Rant about school - please tell me I'm right!

[Lizzy Lemon]

Had a letter today from Glen's English teacher about lack of effort in homework/coursework. He says she picks on him (old school teacher, taught his father 30 odd years ago!) and he hates her! We had this problem last year with science teacher but his grades have improved since he's had a new one this year, he wants to change class and if it improves his work I want him to move class. I've written a letter back to her to ask if this is possible, and now I'm nervous about sending it! It didn't help that she brought up his absence from school due to our holidays, that made my hackles rise, how dare she comment about a much needed break and it was only 4 days, some of his class are going skiing in December but they are absent with schools blessing - oohh I'm upset!

 

[kkymmy]

I think its worth talking more to your son and finding out a bit more about how this teacher singles him out. If it's a case of over-encouragement without improvement then he may feel that he's being pushed and in rebellion is maybe not trying as hard as he might, alternatively, it maybe that she is being extra-harsh on him believing that he can do better but not stressing her attention in the right way. Or as you believe it may be a targeted thing. But communication is the key to solving problems like this, however misunderstandings can make them worse. I'm not sure exactly what your letter says but maybe include some words that say something about targeted attention and you aren't sure why and would like to know more, maybe do this before taking action such as moving classes.

Just my two cents but I think there needs to be a further establishment of what is really happening before you decide to go ahead with action that could prove disruptive

 

[jen_uk]

From a teachers point of view I know how easy it is for students to blame the teacher when they themselves are in trouble! Some of the students in my tutor swear blind that their teacher hates them etc but when I look into it further it turns out that they are way behind in their work and have not been working in class!

 

[carolfoy]

oh Wendy I do feel your pain, to be honest if it was me I'd word the letter really carefully being sure not to point fingers that this teacher is picking on him and just explain that you feel he would benefit from a different teaching style. I think you have every right to ask him to change classes if you feel there are personal differences there.

 

[wilma-bride]

Without knowing her side of the story, I can't comment on whether your son is right or she is. Unfortunately, sometimes, personality clashes can happen between student/teacher just as they can between peers/colleagues etc. Does your son maintain that he is making an effort with his home/course work? If so, I would think that a move of class might help. Is it something you could discuss with her in person? I know I probably couldn't as I'm not good at speaking directly to people when I have a problem without either getting upset or angry. The fact that you're nervous about sending the letter suggests that speaking in person may not be an option. I would suggest you word the letter to say that your son feels he is making an effort and that you believe that it may help him to be moved to another class. I would also stress that you are happy to discuss it if she feels the need - that way, you are not making it sound like you blame her fully and you are also giving her a chance to explain properly what she thinks the problem might be.

 

[mandymouse]

All I can say Wendy, is go with your instinct. If this woman is difficult, then just miss her out and go straight to the Year Head. My youngest was having a terrible time at school toward the end of the last school year, and although she didn't want me to get involved at first - I spoke to the Year Head and had her moved from her form. Now she is a totally different kid, and she is happy at school, and I'm so glad that I did get involved

So, if I was you, I would send your letter, as this is a very important time in his school life - and if it eventually makes him happy, then that's all that matters

Sorry if I started to babble on - and Good Luck

 

[natalielongstaff]

you have allready had some good advice so i will just wish you luck with whatever you decide

 

[Lizzy Lemon]

She has been commenting on his lack of effort for a long time but so have we. He does as little as possible, the bare minimum. She claims this week she caught him doing homework (in his own time) that he should have been done two weeks ago (it was done at home, I saw him do it), he claims he was adjusting it. It was a speech to be given later that day, she said he wouldn't be prepared properly, he found out during the lesson she expected it to be given from memory. One girl went before him, then him (he got a slating for not knowing it) two more who also didn't know they had to learn it but they didn't get told off. I've pointed out in my letter if school had been a bit more strict in the past about quality of homework (or lack of) we wouldn't be in this position now. The reason we have got this letter is he stood up for himself when she commented about his absence and answered her back, I'm not pleased at his lack of respect but I'm pleased he's able to stand up for himself - I feel so confused!

 

[CustardTart]

Tough one, Wendy. Personally, I'm always inclined to give my kids the benefit of the doubt - as far as I'm concerned, their schools are lucky to have them! Negativity breeds negativity, so if Glen feels he'd benefit from a different teacher, I'd do as Mandy suggests...

Good luck...

 

[GrumpyUK]

Book an appointment and go and see her (in the first instance, maybe a letter if that doesn't work).

You say that your lad has been doing the bare minimum, well at least she thinks he's good enough to have a go at to get better! Teachers won't bother with someone if they don't think it's worth their effort.

Make an agreement with him that he applies himself to his work (as boring as it sounds to a teenager English is one of the most important subjects - get it right and the world is your oyster, get it wrong and you will always struggle) Start a homework diary with him (so if she wants something learnt by heart that is clear and not a surprise in the lesson). If she is still having a go at him and you've tried everything to support him in his work and the teacher in her standards, well, then ask for him to be moved.

It's, what, 2 weeks until the end of term. Have a trial run.

I think a letter (at this point) might aggravate the situation (though I would suggest you make notes about your concerns so you don't forget anything when you're there and write down what happened when you come out).

I do sympathise with him. I had 2 teachers at school who were awful to me. One clearly disliked me and taught me maths for 3 years (and computer studies for 2). It was a battle from one lesson to the next. I annoyed her I know. She was a disgrace to the teaching profession. The other teacher was strict and critical of me and we clashed hugely for over a year. BUT (and that's a big BUT) I learnt more from him than I have learnt from any other person ever and he formulated the person I have become today. I learnt a huge amount from him and he is the reason why I (a secondary modern boy from a rough school in a rough area) got my A levels and degrees.

Good luck!