Polygamy, A Poll

[jonestavern]

This is an interesting statement to me. What exactly is an acceptable number of children for one person to create?

as I said, it's another thread-Wow! I can see where that discussion could be a real reason to pop the corn
I do feel many folks look askance when a woman has a passle of children, yet how many men have ever had anyone roll their eyes?
In the case of polygamists--or men w/multiple partners, serially or otherwise--I think when a fellow fathers a dozen or more children--& some of the totals in these polygamist marriages are pretty astounding --he needs to ask himself: is he glutting the market? is there really that much of a call for his genetic material?!
I say this & my Mom is one of 14 children~

Jean

 

[In a hurry]

as I said, it's another thread-Wow! I can see where that discussion could be a real reason to pop the corn
I do feel many folks look askance when a woman has a passle of children, yet how many men have ever had anyone roll their eyes?
In the case of polygamists--or men w/multiple partners, serially or otherwise--I think when a fellow fathers a dozen or more children--& some of the totals in these polygamist marriages are pretty astounding --he needs to ask himself: is he glutting the market? is there really that much of a call for his genetic material?!
I say this & my Mom is one of 14 children~

Jean

Glutting the market with his genetic material! That is it exactly!

I have no problem with large families who can support themselves. It's their business, and most of the people I know raised in large families were relatively happy with it. But...I can't imagine the motivation for producing those numbers multiplied by the number of wives. That need is just a bit creepy to me!

 

[jgmklmhem]

Glutting the market with his genetic material! That is it exactly!

I have no problem with large families who can support themselves. It's their business, and most of the people I know raised in large families were relatively happy with it. But...I can't imagine the motivation for producing those numbers multiplied by the number of wives. That need is just a bit creepy to me!

Not to mention the closed nature of these communities. I mean at what point does inbreeding become a concern. The women are not the only ones abused. There are many stories of young men being run out of the community because they start being competition to their fathers for more wives and such.

 

[In a hurry]

Good grief...it's like tom cats!

 

[sha_lyn]

None of those I know who are polyamerous have more than 1 child in the home.
One family I know of, the man does have 2 grown daughter, and the woman has one teenage son. I don't know their current living situation (move out of the country) but both are polyamerous.
I also know of a family with a teenage daughter. the "wife"is bisexual and has a husband (it is their child) and a wife.

another situation involves a once married couple who mutually decided to end the marriage to have monogamous relationships with their "other" partner. Each woman in this relationship has a child from previous relationships (one from a monogamous marriage, the other from a monogamous live in relationship)

 

[sha_lyn]

Poly relationships exist outside of the religious "closed" communities that are probably more cultish than anything else. It is just that those are the situations that are in the public eye. You would be surprised at how many of your average, active in the local community citizens engaged in poly relationships.

 

[Maleficent13]

Are you trying to be incendiary or are you actually asking an honest question looking for information?

Me? Incendiary?

I just find it interesting. Really.

And here I thought this was your roundabout way of getting me to share DH with you!

Darn it, you figured me out!!

 

[WatchinCaptKangaroo]

It's not my style but if adults what to do it I can't see why they should be prevented. Of course I'm also for same sex marraiges so I'm fairly liberal on letting others do what they want with thier sex life.

 

[mainewmn]

I don’t like double dipping so I voted really icky!

 

[LindsayDunn228]

Are you trying to be incendiary or are you actually asking an honest question looking for information?

I think there is a definite limit on how many kids a responsible adult should create. The number might be different for some, but factors like the health of the mother/father, their ability to support the kids, and larger concerns about population control/resource management should be taken into account.

Others might not agree, but I really can't see a reasonable justification for having 8, 10, or more children, which is very common among polygamous "families".

Great post!!!

 

[BillSears]

I think most of the reasons given for being against polygamy here are not really concerning polygamy.

No one here is saying that people should be marrying 13 year olds. Or having more children then they can support. But polygamy or monogamus relationships can produce either result. This would be like saying that sex should be banned because people commit rape.

I think the perceived problem with polygamy is because of the weird religious cults that often practice it. So ban religious cults not polygamy.

 

[FroggyinArk]

More than one set of in-laws???? Not for me.

in the words of binny...


amen.

 

[disneynutt1225]

I don't like to share and that's one of the reasons I voted against them.

Can you be monogamous with people you are in a polyamorous relationship with? Does that make sense?

 

[Dakota_Lynn]

I simply don't care what other people do in their bedrooms as long as kids and abuse aren't part of the equation.

 

[binny]

in the words of binny...


amen.

hey friend, how are you??

 

[Banzai]

I am not sure how I feel. I have friends at my college who are polyamourous and it works fine for them, but I don't think I would be my bag.

 

[VSL]

Not for me thanks.

Others can do what they want though..

 

[va32h]

It's not my style but if adults what to do it I can't see why they should be prevented.

Theoretically, I agree, but marriage confers certain legal rights on a spouse, and on a practical level, I'm not sure how those rights could be shared.

Which spouse would be next of kin in terms of inheritance, making health care decisions, which spouse would be entitled to Social Security benefits, which spouse would receive benefits coverage from an employer (would an employer who provides insurance for spouses be required to cover ALL spouses - yikes, what a can of worms).

What if one of the wives got a divorce; how would assets be divided so as not to unfairly disadvantage the other wives.

These are some logistical reasons why I would oppose legalizing polygamy.

Now if a man chose to have one "legal" wife, and several "spiritual" wives, and those wives understood and accepted that they would have no legal standing, then perhaps some of those problems could be avoided.

I think there are also some issues with child support/welfare benefits. I am not an expert in those matters, but I believe a group of polygamists in Arizona were prosecuted for welfare fraud, because the wives collected benefits as single mothers. Since their marriages were not legal, the "husband"'s income was not factored into their eligibility for various programs.

 

[FreshTressa]

As long as it is not me, I am fine with it.

I don't want to judge others lifestyle and it has been a system that has worked well many times in history.

If that is what they want to do, then go ahead.

It should not be allowed for underagers though.

 

[Aurora63]

I voted no...I don't understand how the women involved could really be happy sharing a husband. Probably gives him a nice feeling of power and control...which he has.