fromscratchmom
DIS Veteran
- Joined
- Oct 3, 2006
- Messages
- 580
Yes, the car advice is good. However it makes me think of my situation. I always buy a car intending to "drive it till it dies". Of course I can acknowledge that its dead if it begins to incur repair costs that are more than the expense of buying another. But then I've had quite a string of cars not lasting long making me jealous of those who pull this off... leaving me wishing for some windfall to make up the loss. Since wishing is not much of a financial plan... 
Hence my advice to "be happy". And I'll extend that by saying deal with what you have realistically. If a little dreaming and wishing is something you can do and enjoy and then move on to dealing with things realistically then by all means, dream away.
Just to explain my string of cars. My first car was a used car that was just a very bad purchase and never ran well for more than 2 or 3 days at a time. My second car was a Jetta and was awesome. It took a lot of abuse before it gave up the ghost. It was not a bad purchase but the young man I married was. After he had wrecked it numerous times it died. Luckily soon after that I realized that I had every right to be free of his srry cheating self. (another area of life to endeavor to be wise in, that will help you financially if you succeed.)
After that I drove a used hyundai that I can't remember what happened to it, but it didn't last long as old as it was. Then I bought another really small used car that was almost exactly like the hyundai but ran a lot better and seemed reliable for quite a while. Then I was rear-ended by someone who didn't see my brake lights, my blinker or my car at all, while I was mid way through a turn which rammed the car into a telephone pole at the corner and broke the seatbelt and threw me into the windshield. That was a lot of damage to that car and it doesn't take a lot to "total" a car as old as that one had been.
Next I bought a new ford escort wagon, at the same time as my DH bought himself a new ford contour. this was shortly before we got married, but we consulted each other before the purchases as we knew we would soon be combining our finances when we married the following march. His contour was such a lemon that we both have mistrusted the Ford company ever since, and having had that experience with them and their reaction to it, we will NEVER do fords again.
Sadly, although the escort was mostly serviceable, if not really a good car by any definition, I drove it for several years and really believed I should have been able to make it last for several more but was rear-ended in a highway pile up. I was in the middle of the string of cars of the pile up and the guy at the back that caused it must have really been flying when he came on the slowed traffic without really seeing it. That was crazy how big that was and just how little you could be looking out your front windshield to not see that the highway ahead was a parking lot.
Then we bought an van from Honda. DH was thrilled to finally coerce me into a mini-van. And although I never got completely comfortable driving and backing up in something that size and shape I intended to "drive it till it died". Well 4 years in, my son killed it for me. We were in an accident that was truly terrible last February. We rolled; we ended up hanging upside down. It was truly terrible. I tell you, that was the worst accident I can imagine and it gave me a lot of respect for honda given we could go through that much and the van could look like it did after and yet none of use were killed. Really, although the three of us who were in the van have been getting some chiropractic adjustments and I've been getting some massage therapy since then, the only serious injury was my DD(11) who cracked her growth plate an had to wear a non-weight bearing cast. But it healed up perfectly and faster than the ortho doc expected. We've been blessed and have been so thankful.
But ever since then I've been having to combat this OCD type thought that keeps popping in my head about my way of "driving a car till it dies" that is verra unpleasant, and not really rational given that I've never totalled a car through my own bad driving. Anyway,,, now I'm a very nervous driver and an even more nervous rider which I never was at all before this year. By the way, humor helps. There is a hysterical "women drivers compilation" on youtube that has the chipmunk song in the back ground. I laughed till I cried, nearly.
Luckily I talked DH into buying himself what he wanted for a new car and just letting me drive his old civic. I didn't want a new mini-van, we really weren't in a good position financially to get it and by the time DH had talked himself into moving on his purchase plan, Honda was having trouble supplying them because of the tsunami--so no deal being made of any kind. I looked at that as providential and got him to look at smaller cheaper things and then finally buy himself a pretty red outback. He's sort of wanted one the whole time we've been married.
Sooo... LONG story just to say. You have to deal with what life hands you, generally without worrying about placing blame.
If you have to do without a car for a few months, or get a smaller one or an older one... whatever it is. Be brutally honest with yourself about it and deal with what it really is.
By the way, Hubby LOVES his Outback and actually I really do too. It is great.
Hence my advice to "be happy". And I'll extend that by saying deal with what you have realistically. If a little dreaming and wishing is something you can do and enjoy and then move on to dealing with things realistically then by all means, dream away.
Just to explain my string of cars. My first car was a used car that was just a very bad purchase and never ran well for more than 2 or 3 days at a time. My second car was a Jetta and was awesome. It took a lot of abuse before it gave up the ghost. It was not a bad purchase but the young man I married was. After he had wrecked it numerous times it died. Luckily soon after that I realized that I had every right to be free of his srry cheating self. (another area of life to endeavor to be wise in, that will help you financially if you succeed.)
After that I drove a used hyundai that I can't remember what happened to it, but it didn't last long as old as it was. Then I bought another really small used car that was almost exactly like the hyundai but ran a lot better and seemed reliable for quite a while. Then I was rear-ended by someone who didn't see my brake lights, my blinker or my car at all, while I was mid way through a turn which rammed the car into a telephone pole at the corner and broke the seatbelt and threw me into the windshield. That was a lot of damage to that car and it doesn't take a lot to "total" a car as old as that one had been.
Next I bought a new ford escort wagon, at the same time as my DH bought himself a new ford contour. this was shortly before we got married, but we consulted each other before the purchases as we knew we would soon be combining our finances when we married the following march. His contour was such a lemon that we both have mistrusted the Ford company ever since, and having had that experience with them and their reaction to it, we will NEVER do fords again.
Sadly, although the escort was mostly serviceable, if not really a good car by any definition, I drove it for several years and really believed I should have been able to make it last for several more but was rear-ended in a highway pile up. I was in the middle of the string of cars of the pile up and the guy at the back that caused it must have really been flying when he came on the slowed traffic without really seeing it. That was crazy how big that was and just how little you could be looking out your front windshield to not see that the highway ahead was a parking lot.
Then we bought an van from Honda. DH was thrilled to finally coerce me into a mini-van. And although I never got completely comfortable driving and backing up in something that size and shape I intended to "drive it till it died". Well 4 years in, my son killed it for me. We were in an accident that was truly terrible last February. We rolled; we ended up hanging upside down. It was truly terrible. I tell you, that was the worst accident I can imagine and it gave me a lot of respect for honda given we could go through that much and the van could look like it did after and yet none of use were killed. Really, although the three of us who were in the van have been getting some chiropractic adjustments and I've been getting some massage therapy since then, the only serious injury was my DD(11) who cracked her growth plate an had to wear a non-weight bearing cast. But it healed up perfectly and faster than the ortho doc expected. We've been blessed and have been so thankful.
But ever since then I've been having to combat this OCD type thought that keeps popping in my head about my way of "driving a car till it dies" that is verra unpleasant, and not really rational given that I've never totalled a car through my own bad driving. Anyway,,, now I'm a very nervous driver and an even more nervous rider which I never was at all before this year. By the way, humor helps. There is a hysterical "women drivers compilation" on youtube that has the chipmunk song in the back ground. I laughed till I cried, nearly.
Luckily I talked DH into buying himself what he wanted for a new car and just letting me drive his old civic. I didn't want a new mini-van, we really weren't in a good position financially to get it and by the time DH had talked himself into moving on his purchase plan, Honda was having trouble supplying them because of the tsunami--so no deal being made of any kind. I looked at that as providential and got him to look at smaller cheaper things and then finally buy himself a pretty red outback. He's sort of wanted one the whole time we've been married.
Sooo... LONG story just to say. You have to deal with what life hands you, generally without worrying about placing blame.
If you have to do without a car for a few months, or get a smaller one or an older one... whatever it is. Be brutally honest with yourself about it and deal with what it really is.By the way, Hubby LOVES his Outback and actually I really do too. It is great.
