Question for DIS waiters/waitresses

[KimR]

Does it make you uncomfortable when customers argue over who is going to pay the check? Whenever we go out to dinner with someone, it's inevitable the DH will insist on paying and an argument is bound to ensue over the check. I hate it. It makes me very uncomfortable and I always feel bad for our server who just stands there, not knowing what to do. It's ridiculous. At the very least, someone should just pay the check and then reconcile the issue outside of the restaurant. Don't put the server in the middle of it, their job is hard enough as it is.

 

[happygirl]

Does it make you uncomfortable when customers argue over who is going to pay the check? Whenever we go out to dinner with someone, it's inevitable the DH will insist on paying and an argument is bound to ensue over the check. I hate it. It makes me very uncomfortable and I always feel bad for our server who just stands there, not knowing what to do. It's ridiculous. At the very least, someone should just pay the check and then reconcile the issue outside of the restaurant. Don't put the server in the middle of it, their job is hard enough as it is.

No, as a server it doesn't bother me in the slightest, I will just put the ticket down and let them worry about it, I won't stand there while they try to figure it. I wouldn't worry about most server I know don't think twice about something like that.

 

[msjprincess]

I'm not a server but I think it's odd that they're just standing there while they discuss it. Usually a server will just leave the check and pick it up when you're ready.

 

[KimR]

Well, typically the server is standing there with the check and they are arguing over who it goes to. Last night, though, my MIL had paid while DH was away from the table. When DH found out, he told the waiter to cancel out the payment and take his card instead. So of course, my MIL objected and the argument ensued, with DH being the eventual winner. If I were a waitress, I'd hate to be in that position. In that case, I'd probably just say 'I'm sorry but the check has already been paid'.

 

[happygirl]

Well, typically the server is standing there with the check and they are arguing over who it goes to. Last night, though, my MIL had paid while DH was away from the table. So DH told the waiter to cancel out the payment and take his card instead. So of course, my MIL objected and the argument ensued, with DH being the eventual winner. If I were a waitress, I'd hate to be in that position. In that case, I'd probably just say 'I'm sorry but the check has already been paid'.

If that happened I would say I'm sorry the bill has been paid, In all my years of serving I have never had someone want me to cancel out a payment so someone else could pay.

 

[Acklander]

When i used to waitress it didn't bother me if people argued about it. That was their thing, not mine. usually i just left it there, if they did the argument when i brought the check over to the table on who to give it to, i'd usually smile and ask who the bigger tipper was, first one on the ball to speak up, got it. it was usually good for a laugh.

 

[bunkkinsmom]

I used to just say "Whoever gives me money first wins".

 

[lpereira]

20 years ago in college was the last time I waited tables. Usually I just put the check down and walked away. Once the table tried to involve me in it. I told guy A to pay the check and guy B to match it with the tip. Then ev eryone would win, especially me. They laughed thought it ws a good plan and did it. It was the only time I ever said that and I didn't expect itto work. I was just aiming to shut the argument down or get released from the middle of it.

 

[MIGrandma]

I was a waitress for over 12 years, yes it bothered me very much when people would argue in front of me over who was going to pay the check. Sometimes people would even say my tip depended on who I gave it to. Most times I would put it in the center of the table, tell everyone to "have a good night" and walk away.

 

[katesorad]

Well, typically the server is standing there with the check and they are arguing over who it goes to. Last night, though, my MIL had paid while DH was away from the table. When DH found out, he told the waiter to cancel out the payment and take his card instead. So of course, my MIL objected and the argument ensued, with DH being the eventual winner. If I were a waitress, I'd hate to be in that position. In that case, I'd probably just say 'I'm sorry but the check has already been paid'.

Sounds WAY too much like my family! Are we related??? The worst that happened was my father chased my grandmother through a rather upscale restaurant, arguing over the check. Now my grandma just learns to sit there and not say a word.. but once in a while she will sneak her card to the waiter while my dad isn't looking. Thank goodness I don't have to live there anymore..

 

[My2Cinderellas]

Well, typically the server is standing there with the check and they are arguing over who it goes to. Last night, though, my MIL had paid while DH was away from the table. When DH found out, he told the waiter to cancel out the payment and take his card instead. So of course, my MIL objected and the argument ensued, with DH being the eventual winner. If I were a waitress, I'd hate to be in that position. In that case, I'd probably just say 'I'm sorry but the check has already been paid'.

sounds like the issue is your DH - sorry! Asking to cancel a charge so he can be the alpha male and always pay is going way too far. Sometimes you just have to be gracious and say "thank you".

I used to set the bill in "neutral territory" on the table if it looked like it might be a fight - and then walk away.

When we go out and I think there might be a fight for the bill - I make sure to catch the server before the end of the meal and quietly ask for the bill to come to me. I much prefer to take care of this upfront and avoid the ugly scene.

 

[Nancyg56]

When I used to wait table I never cared who paid teh bill. If there was a discussion I would place teh bill in teh middle and leave. I would never ever be drawn into the kind of drama that your DH caused.

 

[lacrosse_lady72]

I usually just tell them sort of jokingly "I'll let you guys battle it out." Usually they decide quick enough, other times I just chit-chat with the other person(s), who are usually wives/girlfriends. I don't think its annoying or awkward but I feel like I'm really good at reading people and can use appropriate techniques to not make it weird but still quick.

 

[disneychrista]

I used to just say "Whoever gives me money first wins".

This is what I do too when I bartend.

 

[londonderrydisneyfan]

When I waited tables I would take the credit cards of the people who wanted to pay, put them in a napkin and then ask someone else at the table to pull one out. The card that was pulled out paid, it was a very easy way to settle the issue.

 

[MushyMushy]

Wow, how funny! I was just sitting in a restaurant tonight where a waitress was telling a couple of customers how she didn't want to get in the middle of this argument.

 

[paintnolish]

I always give it to whomever told me first. If it's at the same time, I set it in the middle and let them fight it out!