Purity Balls? Yuck

[chiefmickeymouse]

Yuck and Ick! My daughter would have to be sedated and straight jacketed to get her in the door of such an event. Not because she's against purity, but because it's just, well, icky!

I attended a weird church as a teen (my parents' choice) and they taught the "courting" thing, skirts always, no movies, rock music, etc. Three of the girls in our small youth group were pregnant before graduation.

 

[jrmasm]

Purity - gross
Vows of purity - gross
Purity rings - gross
Purity balls - gross



The whole concept is bizarre.

 

[ImDMous]

Yuck and Ick! My daughter would have to be sedated and straight jacketed to get her in the door of such an event. Not because she's against purity, but because it's just, well, icky!

I attended a weird church as a teen (my parents' choice) and they taught the "courting" thing, skirts always, no movies, rock music, etc. Three of the girls in our small youth group were pregnant before graduation.

It could also go completely the opposite way, still weird and not right. My cousin was raised in a church like that also. She's 22, still thinks boys are icky, won't stay home by herself and has no plans of moving out of my aunt and uncle's house. Teens need to grow up knowing about the other sex, the good and bad (age appropriately of course), and make up their own informed mind. Extreme sheltering just leads to extreme behavior.

And that is really not where my mind went when I read "purity balls". Ewwwww

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

Originally Posted by jdb in AZ
‘This is just a reminder that keeping yourself pure is important. So you keep this on your finger and from this point you are married to the Lord and your father is your boyfriend.’
"Married," with a boyfriend on the side -- Um, isn't that cheating?

With daddy no less.

 

[7165red]

Probably the same place mine went and I was NOT going to click that link here at work. LOL.

Me too.

 

[KatheeME]

That is creepy on many levels. A young girl's choice is admirable but to a blood relative? Let her make choices, with guidance, but this is way beyonds reasonable, safe boundaries.

 

[RitaE]

I really try not to judge another person's religious or moral code … but just the concept rating a person's "purity" by a natural biological function squicks me out and makes me want to go burn a couple of bras.

Do they have an "Impure Soiree" or something for those who have prematurely ruined themselves?

 

[mumto3girls]

I don't get the whole father is her boyfriend thing? Weird.

 

[SAMCRO]

Purity - gross
Vows of purity - gross
Purity rings - gross
Purity balls - gross



The whole concept is bizarre.

The whole concept of encouraging a young person to not be sexually promiscious is bizarre? Highly disagree with that statement.

The vows, rings, and balls I agree very gross.

 

[ReneeA]

I really try not to judge another person's religious or moral code … but just the concept rating a person's "purity" by a natural biological function squicks me out and makes me want to go burn a couple of bras.

Do they have an "Impure Soiree" or something for those who have prematurely ruined themselves?

Agree.

 

[pigletgirl]

The whole concept of encouraging a young person to not be sexually promiscious is bizarre? Highly disagree with that statement.

The vows, rings, and balls I agree very gross.

 

[ebtbmom]

So the message to these girls is pretty much that their worth is tied to their virginity. I was raised this way, it's really sad and didn't work out well for me.

I don't understand why the most religiously devout are completely obsessed with sex.

 

[luvsJack]

The whole concept of encouraging a young person to not be sexually promiscious is bizarre? Highly disagree with that statement.

The vows, rings, and balls I agree very gross.

The vow and the ring, I don't have an issue with. The ball? Is odd, to say the least.

IMHO and IME, the "vow" is just a promise a girl makes to herself and to God. Its not this big, huge, thing that needs to be made public or that needs a ceremony. And while sex may be a normal, body function; it is something that is best to wait until a person is mature enough to make a good decision about it. And by Christian beliefs should wait until marriage.

The rings are USUALLY understated and for the most part a simple band, with perhaps a small stone. Heck, it can be anything really. The idea is not the particular kind of ring it is just that it is something worn as a reminder to the girl/boy of their promise.





This "ball" seems to be using the vow of purity as another "celebration", and I don't think it should be that at all. Its almost like a marriage ceremony to her father and that is just strange. I think it sends the complete wrong idea to the girl.

SHE is in control of her body, or at least she should be, NOT her father and he can't "protect" her purity. Its like they are saying that control of this girl and her actions go from her father to her husband. Not a message that dd will ever get from me or anyone else.

 

[jrmasm]

The whole concept of encouraging a young person to not be sexually promiscious is bizarre? Highly disagree with that statement. The vows, rings, and balls I agree very gross.

The word purity is gross IMO. The idea that having sex before marriage = impure is gross. And having sex before marriage does not equal promiscuity.

I'm all for people making whatever decisions work for them but sharing that decision with others (vows, rings, balls) is just weird. I don't want to hear announcements about people's lack of sex life anymore than I do about their sex life.

 

[lauradis]

Wonder what they tell their sons?

Wonder what the rate of not keeping the promised vows are?

Wonder how many girls/teens are taken advantage of due to lack of education?

It's kinda sad that this primitive practice is still alive.

 

[luvsJack]

The word purity is gross IMO. The idea that having sex before marriage = impure is gross. And having sex before marriage does not equal promiscuity.

I'm all for people making whatever decisions work for them but sharing that decision with others (vows, rings, balls) is just weird. I don't want to hear announcements about people's lack of sex life anymore than I do about their sex life.

Gross seems like a very odd word to use. How is the word gross?

By Christian belief, sex without marriage is a sin so of course it would be discouraged.

Making a vow does not mean making a public announcement, normally.

While I agree that the whole purity ball idea is a little off to me, that doesn't mean the entire idea is off.

Its all in the teaching, imo.

 

[A_Princess'_Daddy]

The concept is disgusting, in my opinion, and deeply, deeply creepy. I agree with the confusion over the obsession that some seem to have with the sex lives of their daughters. If it's about avoiding sin, I am curious about how many also have sloth, greed, wrath, pride, gluttony, and envy vows, rings and balls for their daughters and sons (as well as for themselves, as those are always sins, even once married).

 

[RitaE]

I would agree that there are valid social, psychological, health and economic reasons that all young people should be taught in regards to sexual relations.

It is the entire idea that the act of sex can make one "impure, dirty, and shameful" that I find objectionable and damaging. And let's face it, these standards are traditionally applied to women much more than men in almost every human society. It's not too often that you hear of a 17 year old boy taken out of town and stoned death for his "impure behavior."

The idea of pretty dresses, jewelry and a party to celebrate sexual chastity might be a lot more palatable than the idea of stoning a girl or setting her on fire because she went "too far" with her boyfriend, but it is all on the spectrum of reward and punishment applied to a natural biological function.

 

[jrmasm]

Gross seems like a very odd word to use. How is the word gross? By Christian belief, sex without marriage is a sin so of course it would be discouraged. Making a vow does not mean making a public announcement, normally. While I agree that the whole purity ball idea is a little off to me, that doesn't mean the entire idea is off. Its all in the teaching, imo.

It's gross because if you're not pure, you're impure and that is a disgusting characterization of a person. Especially based on just one thing.

And unless a vow is taken in completely privacy, without no one else around, I would consider that to be public.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

I am NOT my daughter's "boyfriend".

I am, however the man with a shotgun, a shovel, and 5 acres out back