personality change after gastric bypass

[njmom47]

Yes. It changes a person. That big of a change is going to effect your personality and give you a big confidence boost. some people have a positive outcome. I used to work with someone who had the surgery and she was awful to deal with post surgery. Ever read the donuts gate sue threads? There are usually issues that lead someone to eat themselves that big. Some people rush to get the surgery and do not deal with the issues, they lose the weight and get smacked with all the emotion. Donutgate sue ended up becoming an alcoholic and in rehab last I heard. I am not talking about everyone who has surgery, but some people eat their feelings.

Keep trying to reach out to her. She is experiencing her new life now. You need to try t be a part of it if you want to stay friends.

Donutgate Sue...I do remember that thread!
Anyway, one of my friends/coworkers had gb last summer. She obviously has not addressed the psychological issues that led her to overeat! She has changed in the way of "Oh, I really shouldn't eat that but I'm gonna anyway" and "I'm gonna eat that and be sick later, but I don't care" and she DOES eat alllll day!!! She goes around the office to the other "fat chicks" and tried to convince them to have the surgery. I think that should be a personal decision...right? She plays "Can you top this?" with EVERYTHING anyone says, and is generally loud and obnoxious.
My thinking is that she feels insignificant in her personal life, which led her to overeat, and now she has no comfort other than to talk about how the world treats her so unjustly (her parents, her kids, her boss, her "bestfriend" etc).
I should add she has had at least one surgery a year since I've known her (7 years)...what is wrong with her doctor? Maybe she's addicted to painkillers and that's why she has surgery so frequently.
To me, she's now just a sad skinny person instead of a sad fat person.
One of the others in our circle lost 40 lbs on her own but is now set to have the sleeve done due to health issues. SHE is a major psychological mess; let's see how THIS one goes!
(I am on the plus size side...just to clarify).

 

[Lila11]

I moved in with my best friend 4 years ago into the condo she had bought. At that time we were both heavy, me about 250, she 305. We were both the fat girls that used to do everything together. About a year a half later, she decided to get gastric bypass. She has since lost 150 pounds. I am still fat. She has changed considerably. I came home one day and she informed me that she was quitting her job. Now she is bringing all these men home and to her bed. On top of this, I put in 12.5 hour days and I am the one that does all the cleaning in the house. She does nothing but lay around on the couch. In fact, it is 2:45 PM and she is in her bed napping after having one of her men over last night. We don't do anything together anymore and I am hurt and angry over the way she is showing no consideration for me. I left a huge apartment to live in this tiny little room in her condo that I can barley move in. She makes these crazy choices without even discussing them with me. I feel like we aren't even friends any more, that we are just roommates. I remember saying to her before she had her surgery that we should talk about how it will change her, change me, change our relationship. Oh she doesn't see her self as going to change. Even when I try to talk about things now, she has all the answers, I can't move out of here fast enough. However, I am poor and can't afford to. I am miserable living with a person who is not the person I moved in with, not my friend and on top of it am still dealing with my own weight issues. I would never have this surgery, nor would I recommend it to anyone.

 

[kate_wdw]

I know I went through periods where I HATED anyone to tell me how great I looked and was very uncomfortable with people congratulating me. It made me feel like people thought that NOW I was worth something. Inside I felt like, Im the same person I was. Im still kind, sensitive, responsible, a good mother, a good friend. Why is the weight such a big deal?

This. I'm wouldn't discount the possibility that being treated differently by others post-surgery may have made her a bit wary and or suspicious of the people in her life.

 

[Dancind]

There's a lot of info out there now about the gut as the "2nd brain". Our gut controls a lot more in our body than just digestion.

I've been reading about this too, and I think there is a lot to it. Getting prepared for this surgery, going through it, probably lots of antibiotics after, is going to completely change the gut bacteria. Totally different gut bacteria, according to this research, means a different personality and different health issues.

I've been helping my DD with her leaky gut issues for a couple of years. She cut gluten, cut down sugar and simple carbs, and for a few months she has been adding more pre and probiotics. Her personality has really changed, and it's for the better. Anxiety and depression, mood swings, PMS, all gone. She lost weight too, but didn't need to lose a lot.

Her "before" is probably like a GBS person's "after". It's a gut/brain connection for sure.

 

[Burnedout]

I've known a half dozen friends and family who had the gastric sleeve done, all have lost most of the weight they needed to lose and all are the same general disposition. They are all local so maybe the ofc does a better than avg job at support. As well as the initial analysis of them for the surgery in general.

 

[family3indisney]

I had Gastric Bypass and Im not sure how you don't change. For years the extra weight was my "armor" then when its gone...its a big change and a big change in thinking. Its also (at least for me) was very difficult to deal with judgment about my decision, one day I was sitting at my desk at work and I overheard two other women talking about how great I looked but that it wasn't fair that insurance covered my surgery and would therefore drive up the cost for everyone else in the future. I also had family not understand, why I just didn't "hit the treadmill more". I did become a little upset and angry for some time, but I felt like I always had to defend my decision to others. I am very lucky that my surgeon required a lot of pre surgery work including seeing a psychiatrist. Then after surgery mandatory support group meetings. I think I have changed- but for the better. I would just be there for your friend he/she is going to have a lot of ups and downs and success will be contingent on the support they have around them... On a side note, I had a goal that if I lost the weight I sooo wanted to water ski, and a year after my surgery this girl got up on water skis whoooo hooo!

 

[lustergirl]

I've known a half dozen friends and family who had the gastric sleeve done, all have lost most of the weight they needed to lose and all are the same general disposition. They are all local so maybe the ofc does a better than avg job at support. As well as the initial analysis of them for the surgery in general.

My coworker's daughter had the sleeve done and was totally unprepared and ended up back in the hospital with a serious infection. After she went home she ate a whole turkey sausage sandwich. I was baffled because people should really research or I thought they were counseled before hand on what to expect. She wants to lose the weight but thinks she can do it quick and still eat the same things as before. Kind of sad.

 

[lustergirl]

One of my best friends had this surgery over a year ago. She was obese and is quite slender now and looks great although maybe older in the face. There has been an aloofness in her that I've noticed coming on for quite some time and now I am actually thinking she seems kinda like a different person, not responding to texts or messages, we used to be so connected. AT first I wasnt thinking much of it but now Im at the point of wondering if her surgery has changed her personality. I want to add I have always been a very supportive friend and when she was heavy we never talked about it and now that shes lost weight I always encourage her and tell her how good she looks. I'm thin so it was never that misery loves company thing. I know she is very into shopping now and new clothes and all that, stuff she was never really into before. Maybe she just doesnt have time for me now. I was wondering if anyone had experienced this, thanks!!!

Sorry but you seem to have an obsession with your friends' weight issues. This is your 2nd thread where you were "concerned" about someone who is over weight. Your other post you state that your overweight friend eats out to much. Maybe you should be more supportive. Maybe the friend you talk about on this post found out that you go on the internet and discuss your other friend's weight issues and wants nothing to do with you.

I would want a friend who is supportive and caring not discussing my issues with countless strangers. When you friend was overweight you didn't encourage her to lead a healthier lifestyle it is after she started losing weight that you encouraged her? Did I read your post right? That is completely shallow.

 

[Robinrs]

Sorry but you seem to have an obsession with your friends' weight issues. This is your 2nd thread where you were "concerned" about someone who is over weight. Your other post you state that your overweight friend eats out to much. Maybe you should be more supportive. Maybe the friend you talk about on this post found out that you go on the internet and discuss your other friend's weight issues and wants nothing to do with you.

I would want a friend who is supportive and caring not discussing my issues with countless strangers. When you friend was overweight you didn't encourage her to lead a healthier lifestyle it is after she started losing weight that you encouraged her? Did I read your post right? That is completely shallow.

I was about to say "wow ez, you and your overweight friends" when I realized THIS thread is a ZOMBIE!!

 

[lustergirl]

I was about to say "wow ez, you and your overweight friends" when I realized THIS thread is a ZOMBIE!!

Oh they got me too. OOOPS

 

[leebee]

Sorry but you seem to have an obsession with your friends' weight issues. This is your 2nd thread where you were "concerned" about someone who is over weight. Your other post you state that your overweight friend eats out to much. Maybe you should be more supportive. Maybe the friend you talk about on this post found out that you go on the internet and discuss your other friend's weight issues and wants nothing to do with you.

I would want a friend who is supportive and caring not discussing my issues with countless strangers. When you friend was overweight you didn't encourage her to lead a healthier lifestyle it is after she started losing weight that you encouraged her? Did I read your post right? That is completely shallow.

I noticed this, too, and wondered if maybe OP just has an issue (obsession?) with people who are overweight.

 

[lauradis]

I was about to say "wow ez, you and your overweight friends" when I realized THIS thread is a ZOMBIE!!

lol opps it says 2013 not 2014

 

[leebee]

Ooops, caught me too! However, there WERE six posts from today before we started commenting about OP's "obsession!" This probably was pulled up in conjunction with OP's current thread about overweight folks!

 

[Burnedout]

My coworker's daughter had the sleeve done and was totally unprepared and ended up back in the hospital with a serious infection. After she went home she ate a whole turkey sausage sandwich. I was baffled because people should really research or I thought they were counseled before hand on what to expect. She wants to lose the weight but thinks she can do it quick and still eat the same things as before. Kind of sad.

Oh how terrible! Insurance seems to require a psych eval and I know here they attended mandatory groups. Probably a good thing.

Why bring an old thread back as a first post? Weird.

 

[NewRVLady]

I moved in with my best friend 4 years ago into the condo she had bought. e.

So you created this username simply to bump up a zombie thread from this OP discussing weight?
Really?

 

[KristaTX]

So you created this username simply to bump up a zombie thread from this OP discussing weight?
Really?

Most likely in this instance the person did a Google search of the topic, this thread came up, and they understandably felt it was okay to post. I could be mistaken.

I've Googled lots of things and had non-Disney related Community Board threads come up among the first things on the list (even my own threads ). I've also Googled lots of things and had threads come up where my searched topic isn't specifically related to the whatever the overall topic for the that website is.

 

[low-key]

I've Googled lots of things and had non-Disney related Community Board threads come up among the first things on the list (even my own threads ). .

 

[KristaTX]

I'm actually glad this thread was bumped. I don't remember seeing it originally, but it is an interesting topic. Just based on the title and first post, I expected to see the OP slammed on here. But apparently lots of people have witnessed or experienced the same types of changes. I never really thought about the emotional/mental ramifications of this process.

 

[SMD]

I noticed this, too, and wondered if maybe OP just has an issue (obsession?) with people who are overweight.

I'm starting to think the answer is yes. Between this thread and the thread yesterday the OP has started at least 2 more threads about someone else's weight.

http://www.disboards.com/showpost.php?p=49981854&postcount=1
http://www.disboards.com/showpost.php?p=51121280&postcount=1

 

[Suger Mag]

I think the title of the other thread says a lot... "overweight people who constantly eat out". That is not just about her "friend" ... people is plural and includes all overweight ... and the constantly part is kinda snarky. Perhaps I read too much into things.... but when I read it, the tone of the title says to me: "fat people shouldn't eat out in public" (they should be more ashamed).

If her motivation is to sincerely help... I think she is going about it in the wrong way.