Random Thread & The Interchangeable Inside Joke

[AmandaSparks730]

I have often dreamed
Of a far off place
Where a great warm welcome
Will be waiting for me
Where the crouds will cheer
When they see my face
And a voice keeps saying
This is where I'm meant to be

I will find my way
I can go the distance
I'll be there someday
If I can be strong
I know every mile
Will be worth my while
I would go most anywhere
To feel like I belong

I am on my way
I can go the distance
I don't care how far
Somehow I'll be strong
I know every mile
Will worth my while
I would go most anywhere
To find where I belong

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Young Herc was mortal now
But since he did not drink the last drop
He still retained his godlike strength
So thank his lucky star

But Zeus and Hera wept
Because their son could never come home
They'd have to watch their precious baby
Grow up from afar

Though Hades horrid plan
Was hatched before Herc cut his first tooth
The boy grew stronger ev'ry day and
That's the gospel truth

 

[AmandaSparks730]

MUSE 3:
If there's one God you don't want to get steamed up
It's Hades, cause he had an evil plan
He ran the Underworld
But thought the dead were dull and uncouth
He was as mean as he was ruthless
And that's the gospel truth
He had a plan to shake things up
And that's the gospel truth

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Back when the world was new
The planet Earth was down on its luck
And everywhere gigantic brutes
called Titans ran amok

It was a nasty place
There was a mess
whereever you stepped
Where chaos reigned and
earthquakes and volcanoes never slept

And then along came Zeus
He hurled his thunderbolt
He zapped
Locked those suckers in a vault
They're trapped
And on his own stopped
chaos in its tracks
And that's the gospel truth
The guy was too type A to just relax

And that's the world's first dish
Zeus tamed the globe
while still in his youth
Though, honey, it may seem imposs'ble
That's the gospel truth

On Mt. Olympus life was neat and
Smooth as sweet vermouth
Though, honey, it may seem imposs'ble
That's the gospel truth

 

[AmandaSparks730]

[Narrator:]
Long ago, in the far away land of ancient Greece
there was a golden age of powerful gods extraordinary heroes
and greatest and strongest of all these Heroes was the mighty
Hercules.
But what is the measure of a true hero? Now, that is what our
story ...

[Muses:]
Will you listen to him?
He's making the story sound like some Greek tragedy.
Lighten up, dude.
We'll take it from here, darling.

[Narrator:]
You go, girls ...

[Muses:] We are the muses.
Goddesses of the arts
and proclaimers of heroes.
Heroes like Hercules.
Honey, you mean Hunkules!
I'd like to make some sweet music of it
Our story actually begins long before Hercules
Many Aeons ago ...

 

[AmandaSparks730]

John Smith: We've improved the lives of savages all over the world.
Pocahontas: *Savages*?
John Smith: Uh, not that *you're* a savage.
Pocahontas: Just my people!
John Smith: No. Listen. That's not what I meant. Let me explain, uh...
Pocahontas: Let go!
John Smith: No, I'm not letting you leave.
Pocahontas: [jumps up into a tree]
John Smith: Look, don't do this. Savage is just a word, uh, you know. A term for people who are uncivilized.
Pocahontas: Like me.
John Smith: Well, when I say uncivilized, what I mean is, is...
Pocahontas: What you mean is, "not like you."

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Pocahontas: No! If you kill him, you'll have to kill me too.
Powhatan: Daughter, stand back.
Pocahontas: I won't! I love him, Father. Look around you. This is where the path of hatred has brought us. This is the path I choose, Father. What will yours be?

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Governor Ratcliffe: Wiggins, why do you think those insolent heathens attacked us?
Wiggins: Because we invaded their land and cut down their trees and dug up their earth?
Governor Ratcliffe: It's the gold! They have it and they don't want us to take it from them. Well, I'll just have to take it by force then, won't I?

 

[AmandaSparks730]

John Smith: Come with me?
Powhatan: You must choose your own path.
Pocahontas: [pause] I'm needed here.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Grandmother Willow: What do you see?
Pocahontas: Clouds... strange clouds.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Wiggins: Do you think we'll meet some savages?
Governor Ratcliffe: If we do, we shall be sure to give them a proper English greeting.
Wiggins: [holds up baskets of wine and cheese] Ooh, gift baskets!
Governor Ratcliffe: Oh, no. And he came so highly recommended.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Governor Ratcliffe: [taken away in chains, muffled] How dare you! Untie me at once! I'll have your heads for this!
Wiggins: [tearfully] And he came so highly recommended.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Wiggins: [gives Percy a bath] Hurry now, Percy. We must be all squeaky clean for the New World.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

John Smith: It's just a handshake. Here let me show you.
John Smith: [holds out hand]
Pocahontas: Nothing's happening.
John Smith: Uh, no, no. I need your hand first.
[they shake hands]
John Smith: It's how we say "hello".

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Powhatan: My daughter speaks with the wisdom beyond her years. We've all come here with anger in our hearts, but she comes with courage and understanding. From this day forward, if there is to be more killing, it will not start with me.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

John Smith: Pocahontas, that tree is talking to me.
Pocahontas: Then you should talk back.
Grandmother Willow: Don't be frightened, young man. My bark is worse than my bite.
Pocahontas: Say something.
John Smith: What do you say to a tree?
Pocahontas: Anything you want.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Pocahontas: [singing] You can own the earth and still / All you'll own is earth until / You can paint with all the colours of the wind.

 

[AmandaSparks730]

John Smith: Look, we don't have to fight them.
Thomas: John, what's gotten into you?
John Smith: I met one of them.
Ben: You what?
Thomas: A savage?
John Smith: They're not savages. They can help us. They know the land. They know how to navigate the rivers.
[Meeko pulls out an ear of corn and gives it to John]
John Smith: And look, it's food.
Lon: What is it?
John Smith: It's better than hardtack and gruel, that's for sure.
Wiggins: I like gruel.
Governor Ratcliffe: [takes the corn and throws it on the ground] They don't want to feed us, you ninnies! They want to kill us! All of us! They've got our gold, and they'll do anything to keep it!
John Smith: But there is no gold!
Ben: 'No gold'?
Governor Ratcliffe: [sarcastically] And I suppose your little Indian friend told you this.
John Smith: Yes.

 

[nerdylightbulb]

Awwww <3 He's so cute!

 

[AmandaSparks730]

Pocahontas: We don't have to fight them! There must be a better way.
Powhatan: Sometimes our paths are chosen for us.
Pocahontas: But maybe we should try talking to them.
Powhatan: They do not want to talk.
Pocahontas: But if one of them did want to talk, you would listen to him, wouldn't you?
Powhatan: Pocahontas...
Pocahontas: Wouldn't you?
Powhatan: Of course I would. But it is not that simple. Nothing is simple anymore.