Parents of strong willed children support group

[Gabes_mommy]

I can't possibly be the only one with a stubborn, strong willed child. Would any other parents be interested in sharing experiences together, giving and getting non-judgmental advice, and venting?

My DS is almost 3 (12/5) and he is already a very challenging child. I guess I shouldn't be surprised due to the fact that both DH and I are very strong-willed. My mother claims that my DS doesn't even come close to being as challenging as I was at his age.

I hope other people join.

 

[CathrynRose]

3???

I have a strong willed 18 y/o. I can tell you - it's just been loads of fun.

 

[paintnolish]

Me, me! DD is 8 going on 16. She really makes it difficult sometimes. She is very stubborn and bossy. Lots of fights ensue between her and her brother because she likes to "help" him- do things that he is trying to do!

 

[my3sonsagn]

Count me in! My DS15 has given us attitude here and there, but is mostly easy going. My DS10 - oh, my GOODNESS - I thought there could never be a child as stubborn and difficult as him... right up until DS3 was about 2.5 when we realized he could out-stubborn all of us! We have the hardest time disciplining both of them because, to them, NO punishment that we have tried thus far (and we've tried a heck of a lot) is worse than doing/not doing whatever it was they got into trouble for. Ugh - I love them to pieces, and I know their personalities will serve them well as adults; I'm just afraid we'll never make it that far alive. lol

 

[nmmom95]

I'm in! My DS6 is an incredibly sweet and affectionate child, as long as he's doing exactly what he wants. He's not bratty, he just honestly believes that he knows more than us. He's also very bossy, which drives his older brother crazy. I love him to pieces, but he is a handful!

 

[MarieFan]

With Brynne, we thought we were getting it all right, that we were really good parents. Then came SeiJin. It turns out we just had a really good kid.

 

[puffkin]

I'm in! My DS6 is an incredibly sweet and affectionate child, as long as he's doing exactly what he wants. He's not bratty, he just honestly believes that he knows more than us. He's also very bossy, which drives his older brother crazy. I love him to pieces, but he is a handful!

You just described DS3 exactly. He is also ridiculously smart and never forgets ANYTHING. He really keeps us on our toes, I can't imagine what it will be like when he is a teen!

 

[Amg120499]

Oh count me in! My dd(7) can be so sweet when she wants to be and so NOT as well! She suffers from "only child syndrom", add to the fact that her father and I are getting divorced and there is no end to the fun.

Someone please tell me it will get better

 

[KimR]

Maybe you all should try parenting your children instead of complaining about it on a discussion board.













KIDDING!!! sorry, but in light of some recent threads, I just couldn't resist. I'm normally very good, but honestly, sometimes you just gotta stir up some trouble.

 

[wdwfan16]

My advice - Do not get in line at the Ikea. Beware of old ladies.

 

[clovergirl5]

Hi there. Terrible 2's and a dd6 who doesn't want to do what she's told and is by far the most stubborn outta the 5. But I love her blown kisses before she gets on the bus in the morning

 

[clovergirl5]

My advice - Do not get in line at the Ikea. Beware of old ladies.

That seems to be the best sentiment of the season, at least in recent experience

 

[clovergirl5]

Oh count me in! My dd(7) can be so sweet when she wants to be and so NOT as well! She suffers from "only child syndrom", add to the fact that her father and I are getting divorced and there is no end to the fun.

Someone please tell me it will get better

It'll get better. Divorce is hard on dc, coming from divorced parents when I was 16. Love her and love her and hug her and hug her and let her know its gonna be ok. It will eventually get better. Huge hugs to you and her. I know its a hard time.

 

[MarieFan]

Maybe you all should try parenting your children instead of complaining about it on a discussion board.













KIDDING!!! sorry, but in light of some recent threads, I just couldn't resist. I'm normally very good, but honestly, sometimes you just gotta stir up some trouble.

Oh my gosh! I didn't see the kidding part right away! Whew! I was composing my answer in my head and deciding whether I should post it or run away!

 

[erincon23]

My DS 14 is a very strong-willed child. Punishments do not work with this kid. The only thing that moderates his behavior is a reward system -- we give him points for doing things and take them away for poor behavior, and then he can turn the points into something he wants. I must say that I believe we give in to him too much, and I am concerned about his future -- this is the fourth year that's he's missed way too much school (undiagnosed major anxiety until last year, lots of treatment... and this year, a back injury has kept him home) and he has become VERY stubborn. He took his high school entrance tests yesterday (a month later than most of the other 8th graders because of the back injury) and REFUSED to take the test for entrance into honors English classes (as it turned out, they didn't offer that test yesterday anyway, they'll go by teacher recs). He has caused much gnashing of teeth and sleepless nights, tears and frustration. But he can be the most loving and sweet kid around when he isn't trying to get his own way.

Try a book called "The Strong-Willed Child." I think some of it may be appropriate for some families -- we got some ideas out of it.

I don't know if it gets any better! I can only hope that this stubborness translates into him working hard toward what he wants in life.

Erin

 

[glitterkittyy]

Avoid Wal-mart, Ikea, McDonalds.

If that doesn't work, getting a switch seems to work well.

 

[Gabes_mommy]

Welcome everyone!

Should we do some general intro stuff? My name is Joy and my DS, Gabe, is currently an only child. I would love to have another, but I have a history of miscarriages so it may not happen. I work F/T at a community college as a professor and in the library. My dad takes care of DS when I work which is great because my dad is really strict and is helping a lot with DS's behavior.

It sounds like strong willed kids have a lot in common. They can be extremely sweet as long as things are going their way. My DS is positively delightful most of the time (sweet, charming) but just hold on tight if he is not happy. It is very common for him to scream at me, "no mommy".

We are being really strict with him. We stopped giving him warnings and now we punish him immediately (a time out usually) when he has one of his little fits. The time outs are really working....for now. He usually comes out happy and ready to behave again.

How did you all get through the young child years?

 

[ckay87]

Avoid Wal-mart, Ikea, McDonalds.

If that doesn't work, getting a switch seems to work well.

Love it!

 

[paintnolish]

KimR- My eyes about bulged out of my head! I was thinking, "Oh no, she didn't".
99% of the time, if you saw or heard dd, you'd think she was the sweetest- good manners to strangers, etc. Then again, if you heard that annoyed sigh or complaining she does when I tell her "no" she might be her own thread on the CB!

 

[ogreenlee]

I have no idea what any of y'all are talking about...

Must suck for y'all...




(kidding for those who aren't in the know... it all group)