I would have done the same. The issue? She defended the kid! Told me there was no need to yell at her. Did you not see and hear what just transpired? Did you not want to check your own car for damage? She opened that door like there was no car within 10 feet. And yet, still no apology. So I looked and said, "This, this is why I yelled!" and I showed the dent in my car. And her response was, "Well, what do you want to do about it?" Still, no apology.

All I really wanted was an I'm sorry. Some accountability. At 15-16 years old, you know to watch when you open a car door. I got a half hearted one eventually, but seriously I was made out to be the bad guy because I raised my voice to this teenager I didn't know.

Are you kidding me?? I'm dumbfounded my raised voiced (which wasn't even a true yell) was the considered the true offense.

My kid came after all this was done and over, but she saw the girls and knows who they are, sophomores.

Am I bummed about the dent? Yeah, but at the end of the day it is just a car.

Do I think I could have handled it better? Maybe. But really is a raised voice to get a girl who laughed at damaging my car a horrible thing? IMHO, no. Hopefully, my yelling will make her think next time before being so careless. I don't know.

But it is now coming up on 9pm, six hours after, and I am still irritated at how that mom made me out to be the villain. What the ...

So here I am, putting myself out for the slaughter. WWYD? Thoughts.

 

[Turn the Page]

School pick up line is the worst. Ours is a nightmare. I have seen SO many near misses in that cesspool of a parking lot.

I would probably have done the same thing you did. Unfortunately too few people want to take accountability for their actions anymore.

 

[fly girl]

School pick up line is the worst. Ours is a nightmare. I have seen SO many near misses in that cesspool of a parking lot.

I would probably have done the same thing you did. Unfortunately too few people want to take accountability for their actions anymore.

Cesspool of a parking lot ... beautifully worded! I hate both drop off and pick up, but pick up is worse.

 

[nw6675]

School pickups are almost as bad as leaving a Southen Baptist church on a Sunday morning (guilty!).

I 100% understand how it made you feel and why you reacted that way. Yelling at her, well, that might not have been the best, but she probably needed to be made aware. It is just a dent, but there needs to be accountability and awareness in this world. It's too bad it wasn't her mom driving!

But, I'm frustrated at the driver parking that close, too!

 

[Disneylover99]

I would have said something too. The laugh would have ticked me right off. So I don’t blame you.

 

[Living42Day]

Nope, I just did the same thing yesterday. One of our neighborhood girls (probably 10-11 years old) ran up into my yard after a squirrel, picked up a rock and threw it at the squirrel. Except it missed the squirrel and hit my car. I was putting in windshield wiper fluid into our other car at the time and it flew past my head, almost hitting me before hitting just under the window. I said, "That just hit our car!" and she ran over and said sorry and did it dent. I said, I don't know but DO NOT EVER THROW ROCKS AGAIN. I repeated it, again and she took off the same way she came on her scooter. I was furious, never yelled just had a much more stern voice than normal.

What kind of mini psychopath throws a rock at a squirrel? Not the first time she's hit our car with a rock, either. Luckily this time I was outside to confront it.

 

[Living42Day]

Also - the parents of the kid in my scenario are not exactly present so this was the first time she probably heard a stern voice.

In your scenario, it was made so much worse by her laughing. Don't feel bad at all for calling it out! You should have got the mom's insurance info though.

 

[GAN]

Well, I am putting myself out here for the wolves.

Today I was picking up dd from school. The drill for pick up is you text your kid the parking spot number you're in and they meet you. No biggie. I typically park in the same area and today was no different. I wound up head first today because the spot in front of the one I usually take was open, making leaving easy. (FWIW, I am not a back in gal. I am not good at it, but if I can pull forward to be head first I will do it.) At the time of my pull up, the car to my left was an unoccupied car (staff or someone visiting school) and to the right, an open spot. About 4 minutes later a mom with an elementary school child pulls into the empty space on my right, going in head first so her trunk was at my front.

When she pulled in, I noticed how close she was to me. However, those spaces aren't wide so this is nothing new.

Fast forward...

I am still waiting for dd.

I see 3 girls getting into the car with the mom and child. Two of the girls get into the backseat on the other side of the car, the third one on my side. She SLAMS the door HARD into my car. She makes a gasp, then laughs. The laugh ... a laugh ... just why? So seeing that didn't make me pleased. In fact, it made me mad. How is that funny? Ugh! So I unrolled my window with a loud and stern voice and said, "How bad did you just hit my car!?" And I got out to assess the damage.

Naturally, the mom driver (who is not of relation to this kid) got out when she saw I got out. No problem with that, I would have done the same. The issue? She defended the kid! Told me there was no need to yell at her. Did you not see and hear what just transpired? Did you not want to check your own car for damage? She opened that door like there was no car within 10 feet. And yet, still no apology. So I looked and said, "This, this is why I yelled!" and I showed the dent in my car. And her response was, "Well, what do you want to do about it?" Still, no apology.

All I really wanted was an I'm sorry. Some accountability. At 15-16 years old, you know to watch when you open a car door. I got a half hearted one eventually, but seriously I was made out to be the bad guy because I raised my voice to this teenager I didn't know.

Are you kidding me?? I'm dumbfounded my raised voiced (which wasn't even a true yell) was the considered the true offense.

My kid came after all this was done and over, but she saw the girls and knows who they are, sophomores.

Am I bummed about the dent? Yeah, but at the end of the day it is just a car.

Do I think I could have handled it better? Maybe. But really is a raised voice to get a girl who laughed at damaging my car a horrible thing? IMHO, no. Hopefully, my yelling will make her think next time before being so careless. I don't know.

But it is now coming up on 9pm, six hours after, and I am still irritated at how that mom made me out to be the villain. What the ...

So here I am, putting myself out for the slaughter. WWYD? Thoughts.

If The dent was something significant I’d want it fixed -and would have took pictures got the drivers info and/or file A police report for insurance purposes.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I have a good size ding in my door and it bothers me every time I get in my car. It happened in the garage at work, but I don’t know who did it. It just appeared one day.

I definitely would’ve said something, too, and gotten out to see how bad the damage was. I spent a lot of time teaching my kids to be careful getting in the car when it’s close to other cars.

Unfortunately, I think she’s liable if you have proof she did it, right? (Well, her car was involved.)

@Living42Day With the rock, I would’ve told her she could “poke someone’s eye out” that way! (Which actually happened to someone my DH works with.)

 

[Southernmiss]

Sorry this happened.

15/16 years old, it was probably a nervous or embarrassed laugh

 

[fly girl]

If The dent was something significant I’d want it fixed -and would have took pictures got the drivers info and/or file A police report for insurance purposes.

Thankfully, it was very small. I am letting it go.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I think there are some kids who grew up with minivans with sliding doors who may not understand the damage they can do to other cars with swinging car doors. Maybe this girl was one of them.

 

[fly girl]

Sorry this happened.

15/16 years old, it was probably a nervous or embarrassed laugh

She didn't know I was in the car, until I unrolled the window. Like I said, oblivious to anything around her.

I have a 15 year old daughter myself. It definitely didn't sound like nervous laugh. It sounded like an oopsie my bad, ha ha ha ha.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Thankfully, it was very small. I am letting it go.

Maybe it can be buffed out if it’s really small?

 

[fly girl]

I think there are some kids who grew up with minivans with sliding doors who may not understand the damage they can do to other cars with swinging car doors. Maybe this girl was one of them.

Possibly. But by that age they had to have sat in the front seat by now. IDK, it is a good point but I'd be more subject to give grace over it if she was 11-12.

(too soon, still bitter. )

 

[fly girl]

Maybe it can be buffed out if it’s really small?

It took a small sliver of paint but I bet dh can work some magic. It still is small. I have to let it go. In the scheme of life it is really nothing.



...and don't you love how I am bitter in the last post but letting it go in this one. I will eye roll myself on that!

 

[brockash]

Well, I am putting myself out here for the wolves.

Today I was picking up dd from school. The drill for pick up is you text your kid the parking spot number you're in and they meet you. No biggie. I typically park in the same area and today was no different. I wound up head first today because the spot in front of the one I usually take was open, making leaving easy. (FWIW, I am not a back in gal. I am not good at it, but if I can pull forward to be head first I will do it.) At the time of my pull up, the car to my left was an unoccupied car (staff or someone visiting school) and to the right, an open spot. About 4 minutes later a mom with an elementary school child pulls into the empty space on my right, going in head first so her trunk was at my front.

When she pulled in, I noticed how close she was to me. However, those spaces aren't wide so this is nothing new.

Fast forward...

I am still waiting for dd.

I see 3 girls getting into the car with the mom and child. Two of the girls get into the backseat on the other side of the car, the third one on my side. She SLAMS the door HARD into my car. She makes a gasp, then laughs. The laugh ... a laugh ... just why? So seeing that didn't make me pleased. In fact, it made me mad. How is that funny? Ugh! So I unrolled my window with a loud and stern voice and said, "How bad did you just hit my car!?" And I got out to assess the damage.

Naturally, the mom driver (who is not of relation to this kid) got out when she saw I got out. No problem with that, I would have done the same. The issue? She defended the kid! Told me there was no need to yell at her. Did you not see and hear what just transpired? Did you not want to check your own car for damage? She opened that door like there was no car within 10 feet. And yet, still no apology. So I looked and said, "This, this is why I yelled!" and I showed the dent in my car. And her response was, "Well, what do you want to do about it?" Still, no apology.

All I really wanted was an I'm sorry. Some accountability. At 15-16 years old, you know to watch when you open a car door. I got a half hearted one eventually, but seriously I was made out to be the bad guy because I raised my voice to this teenager I didn't know.

Are you kidding me?? I'm dumbfounded my raised voiced (which wasn't even a true yell) was the considered the true offense.

My kid came after all this was done and over, but she saw the girls and knows who they are, sophomores.

Am I bummed about the dent? Yeah, but at the end of the day it is just a car.

Do I think I could have handled it better? Maybe. But really is a raised voice to get a girl who laughed at damaging my car a horrible thing? IMHO, no. Hopefully, my yelling will make her think next time before being so careless. I don't know.

But it is now coming up on 9pm, six hours after, and I am still irritated at how that mom made me out to be the villain. What the ...

So here I am, putting myself out for the slaughter. WWYD? Thoughts.

Definitely stinks, but I wouldn't have said anything, especially to the teen. - Maybe the adult, but it would have been polite.

As far as the laugh, unfortunately a lot of ppl., especially teens laugh when they're uncomfortable so it certainly could have been that.

I will say a few ago I was working at an elementary school and had a similar situation; a 5th grader opened his door and hit another 5th graders dads car - not really hard, but did hit it due to how close they were and not paying attention I'm sure. We ended up having to call the police on the dad due to his actions in the middle of our parking lot (wasn't that surprising he had a history of some extreme behavior.) Both boys came in crying...certainly not a fun way to start the day.

 

[sam_gordon]

Did you over react? Maybe a little. But I don't fault you. I also probably would have gotten out of the car to see what damage. I don't know that I would have yelled. It depends on lot on my mood at the time. I would have liked to think I would be quick enough on my feet (probably not) to ask for the girl's name because I want to talk to her parents about having insurance pay for the repair (even if it was small enough I wouldn't mess with). I would just want to scare her a little.

 

[tvguy]

OT but, it always amazes me how working parents get time off work to pick up their kids at school every day. I know many things have changed in the world and schools since I was a kid, but the only time I remember my dad picking me up at school a kid on the playground called it to the attention of the teacher who was monitoring the playground thinking someone was kidnapping me!. Kid walked, rode their bikes or took the school bus in those days, seeing a parent there was not common.

 

[FreeTime]

OT but, it always amazes me how working parents get time off work to pick up their kids at school every day. I know many things have changed in the world and schools since I was a kid, but the only time I remember my dad picking me up at school a kid on the playground called it to the attention of the teacher who was monitoring the playground thinking someone was kidnapping me!. Kid walked, rode their bikes or took the school bus in those days, seeing a parent there was not common.

I was thinking something similiar. And wondering why high schoolers are being picked up from school. We live in the country and all kids would walk (we are 1.5 miles away gasp!) or take the bus. This was not 50 years ago. It was two! Why so many pay taxes for school transportation and pick their kids up everyday baffles me.