Parents, Stop Giving In To 'Picky Eaters'!

[robinb]

If my nephew comes at breakfast and doesn't want what we are having, he can have a snack, if he doesn't want that then he can wait until lunch, and so on and so on.
No food in my house is off limits, my kids can have what they want when they want. If they don't eat lunch and want 5 snacks instead that's fine, but I will NOT cook another meal, and I will NOT leave to buy food if they aren't happy with the choices in the house, and they have to TRY two bites.

Thanks for making that clear. It sounded like he had to eat what you offered him for dinner or he didn't eat anything at all.

 

[robinb]

And don't even think about flaming me because I don't have kids, I'm so over that.

Obviously not .

 

[monkeybug]

She didn't say that she ABUSES the kid. She's saying that she won't give in to his demands for unhealthy foods while he is in her home. As I said in my original post, 'Johnny's not going to STARVE'. Unless 'Johnny' has serious developmental/mental disabilities, he will eat what's given to him if he's hungry enough. And she is teaching her nephew a valuable lesson, both in nutrition and in life.

I encourage everyone to check out John Rosemond's columns on child rearing. A spoiled, overindulged child is an UNHAPPY and UNHEALTHY child and is more likely to stay that way into adulthood. And don't even think about flaming me because I don't have kids, I'm so over that.

This is soooo true!!!
Kids see love in the boundaries we set. They may not like them, they may complain and protest, but at the end of the day in a childs mind boundaries = Love!!!

 

[monkeybug]

Thanks for making that clear. It sounded like he had to eat what you offered him for dinner or he didn't eat anything at all.

No he just complains because at my house we don't have ramen, the chicken nuggets are home made (and therefore the wrong shape apparently), if you want chocolate milk you have to mix chocolate and milk together it's not in a giant gallon sized container and is not as thick as motor oil, and if we have meatballs they are likely made from turkey not beef, and all of the above are usually accompanied by some sort of veggie or fruit, and even though he doesn't have to eat it, he complains that it's even on his plate.
I'm not torturing the kid, I just refuse to buy him things I wouldn't buy for my own kids.

 

[cheermom1]

This is soooo true!!!
Kids see love in the boundaries we set. They may not like them, they may complain and protest, but at the end of the day in a childs mind boundaries = Love!!!

Exactly...the may not say it but they really want boundaries and rules they thrive when we are PARENTS and not friends!! WE as parents serve the food not them, they can't they are kids. They take a cue for us their parents in everything they do in life. They FOLLOW our lead!!! If we eat bad or let them eat bad then they will eat bad! If we eat good and make them eat good then they eat good. SEE the pattern?????

 

[Colleen27]

This sounds just right. Maybe, it's that we don't teach our kids to cook much any more that's the issue.

I have a friend who makes a very good point about that - Our kids generation is the first to (mostly) have parents AND grandparents who don't cook from scratch, so they're less involved in their meals/menus than previous generations.

 

[lillygator]

what do you feed your cats?

 

[robinb]

what do you feed your cats?

 

[luvmy3]

what do you feed your cats?

 

[Wenny]

My cat eats a far greater variety of food than DD.

I am apparently raising him better.

 

[Wishing on a star]

Hey, when he was a toddler, I actually put my son down every night with formula ***GASP!!!!*** because he had a bona-fide eating disorder/problem....

This child, literally, would not put anything in his mouth... NOTHING.... Nothing at all...

Today, he is 12 - and would eat us out of house and home!!!!!


OP, sorry, no snarkyness or disrespect...
But, until you've BTDT (with parenting, or anything else)
You night want to think twice about starting a thread with your negative opinions.

 

[hrh_disney_queen]

what do you feed your cats?

oh no, you di-ent go there!


I could have sworn I read a YAGE in this thread about 10 pages ago?

 

[scojos]

i agree that kids today have no "training" from there parents on how to cook. i teach food here in the UK. yes, kids have classes on how to cook, we do basics, cheese sauce from scratch, chopping prepping, mixing into a variety of dishes as well as desserts and snacks.
other than what they learn in class, which in my opinion is alot less than they should be taught, kids don not know what to do in the kitchen, as there mothers (and fathers) do not cook at home.
i have severe life threatening food allergies (sea food and pineapple) but i would never stop my kids from eating this stuff, and they eat very well.
ds 10 has autism, high functioning, and he loves food, 2 years ago he "developed" the same allergy as me at wdw as he said my food was better than the stuff he was being served (we had upgraded him to an adult!)
the chef came out to see us at lecellier and listen to josh ordering (steak, mushroom risotto and a side of asparagus, he was shocked that a kid that young would eat that stuff, he was even more shocked when he came out at the end of the meal and he had eatne it all!!
dont presume that all kids have a ltd diet.
tracy

 

[Missy1961]

I have a friend who makes a very good point about that - Our kids generation is the first to (mostly) have parents AND grandparents who don't cook from scratch, so they're less involved in their meals/menus than previous generations.

Not always true. My sister is a wonderful cook. Most nights they have a home cooked meal. She has 2 daughters, ages 11 & 7. The 11 yr old will try just about everything, likes tons of different things. Her 7 yr old will only try certain things. Same family, same upbringing, same meals--so who knows why one is picky when the other is not.

 

[si-am]

I feel bad for the OP here. I'm sorry, but the fact that you are moms doesn't mean you should make fun of those who aren't, JUST because they aren't. Especially since so many other moms seem to agree with her.

I never saw the OP being hurtful or mean or snarky. She even apologized.

 

[Colleen27]

I know that this is a common way to get kids to eat what they are served and that it works for a lot of families. However, you are essentially forcing the kid to eat or go hungry. Did you make him sit at the table the whole time too? Serve the same food for every meal until he ate it? Those are exactly the kind of on-going food battles I am talking about. For some kids it works in the short term but can lead to more serious issues in the future.

I agree that being that controlling/punitive about it can lead to issues but I didn't get that impression from what she was saying. I handle things pretty much the same in our house. No one has to sit at the table if they don't want to eat, other than for a short "catch up" time as a family at dinner. No one has to clean their plates, and I don't serve the same food over and over to force it on someone. And the fridge/pantry is never off limits. I don't have junk food on hand, though, so whether it is my kid, a neighbor, or a relative, if they sit down thinking they'll get a hot dog or chicken nuggets if they don't like a meal, they're going to be disappointed.

I won't babysit my nephew in part because of his eating issues. He pretty much only eats hot dogs, chicken nuggets, fries, certain crackers, and some fruit snacks. Oh, but he'll eat any candy you give him! He's a prime example of what the OP was talking about - on Easter my FIL made a HUGE meal, 4 meats, 7 veggies, 3 kinds of potatoes, veggie tray, salad, rolls, fruit salad, etc. Of a spread that could rival a Disney buffet in sheer size (and far surpass it in quality - FIL is the best cook I know), the only thing my nephew would eat was the Wheat Thins that were put out for the crab dip. Neither BIL or his ex cook and neither of them are willing to set some rules (not even ones as simple as "No dessert without eating some dinner"), but they wonder why he's so picky.

 

[Colleen27]

My cat eats a far greater variety of food than DD.

I am apparently raising him better.

Well, you have to... Our kids love us just for bringing them into the world, but you have to EARN a cat's love!

 

[mjkacmom]

Not always true. My sister is a wonderful cook. Most nights they have a home cooked meal. She has 2 daughters, ages 11 & 7. The 11 yr old will try just about everything, likes tons of different things. Her 7 yr old will only try certain things. Same family, same upbringing, same meals--so who knows why one is picky when the other is not.

Same here. I cook from scratch, we never have fast food, and I still have kids with limited foods that they will eat. Do they eat healthy? Yes! Being a picky eater does not mean the child eats junk - just less of a variety.

Let's say we're having turkey burgers. Two of my kids won't eat burgers, so give them something else if there aren't many other items on the menu. Since food had never been a battle, my kids have never dug their heels in, and are willing to keep trying new foods at they mature. Years ago, none of my kids would eat chicken except in nugget form - today, roasted chicken is a family favorite for all!

 

[popedisney]

I don't normally comment on these types of threads but I just couldn't help myself....I myself have a very picky 3 year old. He is recently begun to expand his eating choices and his father and I are extremely excited! I will admit that I have made him different choices for dinner but he is 3 and it is not a battle that I chose to fight....that being said....I believe parenting is a personal choice and no one should be criticizing anyone else's choices... I don't think the OP was criticizing anyone...however, I do think it is not fair to judge someone unless you have been in their shoes...and everyone's situation is different...I was a teacher before a SAHM and I can tell you that I often had "opinions" on how I thought parents should handle their children....I have changed my tune completely now that I have my own child! Parenting is a wonderful, difficult, roller coaster ride and I think we should help each other instead of judging....just my thoughts...

 

[Nik's Mom]

LOVE your avatar AND your signature pic. The Who are my second favorite group ever (Beatles are first). And the Daily Show is the best!
Sorry everyone for hijacking

Thanks!

scojos, that is so cool that they having cooking classes in the U.K. for kids. My ds starts middle school next year and I was told they will be teaching the class to cook. I think it is an important lesson.