After thinking about this long and hard at school today, and talking with some of our older teachers, we came to an agreement... my flame suit is on, and this is in no way an attack on single parents at all, please don't take it as such.
I think that the evolution of needing ALL working parents in a household has a large play in it... about the time that the mothers started going back to work, (me included) and "feeling guilty" and "tired" has a lot to do with the problems in education. Why do I think that this may play a larger role than any one/two working parent household tend to like to think
1. My mother didn't work when I was very young. She was a presence in the school, as were many others, she attended every school night, parent-teacher conference, and what not. Generally available, not needing to worry about getting the time off, or being fired for missing work, or "too tired", or any of the multitude of excuses that I hear when trying to set up a meeting with a parent. Granted, there were some SaH moms who did better than others as far as involvement. My brother is 14 years younger than me, and mom did go back to work by then and it was night and day the difference in her involvement. I work at my children's school, I attend parent conferences, but only go to required evening events.
2. Anyone in the neighborhood was able to correct me, and called her to tell her what kind of trouble I was getting into... I wasn't a troublemaker, but if they even thought I might be heading in the wrong way, I got myself fussed at by them and again her... by the time my brother came, no one was able to tell us anything, no matter what we were doing. If they had a problem, they had to knock on the door, tell her, and most of the time all she did was say so and so said this, is it true (of course the answer was no) and it didn't go much further than that. This also included the school... which is too bad.
3. Children today seem to be more spoiled by things, and by that, don't seem to have as much appreciation for them. Cell phones are a dime a dozen. The only problem I have with them is that they tell you your child is "alive" but not where they are or what they are doing. After school, lots of kids are calling home saying they are heading home, when they are going in the opposite direction... even the honor students. Does that mean they are going to get into trouble, no, but it does mean they are lying and not thinking twice about it. They know when the parent is due home, call them at work to make sure they are there and going to stay there, go to a friends and come in just before the parent does. They have even shared directions for forwarding the home phone to the cell phone so if home is called, they can take the call.
Believe me, I know that I work because I need to just to survive. DH makes a decent salary, what in the 60-70's (when adjusted for inflation) would have been way more than adequate, but in today's world, aren't. Most single parents don't have a choice in the matter either. I have crunched numbers over and over but can't come up with a way to stay home yet.
This in no way excuses the fact that for too long, teachers who should have never been teachers have graced too many classrooms, generally in the worst schools. I even, and I shutter to say this, have a friend who went into teaching only because of summer vacation. No way I would let my kids into her classroom, but my kids go to public school and she sticks with the high priced private school where she can get away with her antics. My guess is if I was paying 12000 per year to send my kids to school, I would probally be even more vested in their education.