Parents of the High School Class of 2017/College 2021

[sk!mom]

DD has a friend who had to decline the admission offer at her 1st choice school because very little merit aid was offered and the family couldn't afford the high cost of attending. She has paid a deposit at one of her backup choices, a very good school and very affordable after scholarship offers, but she's still pining away hoping she gets an offer from a waitlist school. I'm just shaking my head because clearly she's not going to get the big merit aid offers coming off the waitlist, if it even happens, and the waitlist school is the most expensive by far. I do feel bad for her because she has worked very hard to be top 10 in our large, competitive HS and I know she, and her parents, were hoping that would provide more opportunities than it has, but I think some of these kids just get so invested in the idea of certain schools it's hard to face the reality of what's financially feasible.

I see it happening with athletes as well. Another of DD's friends has been focused on volleyball to the exclusion of almost everything else for at least the past 4 years, probably longer. She played HS, she played club, her parents hired a recruiting firm, she went to more college showcases and summer camps than anyone I know. Deposits are now in at 2 schools, a D2 and a NAIA level. Both offered her a spot on the team and some money, but not even close to the big D1 full ride she, and her parents, were hoping for.

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Yes! to the bolded! Shooting for a reach or expensive choice with the hope of big merit money is fine but do it with eyes wide open and applications also in at schools that you can absolutely afford.

 

[AustinTink]

He just got into BERKELEY!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[laughinplace199]

He just got into BERKELEY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow - Congrats again! Was this his #1 choice?

 

[AustinTink]

Wow - Congrats again! Was this his #1 choice?

Yes, It was!!! He's so stressed out right now trying to decide because he has already done so much for UT. He has a roommate, orientation set up, etc. He's happy but very confused.

 

[laughinplace199]

He's lucky to have so many great choices! I hope he can make the decision without too much stress.

 

[robinb]

He just got into BERKELEY!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[robinb]

Sorry my last post was so BIG!

 

[AustinTink]

I AM SO EXCITED!!!!

 

[AustinTink]

He's lucky to have so many great choices! I hope he can make the decision without too much stress.

Yes, he really is so lucky. It has been a long, weird road to get here with several upsets along the way.

 

[cats mom]

We knew that "investing" in my DD's swim career was a poor investment. We did it because she liked swimming and competing and we liked to watch her swim. Good thing too since she decided that she didn't want to swim in college. I shudder to think about the thousands (and thousands and thousands) of dollars we spent over the last 13 years on club swim, swim meets, travel meets and $300 tech suits.

You never know why your friend chose the schools they did. I know someone whose DD will be playing softball for a D3 school because she would get to play immediately. They came up with some "merit" money for her since they can't pay for athletic scholarships. Playing everyday more important to them than accepting the offer at the D1 school where she would warm the bench her first season. You said they have deposits down at two schools? How can they do that? Wasn't it just athletic signing day last week? I thought that they have to commit to one school by that time. Or is it because the other school is in the NAIA? In any case, I think it's crappy to say "yes" to two schools and have them count on your athlete being on their team.

I'm right there with you when it comes to money spent on sports over the years. We've always understood all that money fell under the disposable income category of our budget rather than the investment category, and I guarantee I've sat down and figured out where else it could be going more than once. For the most part I don't regret it though, and for reasons similar to yours. Our kids enjoyed the experience, we enjoyed supporting them, and we all learned some valuable life lessons.

The point I was trying to make is that just like "Getting Accepted does NOT mean that a Merit Scholarship will be forthcoming...." Making a college team does NOT mean that an athletic scholarship will be forthcoming.

We've known many parents who felt all the money they were spending on club sports, private coaching, recruiting services, etc. was an investment that would pay off when full ride athletic scholarships started rolling in. That has happened for a few, but not nearly as many as had hoped it would.

As for DD's friend, both programs are aware that she hasn't made a decision, and both spots are still available to her... for now. I doubt that continues to be the case for long. In fact one of the coaches made sure to point out that the lack of official commitment goes both ways.

National signing day is just the 1st day a letter of intent can be entered into (for those who didn't sign during the early period in Nov) it certainly isn't the only day or the last day. For volleyball the regular signing period goes from 4/12 to 8/1.

Edited to add Nov signing dates since someone asked about that via PM.

 

[v.t.]

All the stadium events, prom and project celebration (after party) are over! Everything went well so I feel like we are in the home stretch. DS2 surgery was Monday and we are still in the hospital. The surgery was a little more involved than they thought and recovery has been quite slow, if everything goes well we might be discharged on Monday. So I have had time to read and catch up with everyone. Congrats to those who getting those last minute acceptance, but hugs to the parents with all the stress it brings. And hugs to those who did not receive the news they were hoping for.
I need to be working on graduation announcements but haven't received the proofs from the photographer yet. No party, so all we have left are the different banquets and programs. DS2 is on home bound for the rest of the year so we have to be careful which and how many events he attends. He will get to speak at all of them since he is a class officer which makes it even harder. But we may not have to worry about that either since the secretary who sets the programs has decided one girl deserves to be front and center, even though she has only been an officer one year. The three boys, including my 2 DS have been officers the whole time and are student body officers, get minor roles. The boys say they don't care and I can normally let this stuff go, but it is really bothering me. I am going to talk to the other boy's mom, maybe we can approach the situation together or should I just let it go?

 

[aprilgail]

Commitment day at school was May 1st- All the kids wear the shirts of whatever college they committed to that day- My daughter found another kid that is going to Northeastern from her school. She took one AP test last week and has another coming up on Monday- of course she just woke up with a 101.3 fever.

 

[robinb]

The point I was trying to make is that just like "Getting Accepted does NOT mean that a Merit Scholarship will be forthcoming...." Making a college team does NOT mean that an athletic scholarship will be forthcoming.

We've known many parents who felt all the money they were spending on club sports, private coaching, recruiting services, etc. was an investment that would pay off when full ride athletic scholarships started rolling in. That has happened for a few, but not nearly as many as had hoped it would.

Yup. I have *another* friend whose DD will swim for a D2 college next year. She swam for most expensive and elite local club team, they paid for extra coaching through high school so she could make the state meet (she made it on a relay) also also paid for recruiting. She was offered some money at some colleges but he was really hoping that she would get a LOT more. She ended up at a place that offered her no money her first year but (like the other kid) gets to swim every meet and she loves the team.

As for DD's friend, both programs are aware that she hasn't made a decision, and both spots are still available to her... for now. I doubt that continues to be the case for long. In fact one of the coaches made sure to point out that the lack of official commitment goes both ways.

National signing day is just the 1st day a letter of intent can be entered into, certainly not the only day or the last day. For volleyball the signing period goes from 4/12 to 8/1.

You're right. I was having a brain cloud. Swimmers can still sign too. My DD is still be recruited by coaches ... the most recent email came from a D2 school yesterday. I hope your friend's DD will have her decision soon and not leave those coaches hanging.

All the stadium events, prom and project celebration (after party) are over! Everything went well so I feel like we are in the home stretch. DS2 surgery was Monday and we are still in the hospital. The surgery was a little more involved than they thought and recovery has been quite slow, if everything goes well we might be discharged on Monday. So I have had time to read and catch up with everyone. Congrats to those who getting those last minute acceptance, but hugs to the parents with all the stress it brings. And hugs to those who did not receive the news they were hoping for.
I need to be working on graduation announcements but haven't received the proofs from the photographer yet. No party, so all we have left are the different banquets and programs.

I can't remember, what surgery did your DS2 have?

DS2 is on home bound for the rest of the year so we have to be careful which and how many events he attends. He will get to speak at all of them since he is a class officer which makes it even harder. But we may not have to worry about that either since the secretary who sets the programs has decided one girl deserves to be front and center, even though she has only been an officer one year. The three boys, including my 2 DS have been officers the whole time and are student body officers, get minor roles. The boys say they don't care and I can normally let this stuff go, but it is really bothering me. I am going to talk to the other boy's mom, maybe we can approach the situation together or should I just let it go?

It would bother me too that a girl who is a newbie to being an officer would be featured while my kid had dedicated himself throughout high school was not. It's not fair. That being said, I would let it go. It's really about your sons and it's up to them to stand up for themselves. Since they appear to be bothered by it (or won't admit it), I would just sit back and grumble a little to myself.

 

[yeahdisney]

Received our first email for payment due for room and board; pay by June 1.
It begins.

Austintink. Congratulations.

 

[robinb]

Commitment day at school was May 1st- All the kids wear the shirts of whatever college they committed to that day- My daughter found another kid that is going to Northeastern from her school. She took one AP test last week and has another coming up on Monday- of course she just woke up with a 101.3 fever.

Oh no! I hope she feels better for tomorrow.

 

[AustinTink]

Austintink. Congratulations.

Thank you!!!

 

[SmallWorld71]

Well, DS has a date for the prom. He asked a friend at the drama awards Friday night. She and her boyfriend recently broke up so she was in the same situation as him. I think they are both relieved. They have many friends in common and her sister's date (she is a twin) is a good friend of DS.

 

[v.t.]

My DS just got into UCLA!!!!

He just got into BERKELEY!!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh My Goodness!!!!!! So exciting.

What are y'all going to do?

 

[AustinTink]

Oh My Goodness!!!!!! So exciting.

What are y'all going to do?

Talk about stressful, but an amazing kind of stress. We are headed to LA very soon. I think he might be leaning that way.

 

[wannabee]

Has anyone started shopping for dorms yet? I bought a couple of sets of twin XL sheets on clearance last year but that's all I have. DS doesn't care about matching or anything like that. I want to buy a mattress topper but other than that not really sure what he will need.