With such overbearing parents who sheltered them for so long, you would think they would be aware of the children's activities on FB and take care of it. Strange.
And if you want to call what we do "sheltering," then I guess that's what we will continue to do - we haven't had any 15 or 16 year olds making any sexually explicit comments over the internet to our kids yet. I guess until then, we will just keep doing what we are doing.
My intentions were not to insult you, sorry if you took it that way. My only intentions were to say regardless of how much a parent thinks they know everything in their child's life, know all their child's friends, etc.; this (or something similar) CAN happen. I am also active in dd's school and at church, we live in a semi-small area and because of having the child care center and having worked at the school for a couple of years, I know almost all of the kids and their parents. (the two girls in question were in the same school, mom pulled them out to homeschool).
The girl in all this is someone who has been to my house, been along on family outings, dd has stayed with them (I was mistaken in thinking that because their parents had them on such short leaches, everything had to be ok). I have been somewhat friendly with both the mom and the dad having talked to them when either of us were dropping the kids off at each other's homes and when I picked their girls up for church. This was not some faceless stranger online. These were kids that I trusted and dd trusted and thought were her friends.
If dd didn't have a facebook page, its likely that the same things would have been said but it all would have been on the bff's page and I, possibly, would not have known about it. Or it could have been posted on any of the other kid's pages. Just like Amy&Dan said, it CAN happen and things can be said about your child or other kids that don't have a page
I thought the kids here were also pretty safe from bullying online. They are all "friends" online. The ones that are not friends IRL more or less ignore each other online and they all just post about what they are doing and where they are going and invite each other to the movies, lake, etc.
You would think that their parents would at least see what they are doing online wouldn't you? Their mother is obsessed in thinking that these girls are going to be abducted or attacked and so doesn't let them out of her sight except with me and a few trusted adults (or so she thinks), I guess she feels they are safe online. The problem is she is so controlling and overbearing that they spend most of their time trying to get around her and her rules.
In all of this, there is some things I am glad of. Dd now knows how to handle a situation like this. She realizes that she needs to be careful of her real life friends and pay attention to who she can really trust and who may just turn around and stab her in the back. And she has found who her real friends are.
The problem isn't gone and we may have more stuff coming along the pipe but we think we have mostly done away with the problem online. (between our blocks and her friend's blocks). Dh has talked to their father, but who knows if he will do anything or even believes us. Like we told dd, we have done everything we can as of now. And just as dh told their father, we will contact the police if anymore happens.
And any of you that are parents, if your OVER 13 year old is on facebook; please, please keep up with their page, make sure they are willing to tell you if anyone says nasty things to them, and know what they are saying to other people too. I saw how this affected these girls even though they told me right away and we were able to immediately take action; I can only imagine, with horror, how they would have felt if they had not told me and it had continued to happen.
