Please help me not feel guilty!!

[JUJU814]

So our mommy/daughter trip is in less than 2 weeks now. I can't believe it!! We are very excited.

This time, I did not make her any custom disney outfits or dresses. I have tons of ADRs planned, but now I am seeing the Creative Disigns invitations, mousekeeping envelopes, autograph pages etc.

I would LOVE to do all that..but oh my gosh, I haven't got the time. I've barely got the time to get ready for the trip like, oh, packing underwear!

She'll never know the difference..but I sure would like to be able to do all those special extras. I've booked us a very nice vacation. We're even staying CL! I've got GREAT ADRs..practically every character meal there is and a couple of nice ones for mom!

Why on earth do I feel "guilty"?? I'm getting away for 9 special nights with my sweet 6 year old. We have no plan. All we know is we're going to relax..go mini golfing (yeah, can you believe it???? she wants to though..) and be at least three days at Magic Kingdom.

I just want to hold her hand and snuggle and have fun, and now I'm here again, and wondering if I can do the envelopes and invitations and make a homemade autograph book and blah blah blah.

I'm crazy to feel guilty if I don't right? Somebody please tell me it's ok to just pack some shorts, capris and t shirts and just chill out and not do all the extras?? No doubt she'll get a new princess dress while we're there and we do have some cute outfits that still fit from the last trip.

I don't know why I do this to myself..this "do too much" syndrome. Before our last trip I was sewing up a storm with a 104 fever trying to finish dresses before going.

I'm so stressed out I could cry. I cannot wait for this trip. Sooo exhausted!! We just lost power for 4 days. We got it back Monday. I've had my son at Children's hospital twice in the last week for tests..one day he was under sedation, and he's going back for another next week. He has other appointments on top of that. He's ok, and we're so blessed..we really are, but it's just tiring. I know as moms we've just gotta suck it up, but still! It feels like I'm constantly telling my Emily "I'll be home later..mommy has to take brother to an appointment" She now wakes up and asks me if I have to go to an appointment today and who's going to pick her up from school. I do have a nanny/housekeeper that's been with us for 6 years that she knows and is comfortable with and usually picks her up, but that doesn't take the place of mom..ya know? (at least I sure hope not!)

There are so many amazingly awesome and creative ideas for Disney trips on the boards here..and I want to do them all! But it's just not realistic for me. That's ok right???

I'm done with the "poor me" for the night. Thanks for letting me blow off steam!

 

[buckler]

From one mom to another, give yourself a break! Don't do all of the crafty stuff and don't feel guilty. I do none of that and my kids have a great time and love Disney. They can't wait to go back because we have fun as a family. We don't even buy stuff in the parks because the kids would rather put the money towards another trip.

Now, go to Youtube and type in Model Day Magic Kingdom in the search box and watch the "Model Day at the Magic Kingdom" video and relax and look forward to some hand holding with your little one.

 

[llaxton]

The only thing she cares about it spending time with you - not what she is wearing.

 

[bumbershoot]

We just buy the autograph books there; I actually don't much like the looks of the ones made by people. I don't see the point of having the written name and picture of the character when they will be signing it. Just seems like overkill!

As for clothes; in the last few weeks before our DLR trip, I managed to find a few disigns to do really quick on t-shirts (and on a cheapie canvas bag for me, since I don't really "do" the matchy matchy stuff) for DH and DS. Didn't take too long, though I did hae to buy a cheapie iron for it, LOL.

Oh I know, if you REALLY want to do cutie things that don't cost much and probably won't take too long...find a few little pictures, print them on the transfer paper, and put them on the little one dollar canvas bags at Michaels, then carry those. Totally cute (at least I thought my Nightmare Before Christmas one was cute, and better than having Jack Skellington's head on my chest like DS and DH did!), inexpensive, almost no time consumed...and you feel like you've done just a teensy bit more, and can relax.

But really, you certainly don't have to do those things to have fun! That trip was the first time I've done such a thing, and while my guys enjoyed it, it wasn't a make or break thing with the trip.

 

[mrsmarilyn]

She will neither know or care that you aren't Martha Stewart or the Crafts Queen. All she will care is she gets 9 days alone with Mom having fun. Do NOT feel guilty. I never have time to do that stuff either--I run a business, I have an Autistic Son, and am now an only child (my only brother died 2 years ago this month) and my mother has Emphysema and Alzheimer's--she's been in the hospital or health center since the day after Christmas. I don't have time to blow my nose, forget making cutsie T-shirts. All I care about is getting OUT OF HERE and spending a week in Florida with my kids and my husband. We have our ADRs, and we're just going to explore the stuff we haven't seen before. (My kids would rather have a Pokemon t-shirt anyday anyway).

Just go, have fun, and don't worry that you are not a Crafts Over-Achiever! ;-)

 

[eyor44]

First off, breathe, in and out.

You are exactly as I was the past three trips. Week before we left each time, my dining room looked like a yardage store blew up in it. This last trip my second sewing machine died. and I was hand sewing on the way to Disney (we drive) to finish up dresses. Did she love them? Yes. Did she care that she wore customs, not really.

I think you have a great trip planned, I'm jeolous! Go, have fun and don't worry, you really don't have to do all of that. I have learned that lesson the hard way.

Why not let her pick out a couple shirts while you are there. Go to Tinkerbelle's Treasures for some really cute Princess ones.

Have a great time.

 

[PrincessInOz]

Relax. Take it easy. You're going to LOVE your trip with your daughter. And she will remember that Mum spent one-on-one time with her building LIFETIME MEMORIES. It sounds like you have heaps of ADRs planned and you're taking the clothes from the last time. PLUS you have already pointed out that she will get something new when you get there.....

Your time is better off making sure that your family are happy and healthy before the holiday.

 

[katied]

Don't worry about it. You and your daugher will have a wonderful time, more so than if you're overtired and stressed from trying to cram too much in right before the trip.

Before I had DS, I did all kinds of crafty things before trips with DNiece and DNephew (custom t-shirts, custom autograph books, custom journels, and then made them scrapbooks post-trip). Now that I have a kid of my own, and a second on the way, I don't know where I'd ever find the time. DS and new baby to come will just have to "survive" with certain store bought items, etc.

 

[DrMomof3]

Mommy guilt is a tremendous thing!

You are taking your child to the Happiest Place on Earth. That's amazing! Enjoy that fact and give yourself a break. Isn't it amazing how we can be our own worst enemies?

I have never made my children anything. I don't sew. I'm not very good at arts and crafts (I know how to print coloring pages off the internet, does that count???). I work full-time (I'm a surgeon so I can sew up people but can barely sew a button on a shirt!) so my kids are in after-school programs and day care. And it's OK!!!

The quality time you're about to spend with your child is FAR more important and memorable than any material item you could buy or make. And being able to give yourself permission to just enjoy the time is the most valuable gift you can give!

I have to work very hard on controlling my mommy-guilt because it's there all the time. I look at all the creative items and beautiful things here and I know that I'm just not capable of that. But I give my kids other things that come from my heart.

Amanda

 

[badblackpug]

I never do any of those things. Never. Last year we were in WDW for my son's 9th bday. I had some fleeting guilt over not planning a big event for him. I read so much on these boards about pirates cruises and such, but with 4 kids in a huge age range things like that are hard to plan, so our big celebration was a specialty cake at dinner. Do you know what the biggest thrill of his birthday was? The one he told EVERYONE about when they wished him a happy birthday? (he was wearing a birthday button) Waking up in the morning and finding a pair of personalized birthday ears, a Mickey t-shirt and a $15.99 Bakugan set on the end of his bed (none of it even wrapped, the Bakugan boght at Toys R Us and packed in my suitcase) that he assumed was a gift from WDW or maybe Mickey himself!

 

[disykat]

Ask yourself "how will my deprived child live through it?" Then roll your eyes at yourself and move on. You know you're being ridiculous. Take a few deep breaths and get ready to let go of the insanity. The best gift you can give your child is your relaxed presence!

 

[JUJU814]

Ask yourself "how will my deprived child live through it?" Then roll your eyes at yourself and move on. You know you're being ridiculous. Take a few deep breaths and get ready to let go of the insanity. The best gift you can give your child is your relaxed presence!

I love it! Thank you for that.

True..all very true!

 

[Renosiris]

I think just being able to take your kid to Disney should be enough of a reward for them. So many familes aren't able to do that, and have kids that desperately want to go.

Don't feel bad about not being able to provide every single detail. I'm sure you're a great mom without it.

 

[disykat]

I love it! Thank you for that.

True..all very true!

I'm glad you took it in the spirit is was intended. I often think of that old ad campaign for Calgon bubble bath. Sometimes we all get a little freaky and need a "Calgon take me away" moment or maybe a "someone slap me" moment to get ourselves out of it.

 

[kwitcherkicken99]

STOP! BREATHE!!!!

Now... you promised you were going to let the wind take you on this one. You can do it! Stay strong and just stick to you dinner ressies. Have you asked DD if she even wants to do autographs?? Don't worry about making any tops for the trip. Why don't you try to find something there for the two of you? A special lanyard or a t-shirt or a sweatshirt???

REPEAT AFTER ME! I will find my inner child! I will find my inner child!

You can do it!

 

[DrMomof3]

Ask yourself "how will my deprived child live through it?" Then roll your eyes at yourself and move on. You know you're being ridiculous. Take a few deep breaths and get ready to let go of the insanity. The best gift you can give your child is your relaxed presence!

Brilliant! Thanks for a reality check that we ALL need sometimes!!!

Amanda

 

[JUJU814]

STOP! BREATHE!!!!

Now... you promised you were going to let the wind take you on this one. You can do it! Stay strong and just stick to you dinner ressies. Have you asked DD if she even wants to do autographs?? Don't worry about making any tops for the trip. Why don't you try to find something there for the two of you? A special lanyard or a t-shirt or a sweatshirt???

REPEAT AFTER ME! I will find my inner child! I will find my inner child!

You can do it!

I will find my inner child. I will I will I will..I promise!!

Last night I was going NUTS! I was thinking "ok, I'm going to get her a few princess night gowns and have them laid out in her luggage for her..and...and...the lanyard, and the autograph book"

Then, I thought, you know what she LOVES to do? (unfortunately) SHOP!!! What can I say? She has an 18 year old sister. I'm not going to buy a single thing prior to the trip.

I even just walked past the Disney Store at the mall today! and it's a BIG one!

When we get there, we're going to go to Downtown Disney...because that's what SHE wants to do on the first night. We'll do a little shopping for our trip then..if she still would like to.

Can you believe that I just added a 10th night to this trip today? I've NEVER stayed for 10 nights. Dh said go for it, and darn it, I did before he had a chance to change his mind! He and my son are probably thrilled they won't have me to deal with for all that time!

Then, after reading the replies here, I dug into a drawer I had. It had TONS of the best Disney scrapbook stuff..papers, kits, stickers, elaborate fabric princesses, sticky disney bottlecaps, letters. I had bought it all LAST year to make all sorts of stuff and never did. It has been sitting in my drawer. Yesterday, I was on the phone with my best friend who also works for me. A few years ago, I took both our families to Disney. She is an avid scrapbooker and has just started working on the Disney pages. She has very little...so Emily and I boxed up all the Disney scrapbook stuff and mailed it to my friend for her and her girls to do their Disney crafts. I felt so good letting it go 1)my friend will use it..every last bit of it 2) It was sort of a way to tell myself "chill out..you'll never use this stuff..and that's ok!" Besides, I'm a digital girl!!! LOL

So, we're digging out our summer clothes and bathing suits and we're going to go with the flow. This should be a real challenge for me...but I know it'll be worth it!!

 

[kwitcherkicken99]

I will find my inner child. I will I will I will..I promise!!



Then, I thought, you know what she LOVES to do? (unfortunately) SHOP!!! What can I say? She has an 18 year old sister. I'm not going to buy a single thing prior to the trip.



I even just walked past the Disney Store at the mall today! and it's a BIG one!
(Even I wouldn't have had the power to do that!

When we get there, we're going to go to Downtown Disney...because that's what SHE wants to do on the first night. We'll do a little shopping for our trip then..if she still would like to.
See? There you go! You're off to a great start in your plans! And you said you were going commando!

Can you believe that I just added a 10th night to this trip today? I've NEVER stayed for 10 nights. Dh said go for it, and darn it, I did before he had a chance to change his mind! He and my son are probably thrilled they won't have me to deal with for all that time!
Lucky duck! What a great thing to add on to your trip. Now you can really go and just have at it! DH obviously sees that this is very important to you and wants to make sure you get the most out of your mommy and me time.

So, we're digging out our summer clothes and bathing suits and we're going to go with the flow. This should be a real challenge for me...but I know it'll be worth it!!
Couldn't have said it better myself!

 

[buckler]

I feel like we just had a Disney intervention.

Bad thing is it was staged by a bunch of Disney addicts.