Parents of College Class of 2018 (A.K.A., "Is this the line to the poor house?")

[Gina]

Congratulations on your daughter's college acceptance!

We ended up touring Texas A & M and my son loves it. He is interested in their cadet program. He wants to major in engineering, but also become an officer in the army. So it looks like it's Texas A & M for him. We looked online and although his transcripts were mailed, the school hasn't listed them as posted yet. My son is flying back to Texas to attend their night with a cadet program. Once he does that, he can apply for the cadet scholarships. He's already applied for the ROTC and we are waiting to hear from them.

It will be nice to have the big decisions made early in the year.

He has already applied and been accepted to A&M and into the Engineering program, correct? Just going to apply for the Corp later?

 

[camreesmom]

Congratulations on your daughter's college acceptance!

We ended up touring Texas A & M and my son loves it. He is interested in their cadet program. He wants to major in engineering, but also become an officer in the army. So it looks like it's Texas A & M for him. We looked online and although his transcripts were mailed, the school hasn't listed them as posted yet. My son is flying back to Texas to attend their night with a cadet program. Once he does that, he can apply for the cadet scholarships. He's already applied for the ROTC and we are waiting to hear from them.

It will be nice to have the big decisions made early in the year.

I went to A&M myself and that is also our daughter's first choice so I always love to hear about kids wanting to go there It's a great school. The Corps is really a good program, too. Our freshman daughter wants to be in the Band at A&M and the only way you can do that is to be in the Corps. I was shocked when she said that she wanted to do that! Will your son get to go to a football game when he gets to spend the night?

 

[GaSleepingBeautyFan]

Still struggling to get DD to even do anything in regards to college planning. She's still insisting that she WILL go out of state, but no clue as to where, and she won't look at a single piece of college mail or website. It's now October and we haven't done a single campus visit. I finally told her that I was going to pick a college for us to visit and I was going to drag her there if I had to physically carry her on the tour. So on Saturday we are going to visit a state college that is about 30 minutes from home, somewhere I would be happy to have her go and I could afford to send her. I've got my fingers crossed that she will like it or that if she doesn't , it will get her to stop sticking her head in the sand over all this. I've been so incredibly frustrated by her whole attitude lately. Senior year has been no fun so far.

She did take the SAT again last Saturday, and she did get her senior pictures taken last week.

I feel your pain. My DS took the SAT again last Saturday too. But he hasn't been pro-active regarding college visits.

I dragged him to the High School College Fair and he found 3 colleges he said he's interested in. One of them is having an open house this week but despite my asking him, he hasn't put his name on the list.
I'm extremely fed up with him at this point.

We have already had a "wake up and smell the roses" talk last week about his grades and now it looks like I'll be doing the same thing regarding college stuff.

I remember how excited I was about High School Graduation and disappointed that I couldn't afford to go to college and had to go to a trade school instead.

I just don't get my sons procrastination at all. At his age I would have jumped at the chance to be visiting colleges.

 

[mommykds]

Still struggling to get DD to even do anything in regards to college planning. She's still insisting that she WILL go out of state, but no clue as to where, and she won't look at a single piece of college mail or website. It's now October and we haven't done a single campus visit. I finally told her that I was going to pick a college for us to visit and I was going to drag her there if I had to physically carry her on the tour. So on Saturday we are going to visit a state college that is about 30 minutes from home, somewhere I would be happy to have her go and I could afford to send her. I've got my fingers crossed that she will like it or that if she doesn't , it will get her to stop sticking her head in the sand over all this. I've been so incredibly frustrated by her whole attitude lately. Senior year has been no fun so far.

She did take the SAT again last Saturday, and she did get her senior pictures taken last week.

You are not alone!

My DD applied to 1 school so far which is a backup. They did not require an essay so it was filed out & sent. The other 3 schools she is looking at (one of which is her top choice) all require multiple essays. The early action deadline is October 15...and has she done her essays yet? Um..no! She is quite a procrastinator! I was hoping she would at least apply early to her first choice school because they send out notice on December 15. I am a planner so knowing our options early would be great..however she is not bothered. Hmmpph.

She did take her 2nd SAT last Saturday so there's something!

 

[Bluestars]

He has already applied and been accepted to A&M and into the Engineering program, correct? Just going to apply for the Corp later?

He applied to the school, but they are waiting on his transcripts. His high school already sent them, so I guess it takes awhile to get posted. While he was there, he interviewed with the Professor of Military Science, which was a requirement for applying for the ROTC scholarship. He suggested that my son go to the Night-with-a-cadet program. My son is flying out tomorrow to attend it. After he attends that and gets accepted to the school, he can apply for the cadet scholarships. I think that's how it works. I guess we will see. This is all new to me.

 

[Bluestars]

I went to A&M myself and that is also our daughter's first choice so I always love to hear about kids wanting to go there It's a great school. The Corps is really a good program, too. Our freshman daughter wants to be in the Band at A&M and the only way you can do that is to be in the Corps. I was shocked when she said that she wanted to do that! Will your son get to go to a football game when he gets to spend the night?

That's good to hear that you think it's a great school. We were very impressed after going on the tour. They offer some great programs and their cadet program seems wonderful. Is your daughter a freshman there now? Will she join the Corps next year? My son is flying out tomorrow and returning on Friday, so unfortunately he won't be there for the game.

 

[IDoDis]

I think each plan offers at least some dining dollars.

Many to choose from!!

Weekly Meal Plans


19 meals/wk
with $100 Dragon Dollars
$1325


14 meals/wk
with $200
Dragon Dollars
$1289


10 meals/wk
with $250
Dragon Dollars
$1260


PLUS 19 meals with $225
Dragon Dollars
$1425


PLUS 14 meals with $325
Dragon Dollars
$1389


PLUS 10 meals with $375
Dragon Dollars
$1360


Semester Block Meal Plans
Any 200 meals with $150 Dragon Dollars $1200


Any 120 meals with $250 Dragon Dollars $1200


Dragon 50 Plan with $200 Dragon Dollars $600


Dragon 50 Plan with $300 Dragon Dollars $700


Dragon 50 Plan with $500 Dragon Dollars $900

Wow, I wish we had those prices! Here are the prices we are looking at. Actually these are the prices for 2013-2014, so they will be higher next year:

Meal Plan 1 - Unlimited La Posada Meals & $50.00 dining points (limited to 6 swipes/day) $1,800.00/payment
Meal Plan 2 - 205 La Posada Meals & $150.00 dining points avg. 12 meals/wk $1,700.00/payment
Meal Plan 3 - 150 La Posada Meals & $350.00 dining points avg. 9 meal/wk $1,600.00/payment
Meal Plan 4 - 90 La Posada Meals & $350.00 dining points avg. 6 meal/wk $1,045.00/payment
Meal Plan 5 - Dining Points Only - purchased in $100 increments w/$100 minimum $ 100 - $600/payment
Meal Plan 6 - 40 La Posada Meals & $125.00 dining points avg. 3 meal/wk $ 500.00/payment
Meal Plan 7 - 20 La Posada Meals & $125.00 dining points avg. 1 meal/wk $ 300.00/payment
La Posada Gold Plan - 75 La Posada Meals $ 682.00/year
La Posada Silver Plan - 50 La Posada Meals $ 456.00/year
La Posada Bronze Plan - 25 La Posada Meals $ 242.00/year

DD's 9 meal a week plan is $550 more than your 10 meal a week plan!

 

[elgerber]

DD's 9 meal a week plan is $550 more than your 10 meal a week plan!

Wow, that's crazy!!!! Maybe the food is that much better ? Trying to help you out here.

I am back to whining again. I am so bugged by this Yale conversation that she had with her counselor. I was trying to get some info out of her last night, and she said she is "afraid she is settling" for the state school. The day before this conversation she was super excited to get the housing/dining application in the mail. I am tempted to let her apply to Yale, knowing chances are slim to none, no matter what her GPA and ACT scores, just so she will have tried.
I too, felt maybe she was settling at first, but when I sat down and really thought about it, I felt good about it. This school is very affordable. And for someone majoring in Film and English it scares the crap out of me to think of her coming out of school with $60-$80k in loans, which is probably what would happen if she went to an out of state school. Many of the schools I have looked at with film programs are $40-$50k per year, even with scholarships, there is a BIG chunk left on the table to pay. If she were going to med school or engineering or something, then maybe the loans wouldn't be such a fear for me, but they are.
I am just so sad after hearing her say that last night. I'm hoping when we go back up to the school next week, her excitement will return.
OMG, she was even telling me about the "dorms" at Yale. UGH. Thanks for listening to me whine!!! Again!

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Wow, that's crazy!!!! Maybe the food is that much better ? Trying to help you out here.

I am back to whining again. I am so bugged by this Yale conversation that she had with her counselor. I was trying to get some info out of her last night, and she said she is "afraid she is settling" for the state school. The day before this conversation she was super excited to get the housing/dining application in the mail. I am tempted to let her apply to Yale, knowing chances are slim to none, no matter what her GPA and ACT scores, just so she will have tried.
I too, felt maybe she was settling at first, but when I sat down and really thought about it, I felt good about it. This school is very affordable. And for someone majoring in Film and English it scares the crap out of me to think of her coming out of school with $60-$80k in loans, which is probably what would happen if she went to an out of state school. Many of the schools I have looked at with film programs are $40-$50k per year, even with scholarships, there is a BIG chunk left on the table to pay. If she were going to med school or engineering or something, then maybe the loans wouldn't be such a fear for me, but they are.
I am just so sad after hearing her say that last night. I'm hoping when we go back up to the school next week, her excitement will return.
OMG, she was even telling me about the "dorms" at Yale. UGH. Thanks for listening to me whine!!! Again!

If it helps at all, I'm having similar conversations with my DD, although about schools that are nowhere near the level or cost of Yale. She still has Coastal Carolina in the back of her head. We went ahead and submitted an app last night and I'm sure she'll get in. The problem is she's already been accepted to Stockton and with her scholarship it should run about $18k a year. If she goes to Coastal it's about $30k a year. And while Coastal has beautiful weather, beaches and a color guard/marching band, is it really worth spending a minimum of $12k more every year? And being 10-11 hrs away from home as opposed to 2, if she wants to visit? Because I told her, we certainly wouldn't be paying for her to fly home every holiday break. If it weren't for the money I would let her go to Coastal in a heartbeat. And being an only, this is probably the first time in her life I'm not buying her something to make her happy/makeup for other shortcomings in her life. I won't do it. In all honesty, we only have one year's worth of tuition saved and the rest will be her student loans ($5500, $6500, $7500, $7500) and the rest is on me. I'll probably be taking loans from my 401k to pay for college. I've also read on College Confidential (yeah, I know ) that many kids aren't able to get further loans. They have no credit, no job, etc. There seems to be a real pullback on giving college students loans. So even if your child got into Yale and wanted to go into debt, chances are she might not get the loans to pay for it, above what you are willing to contribute.

My biggest fear was always that my DD would be smart enough to get into an Ivy and I wouldn't be able to afford it. It's hard to think logically when you want to give them the world. In my case DD could get into more prestigious schools but we couldn't afford it. And thankfully she doesn't want that kind of pressure. She wants to be able to learn but also have enough of a social life where she can have fun while earning her degree.

You have a tough road ahead of you. I think you should sit her down and tell her that you are willing to pay "x" amount and that is it. If she wants it bad enough she'll have to find a way to put more skin in the game. That's what I told DD. I'm extending myself much too far already to let her (or me) guilt me into anything further. We can only do what we can do. And somehow our children will be just fine.

 

[elgerber]

And being 10-11 hrs away from home as opposed to 2, if she wants to visit?

Thank you very much!! It just helps to get it out there and bounce it off of other people.
And the distance thing, I haven't even gotten into that. Going from being 200 miles away to 1350 miles away!
I just don't get why her counselor put it into her head that she could "get into out of state schools too". Of course she could but why does that make them better just because they are out of state??

 

[SydSim]

Thank you very much!! It just helps to get it out there and bounce it off of other people.
And the distance thing, I haven't even gotten into that. Going from being 200 miles away to 1350 miles away!
I just don't get why her counselor put it into her head that she could "get into out of state schools too". Of course she could but why does that make them better just because they are out of state??

I certainly can understand the frustration with the counselor's comments, but I can also understand the motivation behind them.

My DDs school's graduates primarily go to two year schools or in-state four year colleges. After they finish, many will stay in the area, hang with the same people and raise their families here. Life can certainly be great, but wouldn't it be fascinating to see what else is out there! Going to school out of state opens the child up to not only a different living area, but also different people.

The counselor may think that your child may benefit more from expanding her horizons (not every kid can handle it, but the counselor may feel that your child would). But I know, it sucks that this idea comes after it seemed as if everything was settled about college for her.

I wish that my SILs kids would have ventured out a little more. They could thrive a lot more if they were able to leave this area. I am all for my DD going out of state, if that's what she wants and the school is a good fit for her. It's great that many schools have financial incentives to help lure kids from different geographical areas. And I really like the colleges that give discounted tuition to some of their neighboring states.

 

[camreesmom]

That's good to hear that you think it's a great school. We were very impressed after going on the tour. They offer some great programs and their cadet program seems wonderful. Is your daughter a freshman there now? Will she join the Corps next year? My son is flying out tomorrow and returning on Friday, so unfortunately he won't be there for the game.

No, we have a freshman & a senior but both are just in high school. A&M is our senior's (DD17) first choice (Baylor which costs twice as much is her 2nd choice). Our freshman (DD14) is already set on A&M and is determined to make it happen....lol.

They probably told you this when you visited but A&M is #1 in the state and #8 in the nation as far as employer recruitment.

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Thank you very much!! It just helps to get it out there and bounce it off of other people.
And the distance thing, I haven't even gotten into that. Going from being 200 miles away to 1350 miles away!
I just don't get why her counselor put it into her head that she could "get into out of state schools too". Of course she could but why does that make them better just because they are out of state??

FWIW, my DD's GC gave them a little quiz freshman year (when DD was in all honors classes) and basically told her the results said she would amount to nothing. She didn't have the aptitude for much beyond maybe working as a clerk in a store or something equally ego bruising. I told my DD to let it go and ignore her. Not to let anyone else dictate what you are capable of. I find my DD's GC to be more of a hinderance than a help. She's been barking at them to get their apps started, then when we need something from her for the app she's too busy and doesn't know when she'll get to it.

I understand why she was pushing your DD outside her comfort zone, but without knowing a family's situation (financial and otherwise), she shouldn't have made your daughter feel like her first choice was insignificant and subpar.

 

[elgerber]

I certainly can understand the frustration with the counselor's comments, but I can also understand the motivation behind them.

My DDs school's graduates primarily go to two year schools or in-state four year colleges. After they finish, many will stay in the area, hang with the same people and raise their families here. Life can certainly be great, but wouldn't it be fascinating to see what else is out there! Going to school out of state opens the child up to not only a different living area, but also different people.

The counselor may think that your child may benefit more from expanding her horizons (not every kid can handle it, but the counselor may feel that your child would). But I know, it sucks that this idea comes after it seemed as if everything was settled about college for her.

I wish that my SILs kids would have ventured out a little more. They could thrive a lot more if they were able to leave this area. I am all for my DD going out of state, if that's what she wants and the school is a good fit for her. It's great that many schools have financial incentives to help lure kids from different geographical areas. And I really like the colleges that give discounted tuition to some of their neighboring states.

I actually just got off the phone with the counselor. It stemmed from dd asking what the Cert of Commendation can do for someone, and she told dd that many prestigeous schools want kids that are commended at their school. The counselor does agree with me about the debt thing, especially with dd's chosen majors. She also stated that MN has an excellent state school system, compared to some other states. I think part of their conversation happened also before my daughter told her that she wants to study film, and that is why she chose the school she did.
She said that she personally, went to a private college for her BA degree, and then a public school for her Masters. And all the other counselors in the building went public, and paid half of what she did for their education, and yet they all have the same job and make the same money. She said if she could go back, she would do it differently. She does tell the kids that story (not necessarily the part where she would do it differently) so that kids that can't afford private schools don't think that they are going to get a second class education.

 

[Gina]

He applied to the school, but they are waiting on his transcripts. His high school already sent them, so I guess it takes awhile to get posted. While he was there, he interviewed with the Professor of Military Science, which was a requirement for applying for the ROTC scholarship. He suggested that my son go to the Night-with-a-cadet program. My son is flying out tomorrow to attend it. After he attends that and gets accepted to the school, he can apply for the cadet scholarships. I think that's how it works. I guess we will see. This is all new to me.

Ah... the only reason I asked is because as I understand it, Engineering is now full as of a few days ago. I know a lot of people who aren't as familiar with A&M don't realize how popular the Engineering program is (as well as the Mays business program), and that is why everyone scrambles to apply August 1st.

I know they're still processing applications, though -- the auto-admits take up about 80-90% of the available spots, and most of those have already been accepted -- but someone who is an auto-admit can apply right up to the deadline and still get in, just not to the major of their choice.

The Corps is amazing... My son wanted no part of it, but we both have immense respect for those Cadets! They are some of the most disciplined, polite-yet-warm people you will ever meet. Good luck to your son!

 

[PrincessKsMom]

I actually just got off the phone with the counselor. It stemmed from dd asking what the Cert of Commendation can do for someone, and she told dd that many prestigeous schools want kids that are commended at their school. The counselor does agree with me about the debt thing, especially with dd's chosen majors. She also stated that MN has an excellent state school system, compared to some other states. I think part of their conversation happened also before my daughter told her that she wants to study film, and that is why she chose the school she did.
She said that she personally, went to a private college for her BA degree, and then a public school for her Masters. And all the other counselors in the building went public, and paid half of what she did for their education, and yet they all have the same job and make the same money. She said if she could go back, she would do it differently. She does tell the kids that story (not necessarily the part where she would do it differently) so that kids that can't afford private schools don't think that they are going to get a second class education.

Glad you were able to speak with her GC and get a clearer picture of what was said.

 

[TLuvsD]

elgerber, and others, run the cost of attendance/financial aid calculators for each school...sometimes the privates will be more generous than you might expect. In our case, between merit and financial aid, it's less to send our D to the pricey private than it would be to the state school. She applied widely, and had a nice list to choose from come May 1st.

I have a friend who has a son at Yale, he loves his school, but it is not perfect. the mail system is horrid, and there is a large garbage dumpster outside the dorm. The smell is unreal--so bad that he went and slept on the floor in a friend's room. Every school has pluses and minuses, and they are unique for each situation/family. And don't underestimate the value of being able to come home from time to time. They need to spread their wings, but sometimes they need to return to the nest, too.

 

[elgerber]

elgerber, and others, run the cost of attendance/financial aid calculators for each school...sometimes the privates will be more generous than you might expect. In our case, between merit and financial aid, it's less to send our D to the pricey private than it would be to the state school. She applied widely, and had a nice list to choose from come May 1st.

I have a friend who has a son at Yale, he loves his school, but it is not perfect. the mail system is horrid, and there is a large garbage dumpster outside the dorm. The smell is unreal--so bad that he went and slept on the floor in a friend's room. Every school has pluses and minuses, and they are unique for each situation/family. And don't underestimate the value of being able to come home from time to time. They need to spread their wings, but sometimes they need to return to the nest, too.

I have run some calculators and because our State school has such a low cost to begin with, none of the other schools have been able to come close. Some of the schools, like Yale (not that she is going there) don't offer merit aid, only need based. We are totally screwed at schools like that. Although my income is most likely going to be half next year what it was this year. Not that FAFSA will care, since it's based on this years numbers.

 

[TLuvsD]

Just FYI (because someone may need this information, not because I think you should send your D to Yale), you can file paperwork with the school in situations where the FASFA gives an inaccurate picture. Generally, it's an appeal of Financial Aid, some schools will take the info in January. Obviously, the appeals are not always successful, but in many cases they are--worth finding out about the process and giving it a try, especially if the income is likely to be halved.
Financial Aid sees 3 income streams --past (assumes you could/should have saved), current (what they determine is available) and future (this is where the loans come in to play). So a major change in one stream may or may not have a big impact. But additional dollars are additional dollars, any way you look at it.

 

[elgerber]

Just FYI (because someone may need this information, not because I think you should send your D to Yale), you can file paperwork with the school in situations where the FASFA gives an inaccurate picture. Generally, it's an appeal of Financial Aid, some schools will take the info in January. Obviously, the appeals are not always successful, but in many cases they are--worth finding out about the process and giving it a try, especially if the income is likely to be halved.
Financial Aid sees 3 income streams --past (assumes you could/should have saved), current (what they determine is available) and future (this is where the loans come in to play). So a major change in one stream may or may not have a big impact. But additional dollars are additional dollars, any way you look at it.

Thank you, good information to know, for any school, including the state school. As we will fill out the FAFSA no matter where she goes.