Parents of College Class of 2018 (A.K.A., "Is this the line to the poor house?")

[IDoDis]

Anyone else's kids taking an elective you weren't so sure about at first?
(

the way the higher level learners are scheduled at DS school is 4 challenging (honors/AP level) classes, one class where they're a teacher's aid, and then a not so rigorous elective. DS is taking multimedia publishing. He wanted to get into Journalism (which surprised the heck out of me!) and it was full. It's a pretty good balance. Last year he took PE2. Now that was the one I wasn't so sure about. LOLOL

DD's AP Psych elective is going to mess up her wonderful GPA. Right now weighted it's a 4.25 and unweighted is a 4.0. Straight A student for 3 years in a row, and now this elective is going to change all of that. I don't want to be a whiner, but this guy does not give any relevant instruction/notes and only grades on tests. She has a 100 question multiple choice test every 2 weeks! 100 questions -- and many of the questions have six multiple-choice options. DD is smart, but with so much to study ALL the time, and no real direction from the teacher, she is not doing so great. She got a D on the first test and a C on the 2nd test. The class average was so low, that he added 10 points to everyone's last test, so that at least raised her score to a B. DD is getting discouraged and wishes she never took the darned class. She had enough credits to not even have that class and one other class she also took. She could have been out of school by 9:30am one day and 11:00 another day, but wanted to take the classes.

The teacher now says the students can take a make-up test, but he never gives the old tests back so they can see what they missed and what they need to study. He doesn't even tell them their grades. If a student asks what they got on the test he tells them they have to look it up online. He never reviews before the test or goes over things after the test, or in between tests, for that matter! DD is so frustrated! The teacher told the kids that they are wasting electrons in their brain worrying and instead should focus that energy on their school work. So the guy isn't even approachable about how to get help.

 

[elgerber]

IDoDis, can I join in your pain???

I just need to whine, I know I am being stupid and irrational, but I need to whine somewhere, and I am hoping I can do it here without being judged.

My dd is already accepted to her school, it's a state school, so that is not a problem. I am whining because she is taking AP Calc online, because she couldn't get it at school, and I have found out her grade right now is an 82. Then I checked her regular school grades, and AP English is at 86.67 (she plans to major in English LOL, and is teachers pet in her English class), and she has a C in Econ currently, with one small assignment missing, and a not so great test.
She has been straight A's since 6th grade when she got 2 B's in math. She got a 34 on her ACT and is over 4.0 on her cumlative GPA for high school. It appears that will now be over. I know we are only a month in, but it's hard to raise your grades back up.
Now, like I said, I know I am being stupid, in the grand scheme of things it's not that big of a deal, and I'm sure she can hopefully raise that C back to a B, but 3 B's for her is unheard of. She has never had to put any effort into school, rarely ever had homework, and aced everything. I had told her that would not last forever, and it appears that time has finally come. She needs to start putting in some more effort, and I texted her that. That was probably not the greatest thing to do, since she may read it at lunch, and I hope she doesn't feel crappy for the day because of it, that won't help anything.
Don't get me wrong, she is a GREAT kid, not mouthy, happy, smart, likes to hang out with me still, but this is making me feel sick.
She has a small scholarship already at the college, that is automatic. There is a slightly larger competitive one, that I do not know how you get, but it's possible this might mess that up too.
I think my biggest hangup is they post pics of all the kids who graduate with a 4.0 in the paper and I have always hoped that would be her. Seriously, I am being irrational, I know, but I really needed to whine. My hubby is not real understanding of slacking grades (even though he sure had them so I am not going to whine to him.
Ok, sorry, I just had to get that out, sorry it was so long.

 

[madge]

Erica ... have progress reports come out yet? maybe that will be the kick in the pants your DD needs to get it in gear.

I think it's normal to feel disappointed, but don't give up hope just yet! It's still early!

 

[PrincessKsMom]

Whine away. I won't invalidate your feelings. I'm sure she's probably just as stunned as you are. I'm sure it has to be a knock to her ego that she can't maintain that perfect GPA. And while I'm sure you're both disappointed, use this as a learning opportunity. She may never get that perfect GPA back but she can certainly set a goal for herself to get it back up to a certain level. And maybe it's better she learn this lesson now than when she's off at college. You can help her to realize that just because her GPA isn't perfect, that doesn't mean she's any less perfect in your eyes. She is more than her GPA.

DD has also been accepted to a State school and got a small scholarship. When we submitted the forms her ranking for mid-Junior year (I thought end of Junior year) was 24 out of 567 (somewhere around 567). We just got her end of Junior year ranking yesterday and now it's actually 27 out of 627 (apparently the graduating class size discrepancy has something to do with kids taking summer school classes and making up for previously failed classes). Anyway, even though she could sit back and coast, she has 3 AP classes this year. And she took Prob & Stats and Forensic Science, neither of which she needs to graduate. She's doing okay but senior year seems to be off to a rocky start in some of her classes. But she's pushing herself beyond what she needs to and, even though she's already been accepted to her school, she told me she wants to graduate in the top 20. I was impressed that she was continuing to set goals for herself. And while I don't think she is likely to attain that goal, it is giving her something to focus on an work towards. Maybe that's the biggest win of all.

 

[Gina]

IDoDis, can I join in your pain???

I just need to whine, I know I am being stupid and irrational, but I need to whine somewhere, and I am hoping I can do it here without being judged.

First off, . No judgment here! I think everyone in this group has been amazingly supportive and grounded, and I'm so happy to have this group. It might be the one oasis of non-judgment on the CB, at least from what I've seen here over the past 14 years.

Honestly, I think our kids are just worn out at this point, and sick of school. I know mine is. And it sounded like everyone's kids had summers that were just as busy as the school year. I know my DS was telling me about how he's SO looking forward to next summer, where he'll "only" be working -- instead of working, band camp, writing essays, etc.

His grades so far aren't all A's or anything, but they're not awful. He does know that with him going into Engineering, they will be looking most closely at his grades for AP Calculus and AP Physics this year, so he has been making those his priority. Not that he can flunk out of English or Econ! But they won't carry the same weight if he gets an A in one of those but a C in Calc or Physics.

You're not being stupid or irrational, we just want our kids to do their best so they get the best. Or maybe we're all stupid and irrational -- but at least we have each other.


IDoDis -- That's a whole other can of worms... I would be talking to someone over there -- counselor, principal, whomever -- and try to find an acceptable solution. I would NOT be happy in yours or your DD's shoes, I know that. Best of luck, and keep us posted!!


Small step closer to seeing my son's face light up -- Logged into the Howdy Portal and it *finally* is on Step 3 and says "A decision on this application was mailed 9/25." He will be SO happy to have that letter!! Just to have it. Will let y'all know.


-gina-

 

[elgerber]

Small step closer to seeing my son's face light up -- Logged into the Howdy Portal and it *finally* is on Step 3 and says "A decision on this application was mailed 9/25." He will be SO happy to have that letter!! Just to have it. Will let y'all know.


-gina-

That's exciting! I am a very impatient person, waiting for anything makes me crazy! Will you be stalkign the mailbox for the next several days?

Thanks for letting me whine. Like I said I know it's irrational, and it's not going to kill anything, but my ideals for her I think.
My son had such a struggle through school, freaky smart, but with very mild Aspergers, so schoolwork was so hard for him, his senior year was the worst year of my life so far. She has been so easy, I've never had to think about her grades, and I was just assuming/hoping this year would be the same.

 

[madge]

She has been so easy, I've never had to think about her grades, and I was just assuming/hoping this year would be the same.

that would be my DS.

geometry was the GPA killer, sophomore year. then Pre-Calculus last year. Grades are still excellent ... but there's not much room for error ... needs to maintain the GPA he has for a few (thankfully not all) scholarship applications. He can get one B this semester. One.

With that said, it will only matter if he has to send a transcript that includes this year's grades. Most of the competitive scholarship applications are due before the end of the semester. I'm waiting for confirmation of that from our guidance counselor ... who neither guides nor counsels.

Of course, you realize we're talking about kids who are upper level learners ... with excellent academic records. Our problems could be far, far worse. LOL

 

[elgerber]

Of course, you realize we're talking about kids who are upper level learners ... with excellent academic records. Our problems could be far, far worse. LOL

Yes I do, which I why I feel so stupid for being so upset .
It appears that the scholarships at her university also go by the grades at the time of application, so that is the 4.0+ that they have seen, at least that is what the website implies.

 

[madge]

Yes I do, which I why I feel so stupid for being so upset .

moment I knew I'd gone over the edge:

grades came in from DS college class this summer. I fussed because the A wasn't high enough.

seriously.

 

[Bluestars]

IDoDis, can I join in your pain???

I just need to whine, I know I am being stupid and irrational, but I need to whine somewhere, and I am hoping I can do it here without being judged.

My dd is already accepted to her school, it's a state school, so that is not a problem. I am whining because she is taking AP Calc online, because she couldn't get it at school, and I have found out her grade right now is an 82. Then I checked her regular school grades, and AP English is at 86.67 (she plans to major in English LOL, and is teachers pet in her English class), and she has a C in Econ currently, with one small assignment missing, and a not so great test.
She has been straight A's since 6th grade when she got 2 B's in math. She got a 34 on her ACT and is over 4.0 on her cumlative GPA for high school. It appears that will now be over. I know we are only a month in, but it's hard to raise your grades back up.
Now, like I said, I know I am being stupid, in the grand scheme of things it's not that big of a deal, and I'm sure she can hopefully raise that C back to a B, but 3 B's for her is unheard of. She has never had to put any effort into school, rarely ever had homework, and aced everything. I had told her that would not last forever, and it appears that time has finally come. She needs to start putting in some more effort, and I texted her that. That was probably not the greatest thing to do, since she may read it at lunch, and I hope she doesn't feel crappy for the day because of it, that won't help anything.
Don't get me wrong, she is a GREAT kid, not mouthy, happy, smart, likes to hang out with me still, but this is making me feel sick.
She has a small scholarship already at the college, that is automatic. There is a slightly larger competitive one, that I do not know how you get, but it's possible this might mess that up too.
I think my biggest hangup is they post pics of all the kids who graduate with a 4.0 in the paper and I have always hoped that would be her. Seriously, I am being irrational, I know, but I really needed to whine. My hubby is not real understanding of slacking grades (even though he sure had them so I am not going to whine to him.
Ok, sorry, I just had to get that out, sorry it was so long.

She's probably not as interested in high school now that it's her last year. All my son can think about is college. He works on applications and essays constantly. You should be very proud of the 34 on the ACT. I think that's much better than getting her picture in the paper. That is quite an accomplishment.

 

[Bluestars]

the way the higher level learners are scheduled at DS school is 4 challenging (honors/AP level) classes, one class where they're a teacher's aid, and then a not so rigorous elective. DS is taking multimedia publishing. He wanted to get into Journalism (which surprised the heck out of me!) and it was full. It's a pretty good balance. Last year he took PE2. Now that was the one I wasn't so sure about. LOLOL

That's close to what my son is taking. He's taking three honors courses, one AP, one elective, and is a teacher's aid.

 

[maxaroni]

Whine away. I won't invalidate your feelings. I'm sure she's probably just as stunned as you are. I'm sure it has to be a knock to her ego that she can't maintain that perfect GPA. And while I'm sure you're both disappointed, use this as a learning opportunity. She may never get that perfect GPA back but she can certainly set a goal for herself to get it back up to a certain level. And maybe it's better she learn this lesson now than when she's off at college. You can help her to realize that just because her GPA isn't perfect, that doesn't mean she's any less perfect in your eyes. She is more than her GPA.

DD has also been accepted to a State school and got a small scholarship. When we submitted the forms her ranking for mid-Junior year (I thought end of Junior year) was 24 out of 567 (somewhere around 567). We just got her end of Junior year ranking yesterday and now it's actually 27 out of 627 (apparently the graduating class size discrepancy has something to do with kids taking summer school classes and making up for previously failed classes). Anyway, even though she could sit back and coast, she has 3 AP classes this year. And she took Prob & Stats and Forensic Science, neither of which she needs to graduate. She's doing okay but senior year seems to be off to a rocky start in some of her classes. But she's pushing herself beyond what she needs to and, even though she's already been accepted to her school, she told me she wants to graduate in the top 20. I was impressed that she was continuing to set goals for herself. And while I don't think she is likely to attain that goal, it is giving her something to focus on an work towards. Maybe that's the biggest win of all.

Which state school? We are in NJ as well....originally from northern NJ

Congrats to your DD. Senior year was the toughest for DS20. Harder to stay focused and burnt out...he was ready to get out of HS.

 

[IDoDis]

IDoDis, can I join in your pain???

I just need to whine, I know I am being stupid and irrational, but I need to whine somewhere, and I am hoping I can do it here without being judged.

My dd is already accepted to her school, it's a state school, so that is not a problem. I am whining because she is taking AP Calc online, because she couldn't get it at school, and I have found out her grade right now is an 82. Then I checked her regular school grades, and AP English is at 86.67 (she plans to major in English LOL, and is teachers pet in her English class), and she has a C in Econ currently, with one small assignment missing, and a not so great test.
She has been straight A's since 6th grade when she got 2 B's in math. She got a 34 on her ACT and is over 4.0 on her cumlative GPA for high school. It appears that will now be over. I know we are only a month in, but it's hard to raise your grades back up.
Now, like I said, I know I am being stupid, in the grand scheme of things it's not that big of a deal, and I'm sure she can hopefully raise that C back to a B, but 3 B's for her is unheard of. She has never had to put any effort into school, rarely ever had homework, and aced everything. I had told her that would not last forever, and it appears that time has finally come. She needs to start putting in some more effort, and I texted her that. That was probably not the greatest thing to do, since she may read it at lunch, and I hope she doesn't feel crappy for the day because of it, that won't help anything.
Don't get me wrong, she is a GREAT kid, not mouthy, happy, smart, likes to hang out with me still, but this is making me feel sick.
She has a small scholarship already at the college, that is automatic. There is a slightly larger competitive one, that I do not know how you get, but it's possible this might mess that up too.
I think my biggest hangup is they post pics of all the kids who graduate with a 4.0 in the paper and I have always hoped that would be her. Seriously, I am being irrational, I know, but I really needed to whine. My hubby is not real understanding of slacking grades (even though he sure had them so I am not going to whine to him.
Ok, sorry, I just had to get that out, sorry it was so long.

I sooooo feel your pain! Sometimes I feel like us parents want these things more than our kids do! And I honestly don't remember having this kind of drive when I was in high school (the drive for a 4.0+GPA, scholarships, etc..). I do know how you feel though. Your DD has come so far with doing so great in school and you want her to get the recognition for that, but now it might be slipping away. Hopefully it's not too late to turn things around.

After catching up on this thread, I checked my DD's grades online and her current grades are all A's and A+ including her AP Calc and AP English Lit class -- except for that darn AP Psych class where her grade is a C+!!!! She has never had a grade like that! I can see it be possible if she was not putting in the effort, but she puts more effort in that class than any other class! She has a friend in college this year taking the intro Psych class and she has way less to do than DD does.

Now to top it all off, DD got a paper back which is the only paper they've done so far this year, and she got a 25% on it!!!! I am just stunned! I'm talking about a kid who has a non-verbal IQ of 141 and is ranked 6th in her class out of 392 unweighted and 15th weighted. Her writing is her strength. She has to work harder in math because that doesn't come as easy, but writing is not an issue at all. She scored a 34 on the writing section of the ACT and has just always done well in that area. In middle school she wrote an essay that was given the highest possible score and was in the category of what they called, "Wow Essays" that only a small handful of kids in the school attained.

Yet now, with this guy she gets an F -- a 25%! She said the way he scores the essays is that the students get either a 25%, a 75% or a 100%, and no one in the class got 100%. So you have an F, or a C as the highest scores. She must have missed something important on his rubric. I read her essay before she turned it in and thought it was very well done, so I have no idea what went wrong. I never saw his rubric. She can redo the essay and maybe get a 75% on it. If she does that, then her grade is still a 50% which is still an F. If by chance she were to get a 100% on the redo, the best she can do is come out with is a 63% because the two papers get averaged together. I don't know any college professor that grades this way with such a crazy percentage spread on an intro psych class.

I am going to take another poster's advice and make an appointment for DH and I to meet with the teacher and a counselor or someone??? I don't know if it will do any good because I don't expect him to change what he does. It just really stinks because DD did not need this class. I'm so mad I could spit bullets.

I'm sure I sound like a helicopter parent who has a snowflake child, but this is not the case. If this were my DS I was talking about, I'd be all over him to work harder and put in more effort because he's a slacker that needs the whip cracked from time to time, but DD is not a slacker and works nonstop to do well.

I just don't get it .

Thanks for letting me whine again.

 

[TLuvsD]

I'd take the paper, and the grades straight to the principal. They will likely direct you to talk to the teacher, but I'd start at the top to get my D out of that class.

 

[IDoDis]

I'd take the paper, and the grades straight to the principal. They will likely direct you to talk to the teacher, but I'd start at the top to get my D out of that class.

I will try, believe me. But we don't want her to have a WF on her transcript. It's almost 7 weeks into the school year and way too late to drop. However, since DD was taking this class because she wanted to and doesn't nee the credit, I'm wondering is that might open a window to drop the class. I told DD not to get her hopes up. She's already giving up and burned out. She has another huge 100 question test on Tuesday and a lot of other work in her other classes. She told her boss at work to cut her down to 14 hours a week vs the 19-20 that she was doing, so that will help some with her stress. It's just this one class.

I would not freak out so bad if she got a B. While it would be a bummer that sh'd be off of the 4.0 honor roll and not get to wear that cord at graduation, it won't matter much in the scheme of things. But now she's already at a C+ and it could get even worse if she just gives up.

 

[TLuvsD]

How long has the teacher been teaching this class? What's the AP pass ratio? Does anyone else teach the class at the high school or a neighboring school? If so, what's the typical workload for that teacher/school.

See if you can get her out with a WP, she's not failing. She's one of the top students, perhaps you can get her out without it being on the transcript at all.

Some teachers just want to prove their class is "top". It makes the kids crazy and serves no real purpose. Sorry your D is caught up in this mess.

 

[IDoDis]

How long has the teacher been teaching this class? What's the AP pass ratio? Does anyone else teach the class at the high school or a neighboring school? If so, what's the typical workload for that teacher/school.

See if you can get her out with a WP, she's not failing. She's one of the top students, perhaps you can get her out without it being on the transcript at all.

Some teachers just want to prove their class is "top". It makes the kids crazy and serves no real purpose. Sorry your D is caught up in this mess.

Thanks for the advice! I will look into the WP. I don't know why I was thinking WF was the only option. I think that's what someone told DD. I really don't know how long the teacher has been teaching AP Psych. I asked DD and she didn't know. He's been at the school for at least 8 years, but above that I don't really know. I know years ago he taught an elective at the school called, "The History of Rock-n-Roll" but somewhere down the line, that class was no longer taught.

DD's friend who is now a freshman in college majoring in Psychology, had AP Psych at her high school last year which is about 4 miles away from DD's school. She said the class was interesting and easy and that lots of kids took the class because the teacher is super popular. It's also a requirement that high school students take at least one AP class or one dual-enrollment college class to graduate. At this other school, lots of the non-AP track kid take the AP Psych for that one AP credit they need. Not so at DD's school though. So there's a big discrepancy.

 

[elgerber]

I'm sure I sound like a helicopter parent who has a snowflake child, but this is not the case. If this were my DS I was talking about, I'd be all over him to work harder and put in more effort because he's a slacker that needs the whip cracked from time to time, but DD is not a slacker and works nonstop to do well.

I just don't get it .

Thanks for letting me whine again.

You don't sound like that at all to me! I totally get it!!! I sure hope some kind of solution can be reached. If she doens't need the class to graduate, I would see if there is any way to drop it. My son screwed up his AP Calc class his senior year, barely passed the class (and then got a 4 on his freakin' AP test) and I found out he could have dropped it, 2 days after the drop deadline!

My dd's econ grade might be saveable, I was not reading it all correctly, and yes it's a c+, but the bad test score was a practice test that doesn't count. It's just the missing rough draft that is hitting her, and she says that was turned in and will talk to the teacher today. So she has 35 points of 45, and if that paper is found and given full credit, she could go back to 100%. Now the AP Calc and English, she will have to find a way to work harder.

Today is homecoming, she left in her painted senior t-shirt today, quit growing up!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[IDoDis]

You don't sound like that at all to me! I totally get it!!! I sure hope some kind of solution can be reached. If she doens't need the class to graduate, I would see if there is any way to drop it. My son screwed up his AP Calc class his senior year, barely passed the class (and then got a 4 on his freakin' AP test) and I found out he could have dropped it, 2 days after the drop deadline!

My dd's econ grade might be saveable, I was not reading it all correctly, and yes it's a c+, but the bad test score was a practice test that doesn't count. It's just the missing rough draft that is hitting her, and she says that was turned in and will talk to the teacher today. So she has 35 points of 45, and if that paper is found and given full credit, she could go back to 100%. Now the AP Calc and English, she will have to find a way to work harder.

Today is homecoming, she left in her painted senior t-shirt today, quit growing up!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh, that's wonderful that maybe this all can be fixed for your DD. I hope it all works out for her. We've had things like that happen where a zero is given for something that WAS turned, graded and handed back. DS has a situation like that right now that has been showing up on his grades since Aug. 18th. He's spoken to the teacher, she said she'd fix it, but it's still not fixed.

DD's homecoming is today and tomorrow, too! Today is the coronation assembly, tonight is the football game, and tomorrow is the dance. Good times!!!

 

[elgerber]

Oh, that's wonderful that maybe this all can be fixed for your DD. I hope it all works out for her. We've had things like that happen where a zero is given for something that WAS turned, graded and handed back. DS has a situation like that right now that has been showing up on his grades since Aug. 18th. He's spoken to the teacher, she said she'd fix it, but it's still not fixed.

DD's homecoming is today and tomorrow, too! Today is the coronation assembly, tonight is the football game, and tomorrow is the dance. Good times!!!

Don't you love it when teachers miss things, and then take forever to fix them??

Our homecoming dance is immediately after the football game tonight, so the kids are in jeans and t-shirts LOL, and sweaty.
Oddly, it's supposed to be 85 degrees today, and I am in MN! That is a darn warm homecoming game!

On a side note, our school is doing their first ever fall play (we have done 3 musicals so far in the spring, but nothing in the fall), and my dd was cast as the Stage Manager (IE Narrarator ) in Our Town.