Over the Top Prom invites- Is this now a thing?

[wdwmom0f3]

They are just getting in to that around here. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet though.

My daughter was asked the regular old way last year, and her date this year is more of an arranged thing than a date. They don't really "know" each other but she is going with him as a friend. I think it's sweet. . He is kind of shy so we will see how this goes.

She is really wanting to be asked this way at some point. She still has two more proms to go!

 

[NHdisneylover]

Sometimes I am very sad when I think about DD17 being a Senior next year and missing out on prom and graduation ceremonies, etc because we live abroad and she attends an online school. Then I read about trends like this and I am thankfully her senior year will be without them It seems was over blown and silly to me--and I am pretty sure she would hate it to--she hates being "put on the spot" in public and generally dislikes big fusses made for no reason.

It is definitely a "thing" around here, even among established couples. .

I find that even weirder- I always thought it was pretty much a given that you would be going to prom together if you were an established couple It certainly was when I was a teen (but, I am from ancient times so what do I know )

 

[Katelly]

Yes, it's a 'thing' here as well, unfortunately. I was just talking about this with my dd17 the other day. These kids are spending a ton of money on these promposals (or whatever the kids call them).

I asked my dd what would happen if a guy and girl were dating and the guy didn't do one of these fancy "go to prom with me?" things. My dd said that the girl would usually break up with the guy over that. Seriously???

I told her I thought it was pretty obvious if that if you're dating someone you'll go to prom with them. Why the waste of money on these elaborate promposals?She looked at me like I was crazy.

 

[usd2bmd]

It's a thing here too...But it isn't just the boys. My daughter is a senior and the boy she is currently "talking" to doesn't go to her school so she had to ask him.
He's a baseball player so she just wrote PROM? on a baseball and tossed it to him when he came to see her.

I can handle her spending a couple bucks for a baseball but not much more than that considering how much this is going to cost when all is said and done.

 

[KBoopaloo]

I graduated in 2001, and this was not a thing then.

I have seen it being a "thing" in the past several years. I first remember seeing it on Laguna Beach (haha)

Yes, I also feel sorry for the boys.

YES! Just the other day, my aunt was telling me about my godson's elaborate prom date proposal and I said "This is not the way it was when I was in HS. I blame those kids from Laguna Beach!" LOL

 

[NHdisneylover]

Yes, it's a 'thing' here as well, unfortunately. I was just talking about this with my dd17 the other day. These kids are spending a ton of money on these promposals (or whatever the kids call them).

I asked my dd what would happen if a guy and girl were dating and the guy didn't do one of these fancy "go to prom with me?" things. My dd said that the girl would usually break up with the guy over that. Seriously???

I told her I thought it was pretty obvious if that if you're dating someone you'll go to prom with them. Why the waste of money on these elaborate promposals?She looked at me like I was crazy.

Wow I guess the boy would be lucky to be rid of a girl like that, geez

 

[mjkacmom]

It is here. Dd17 had a lead in the HS play, and in the last line of her bio, in the program, she asked her bf to prom. They've been dating for almost 2 years, and he's off at college (came down for the play), so it was just a formality. He did something simple last year (can't remember what).

Prom has always been pretty big here - $100+ tickets, sit down dinner at a banquet hall, limos and party buses (even when I went 25 years ago, no one drove)... Dd and her friends are using a party bus, which will bring them down the shore after the prom, where they will spend the weekend (they will drive cars down the day before).

The only thing that has changed is the elaborate askings. Ds15 was invited to the junior formal by some girl, but I don't know (or really care) how she asked him.

 

[AddictedtoDoleWhip]

This really isn't anything new, when I was in High School which wasn't super long ago [mid 2000's], asking someone to prom was super elaborate and extremely detailed. Same with Homecoming.

 

[Maryr1]

It is here-I have seen cakes, cupcakes spelling out PROM, my niece got fortune cookies filled with custom "fortunes", balloons and flowers..... it's kind of crazy. My dd is a special ed kid who won't get an invite so it is hard for her to watch. Last year the beautiful girl across the street (who helps out with my dd) included us in the pre-prom festivities-we helped her with a little get together and she had my dd help out with the refreshments and get pictures taken with the other kids. My dd had a blast! She was thrilled to be a part of it. One of the boys was driving his fathers Lambo and ALL the dads were all over that!

 

[Mrs. Ciz]

It is a big thing here and my son is not happy about it! He is a junior. His friends told him a girl he's been friends with all year wanted to go to prom with him. So he said he'd call her and ask her. Noooooooo all the girls said - It has to be "Instagramable"! He was so annoyed. He's a quiet kid, grand gestures are not his thing and they aren't even dating. But he did as he was told. Made a big poster and stood outside of a school function with it so everyone could see and her friends could take and post pictures.

All this prom drama happened last week. Last week also happened to be the end of the 3rd quarter, so he had a ton of tests. He was looking at getting his first B (in AP English) since 3rd grade (pulled it up to an A at the last second). His SAT scores came in (not as good as he wanted so now he has to study). He had his first college visit...the poor kid was so stressed out by it all he came down with Shingles!!!!! Thank God Spring Break is in 2 weeks. He needs to blow off some steam.

 

[luvsJack]

Its a "thing" here too. One boy spelled out "Prom?" in baseball bats across the football field. One used post it notes all over her car. Another brought the girl a puppy, it had a collar and a tag that said "Prom?". Some just go ahead and get down on one knee and present the girl with a ring pop and ask her. One gave the girl a fish in a bowl and some kind of silly poem went with it. Another filled her bedroom with balloons. She had to pop them as she went in and he was standing in the middle with flowers and a sign that asked her.

Dd and her bf are sophomores. She told him he has a whole year to figure something out. Bless his heart. Good thing he has a very creative mom and doesn't mind asking for help.

 

[Shutterbug]

This is one of the most ridiculous things I have heard. All that just for prom? If I would ask a girl to prom and she said "no it has to be done with fan fair", I would be looking for another date or go stag with a bunch of friends.

 

[wenrob]

Yep, big thing here too. Prom and Homecoming, boys and girls both do the asking/displays. Thankfully my DD's friends all go out as a group. If they have a girl/boyfriend they join the group. A couple of those kids might do the "promposal" or whatever you want to call it but not many, they're a pretty laid back group thank goodness. Usually I do pics at a nice park for them, they go to dinner, the prom then sometimes a midnight movie. The biggest expense for us is the dress. (my sister is a hairdresser and one of the nail girls gives her quick mani while she gets her hair done) That's about as fancy as it gets for her, no limos, no craziness. She's always been well aware that I'll pay for a reasonably priced dress and will not ever pay for a limo. If she wants over the top, she has to pay for it herself. It's never happened, lol.

 

[rszdtrvl]

DS is asking another girl tomorrow. If she doesn't say yes, he will just go stag. He is confident enough to go alone, and went alone to Homecoming Freshman year and had a blast dancing with the girls while their dates took a break.

I stole an idea from this board - the one with the DumDum's gave me an idea that DS absolutely loved :

On posterboard :

Hey (movie theatre size of Sugar Babies) girlsname
I won't be a (movie theatre size of Cry Baby candy - sour candies)
If you'll be a (movie theatre size of Sweet Tarts)
and go to Prom with me!

 

[Jeafl]

It's been a big thing around here for many years, unfortunately.

When my son asked his date a few years ago he bought a Willy Wonka candy bar, opened it up carefully, and put in a "golden ticket" that he made out of some gold foil scrapbooking paper he bought. He then rewrapped it carefully and presented it to her.

It was really cute and only cost him a couple of dollars.

 

[Agent7]

I know a lot of people feel bad for the boys (and I do) but I feel bad for the girls too. It seems like the "promposals" are being equated to how much the guy likes you (ie. the more complex the more he cares). Which isn't true - but try telling an emotional 16 year old that, especially if her friends a had "instagramable" "promposals" and she didn't. I feel like these things set people up for disappointment when the real proposal isn't half as fancy.

 

[Fortuosity]

Reeks of desperation and attention-seeking to me. If I'd have had to do this crap to get a date or a spouse, I'd have taken a pass.

 

[luvsJack]

The vast majority of the ones here are done by couples who have been dating for awhile so its pretty much a given that the one being asked will say yes.

Most of them are cute but the guys really aren't doing all that and taking a chance of being told no.

I would hope that by the time they are proposed to they are old enough to realize that they can't expect "bigger, better, more". But then again, how many are proposed to in front of Cinderella castle every year? Or on a beach at sunset?

Its just a part of high school and their overly romantic ideals.

 

[Disney Doll]

Yuk. I would have hated that.

 

[Art 1]

We always and still do referred to the prom as, the prom.

Now they just call it, prom.