RANT: I don't care if you want to sit next to your kids on the airplane

[sk!mom]

By the way, we are road tripping so I just caught my DH up on this thread and asked for his opinion.

His initial comment, "no one has ever asked me to change seats." Our discussion led to our conclusion that he is very unapproachable and would be among the last to be asked. He's a nervous flyer and has to take pretty heavy meds due to potentially debilitating motion sickness. He does what is necessary to make an aisle or window as likely as possible. He almost always has a window. He immediately sits down in the window seat, puts on his seatbelt, puts in his ear buds, leans into his travel pillow in the window well and closes his eyes. They will remain closed until landing unless it's longer than maybe 6 hours in which case he'll make a quick restroom trip and the resume his position. He did say that if a mom was brave enough to ask, he would actually probably move. Which I believe. He has lots of grace and compassion which is pretty easy to have when you're a pretty intimidating looking man who people don't really consider taking advantage of very often. He's a lifelong body builder/ power lifter. Think physically imposing teddy bear.

This could lead to a whole different winding road on this thread, do men get asked as much as women especially those of us in the "mom" zone. Maybe my "girl power" mentality comes into play with my opinions.

As a further side note- he reports that with his careful planning, he actually only recalls ever sitting in a middle seat once as an adult. He's mid 50's so that's a lot of flights that planning guaranteed a desirable seat.

 

[kaytieeldr]

The kids flying as unaccompanied minors are not watched every single minute. It is not at all the same as flying with a parent or guardian.

Yup. I spent much more time engaging with "my" unaccompanied minor than the SW Flight Attendants ever did. I bet it they didn't have 160+ other passengers...

 

[kaytieeldr]

I guess I just don’t assume the worst in people until I see it. The OP did mention there was a major storm or something, that mom and her kid could have been with their whole family, got cancelled, slept in the airport, and had to take separate flights just to get home. Or their last flight was overbooked and they got bumped. That kiddo could have a major medical/mental health issue that Mom doesn’t want to tell the whole world about but needs to be there to tend to.

Or none of the above. She could have erroneously assumed someone would give up their seat to her.

The next rant thread on here will be about an annoying seat-mate that kept getting up repeatedly throughout the flight and disturbing everybody else in the row.

I swear, I had an annoying separate who kept getting up repeatedly throughout the flight and disturbing me!

Seat 1F on a JetBlue redeye. Father and son next to me. Dad asked if I would switch with his wife, in 1D. No problem, right?

Wrong. Middle seat passenger got up every. fifteen. minutes. to exercise in place. Which is why I now will not switch seats on a flight.

 

[Wubar]

Or none of the above. She could have erroneously assumed someone would give up their seat to her.


I swear, I had an annoying separate who kept getting up repeatedly throughout the flight and disturbing me!

Seat 1F on a JetBlue redeye. Father and son next to me. Dad asked if I would switch with his wife, in 1D. No problem, right?

Wrong. Middle seat passenger got up every. fifteen. minutes. to exercise in place. Which is why I now will not switch seats on a flight.

Uh oh. Now you might get flamed over your complaint about the constant exerciser. That person might have been a nervous flier and exercising soothed their soul, was paranoid about deep vein thrombosis and wanted to stay active, was en route to a wrestling tournament and needed to lose 2 more ounces to make weight, or was going for the Guinness world record for jumping jacks.

 

[mom2rtk]

Uh oh. Now you might get flamed over your complaint about the constant exerciser. That person might have been a nervous flier and exercising soothed their soul, was paranoid about deep vein thrombosis and wanted to stay active, was en route to a wrestling tournament and needed to lose 2 more ounces to make weight, or was going for the Guinness world record for jumping jacks.

Or maybe all of those things?

 

[Skellingtonj]

Or none of the above. She could have erroneously assumed someone would give up their seat to her.


I swear, I had an annoying separate who kept getting up repeatedly throughout the flight and disturbing me!

Seat 1F on a JetBlue redeye. Father and son next to me. Dad asked if I would switch with his wife, in 1D. No problem, right?

Wrong. Middle seat passenger got up every. fifteen. minutes. to exercise in place. Which is why I now will not switch seats on a flight.

Curious as to how long the flight was?? Annoying either way thou

 

[ronandannette]

Curious as to how long the flight was?? Annoying either way thou

Commercial flights in coach are just another way of saying "annoying". The experience is generally just barely tolerable and if it's not one thing it's another; all either directly or indirectly a result of airline policies and a complete disregard for passengers. And with profits like these: https://thepointsguy.com/2017/10/us-airlines-over-5-billion-profits-q32017/ it simply can't just be about making more money. At this point it almost feels personal.

 

[a1tinkfans]

Recent flight was Delayed because 2 female Adults decided they wanted to sit no ext to one another, despite having assigned seating ( jet blue) so they sat where they wanted!
It was insane as the flight attendant kept repeating that they must sit where they were assigned and the pilot announced several times to take seats so they could push back from the gate.
It was so ridiculous, frustrating and caused a delay of over 10 minutes ( though made that time up in flight)
People were being moved about, carryon luggage shifted etc because two Alleged grown ups selfishly bullied there way into sitting together.
What an example... not

 

[kaytieeldr]

or was going for the Guinness world record for jumping jacks.

OMG, was that you??? I swear, she was doing modified jumping jacks!

 

[kaytieeldr]

Curious as to how long the flight was?? Annoying either way thou

Five actual hours, but West to East so it felt like a lifetime

 

[kaytieeldr]

People were being moved about, carryon luggage shifted etc because two Alleged grown ups selfishly bullied there way into sitting together.

Ridiculous. They should have been removed from the plane and put on the next flight with two seats together.

But we all know how that would go

 

[ronandannette]

Recent flight was Delayed because 2 female Adults decided they wanted to sit no ext to one another, despite having assigned seating ( jet blue) so they sat where they wanted!
It was insane as the flight attendant kept repeating that they must sit where they were assigned and the pilot announced several times to take seats so they could push back from the gate.
It was so ridiculous, frustrating and caused a delay of over 10 minutes ( though made that time up in flight)
People were being moved about, carryon luggage shifted etc because two Alleged grown ups selfishly bullied there way into sitting together.
What an example... not

How did that incident even go? When the FA checked their boarding passes (presumably at the request of the passengers whose seats they'd taken) did they just refuse? At what point did they actually move, or at what point did the FA's just give up and leave them refusing to comply with directions? I thought that was some kind of crime?

 

[chelynnah]

I agree with you. My child is grown, but I'm still a mother. In an emergency situation, I would always take care of a child & put them first. I'm sure there are non-parents out there who would do the same, but I can only speak from a parent's point of view.

I’m a non-parent, but like you I would absolutely take care of the child first, but I wouldn’t expect the parent to know or trust that.

However on the topic if I paid for my seats (which I choose carefully because of pain issue) I’m not going to give them up to put myself in a more uncomfortable position. If it’s relatively equal then I’d possibly consider it. OTOH offer DH a couple of nice whiskeys and he probably would

 

[Skellingtonj]

Five actual hours, but West to East so it felt like a lifetime

Oh lord no. That’s nuts

 

[FairestOfThemAll37]

I guess we just have a different perspective. I will still choose to give grace and compassion to others and give them the benefit of the doubt. Especially another mother in what could be a very stressful situation.

Your comment should cut both ways, but seems to only take into account compassion for a parent. I’ve been shamed for not giving up my seat by a mom who was trying to sit with her kids. I pay for as much extra room as I can. Sometimes that’s first class, sometimes economy plus and sometimes just a window or aisle seat. I get very anxious when I don’t have my minimum viable space bubble as I call it.

I was traveling by myself and there was a middle seat open next to me so the woman wanted me and the other person to take their middle seats so they could sit together. I declined. Yes, I paid for my seat, but it wasn’t because I couldn’t see beyond what I paid, it was because we were all going to be miserable when the plane had to land over the Midwest because a crazy woman was screaming and trying to escape the plane. It didn’t stop the mother from screaming to the whole plane that it was my fault we couldn’t take off.

I need a certain amount of personal space. Sitting in a middle seat is not an option for me. I research flights on SW to make sure I get one that starts in my airport, I buy my seats or business select A1-15 on SW, and I’m prepared to get a hotel room or delay to make sure I don’t leave it up to others. I have been in situations where things have gone wrong and had to decide if I could get through or needed to delay.

Sometimes things absolutely happen outside of our plans or control and it never hurts to ask (I’ll trade a like for like seat or even swap window or aisle most of the time in the same section), but everybody needs to be active in problem solving their family needs.

I think most people are reasonable humans. I think most can understand extreme circumstances, but everybody has their own reasons, not just those with kids.

I think too, there are a lot of people who don’t read or plan. They want to fly cheap and then plan to make people switch seats by threatening a motion sick or hyperactive child on somebody. If you read enough travel boards, this comes up. Most people have a good sense for when somebody is being entitled.

 

[Cubbiecakes]

Your comment should cut both ways, but seems to only take into account compassion for a parent.

Yes, because only with people with children have difficult lives! The unworthy, sad, and lonely childless people should grovel and kowtow to their needs at all times, because being a parent is soooooo hard!

 

[LSUmiss]

Yes, because only with people with children have difficult lives! The unworthy, sad, and lonely childless people should grovel and kowtow to their needs at all times, because being a parent is soooooo hard!

Actually being a parent is hard. It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done. And most parents say the same thing. However, I chose to be one & would never expect anyone to “kowtow” to my needs. I would also never ask someone to switch seats unless there was some unforeseen reason that I ended up separated & then I would not ask for the better seat. But, I am one that will pay & plan extra so it doesn’t happen. BUT, parenting IS hard.

 

[Cubbiecakes]

*sigh* You missed the joke entirely.

 

[pweyl36]

You guys. For real. Read my original post. I said NOTHING about the person not giving up their seat. I said ZERO about them being a jerk or anything else. I was speaking to the internet shaming of the poor mom who is not here to tell her side and who we have like ZERO information about other than she was trying to sit with her child. That is sad. That the OP could not have thought outside of I paid for this seat and she is trying to steal it from me, is ugly. I'm sorry if you don't agree, or whatever. I said NOTHING about the OP should have given up their seat but I would not. And no, I - a parent traveling with a 2 year old - COULD NOT give up my seat but that doesn't mean I wouldn't try to help her in whatever way I could. And I CERTAINLY would not be on the internet shaming her over asking. No matter how frazzled she was.

Geez.

The Op never gave a name so she was just venting. Iam mad because this is becoming an Entitlement world. Would you have give your first class seat if you bought one?

 

[Ben E N]

Am I missing something big here, or isn't there a law that ensures that small children fly next to older family members, called the Families Flying Together Act? Whenever I mention it at the ticket counter, each of our children is seated by an adult. We may not all be together, but the airline works to make sure our children are taken care of, so we don't have to ask fellow passengers to help.