Out of work (long)

[newtowdw1]

Hi. I have lurked here quite a lot, but needed to post. I just decided that I can't work anymore, at least for awhile. I finally bought a cane that I use almost all the time. I guess I just need a little sympathy.

For 13 years I've lived with chronic nerve pain. I've had two children, a full time job (HS teacher), and a DH who also teaches, coaches, sells car parts, etc.... I've managed to hang on until three weeks ago. This entire school year I've come home from school and pretty much had to lie down until I got up for work the next day.

Well, three weeks ago, I couldn't go to work. The pain was excruciating, my balance was bad, I just couldn't deal. So I've been out of work since that time. I guess what's upsetting me is that in the past I've been able to re-group, and get on with life after some rest. But now, for 3 weeks, I've had a total of 4 to 6 hours a day when I can do something other than lie in bed. Yesterday I went into school to encourage my AP Biology students, and then picked up my kids from school. I was out and around for about 5 hours. This morning I can't do anything. I have searing, jabbing pain.

Now I'm looking at not going back to school possibly ever. I'm trying to get in to see a new pain specialist, but things move so slowly.

I know I'm better off than many others. So I usually don't complain at all. But I guess I just needed to vent a little.

 

[Piper]

Vent away. I understand some of what you are going through. You need to do what is best for you. I hope you find something that works.

 

[SueM in MN]

yes, feel free to vent.
I am going to move this thread to the disABILITIES Community Board (a better place for venting than the travel board).

 

[LauraVV]

Hi. I have lurked here quite a lot, but needed to post. I just decided that I can't work anymore, at least for awhile. I finally bought a cane that I use almost all the time. I guess I just need a little sympathy.

For 13 years I've lived with chronic nerve pain.

Are you taking meds for the nerve pain? Can you use a scooter? Have you investigated other means of accommodating your pain issues? Are there things like leaning over to retrieve dropped items that worsen your pain? I'm wondering if there are ways you can work around your issue?

I'm a nurse. I used to work in the hospital. When that got too difficult I went to home health. That got too difficult so I now work at home. It's much easier on my body. It took some adjustment but I can still work. I just work around my issues.

I have a friend who has a service dog. He retrieves papers she drops, opens elevators and doors, etc. She has mobility issues due to lupus and has broken several bones. She, too, has had to work around her issues.

I'm sorry about the pain. My son has painful neuropathy. It's no fun at all!

 

[newtowdw1]

I use a scooter at wdw, or when we go on vacation and plan to walk a lot. Until recently, I could walk to do groceries and regular shopping. Now a scooter would not help as I can't sit very long. I can't bend without shooting pain, my left foot is numb or tingles, and I can't bend my toes. I've been dealing with those problems for years, but now I can't bend at all. I can hardly walk with my legs because my balance is so bad.

Fortunately my children are wonderful helpers. I have just gotten a VERY smart puppy that I am thinking of training to bring me things I've dropped. I have lots of dog training experience. A friend comes in a cleans once a week, and during my few hours up I can putter around the kitchen.

My grief is that I won't be able to teach. My church desperately wants me to work for them as much as I can. They're very willing for me to work at home and at limited hours. So, as one door slams shut, another opens.

Thanks everyone for your kind words.

Oh, and yes, I've been taking pain meds for years. In November, when the pain accelerated, I changed prescriptions. It is helping, but not enough. I think part of the problem is that I did as much as I could whenever I could, and now I've stressed my condition (never completely diagnosed) to the point that I need a LOT of rest.

I'm very frustrated. I'm a take-charge sort, and have run VBS, the church choirs (children), three clubs at school, planned numerous vacations (for me and others), the paint ball group at church. Now, suddenly I can't do any of it. And yes, I see the irony. Well, duh, if you are injured, and go full tilt, you eventually collapse. I've just never collapsed so completely before.

 

[ireland_nicole]

support found here. We get it; and feel for your loss. It's ok to grieve some for what you can no longer do that is so central to your identity. When you've taken a little time for that, I bet you'll find some way to use your gifts and talents, maybe just in a little bit different way.
Nicole

 

[bzzymom]

I am sorry to hear of your pain. It is terrible to hurt so bad. I am a nurse as well and have been off of work for a year from a back injury caused by a confused, unruly patient. They finally just figured out that I injured a facet, so I am going to have a radiofrequency nerve ablation of the medial nerve branches of L3, 4 and 5. I hope it(on5/20) will help so I can get back on my feet. I really want to get my life back. I think getting a second opinion would be a good thing for you.

 

[Ms_Butterfly]

***HUG***

I think what I have is nerve pain, although at a MUCH lesser level than you do (when I first got it - just woke up with it one morning a few years ago - it was worse [allodynia on my legs all day long and I thought I'd broken my ankle when I took a step one time {it only hurt that bad but wasn't injured} and such], but then it got better and is now mostly in my feet [right where my toes meet my feet so I can't bend them without tons of pain {can't walk normally and that affects my lethargy from another of my disabilities 'cause it takes more energy to walk this way than the normal way}] and sometimes allodynia in my legs or feet and sometimes my wrists pain, too).

You're right that sometimes God closes a door and opens another, so maybe you've completed your mission at the school and He wants to use you elsewhere now. You'll find where you're s'posed to be if you listen, which it sounds like you are doing.

It sounds like it will be a good thing for you to train your dog to do tasks for you, even if he is only an at-home service dog instead of a public-access one. It sure will save you from pain and losing energy! (I user a green laser pointer to indicate what objects my SD should retrieve for me if they aren't objects she knows the names of, by the way.)

Remember, it is NOT a bad thing to take a rest for yourself!! In fact, it is a NEEDED thing 'cause you can't help others if your own gas tank is on empty.

 

[newtowdw1]

support found here. We get it; and feel for your loss. It's ok to grieve some for what you can no longer do that is so central to your identity. When you've taken a little time for that, I bet you'll find some way to use your gifts and talents, maybe just in a little bit different way.
Nicole

Thank you. I try not to upset my family, and it's nice to have a group of my own.

 

[newtowdw1]

I am sorry to hear of your pain. It is terrible to hurt so bad. I am a nurse as well and have been off of work for a year from a back injury caused by a confused, unruly patient. They finally just figured out that I injured a facet, so I am going to have a radiofrequency nerve ablation of the medial nerve branches of L3, 4 and 5. I hope it(on5/20) will help so I can get back on my feet. I really want to get my life back. I think getting a second opinion would be a good thing for you.

I'm very interested in the nerve ablation. I've also read that my pain meds may not be the right ones for my nerve pain. So, in two weeks, when I should get into the new pain doc, I'll have new avenues.

Good luck with the ablation. Please post here on the community board and let us know how it went. I'll pray for you.

 

[newtowdw1]

***HUG***

I think what I have is nerve pain, although at a MUCH lesser level than you do (when I first got it - just woke up with it one morning a few years ago - it was worse [allodynia on my legs all day long and I thought I'd broken my ankle when I took a step one time {it only hurt that bad but wasn't injured} and such], but then it got better and is now mostly in my feet [right where my toes meet my feet so I can't bend them without tons of pain {can't walk normally and that affects my lethargy from another of my disabilities 'cause it takes more energy to walk this way than the normal way}] and sometimes allodynia in my legs or feet and sometimes my wrists pain, too).

You're right that sometimes God closes a door and opens another, so maybe you've completed your mission at the school and He wants to use you elsewhere now. You'll find where you're s'posed to be if you listen, which it sounds like you are doing.

It sounds like it will be a good thing for you to train your dog to do tasks for you, even if he is only an at-home service dog instead of a public-access one. It sure will save you from pain and losing energy! (I user a green laser pointer to indicate what objects my SD should retrieve for me if they aren't objects she knows the names of, by the way.)

Remember, it is NOT a bad thing to take a rest for yourself!! In fact, it is a NEEDED thing 'cause you can't help others if your own gas tank is on empty.

Thank you for your kind words. They really helped! Esp. that I need to rest.

I am excited about training Buddy. At the vet today (he strained a muscle in his left rear leg) I got a great recommendation for a clicker trainer. Turns out he does exactly what I'm looking for, and will come to the house for a reasonable fee. With Buddy and I both broken, we'll be able to work on the basics, and get really good at it.

I'm very interested in your service dog. What kinds of things can he/she do for you? Did you get him/her through the official group?

 

[Ms_Butterfly]

Thank you for your kind words. They really helped! Esp. that I need to rest.

I saw on a Web site the other day (while doing a Google search) that there is a device (similar to pacemakers and the epilepsy & depression devices) you can get for nerve pain now. I guess Jerry Lewis got one and has no more nerve pain or something, according to the site I read. They first just implant the wires and keep the device on the outside of your body to see if it works for you. Once they know it works for you, they can implant the device, too. (That part is different from the other devices, which have to be fully implanted.)

I'm very interested in your service dog. What kinds of things can he/she do for you? Did you get him/her through the official group?

She retrieves objects (either ones that she knows the name of or ones that I indicate via a laser pointer or some other clear method), picks up dropped objects, can bring objects to somebody else, etc. She helps me walk using her training and a mobility harness, helping with balance, counter-balance, and momentum pulling. Her other tasks are for my other disabilities (actually, the walking ones are mostly, too), although the circling me one and that I can tell her just where to stand or sit can also be used to block ppl from bumping into me, accidentally causing pain.

She doesn't help with the laundry or anything (no offense to her, but I don't want her mouth on my clean clothes!), but some ppl do have their dogs help with that.

Oh - and I went through a private trainer who trained and certified her as my service dog.