Relocating

[Frances999]

Thank you for all your advice everyone Lots of you seem to have been there and it sounds like a nice part of the country. It would be nice if we could check it out before we have to make the decision (by March) but I am not sure if that will be possible. We will have to wait and see.

your kids are at easy ages for something like this....

as is obvious from some of my posts, i have been dragged around the globe from the time i was in diapers (a great deal of my childhood and teen years spent in various places in the Far East.....as well as some in Europe)....

it was very easy when i was young, much more difficult when i was a teen......but i still liked it even then....but some teens really have a terrible time with it, but since your kids aren't that age, no need to consider teen problems..

in any case, your kids' ages are no problem....
well....not no problem at all, but any difficulties they have in school will be made up for by the experience of living and going to school in america....

of course, the 3 year old won't really remember.....the 6 year old will remember some of it.....and the 8 year old will most certainly be altered by the experience...most likely in a good way...

but all of this assumes that you can handle change....if you freak out, your kids will freak out...
my parents were always very adaptable....as am i (so my kids have survived relatively well as DH and I have moved around the globe)...

however, i've seen spouses who've had a terrible time adjusting to the change and as a result their kids don't do as well as they might otherwise.....

but from your posts, you seem to have your feet on the ground, so that shouldn't be a problem...

You say near SF, which could be many places....i don't know what your husband does, but if he's in high tech, one of the big high tech areas near SF is San Jose....a very nice place....extremely expensive, but since the company will provide housing you don't have to worry about that..
in fact, all of the SF area is extremely expensive.....one of the most expensive areas in all of the US....but if they're paying for your housing that's good..
you need to be careful about the area you pick to live in, but that's obvious..

you will probably also need a second car, but cars are cheaper than in the UK, so that shouldn't be too much of a problem either...

10 months isn't a very long time so you won't be away from family for too long...make sure that 10 months is written in a contract somewhere, or you might end up getting stuck there for longer....

also make sure that his compensation is high enough to pay for the very high cost of living in the SF area....it is really extraordinarily high....don't be fooled by how cheap things are in orlando...SF is a lot lot lot more expensive....

so i guess, given the above, i'm saying that you should go for it....

good luck in making your decision....and be sure your husband is very careful about what he negotiates with his company regarding the relocation.....

Thanks for such a comprehensive post, Beth - you raised some excellent questions I should try to get answers to. I think our children will find it easy to adapt, it is just their education I am a little worried about. We will need to check out the schooling options in the area and also make sure that they do not have too much catching up to do when we arrive back in England.

The area near San Francisco detailed on the paperwork is "Hillsborough". I am trying to find out some more information about it - his company are sending an information pack and photo's etc with details about the house/location which will be useful. By the sounds of it we don't have a choice about the specific location.

We will certainly need a second car, but that should not be too much of an issue. I am hoping we can negotiate some extra things like that with the company. Thanks for the advice about making sure the 10 months is written into the contract - that never even crossed my mind. I guess we will need to look into the living arrangements and costs in much more detail before deciding and we will need to find a family member to keep a look out on our house whilst we are away - we don't want to rent it or anything like that.

DH is from San Jose and I lived there for 10 years. We moved back when our eldest DD was 2. We have considered moving back several times and one of the reasons that we haven't is because of the education system in CA. As much as DMIL wants her DS and DGS living close by she suggested that we actually stay here until the girls are finished with their education as she feels that they will lose out if we move back. So I guess my biggest concern would be will the children have to start catching up when you move back in 10 months time. Having said that I just love the Bay Area and I would recommend it to anyone. There is so much to see and do and your children don't just learn in the classroom. As somebody already mentioned it is exremely expensive in San Francisco and the Bay Area in general, and childcare is astronomical, so you might want to consider that. All in all I would say go for it. I'm sure that you and your children will have an awesome experience!

Thanks, Catherine. The education is worrying me the most - our youngest DS would just be starting school at the planned time we would be going, I really need to find out more about the education choices in the area. We have little information about the actual area at the moment, just the preliminary details.

 

[Clare D]

Hi Frances
I would go for it. Friends of the family moved out to Nevda about 15 years ago and have lived there vere since. Their way of life is so different to here that I don't belive they will ever move back. Every year we received a breakdown month by month of what they had done that year and it was fantastic.
My cousin lives in Australia and recently he and his family came back to England for 2 months. His girls had a great time as it was an experience many children of their age never get to benefit from.
I know that you will miss your family and friends but on your return I'm sure you will never moan about the English weather again.
Also just think you won't be too far from Disneyland.

 

[disneyholic family]

The area near San Francisco detailed on the paperwork is "Hillsborough". I am trying to find out some more information about it - his company are sending an information pack and photo's etc with details about the house/location which will be useful. By the sounds of it we don't have a choice about the specific location.

We will certainly need a second car, but that should not be too much of an issue. I am hoping we can negotiate some extra things like that with the company. Thanks for the advice about making sure the 10 months is written into the contract - that never even crossed my mind. I guess we will need to look into the living arrangements and costs in much more detail before deciding and we will need to find a family member to keep a look out on our house whilst we are away - we don't want to rent it or anything like that.

Thanks, Catherine. The education is worrying me the most - our youngest DS would just be starting school at the planned time we would be going, I really need to find out more about the education choices in the area. We have little information about the actual area at the moment, just the preliminary details.

if it's the Hillsborough I'm familiar with, it's a relatively wealthy town....successful professionals and old money, etc.....

a friend who lives in the SF area says that Hillsborough has super good schools....especially the elementary schools (what your children would attend).......

i think it's south of SF.....

by the way, regarding schooling...from my experience, anything missed is very easily recovered with just a bit of extra effort....and the experience of living in a new and different place and all that goes with it, more than makes up for it.....

several people have mentioned Disneyland, which will indeed be closer than when you're in the UK, although not all that close (since you'll be in Northern CA and Disneyland is in southern CA)...
the natural wonders that will be just a short drive away are totally awesome.... you could have wonderful weekends....visiting the national parks (e.g. Yosemite, Redwood, etc.) ...or driving along the coast....or into the mountains....or a longer drive north into oregon/washington....the west coast is magnificent in terms of natural beauty.....really amazing....

 

[Mrs Dazzle]

Hi Frances, just catching up on the DIS news.

Wow, what a fabulous opportunity for you all.

If it was us - we'd all go. No hesitations.

Trying to put myself in your shoes, this is how I'd view it. My children would be young enough to adapt, the experience alone would be well worth it, especially for the children. The opportunities of a life as a family together outweigh the negatives (ie "uprooting" everyone). My DH travels a lot (but only in this country) so we're used to him being away a few nights a week, but overseas for 10 months is a completely different ballgame.

Childern of your ages should make friends very easily, so whilst they would leave some friends behind, they will make many new ones. You can always speak with your school and ask for their advice on what to do when you return (of course they won't be able to hold places for you, but if you chat with the Head, find out their policy on extended absences and returns).

My DB and his family moved back to the UK from Hong Kong after 11 years. Their children (who had only ever been to kindergareten and Year 1 over in Hong Kong) have adjusted fantastically to life over here (it's mum and dad who are struggling with the little quirks of life in England after 11 years ).

My cousin is just debating a similar opportunity - her husband is to work in Singapore for two years. He's been over there on his own for a few weeks now and they were going to leave it that he would be over there, Bev and the family here - but they all miss each other so much that his company have said they will pay for them all to move, school etc. Bev's father has just had problems with his heart, so at the back of her mind is them. They have told her catagorically to go - the children want to go (ages 6, 9 and 13) - it's a 13 hour flight home. Could take longer to organise something over here for that!

I'm sure you will all make the best decision for your family, but me - I'd go like a shot, a fabulous opportunity.

 

[Olaf]

What an opportunity! Go for it!!! That is one of the most beautiful parts of the country.

I wouldn't worry too much about schooling. Your children are young enough to catch anything they might miss from a British curriculum. House values in that area are some of the highest in the country, and the quality of the schools are generally tied to property values. I think you'll be very happy with them.

Here's a link to the Hillsborough City School District. You can see the statistics on the three elementary schools in that area. Middle school is for the 6, 7, & 8th grades.

http://www.hcsd.k12.ca.us/

I have a feeling your children will be very popular amongst their peers. About the ten months thing, I'm betting you won't want to go home so quickly.

 

[disneyholic family]

Here's a link to the Hillsborough City School District. You can see the statistics on the three elementary schools in that area. Middle school is for the 6, 7, & 8th grades.

http://www.hcsd.k12.ca.us/

I have a feeling your children will be very popular amongst their peers. About the ten months thing, I'm betting you won't want to go home so quickly.

interesting link....talk about a lack of imagination....the elementary schools are called North, South , and West....how amusingly drab...
anyway, they are known in the area to be top notch schools (stupid names aside)...
the calendar is interesting.....they have really short vacations...only 12 days for Christmas/New Year and only 6 days for spring break....really short breaks...interesting...

if you want to get an idea of how much better these schools are than the state wide average - go into one of the schools at the top of the screen, and then click on their accountability report card......the statewide statistics are shockingly low....but these 3 schools did really well....
you also can see the composition of the schools (they say that their students come from middle and upper class homes -- it also gives the ethnic breakdown)...

i think it's safe to say, you won't be able to find a better school district than this one and you should feel comfortable with it....it's about as good as it gets in the states...

 

[Olaf]

The short school breaks are countered by the way too long (IMHO) summer break of three months. It's a typical American school schedule, and I've always disliked it. The children spend the entire month of September reacquainting themselves with the material they learned in the spring and forgotten over the summer. A few school disticts around the country have gone to what's called year-round school, which is more like the British system, and I wish we lived in one.

I think the test scores are impressive, especially when compared to the rest of the state. When evaluating any test scores in California you have to take into account the huge immigrant population and it's a tremendous problem for state educators.

Here's another site with links on the town.

http://www.hsf.org/

Here's another one, interesting stats. Median house value is one million dollars.

http://www.city-data.com/city/Hillsborough-California.html

 

[Frances999]

Hi Frances, just catching up on the DIS news.

Wow, what a fabulous opportunity for you all.

If it was us - we'd all go. No hesitations.

Trying to put myself in your shoes, this is how I'd view it. My children would be young enough to adapt, the experience alone would be well worth it, especially for the children. The opportunities of a life as a family together outweigh the negatives (ie "uprooting" everyone). My DH travels a lot (but only in this country) so we're used to him being away a few nights a week, but overseas for 10 months is a completely different ballgame.

Childern of your ages should make friends very easily, so whilst they would leave some friends behind, they will make many new ones. You can always speak with your school and ask for their advice on what to do when you return (of course they won't be able to hold places for you, but if you chat with the Head, find out their policy on extended absences and returns).

My DB and his family moved back to the UK from Hong Kong after 11 years. Their children (who had only ever been to kindergareten and Year 1 over in Hong Kong) have adjusted fantastically to life over here (it's mum and dad who are struggling with the little quirks of life in England after 11 years ).

My cousin is just debating a similar opportunity - her husband is to work in Singapore for two years. He's been over there on his own for a few weeks now and they were going to leave it that he would be over there, Bev and the family here - but they all miss each other so much that his company have said they will pay for them all to move, school etc. Bev's father has just had problems with his heart, so at the back of her mind is them. They have told her catagorically to go - the children want to go (ages 6, 9 and 13) - it's a 13 hour flight home. Could take longer to organise something over here for that!

I'm sure you will all make the best decision for your family, but me - I'd go like a shot, a fabulous opportunity.

Hi Annie I haven't "seen" you around for a while - I hope you are okay

Thanks for the advice. We are also used to DH being away for a few days, but like you say, 10 months would be totally different. I spoke to the headmistress of our eldest DD/DS's school today about the situation. She said she thought it would be a wonderful experience for them and that they would be very welcome back again when we return home. The children are really excited about the opportunity - I didn't want to tell them too early but wanted to see their reaction to the idea, so told them today. The headmistress said she will stay in contact by e-mail and phone and let me have some workbooks etc for them to try and complete.

It sounds like your cousin is in a difficult situation as well. I guess 2 years is an especially long time if you dislike the location and are worried about relatives at home. This is why I am so adamant we go and check out the area and schools before committing. From all the comments I have had, it sounds like a wonderful area - but I would still like to see for myself

I really appreciate the advice and it is certainly helping me realise what a great opportunity this will be. Please let me know what Bev decides, or has she decided already?

Thanks

What an opportunity! Go for it!!! That is one of the most beautiful parts of the country.

I wouldn't worry too much about schooling. Your children are young enough to catch anything they might miss from a British curriculum. House values in that area are some of the highest in the country, and the quality of the schools are generally tied to property values. I think you'll be very happy with them.

Here's a link to the Hillsborough City School District. You can see the statistics on the three elementary schools in that area. Middle school is for the 6, 7, & 8th grades.

http://www.hcsd.k12.ca.us/

I have a feeling your children will be very popular amongst their peers. About the ten months thing, I'm betting you won't want to go home so quickly.

Thanks for the link, Steph. It seems as though the schooling is very good in this area - I am hoping we can go and visit some before making a decision. Like you say, at the ages of our children I doubt it will be too much of a problem for them to catch up when we return. I hope the experiences will certainly make-up for any slight falling behind they may encounter.

10 months is an awkward time - long enough to get settled, but not long enough to get settled "properly"! I guess that will be the best way to find out if the relocation was worth it - whether or not we want to come home at the end of the 10 months

interesting link....talk about a lack of imagination....the elementary schools are called North, South , and West....how amusingly drab...
anyway, they are known in the area to be top notch schools (stupid names aside)...
the calendar is interesting.....they have really short vacations...only 12 days for Christmas/New Year and only 6 days for spring break....really short breaks...interesting...

if you want to get an idea of how much better these schools are than the state wide average - go into one of the schools at the top of the screen, and then click on their accountability report card......the statewide statistics are shockingly low....but these 3 schools did really well....
you also can see the composition of the schools (they say that their students come from middle and upper class homes -- it also gives the ethnic breakdown)...

i think it's safe to say, you won't be able to find a better school district than this one and you should feel comfortable with it....it's about as good as it gets in the states...

Thanks for the further advice, Beth. The holidays are certainly shorter than we are used to over here. We will be there from January to the beginning of November in 2007, so the Christmas break won't affect us. I am actually happy to hear there is a 3-month summer holiday; it will be a great time to explore some of the area together, and the children can do some catching up work as well, which I am sure they will love

The short school breaks are countered by the way too long (IMHO) summer break of three months. It's a typical American school schedule, and I've always disliked it. The children spend the entire month of September reacquainting themselves with the material they learned in the spring and forgotten over the summer. A few school disticts around the country have gone to what's called year-round school, which is more like the British system, and I wish we lived in one.

I think the test scores are impressive, especially when compared to the rest of the state. When evaluating any test scores in California you have to take into account the huge immigrant population and it's a tremendous problem for state educators.

Here's another site with links on the town.

http://www.hsf.org/

Here's another one, interesting stats. Median house value is one million dollars.

http://www.city-data.com/city/Hills...California.html

Thanks again for the links, Steph. I am trying to find out more about the house we will be allocated.......I don't believe we will have much of a choice over the matter, but it would be nice if it was worth $1m! What are the typical school times in the USA? Are there any exams which may affect children aged 5-10 (for example, there are SAT exams here in England)?

I am certainly warming to the idea (as you can see, compared to my original post!). It will be lots of research and planning, but I hope it will all plan-out okay in the long run

 

[Olaf]

I don't believe we will have much of a choice over the matter, but it would be nice if it was worth $1m! What are the typical school times in the USA? Are there any exams which may affect children aged 5-10 (for example, there are SAT exams here in England)?

The thing about that area is that a million dollar home is just your average upper middle class home. The values in that area have gotten insane.

Most elementary schools average about 6.5 hours per day. Start times can vary widely and are dependent on the buses. Most counties use the same buses to get the high school, middle school and elementary school students to school. They end up staggering them to accomplish this feat. The hours at DS's elementary school are 9:10-3:40, but they were 8:00-3:00 in Texas with longer recess breaks.

The only "exams" your elementary school children will take are standardized tests to grade the school's progress, and perhaps something at the beginning to see where they're at academically. Unless your child is evaluated for a gifted program, which is done differently everywhere. It really just depends on the county, it can vary widely.

You could supplement their education with some British history, and British spelling, but I seriously doubt you're going to encounter many problems. I'm betting there's a private international school in the area, if you're really concerned about it. I know that there's a British school in Washington DC, which is run on the British system of testing and meeting requirements for British universities. But, if I moved to the UK with elementary school children, I'd want them in the local school just to make friends. Bet they go home with American accents--might not be a good thing.

 

[Frances999]

The thing about that area is that a million dollar home is just your average upper middle class home. The values in that area have gotten insane.

Most elementary schools average about 6.5 hours per day. Start times can vary widely and are dependent on the buses. Most counties use the same buses to get the high school, middle school and elementary school students to school. They end up staggering them to accomplish this feat. The hours at DS's elementary school are 9:10-3:40, but they were 8:00-3:00 in Texas with longer recess breaks.

The only "exams" your elementary school children will take are standardized tests to grade the school's progress, and perhaps something at the beginning to see where they're at academically. Unless your child is evaluated for a gifted program, which is done differently everywhere. It really just depends on the county, it can vary widely.

You could supplement their education with some British history, and British spelling, but I seriously doubt you're going to encounter many problems. I'm betting there's a private international school in the area, if you're really concerned about it. I know that there's a British school in Washington DC, which is run on the British system of testing and meeting requirements for British universities. But, if I moved to the UK with elementary school children, I'd want them in the local school just to make friends. Bet they go home with American accents--might not be a good thing.

Thanks Stephanie. The school hours are similar to over here, then. I don't really like the idea of an international school - I guess a big part of the experience should be for them to mix and make friends with local people in the area rather than other international children. It's a good idea about supplementing with spellings/history - I am hoping to get a copy of the general curriculum and topics they will be missing whilst we are away; so I can try and keep them as up to speed as possible. Not sure about the accents though - that might take some work!

 

[disneyholic family]

Bet they go home with American accents--might not be a good thing.

i seriously doubt this.....not in 10 months....it's possible they'll be able to speak with one if they want to.....and it's possible they may want to while they're with their american friends, but when they're home with you, they'll speak with the home accent...unless they want to annoy you, in which case they'll switch to american...

where we live now we have people from all over....and all the kids speak with whatever accent is spoken at home, regardless of number of years here......although for some reason the british kids seem to get more grins from annoying their parents as often as possible by switching to an american accent....but they're doing it on purpose...they don't actually speak that way.....

too bad you're not going to a non-English speaking country....your kids are at the perfect age to learn a foreign language....and a child that age can learn it in 10 months easily (even less)....and once you've learned a second language, the third, fourth, etc. are simple to learn....it's as if your brain gets switched on to language and it all just flows in....

 

[Olaf]

The statement on an American accent was made "tongue in cheek". I know the Brits just love the way we talk, they're always asking me to speak just to hear my accent.

Good luck on your move Frances. I feel certain it will be a wonderful experience for your entire family.

 

[Frances999]

too bad you're not going to a non-English speaking country....your kids are at the perfect age to learn a foreign language....and a child that age can learn it in 10 months easily (even less)....and once you've learned a second language, the third, fourth, etc. are simple to learn....it's as if your brain gets switched on to language and it all just flows in....

That's a good point, Beth. Eldest DS is currently learning French at school (during lunchtimes) and is picking it up very quickly. We would all learn to speak another language most effectively by actually living in the country for a while.

Good luck on your move Frances. I feel certain it will be a wonderful experience for your entire family.

Thanks Stephanie I know who to contact if I need any more advice!