Pregnant High School Senior Denied Attendance At Graduation Ceremony

Codes of conduct are worthless unless they are universally applied.

This girl is getting a harsher punishment because her "mistake" is visible and can be an embarrassment to the school's lily clean image.

That is wrong. This girl is going to face a lifetime of troubles and uphill battles because of a decision she made. That she earned her degree anyway is commendable considering the backlash I'm sure she faced in the school.

Punishing the mother is despicable and is not in line with the Christianity I practice.

IF they punished the pot smokers and the drinkers and the other sexually active the way they are punishing her, that would be fine. But instead they are making her wear her scarlet letter of shame because her "mistake" is visible and hurts their image.
 
That was her choice. She could have eliminated the problem and marched in the ceremony. She chose otherwise and must accept the consequences.

I'm not concerned about any message the school should be sending. Their message is quite clear, don't get pregnant. Don't like it? Don't attend that school.

"Don't get pregnant" is not their message because pregnancy itself is not against the honor code. It is quite possible to get pregnant without breaking the honor code/being "immoral". Despite what most people assume, pregnancy outside of marriage does not always equal promiscuity.

The controversy is that students break the honor code all the time, but their "sins" are exempt from this severe a consequence. If everyone who breaks the honor code was not allowed to walk at graduation, I don't think there would be a story here. You are absolutely correct-- if you sign a contract then you should be held accountable if you break it. However, I'm sure there are plenty of kids who have had premarital sex (or have broken the honor code in some way) who are walking at graduation. Why should they not face the same consequence for the same offense? Because they don't have a big "scarlet A" across their abdomen for everyone to see? I believe this situation is all about appearances and has nothing to do with doling out the appropriate consequence for the action.

I mean if she had chosen to get an abortion, she would still be in all her offices and walking at graduation. So basically they are telling the next girl to get an abortion before anyone finds out.

I became pregnant at the end of my junior year in high school. My parents were told by an administrator that if I "happened to not be pregnant after summer break" then I would be allowed to continue in the program.
 

I don't see the story here. And I also don't agree with the people who say it's hypocrisy on the part of the school. It does sound like the administration is a bit full of themselves, but if you attend a school like that you agree to follow that code of conduct. If she had been caught vandalizing property or blatantly refused to follow dress code or had deliberately harmed someone or had been caught dealing drugs on campus, the consequences would have been the same if not harsher.

Teen pregnancy may be more common but that doesn't mean it's actually a positive thing and how hard is it to keep your legs closed for 4 years?

I went to a fairly liberal catholic school and everyone knew that if you violated the code of conduct you were at very least going tto be banned from school functions or leadership positions.
 
If she had been caught vandalizing property or blatantly refused to follow dress code or had deliberately harmed someone or had been caught dealing drugs on campus, the consequences would have been the same if not harsher.

That isn't true according to this story. Other teens were caught having premarital sex, and just received a one day suspension. The act and the violation were LITERALLY the same.

Teen pregnancy may be more common but that doesn't mean it's actually a positive thing and how hard is it to keep your legs closed for 4 years?

This is coming from a woman who has had 1 sexual partner her entire life (my DH). Wow. Teens have hormones raging through them and do not have fully developed judgment. It is exceptionally hard for many to resist the temptation. She was hardly the only senior who "couldn't keep her legs closed". She's the only one being burned at the stake for it.
 
Codes of conduct are worthless unless they are universally applied.

This girl is getting a harsher punishment because her "mistake" is visible and can be an embarrassment to the school's lily clean image.

That is wrong. This girl is going to face a lifetime of troubles and uphill battles because of a decision she made. That she earned her degree anyway is commendable considering the backlash I'm sure she faced in the school.

Punishing the mother is despicable and is not in line with the Christianity I practice.

IF they punished the pot smokers and the drinkers and the other sexually active the way they are punishing her, that would be fine. But instead they are making her wear her scarlet letter of shame because her "mistake" is visible and hurts their image.

This is exactly my issue with the story. I just couldn't put it into words.

sailorstitch
 
That isn't true according to this story. Other teens were caught having premarital sex, and just received a one day suspension. The act and the violation were LITERALLY the same.



This is coming from a woman who has had 1 sexual partner her entire life (my DH). Wow. Teens have hormones raging through them and do not have fully developed judgment. It is exceptionally hard for many to resist the temptation. She was hardly the only senior who "couldn't keep her legs closed". She's the only one being burned at the stake for it.

"Burned at the stake" is just a little bit hyperbolic. And hey, I was a teen girl too. I understand her perspective but there are always consequences. It must have occurred to her that pregnancy was a natural consequence of having sex. It's not like she didint know that. It's also not like she didn't know it was a violation of the student code. Caught or not caught, punished or not punished, she knew she was breaking the rules.

I agree that the school should more evenly apply the code of conduct but you realize that if they did that, it would not improve her situation? It would just get those other kids punished as well:confused3
 
For such a strict school, I don't think a two day suspension, being relieved of leadership roles, and skipping the graduation ceremony is too hard a punishment.

The article says most classmates and parents were generally supportive of her. Until she and her parents started whining to the media that she should be exempt from school policy. She's an adult now. Accept your punishment and move on.
 
I agree that the school should more evenly apply the code of conduct but you realize that if they did that, it would not improve her situation?

Yes, of course it was hyperbolic.

But I think it would improve her situation (temporarily). She wouldn't be being singled out and being made an example for something probably 50% of her class is doing anyway.
 
The controversy is that students break the honor code all the time, but their "sins" are exempt from this severe a consequence.

That isn't true according to this story. Other teens were caught having premarital sex, and just received a one day suspension. The act and the violation were LITERALLY the same.
Is there another article showing the school knows which other students are having premarital sex? The article in the OP doesn't.
 
Is there another article showing the school knows which other students are having premarital sex? The article in the OP doesn't.

I couldn't find anything specifically noting that. However, her father was apparently on the school's board and was previously someone who voted on disciplinary cases. He apparently knows that there were some more egregious violations of the school's student code that weren't punished as severely as not allowing a student's presence at graduation. And on top of that a graduating class of 14?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/loca...798cbc-4090-11e7-9869-bac8b446820a_story.html

Strangely enough, she's going to Bob Jones University. Their student code probably makes her previous school's code look tame.
 
I couldn't find anything specifically noting that. However, her father was apparently on the school's board and was previously someone who voted on disciplinary cases. He apparently knows that there were some more egregious violations of the school's student code that weren't punished as severely as not allowing a student's presence at graduation. And on top of that a graduating class of 14?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/loca...798cbc-4090-11e7-9869-bac8b446820a_story.html

Strangely enough, she's going to Bob Jones University. Their student code probably makes her previous school's code look tame.

She may not be accepted there much longer since this has gone national.
 
That was her choice. She could have eliminated the problem and marched in the ceremony. She chose otherwise and must accept the consequences.

I'm not concerned about any message the school should be sending. Their message is quite clear, don't get pregnant. Don't like it? Don't attend that school.

Yet the BOYS don't have ANY outward sign that they could have broken these same moral code. That's why the moral code of conduct are sexist and only ever punish the girl. If guys had any visible consequence of having sex, these moral "codes of conduct" would never exist. They are all about controlling women and girls, nothing more.
 
She may not be accepted there much longer since this has gone national.

I dunno. The code supposedly applies to actions that happen while one is a student, and right now there's a certain aspect of her carrying to term that might even be considered a plus.

However, I don't know about how anyone can really live with all the requirements there. I heard about some of the requirements they have in their student handbook. Apparently students can be punished for watching anything other than G movies.
 
I dunno. The code supposedly applies to actions that happen while one is a student, and right now there's a certain aspect of her carrying to term that might even be considered a plus.

However, I don't know about how anyone can really live with all the requirements there. I heard about some of the requirements they have in their student handbook. Apparently students can be punished for watching anything other than G movies.

Yeah I just know that any school can remove admissions and the fact that she has taken this all to the media an even stricter school may no longer see her as a good canadiate.
 
Yeah I just know that any school can remove admissions and the fact that she has taken this all to the media an even stricter school may no longer see her as a good canadiate.

I don't see any public school really caring. Not to get political, but she chose to have the baby and that can go a long way at Bob Jones U. They can overlook the previous "immorality" if she's otherwise a poster child and vows not to repeat the "transgression". There was a certain young woman who became a mouthpiece for premarital abstinence after having a child without being married. Of course she had another child, so maybe that didn't work out so well.
 
I couldn't find anything specifically noting that. However, her father was apparently on the school's board and was previously someone who voted on disciplinary cases. He apparently knows that there were some more egregious violations of the school's student code that weren't punished as severely as not allowing a student's presence at graduation. And on top of that a graduating class of 14?

https://www.washingtonpost.com/loca...798cbc-4090-11e7-9869-bac8b446820a_story.html

Strangely enough, she's going to Bob Jones University. Their student code probably makes her previous school's code look tame.

Oh, wow. Well, she hasn't learned anything about school choice apparently.

I have NO idea why you would complain about being punished for violating a religious school behavioral code and then GO ON to a conservative religious college. There is a reason I chose not to attend a Jesuit institution.

But what do you want to bet that the father voted for harsher punishments for the kids who were let off and then when it came to his own little sunbeam, he experienced a 180 in opinion.
 





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