Discussion in 'Budget Board' started by windycitymom, Jun 7, 2009.
I don't see a problem. Proper education and erasing the taboo is the key to preventing binge drinking.
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I agree that it is none of your business. Maybe the parents are trying their own form of aversion therapy (whiskey is an "acquired" taste, after all).
I understand your concern, but I would butt out.
I would leave it alone. My granfather use to give me sips here and there and I see no problem with it. Im portugues and its common for young people to have wine. I say its not your child so leave it alone
Nothing wrong with it, its just like in Europe. I was raised the same way, my parents were always offering me sips of wine as young as 8 or 9. It's perfectly normal, and maybe if the United States was more like that, underage drinking and binge drinking wouldn't be a big deal in the U.S., as it isn't in most of Europe.
In Wisconsin, children are allowed to drink beer and wine if accompanied with their parents.
I firmly believe America has the underage/binge drinking problems it does because of how Americans take such a taboo attitude towards it. Such an attitude is unnecessary and unfortunate. Hopefully one day the U.S. will adapt a drinking age of 14 for beer/wine and 16 for hard liquor that is so common elsewhere.
In Europe, the only major countries with drinking ages are France (16), Germany (16) and the United Kingdom (5). No other major countries have drinking ages, although some have limitations on at what age one can go to a pub/bar or purchase hard liquor.
Being from Europe ancestors I do agree, over there it's no big deal. However they don't have the crime, the alcoholism, the DUI's, etc that we have here. You can drink at any age in Germany, where we are from. I was 16 when I visited last and had quite a few beers. (Their beer tastes WAY different than anything here) But like I said, they don't have the problems we do here.... if you're around it and it's no big deal, why would you become an alcoholic? If you're taught to be responsible.... Now I'm not saying break the law over here, I'm just saying if I were in Germany. What's the saying? When in Rome? BTW in Germany if you're caught driving while intoxicated you lose your license for LIFE, first time, no questions asked. I agree with that and would support implementing that in the states! Also there you can walk anywhere you want to go in your own town...it's way different than here. You can drive across the entire country in oh, a little more than 8 hrs. OT! Sorry
Not to start a huge debate, but how come I can send my 18 year old to war but he can't drink a beer legally until he's 21? I mean, this is how it's been for quite awhile but I think that's where the binge drinking in college comes from. "Oh I'm not 'allowed' until I'm 21, so I'll drink all I can until I am legal".
Also, my dad gave me alcohol when I was young, let me pour my own drink and all! Boy did I feel like BIG STUFF. It was the worst tasting thing I ever had and to this day I don't drink often. Never beer, it's disgusting. But I think it was because he let me try it, thinking I was being adult about it. I didn't know that then but I realize that now.
And I let my children drink virgin dacquri's if they want, it's not hurting a thing and they love the glass and the pink frozen slush.
I really think that it wasn't a huge deal. My DD (6) wanted a sip of wine one night as I was pouring it. I gave her less than a drop on her tounge. She thought it was horrible, as I knew she would. I think in the US, there is a huge taboo about alcohol until you're 21 that's not present in Europe. There seems to be a much more realistic approach to alcohol education in Europe than in the US. I think there's nothing wrong with having one glass of wine or beverage with a meal. It's the no holds barred, drink until you're drunk or pass out mindset that is the issue. It's such a forbidden, illicit act to drink (at all) underage that it makes it almsost irresistable. When there's a looser, it's OK to have a drink (one) with a meal if you're responsible approach I think the actual act of drinking loses it's appeal. I mean, if you can have a glass of wine with Mom and Dad at dinner, is it as cool as "sneaking" it later with friends?
And I totally don't agree that an 18 year old can enlist, serve our country, and give the ultimate sacrifice but can't walk into a restautant, bar, wherever and buy a beer
But if it bothers you that bad, bring it up later in a non confrontational way. Especially if you don't want your kids offered a non alcoholic beverage in an adult glass. But keep in mind, if you single your kids out thy may get upset and not understand why they can't have a drink like cousin Jimmy and Jane.
Well, I would do what you did and would have minded my own business.
I say you might want to mention to them that it is against the law to contribute to minors and for them to be careful about who is around when they do that.
With that being said I was raised in the South and am a little country if ya know what I mean. I was offered drinks all the time growing up. I also joined the military and drank on base before I was 21. But am not an alcoholic and have maybe a margarita or 2 a month if that. I do not have kids yet but hopefully real soon and will be very careful of what I do with them. I believe it is how you are raised and what was shown to you as a child that affects your adult life.
Hey OP please don't feel bad. I, too, think it was uncalled for. This was not a sip of wine at Thanksgiving this was a dad trying to get hid DD to enjoy a drink. He offered..she did not ask...she declined...he pushed until she drank it. My inlaws thought is was so cute to gives their kids beer to try and sips of hard alcohol. They made virgin versions of the exact same drink the adults were drinking (OJ was called a virgin screwdriver). Eventually this led to all of the boys allowed to drink at age 15ish. (They are going to do it anyway so better they do it in my home). All the kids have drinking problems. My DH doesn't drink at all now because he knows he can't.
I think all these posters saying its no big deal are wrong! A parent encouraging a child is morally wrong and illegal. Is there anything you can do? Probably not but I would avoid them and I sure wouldn't let my kids around them!
"Morally wrong" How so?
Please do not tell my 15 YO DD this! We live in WI.
Actually, most establishments (if not all) in WI will not put their liquor licenses at risk by allowing a parent to let a minor have alcohol.
This really applies to "at home" situations.
eh I see no big deal with it either.. growing up me and my brother were always allowed a lil bit of wine on my birthday (dec 31) and we never really drank it.. just walked around with this tiny cup of wine all night for the most part pretending to be grown up. To this day I hate wine.. We dont hide our drinks from our kids.. none have asked to taste it, mostly beer. They do ask to smell it..
If you were hosting the party or if the party is on your property, then you have every right to speak up. If not, then I would keep my mouth shut.
I agree that giving her whiskey, when she clearly did not want it, was wrong and sent her the wrong message. What will happen when a peer offers it to her....she probably will think she can't say no, especially if she can't say no to her father.
As you see we all have our own opinion on whether this could harm a child now or in the future. At the very least the moral issue could be that it is illegal but you are showing them it is ok to break the law. It does not matter if someone doesn't think that it should be a law or if it is only an American law the fact is that it is against the law.
I was going to ask the same thing.
Only 14 states and the District of Colombia have outright bans on underage alchhol consumption. In 17 states, there are no minor consumption laws in private homes. In 19 states, there are specific situations in which minor consumption is allowed, usually limited to when the alcohol is served by the child's legal guardian.
Regardless, America's idiotic alcohol rules are why underage drinking is a problem.
I completly agree about the laws. In Portugal you don't see the drinking and driving, the binge drinking and the violence you see here because of drinking.
I have to agree with this.
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