Portable dvd player on plane??

[momofbgtwins]

If I have to wear earplugs so as not to hear your child's movie, tantrums, your constant reminders to behave, etc... how will I hear my children who want to ask me quietly to read them a story or play a game with them? My children (almost 4yo) fly frequently, and have been taught what behavior is, and isn't, acceptible, and the consequences for not behaving. And yes, they knew it at 2 yo, also.
Many children cry due to ear pain, and I think most people are sympathetic, especially if it appears that the parents are doing all they can to sooth the child. But the parents of a child that is out of control don't usually get sympathy because it calls into question their parenting effectiveness. Throwing in a DVD without earphones (because the child refuses to wear them - who's the boss here?) is just taking the easy way out for the parents.

 

[DaisyD]

I sure hope you were kidding in this statement. No one should give children perscription medicine that was not subcribed for them personally, they could easily be overdose from an adult strength perscribed amount.

I think DMRick was kidding but meant sharing the Xanax with the other passengers that had to listen to that kid. LOL!

 

[MyZoeJane]

I don't think it matters if you have kids or haven't. I've had three, and also have grandchildren that I travel with often..even overseas, which is a long flight. They've been flying all their lives. I also see very well behaved kids (no one said they aren't allowed to ever cry or fidget) with well prepared moms. We're not talking about the kids being rude, but the parents not being prepared, or thinking that it's OK, if they allow certain behavior, because the other passengers would rather have that, than crying. You are right..no one should give an evil eye, just because kids are boarding..and I didn't see where anyone said they did that. But you are flat our wrong that someone doesn't have the right to complain, if your child is listening to a toy that is annoying, or loud, or is kicking their seat or whatever. I certainly would have the right to complain if your child is kicking my seat. Very proper behavior.

For some reason, many seem to not be listening to the suggestions of how ot get your child to use headphones, or even suggestions of good ones to purchase. They seem to want to continue to explain why they shouldn't have to. I must have had really good kids and grands. If I said, no, you can't listen to the music without headphones, they would have known I meant it (the grands have DVD players and Gameboy..my own kids only had music). And they would have rathered used the headphones, than go without. They knew I meant it. I just would not want them to disturb our neighbors. The plane is small enough as it is, and I'm sure there were times when we disturbed our neighbors when I couldn't do anything about it (I know ears were a problem for one of our grands).

I agree with your post here, but somewhere along the lines this debate lost it's focus. I don't think you realize that your opinions really aren't that much different from those of us who were originally arguing that a DVD without headphones is sometimes the best option.

I will keep my daughter under control the best I can. I will bring her things to play with and prepare to the greatest extent possible for the flight. I do not have a sense of entitlement that leads me to believe that everyone ought to just "deal with" my child.

HOWEVER, my original comment was with regard to the children who WOULD NOT or COULD NOT keep headphones on (young children and children with sensory issues). My daughter is two. Perhaps you remember that age? The one that is usually prefaced by the adjective "terrible"? Anyhow, she has very sensitive ears. She will not keep headphones on and she is too young to respond to "my way or the highway." That's not bad parenting on my part, that is simply THE WAY TODDLERS ARE.

There is no doubt that a blaring DVD player is rude... but I honestly believe that you are arguing just for the sake of argument when you suggest that a DVD that is playing quietly is STILL not preferable to a very unhappy, overly fidgety, whining, kicking toddler.

We're not talking 5 year old here. We're talking about that very special little "breed" of children that we call TODDLERS. They're not rational. HOW could you have possibly forgotten this? I thought the toddler years scarred EVERY parent???

Indeed, my 4 year old will learn the law of the land... "Mommy is boss and I will make the nice pilot turn the plane around if you do not behave."

But for now, I have to settle for EVERY PIECE OF AMMO I'VE GOT!!!!! And if a QUIETLY playing DVD player is what gets pulled out when it's time to break out "the big guns", then that's what I am going to do. Maybe my kid will wear earphones once she stops being so sensitive about her ears... but for now, it's not an option.

I am NOT an inconsiderate witch. I am NOT clueless about what it means to be polite or considerate of those around me. But I also happen to believe that there ought to be a BALANCE between CONSIDERATION and UNDERSTANDING in this world of human suffering that we live in.

Rick, have you ever given any thought to the fact that MAYBE your kids and grandkids behave as well as they do NOT because they are exceptionally angelic kids or because they have exceptionally gifted parents, but because they have the benefit of having travelled so often and for such great distances? Perhaps you're not considering the fact that MANY children on planes have not travelled more than once or twice and it's still so new to them that their behavior ends up being expecially bad?

My argument is NOT based upon the notion of "I'll do what's best for me and let the rest of you poor souls suffer." Rather, it is based on the belief that TOLERANCE is an extremely important quality in a person and that it has all but disappeared in many people.

So, next time you get on a plane and you hear Mary Poppins singing "A Spoon Full of Sugar" ever so softly, turn your head and you might see my well-behaved little darling sitting in her carseat sufficiently distracted from kicking, climbing, whining, or crying.

You will also notice that no one in our

1. Smells bad
2. Takes up more than their fair share of a seat
3. Snores
4. Talks incessantly or loudly
5. Possesses any foul smelling food
6. Reads a giant newspaper
7. Reclines our seats
or
8. Pisses and moans about anyone who does any of the above.

I know that when I get on an airplane that I am going to encounter any number of these things and more. If I didn't feel prepared to deal with them, then I would drive, or buy my own plane, or simply stay home. This isn't about having a sense of entitlement, darling. It's about being realistic and letting go of the anger and frustration and irritation. When you do that... it really does wonders for your headache!

Relax... breathe... I promise I wont ever blare anything loud enough that you wont be able to tune it out.

And if you expect "courtesy" then perhaps you ought to learn how to properly spell it.

 

[DMRick]

There is no doubt that a blaring DVD player is rude... but I honestly believe that you are arguing just for the sake of argument when you suggest that a DVD that is playing quietly is STILL not preferable to a very unhappy, overly fidgety, whining, kicking toddler.:

I guess I haven't run into a quietly playing DVD on a plane wihtout headphones. Those darn engines make so much noise, no matter where you are on a plane, without headphones, it's near impossible to hear a DVD player without the sound way up. And they are usually up quite high. I am not arguing for the sake of argument LOL. I do have a problem with so many of you saying the choices are a DVD playing, or a very unhappy, overly fidgety, whining, kicking toddler. I can't remember my grands having all these problems from the first trip (I do remember my own kids also...way back in the stone age LOL). I do remember crying because of my grandson's ears..but not the whining or kicking..and he's been flying since he was a baby. We bring a lot of stuff that is new for the kids..and they seem to be very happy playing with it. When they want to listen to the DVD's (I guess they were always 2-3 or so when we started bringing them) they knew they had to use headphones. And they preferred wearing them, to not listening to the DVD player.
I have to say, that we seldom have a problem on a plane with kids..the parents usually have them under control and the kids ARE wearing headphones. When they haven't been, and the DVD is loud, someone has said something to the FA and she took care of it.

I don't think you realize that your opinions really aren't that much different from those of us who were originally arguing that a DVD without headphones is sometimes the best option.

No..you'd be putting words in my mouth. I'm pretty sure I said I didn't think that was the best option for me. I'm sure it is for a parent.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

All of us who have had kids have experienced the toddler years. A child that is 2 or 12 will do what they can get away with. It doesn't take them but once to realize throwing a tantrum will get them what they want. IMHO, the "terrible" 2's are nothing but an attempt to explain away bad behavior. I worked in a daycare for awhile. There was (23) 2 or young 3 year olds in the class. There was 1 child in the class that would have been considered going through their "terrible" 2's. The others all followed the rules whatever they may be, & were a joy to be around. That doesn't mean these kids were perfect, it simply meant that their parents didn't think being 2 was a reason to not behave. I've never met a 2 yo. who didn't know the meaning to the word no, if they knew you meant it. I've met quite a few who needed to be reminded what the rules were. That's being 2. Being incapable of understanding a rule isn't.

The thing that some of you don't seem to realize is that people will not be understanding of your child acting out then getting their way. If holding their legs mean they cry, the answer isn't to let them kick, it's to stop the crying. Noone's going to say, "I'm so glad they started playing that DVD, so that poor child didn't have to cry, because it wasn't allowed to kick my seat." That will be the last thing they're thinking. I'm not talking about physically restraining them to the point that it hurts. I would never have hurt my child either. However, it didn't hurt him for me to lay my arm over his leg as a reminder that kicking the seat in front of him wasn't acceptable.

Noone wants to see a child cry, because they're hurting. We all have compassion for that. Despite what some may think, people definitely don't want to hear them crying because they can't do what they want. Most people on those flights have raised kids. Some raised them before there were electronic devices to take when travelling. They know it's possible to for a child to fly w/o throwing a tantrum or doing other things that affect others.

If I didn't feel prepared to deal with them, then I would drive, or buy my own plane, or simply stay home.

This type of statement was what prompted me to reply to this thread in the 1st place. If I had known that my son most likely wouldn't be able to sit through a flight w/o kicking or listening to a movie w/o headphones, I wouldn't have expected others to drive or stay home. I would have been the one who needed to deal with the issue, & the one to make alternate arrangements. Noone should be taken into a situation that they aren't ready for.

 

[DMRick]

:This isn't about having a sense of entitlement, darling. It's about being realistic and letting go of the anger and frustration and irritation. When you do that... it really does wonders for your headache!
Relax... breathe... I promise I wont ever blare anything loud enough that you wont be able to tune it out.
And if you expect "courtesy" then perhaps you ought to learn how to properly spell it.

I'm not your "darling" and I forgot our spelling was being graded. I'm not sure what anger you are talking about, but I find your attitude and sarcasm very condescending. Oh..I hope I spelled everything correctly Could one of the teachers check my spelling..because if I spell courtesy wrong , I'm told not to expect it!

 

[ducklite]

I've said for years that families with children under about age six should be required to have seats in the back of the plane. Cluster them together. Here's why:

1. It eliminates the need for non-disabled "preboards." Everyone with younger kids gets on the plane first and has more time to settle in.

2. Parents of small kids are far more likely to be empathetic to other parents when kids act up.

3. Kids are far less likely to be upset if their seat is being kicked.

4. It gives them plenty of room to get things together before it's their turn to get off the plane.

5. They are closer to the galley and restrooms on most flights.

6. In case of emergency the FA's know where all the kids are and can give extra assistance in getting off the plane.

7. Parents wouldn't get the "Evil Eye" from childless passengers around them. Now that's not to say that other parents wouldn't give them one if their kids were out of control.

8. There would probably be less complaints if kids were watching DVD's without headphones or playing with noisy toys.

9. You wouldn't have to worry about the passenger next to your kid reading Playboy or watching a SITC DVD.

Anne

 

[hubermom3]

I agree with your post here, but somewhere along the lines this debate lost it's focus. I don't think you realize that your opinions really aren't that much different from those of us who were originally arguing that a DVD without headphones is sometimes the best option.

I will keep my daughter under control the best I can. I will bring her things to play with and prepare to the greatest extent possible for the flight. I do not have a sense of entitlement that leads me to believe that everyone ought to just "deal with" my child.

HOWEVER, my original comment was with regard to the children who WOULD NOT or COULD NOT keep headphones on (young children and children with sensory issues). My daughter is two. Perhaps you remember that age? The one that is usually prefaced by the adjective "terrible"? Anyhow, she has very sensitive ears. She will not keep headphones on and she is too young to respond to "my way or the highway." That's not bad parenting on my part, that is simply THE WAY TODDLERS ARE.

There is no doubt that a blaring DVD player is rude... but I honestly believe that you are arguing just for the sake of argument when you suggest that a DVD that is playing quietly is STILL not preferable to a very unhappy, overly fidgety, whining, kicking toddler.

We're not talking 5 year old here. We're talking about that very special little "breed" of children that we call TODDLERS. They're not rational. HOW could you have possibly forgotten this? I thought the toddler years scarred EVERY parent???

Indeed, my 4 year old will learn the law of the land... "Mommy is boss and I will make the nice pilot turn the plane around if you do not behave."

But for now, I have to settle for EVERY PIECE OF AMMO I'VE GOT!!!!! And if a QUIETLY playing DVD player is what gets pulled out when it's time to break out "the big guns", then that's what I am going to do. Maybe my kid will wear earphones once she stops being so sensitive about her ears... but for now, it's not an option.

I am NOT an inconsiderate witch. I am NOT clueless about what it means to be polite or considerate of those around me. But I also happen to believe that there ought to be a BALANCE between CONSIDERATION and UNDERSTANDING in this world of human suffering that we live in.

Rick, have you ever given any thought to the fact that MAYBE your kids and grandkids behave as well as they do NOT because they are exceptionally angelic kids or because they have exceptionally gifted parents, but because they have the benefit of having travelled so often and for such great distances? Perhaps you're not considering the fact that MANY children on planes have not travelled more than once or twice and it's still so new to them that their behavior ends up being expecially bad?

My argument is NOT based upon the notion of "I'll do what's best for me and let the rest of you poor souls suffer." Rather, it is based on the belief that TOLERANCE is an extremely important quality in a person and that it has all but disappeared in many people.

So, next time you get on a plane and you hear Mary Poppins singing "A Spoon Full of Sugar" ever so softly, turn your head and you might see my well-behaved little darling sitting in her carseat sufficiently distracted from kicking, climbing, whining, or crying.

You will also notice that no one in our

1. Smells bad
2. Takes up more than their fair share of a seat
3. Snores
4. Talks incessantly or loudly
5. Possesses any foul smelling food
6. Reads a giant newspaper
7. Reclines our seats
or
8. Pisses and moans about anyone who does any of the above.

I know that when I get on an airplane that I am going to encounter any number of these things and more. If I didn't feel prepared to deal with them, then I would drive, or buy my own plane, or simply stay home. This isn't about having a sense of entitlement, darling. It's about being realistic and letting go of the anger and frustration and irritation. When you do that... it really does wonders for your headache!

Relax... breathe... I promise I wont ever blare anything loud enough that you wont be able to tune it out.



AMEN

 

[taximomfor4]

I've said for years that families with children under about age six should be required to have seats in the back of the plane. Cluster them together. Here's why:

1. It eliminates the need for non-disabled "preboards." Everyone with younger kids gets on the plane first and has more time to settle in.

2. Parents of small kids are far more likely to be empathetic to other parents when kids act up.

3. Kids are far less likely to be upset if their seat is being kicked.

4. It gives them plenty of room to get things together before it's their turn to get off the plane.

5. They are closer to the galley and restrooms on most flights.

6. In case of emergency the FA's know where all the kids are and can give extra assistance in getting off the plane.

7. Parents wouldn't get the "Evil Eye" from childless passengers around them. Now that's not to say that other parents wouldn't give them one if their kids were out of control.

8. There would probably be less complaints if kids were watching DVD's without headphones or playing with noisy toys.

9. You wouldn't have to worry about the passenger next to your kid reading Playboy or watching a SITC DVD.

Anne

Can families "test out" of those seats? Like do a 3-hour simulated flight? Pretty please?

 

[brandylouwho]

Yes, you are right, I was responding quickly and clearly not thinking...wanted to move on to more productive threads. It is the bass in my brothers car that bangs, but not through the iPod headphones. Good thing the human brain can usually sort that stuff out and make sense of it even though the info presented was imperfect in nature. Amazing creatures, we are.


Anyway, I suspect you and everyone else could still understand my point...life is full of inconveniences and things we must tolerate. While flying with my 2 year old the DVD player is our last ditch effort when her patience is waning. (I hate the whole let the TV babysit the kid mentality, but sometimes it is a great help for a moment of peace). I doubt we'll even need it on our next trip to Disney (short flight), but it will be along, just in case. And we'll have head phones along too (the ones form kidzgear...great fit for kids), but if worse comes to worse...and for some reason taking the headphones off is what works... well, so be it. Yes, it is my choice and I am not afraid to make it.

Hey, maybe they should put all kids at the front of the plane, no one to kick in the first row, when facing forward our voices carry forward, there are rest rooms at the front too, no one to be bothered by the dvd player in the row ahead of the kid. Oh wait, that is where first class is. Must be a better location, so that would probably tick someone off too!

And I have been given the old evil eye while boarding with a kid, that whole "I hope they aren't sitting next to me" look. Thankfully, my daughter is a pretty well behaved kid and flying occassionally keeps her accustomed to it...and helps her to learn how to behave in the air. Now, towards the end of that long flight we took was another story, but who isn't tried of flying by that point? Toddlers just have less control over themselves than adults...those tantrums and the "I can do it myself!" response is part of learning independence and control.

I also usually take an iPod (or long ago, a walkman) to drown out the other noises in the air and to just make the time pass more quickly. I know that there may be things that annoy me (in the air or life in general) and I do my best to handle them on my own instead of making a big stink. I know plenty of people who would rather make a big stink about even the smallest problem than just shut up and deal with it.

After rereading some of these posts...I tend to think the rare/truly mean people are not DISers, even most of those arguing against me seem to have their heart in the right place. (DMRick I mean you...I oppose your POV, but appreciate your debate..I think you at least make some sense and aren't trying to just be a meanie for the sake of being a meanie)

Yet, I still say a dvd without earphones (and kept low) is not a reason to give me an F in parenting/manners when the best made plans and even last ditch effort "tricks" of parenting have failed.

Try to remember that next time you find yourself in a similar situation. Is it worth crabbing about and making others around you feel even more uncomfortable or bad? Or could you just maybe see it from another's Point of View and choose to buy those cheap headphones in flight...and listen to the music if the kids movie is so annoying? I bet that most (yes, not all but most) parents have already tried their best to keep their kids in order while flying...and maybe that dvd is their last ditch effort too. Don't assume they are bad parents or feel entitled or any of that...any given day and given moment, you never know what sort of mood a little kid will be in.

As for school aged kids...that is another story. As long as they aren't developmentally disabled, they probably should be able to follow rules and be able to reason with (more than a 3 year old at least).

Now the kicking the seat is a bit harder to overcome, escape or ignore, but as long as the kids isn't truly having a big kicking like crazy fit, I bet that is even tolerable at least for a little while! Sometimes that is where the evil eye comes in handy...a look from a stranger can be worth a thousand attempts on a parents part to make a kid stop...then again maybe it will only make the kid start crying. You never know with kids!


OK, to end on a helpful and positive note: try to have well rested & fed kids (always a help in any situation), try to accommodate for ear pain (earplanes, gum, decongestant, whatever), have snacks and drinks in your carry on, have quiet toys like paper & crayons, books, magna doodles, stickers and paper or reusable surfaces to stick them on, try to hide the fact the dvd player is along--use it as a last resort, aqua doodles (and water to refill the pen), deck of cards, uy a few new items like this to surprise them during the flight...you get the drift. These go a long way in amusing kids.

Don;t be afraid to fly with kids and don't get overly worked up or feel bad if they don't sit perfectly still and quiet!

 

[MyZoeJane]

Brandylouwho, I love your sentiments but sometimes differing opinions are only ever going to be just that... differing opinions.

All we can do is hope that we are surrounded by as many tolerant and kind people as possible in any given situation. There are always going to be the people who feel entitled to judging us, our parenting, our children, our choices... and those people need our tolerance and understanding more than anyone. I don't mean that to sound condescending... it is simply a lesson that my mother taught me and that I hope to teach my own daughter, as well. We really can be happier when we are not clinging so tightly to our personal belief of what is wrong or right. I'm not talking about major principles like killing or stealing... you know what I mean. Sometimes it makes us a better person to do what we can to look at a situation from ANOTHER POINT OF VIEW.

My point of view in this discussion happens to be one that believes a child has the right to a quiet DVD just as much as an adult has the right to a reasonably quiet conversation. Show me a person who would ask a flight attendant to request that two people "stop talking" on a flight and I will show you a person who would truly benefit from fidning something better to do with his or her time. If the DVD cannot be heard at a reasonable level, then perhaps the child ought to have their hearing checked? Once a plane is in the air I've never had difficulty being heard while speaking in a soft voice, and the last time we flew, my daughter was perfectly happy listening to her VideoNow, WHICH by the way, is not CAPABLE of being very loud. And the people around us were kind enough to not ask the FA to make me turn it off.

Maybe that's why I don't get headaches very often? I think about the other person's point of view and I just let go?

All we can do is our best to lead by example. Tolerance and understanding can only multiply when we show MORE tolerance and understanding... It doesn't multiply when we try to force our beliefs upon another person. This petty issue regarding a DVD player could easily be applied to any number of situations in which people disagree.

What it comes down to is a sentiment that Maya Angelou said very eloquently: "You do what you know, and when you know better, you do better."

In my life, I have learned that "better" means rising above intolerance and finding peace through simply "letting go." Some people might deem this a "pipe dream" and some people might think I'm smoking some kind of happy drug. But truly, there is peace and happiness to be found when we mentally "walk a mile....". You know the rest.

 

[DMRick]

Each of your notes is more insulting and condescending than the next. You seem to feel, that we are not being tolerant if we don't want to listen to your child's DVD player. You have a way of just putting dig after dig in..for instance the headaches you keep mentioning..as if there is something wrong with someone because they get headaches from listening to the same music on a DVD over and over and over. You actually think a person can just "let it go" and there goes the headache LOL? I don't know what airline you fly on, but we fly on ones with engines..and it's hard to speak very softly and be heard..it's even harder to listen to a movie without headphones and be heard. I think you are expecting a lot of your children.
Who are you to tell us we can be happier, if we agree with you LOL? You are too funny. You have a hard time looking at any point of view, except your own..reread your notes! You want it your way, and if others around you are bothered..well they are the intolerant, nasty ones. You keep trying to force your belief on others (such as we must want to hear the DVD player over your screaming child..we just must) and then give a speech on intolerance.
Take a better look at this thread. People are asking you to be considerate..and you keep coming up with how it's up to the other people to be tolerant..etc. Full of excuses why your child should be allowed to be annoying. Maybe the people next to you didn't ask the FA to have your daughter turn her toy down..but it's possible they wil try to NOT be in a seat next to a child again..for fear the mom will hand the child a toy that makes noise.
Most people understood just what the point of this whole debate was..teach your children they are sharing space..and headphones are a good way to do that. If your DVD is quiet and the only person who can hear it is your child..then you don't even have to give it another thought, and I'm not sure why you are even posting. Most aren't that quiet..and they are often sharing with more than one child..which means the sound has to be up.
For those of you who have listened and have appreciated the advice..I thank you for understanding just what most of us here have been trying to say.

For any of you that may not be tolerant of spelling errors...please forgive me for not proof reading

Brandylouwho, I love your sentiments but sometimes differing opinions are only ever going to be just that... differing opinions.

All we can do is hope that we are surrounded by as many tolerant and kind people as possible in any given situation. There are always going to be the people who feel entitled to judging us, our parenting, our children, our choices... and those people need our tolerance and understanding more than anyone. I don't mean that to sound condescending... it is simply a lesson that my mother taught me and that I hope to teach my own daughter, as well. We really can be happier when we are not clinging so tightly to our personal belief of what is wrong or right. I'm not talking about major principles like killing or stealing... you know what I mean. Sometimes it makes us a better person to do what we can to look at a situation from ANOTHER POINT OF VIEW.

My point of view in this discussion happens to be one that believes a child has the right to a quiet DVD just as much as an adult has the right to a reasonably quiet conversation. Show me a person who would ask a flight attendant to request that two people "stop talking" on a flight and I will show you a person who would truly benefit from fidning something better to do with his or her time. If the DVD cannot be heard at a reasonable level, then perhaps the child ought to have their hearing checked? Once a plane is in the air I've never had difficulty being heard while speaking in a soft voice, and the last time we flew, my daughter was perfectly happy listening to her VideoNow, WHICH by the way, is not CAPABLE of being very loud. And the people around us were kind enough to not ask the FA to make me turn it off.

Maybe that's why I don't get headaches very often? I think about the other person's point of view and I just let go?

All we can do is our best to lead by example. Tolerance and understanding can only multiply when we show MORE tolerance and understanding... It doesn't multiply when we try to force our beliefs upon another person. This petty issue regarding a DVD player could easily be applied to any number of situations in which people disagree.

What it comes down to is a sentiment that Maya Angelou said very eloquently: "You do what you know, and when you know better, you do better."

In my life, I have learned that "better" means rising above intolerance and finding peace through simply "letting go." Some people might deem this a "pipe dream" and some people might think I'm smoking some kind of happy drug. But truly, there is peace and happiness to be found when we mentally "walk a mile....". You know the rest.

 

[shades]

I'm bored today....I hope this thread doesn't get closed

 

[DMRick]

After rereading some of these posts...I tend to think the rare/truly mean people are not DISers, even most of those arguing against me seem to have their heart in the right place. (DMRick I mean you...I oppose your POV, but appreciate your debate..I think you at least make some sense and aren't trying to just be a meanie for the sake of being a meanie)

And while I may not agree with all of your point of views (just as you don't agree with mine ), I appreciate the way you post..without insults or innuendo's. Sounds like you are prepared to do the best you can, and I'll assume you will try the headphones. By the way..no music to listen to on SW with cheap headphones....they are a no frills plane. I do have my own DVD to listen too..but sometimes the louder DVD's come right over that..and it seems the parents just don't realize it. I find more problems overhearing the players, however, sitting in back of kids and not in front. Because they preboard, we are often able to get back further ourselves..but that's just from the under 5 group.

 

[brandylouwho]

I'm bored today....I hope this thread doesn't get closed

Be forewarned that being bored one day at work is how I got sucked into this sinister "discussion." I didn't mean to start posting or expressing an opinion. Something came over me and it just happened. It's been kind of fun though. I didn't mean to get people more riled up, well, maybe I did.

 

[tarheelmjfan]

My definition of being the better person is one who makes every attempt to not negatively affect others. They will gladly put themselves out in order to acheive that. To expect everyone to be accepting of your choices isn't sharing tolerance it's being selfish. You can spin it any way you want, but the facts don't change. Most people are very tolerant of things that can't be controlled. Some children will be louder because of disabilities. I think anyone would be tolerant of that. To be honest, I've sat with kids kicking my seat an entire flight & not said a word. I've also looked over temper tantrums more than once. It's not as easy to ignore the fact that someone will admit in advance that's it's probably going to happen & I should just be tolerant of it. How am I supposed to see this as anything other than selfishness & a total disregard for others? FWIW, noone ever blames the child, when they act out.

 

[shades]

.....And I have been given the old evil eye while boarding with a kid, that whole "I hope they aren't sitting next to me" look.

This is a funny statement! Usually, I give it because I'm packed into the middle of a full aiplane and there is one last seat available - an aisle seat - right next to me. I'm sure lots of people can relate - sitting on a airplane that is already pastdue its departure - and just when I think the seat will be MINE, somebody comes running down the aisle with more crap than the overhead bins can accomodate.

Actualllllly, my dd is quite the world traveler and has flown several times over "the pond" (ocean. Her first overseas trip was when she was 3. She was a perfect angel from CA to STL and then on to Philly. From there, we flew to the Azores (5hrs), stopped for gas & passengers for 2hrs and, of course - everybody had to deplane (military installation). From there, we flew to Italy (5-ish hrs) repeated the same deplane process, got back on the plane and flew to Turkey. By the time we arrived in Turkey, we had been travelling for almost 2 days and she had enough of getting off airplanes. She had been PERFECT all of the way up until the very end. I was called off the plane before any other passengers ('cause, well, I'm special like that - nah, really I was just a new person in the unit that happened to run the airport on the installation and they always gave new people "special" treatment), and I get up, collect our stuff and go to pick up my sleeping little angel and she threw a HUGEEEEEEEEEEEE crying, kicking tantrum in front of an entire commercial LARGE airplane that was full of very tired people. She kept hanging on the anything she could grab on the seat - she just wanted to sleep. She is basically uncontrollable/inconsoleable (sp?) for the duration of the time we were in a controlled area (Turkish Customs & Immigration). What an introduction that was for me to my new unit and the people I'd have to work with (customs & Immigration) for the next 3 years!

She has flown a lot since then and a lot within CONUS before her overseas flight. Her first flight was when she was 5 mos. old and people actually told me while deplaning that "she is such a good baby" because she truly was a total angel for the duration of the flight - happy, laughing, smiling at everybody. Needless to say, my arms felt like there were going to fall off because I had been holding her and bouncing her for a 4 hr flight to keep her happy. There was a flight attendant that held her for about 15-20min ('cause she was such a cute baby 0 so I had a little break - but, I think in general - most parents do what they must to keep their kids happy to avoid upsetting people around them. I don't mind the music, and if your kid is watching a Disney animated movie and I'm behind you, I'll probably watch it to through the crack between the seats. I watched Mulan like this before, but - I couldn't hear it because it was turned down low. I will say, my hearing is not the greatest, either. Neither is my memory, so - unless some kid makes my flight really miserable (kicking the back of my seat and/or constanting opening and slamming the tray table closed), I'll likely not remember the child or the parent beyond the flight. As soon as the aisle opens up at arrival and I'm able to walk off the plane, all is forgotten and life is good again. Especially, when I arrive in Orlando and get to ride their monorail-train, the first ride and last ride in Florida during every Disney trip.

 

[kinntj]

Interesting...hard to say now that I have kids - but I think I would have voted for 'shut that kid up even if I have to listen to music' even before I had kids. I know I've had some cranky kids near me on planes and IMO ANYTHING is better than listening to that.

Sounds like we've got opinions on both sides of this one. I wonder what the people sitting around us would prefer...

I personally think the rude thing is allowing your child to disturb others' flights without doing everything in your power to try to stop that disruption. Obviously, 2 year olds have tantrums and that might not be able to be avoided, but I'm willing to do anything in my power to keep my child happy and entertained so that others around me can have a more enjoyable flight. I guess some people would rather listen to the tantrum for an hour or two. Good to know, I'll keep it in mind. Although my guess is I'd get more sour looks for that than I would for the Baby Mozart video. Just a guess tho.

Thanks for the feedback.

I agree with you! We had our 2 1/2 year old (now 4) fly from California to Michigan with no headphones and played Elmos World on the laptop. Not one complaint from anyone and when we were ready to get off, the people around us (old and young alike) commented on how cute and well behaved she had been. I think they all didn't mind listening to Elmos whining voice over her crying and kicking the seats. JMHO. We did ask the people across the aisle and the ones in front if the volume was too high. It might be a good idea to ask just to let them know you're thinking about their comfort too. Our DD would never allow headphones on and there's not too many other activities for that age group to do that doesn't involve messes or things getting thrown. They do like those magnadoodle travel thingys though, so that's another suggestion.

Just have fun!

 

[taximomfor4]

People tolerating rude behavior does not make the behavior LESS rude.

 

[brandylouwho]

You are comparing apples and oranges. The things you mentioned cannot be resolved during a flight. A child listening to a movie on a plane without earphones is a choice -- someone having the sniffles or sneezing is not. If someone's music through earphones is loud and disturbing other passengers, the FA will have them turn it down. Seen it happen.

We are apparently apallingly strict with our kids. If we told them they could watch a movie, but ONLY with earphones, they would know we meant it. If they wouldn't wear the earphones, they would not watch the movie. If I went onto the plane knowing they would not wear earphones, I would not bother to carry on the DVD player since it would not be of use to us.

Yep. a choice I am free to make , did make once, and can't say that I won't in the future (hopefully none of you are on my flight!!!). At that time I did not knowingly go with the knowledge my 24 mos and 2 week year old wouldn''t wear the headphones, so I did take the dvd player. As previously stated, she wore them for quite a while and liked having the headphones on at first, but the end of a long flight caused some problems which included a dvd player wihtout headphones and some crying--sobbing actually.

Funny thing is I didn't notice or hear any complaints or evil eyes that time. So it must have not been THAT disturbing to my fellow passengers or I must have been flying with excessively kind, tolerant people.

I am not suggesting that we should go and blare our dvd for entire flight, but I am suggesting that those who think think playing a dvd without headphones is "like the worst thing ever a parent could do" are living in a fantasy land much less realistic than Disney itself.

I secretly want to play the dvd player on our next flight just to watch peple's reactions (just for a few minutes...as an experiment) JUST KIDDING!!!