Regarding Stealing... Am I Crazy?

[AKL_Megs]

I have a friend who works at a country club. She does some sort of planning and customer service/bartending regarding banquets, etc. Anyways, I got in a really HEATED debate with her yesterday and I am really just in shock at her views on what constitutes stealing. Someone PLEASE tell me I am not totally "old fashioned" here...

So my friend doesn't hate her job, but she has a bad taste in her mouth when it comes to some of her employers practices. Fine, whatever... don't we all sometimes! But my friend told me that from time to time, she "gets back at the man". At her country club, there are standard members and select memebers, and the select members, at special events, get free drinks. Since this is the case and almost all members are select members, they are on the honor system and don't ring up any drink orders, but rather, just submit their cash money at the end of the evening.

Last night, my "friend" proceeded to tell me that, when her employer gives her a hard time, she pockets a bit of the cash money because, "it is all the same anyways." Her way of "getting back at them".

Okay, not only is this TOTALLY stealing, but IMO, she's not stealing from her EMPLOYER, but rather, the poor people who have just PAID for their drinks!

Am I just totally crazy here?

 

[GoodFairies]

In this case she is stealing from the employer, not the customer. The customer gave money and got what they were paying for.

 

[NY Disney fan]

Two wrongs don't make a right. She is stealing...and participating in exactly what her boss does. (if she feels HE is stealing)

 

[luvmy3]

You're not crazy but your friend sure is.

 

[AKL_Megs]

In this case she is stealing from the employer, not the customer. The customer gave money and got what they were paying for.

I guess you are right... but if I found out a employee was pocketing my money, I would be mad! But I guess if the boss is pocketing the money...

Just upset about my friend. Really disappointing.

 

[Pakey]

She is stealing from the country club members. They pay their monthly dues that run the country club; dues are set to cover the costs of operating the club. Your friend could be prosecuted if caught. If she doesn't like it there, find another job, but don't steal from the members.

 

[Scurvy]

She is taking something that does not belong to her. She can rationalize it or justify it any way she wants, but it it doesn't matter. She's stealing, and she ought to be fired for it.

 

[dawson5]

She is stealing from the country club members. They pay their monthly dues that run the country club; dues are set to cover the costs of operating the club. Your friend could be prosecuted if caught. If she doesn't like it there, find another job, but don't steal from the members.

and imagine the fun she'll have finding a job with theft on her record if her job chooses to prosecute. Some people don't realize the implications of their actions and how it will affect them beyond the moment.

 

[C.Ann]

No - you're not.. It's stealing..

 

[Becky2005]

You are not crazy....wouldn't that just be the lower level of embezzelment?

I'm pretty sure that would be grounds for immediate termination if caught. It would be just like helping yourself to a few $20's out of the cash register and into your pocket.

Since I didn't specifically say it, yes it is stealing. I'm pretty sure the country club didn't say "oh just help yourself to whatever you want in the till".

 

[AKL_Megs]

No - you're not.. It's stealing..

Thanks!

Now the hard part... what do I do with this new found information! I feel bad for my friend, but she needs to get a clue and grow up. I see her so differently now... maybe because I work my butt off for my money.

 

[dislaney]

Uh..she is stealing. She can call it whatever she wants but it is stealing.

 

[Allison]

She's a thief.

 

[C.Ann]

Thanks!

Now the hard part... what do I do with this new found information! I feel bad for my friend, but she needs to get a clue and grow up. I see her so differently now... maybe because I work my butt off for my money.

If she thinks it's fine - and even funny - I don't think there's anything that you can "do" about it.. She's not going to listen to anything you say and short of that, all you could do is report it to her boss.. I'm not sure if that's something you're comfortable with doing though.. It's hard when you learn that some people aren't who you thought they were - but now you know and you have to decide what you're the most comfortable doing about it..

Good luck!

 

[Piecey]

Stealing.

Heck, I worked at Burger King in high school and if we even ate a pickle it was stealing.

 

[disykat]

I expected you to be talking about a few paper clips or something. What she is doing is not only stealing, but stealing big time! I agree with becky2005 -she's taking undocumented funds out of the cash register - definitely embezzlement..

 

[luvsmickeymouse]

That is stealing.

 

[GoodFairies]

Thanks!

Now the hard part... what do I do with this new found information! I feel bad for my friend, but she needs to get a clue and grow up. I see her so differently now... maybe because I work my butt off for my money.

You do nothing, except maybe decide how valuable this friendship is to you and whether you want to continue it. The job part is none of your business.

 

[MarkBarbieri]

Hopefully, she quits stealing. If not, it would be best if she were caught and appropriately punished. I hope that she's aware that her life can be practically ruined by an embezzlement conviction. Good luck finding a decent job with that on your record.

 

[DWGal210]

You're not wrong; your friend IS stealing.

As others have said, I don't think there is anything you can do. She clearly feels that she is not doing anything wrong.

I know what you mean though - sometimes you find out something about a friend and it damages your relationship with them. Been there, done that.