Polygamy, A Poll

[Maleficent13]

I'm curious...do you have strong feelings about polygamy, and if so, why?

Poll coming.

 

[RitaZ.]

I don't like the idea of "sharing", if you know what I mean. It's not something that I could live with or accept.

 

[In a hurry]

I voted really wrong, because every time I have seen or heard of polygamists, they are men who have total power/control over the women married. And many times these "women" are extremely young.

 

[NMAmy]

I don't like the idea of "sharing", if you know what I mean. It's not something that I could live with or accept.

Me, too, Rita.

You know, every time I see polygamists on tv, it just creeps me out--particularly since their new wives are always about dd's age.

Great idea for a poll, though, Mal. I'm agin it, myself.

 

[WDWMom]

I don't like the idea of "sharing", if you know what I mean. It's not something that I could live with or accept.

I agree, plus it is illegal. And if a man has 6 wives and 18 children who supports that many people? From what I have read and seen, most polygimists are on welfare.

 

[Sir Real]

More than one set of in-laws???? Not for me.

 

[BillSears]

It's not my style but if adults what to do it I can't see why they should be prevented. Of course I'm also for same sex marraiges so I'm fairly liberal on letting others do what they want with thier sex life.

 

[binny]

More than one set of in-laws???? Not for me.

Amen~~~


BTW, beyond really wrong and into the realm of just plain icky.



I dont share well.

 

[In a hurry]

It's not my style but if adults what to do it I can't see why they should be prevented. Of course I'm also for same sex marraiges so I'm fairly liberal on letting others do what they want with thier sex life.

I see your point. I would agree if it weren't for the fact that these girls seem to be given to the men at really young ages (13 - 16). They aren't consenting adults, iMO. So I guess it comes down to polygamy as a concept or a reality!

 

[Maleficent13]

I admit I started thinking about this today because of the "Big Love" thread, but a few weeks ago NPR had an interview with an attorney who was wife # 4, I believe, of a 6 wife family. They had something like 30 kids between them. Four of the wives worked outside the home, and they all paid one of the other wives to quit her job and stay home to provide daycare.

This woman was educated, intelligent, and well-spoken. It was interesting to me.

 

[momrek06]

I voted really wrong, because every time I have seen or heard of polygamists, they are men who have total power/control over the women married. And many times these "women" are extremely young.

I agree!

 

[LukenDC]

It's not my style but if adults what to do it I can't see why they should be prevented. Of course I'm also for same sex marraiges so I'm fairly liberal on letting others do what they want with thier sex life.

I'm with you, but like others I'm concerned about the young teens who get mixed up with polygamists. It's a lifestyle that seems to generate a lot of abuse of women. Many polygamists are involved with religious cults where there is brainwashing and intimidation of members.

It's disgraceful that there are polygamist colonies in the USA with underage girls being victimized by much older men. I wish that the government would do something to help those young ladies.

 

[sha_lyn]

Absolutly fine as long as it is between consenting adults. It's non of my business what other adults want to do. I actually know several people who are polyamerous. Non of them are in relationships with minors, nor does any of the relationships involve abuse.

 

[ElizabethB]

It is absolutely wrong. Why -- because the children suffer immeasurably. I grew up in Utah. Believe me -- I've seen it first hand and I know.

 

[jonestavern]

in theory, I think it's okay. reality is a different kettle of stinky fish-

As OP noted, it seems an awful lot of these wives have been or are married when very young. I add most of them have never had a chance to be away from the 'group think' of their communities. For group marriage to be reasonable the brides would have to be over 21 & out of the community for at least a year--so how would that be enforcible???
Laws regarding the eligibility for welfare or other state/federal assistance would have to be revamped to prevent these unions from taking unfair advantage of an already overburdened system.
I must say I find the number of children fathered by one man quite disturbing , but that is another thread~
I found the NPR program interesting, also. I do feel very sad regarding the many women who have spent all their lives in a suffocating atmosphere without a window on the world & deprived of informed choices that are available to most of us.
As for what an intelligent, mature, out in the world female chooses to do, that's her decision, as long as I am not expected to finance that decision.
I am definitely opposed to the ridiculous amount of children a polygamist husband--or any other human--feels entitled to create

Jean

 

[Maleficent13]

I am definitely opposed to the ridiculous amount of children a polygamist husband--or any other human--feels entitled to create

This is an interesting statement to me. What exactly is an acceptable number of children for one person to create?

 

[beckmrk04]

I'm with you, but like others I'm concerned about the young teens who get mixed up with polygamists. It's a lifestyle that seems to generate a lot of abuse of women. Many polygamists are involved with religious cults where there is brainwashing and intimidation of members.

It's disgraceful that there are polygamist colonies in the USA with underage girls being victimized by much older men. I wish that the government would do something to help those young ladies.

I agree too. In theory- I could care less if people want to share spouses. But in reality, that's not all that goes on. And you never see a woman with a ton of kids and a bunch of husbands. Hmmm... I've got one husband, and that's more than enough! I can't imagine trying to look after any more!

If it weren't for the rampant abuses that take place in such situations, then I really wouldn't care.

 

[pearlieq]

I see your point. I would agree if it weren't for the fact that these girls seem to be given to the men at really young ages (13 - 16). They aren't consenting adults, iMO. So I guess it comes down to polygamy as a concept or a reality!

That's exactly how I feel. Academically, I guess I don't have a problem with it. But in reality, the women tend to be subjugated and abused, and often married very young--before they can really offer consent, IMO.

I also think it changes the scope of marriage. I always thought the best thing about marriage was that is was a special, intimate relationship that two people shared exclusively with each other. From what I read about polygamous relationships, it seems to be more about "serving" and breeding than a special love.

 

[pearlieq]

This is an interesting statement to me. What exactly is an acceptable number of children for one person to create?

Are you trying to be incendiary or are you actually asking an honest question looking for information?

I think there is a definite limit on how many kids a responsible adult should create. The number might be different for some, but factors like the health of the mother/father, their ability to support the kids, and larger concerns about population control/resource management should be taken into account.

Others might not agree, but I really can't see a reasonable justification for having 8, 10, or more children, which is very common among polygamous "families".

 

[NMAmy]

I admit I started thinking about this today because of the "Big Love" thread, but a few weeks ago NPR had an interview with an attorney who was wife # 4, I believe, of a 6 wife family. They had something like 30 kids between them. Four of the wives worked outside the home, and they all paid one of the other wives to quit her job and stay home to provide daycare.

This woman was educated, intelligent, and well-spoken. It was interesting to me.

And here I thought this was your roundabout way of getting me to share DH with you!

But 30 kids does seem excessive. Also, I wonder how many people think polygamy in theory is ok but are adamantly against gay marriage and spout the old One Man, One Woman thing.