OT: Wedding Gifts, how much?

[AlwaysEeyore]

We are invited to three weddings this year

1) DH's Cousin in Northern Jersey, DH & I are attending

2) My Ex-Coworker on Long Island (who I speak to once a month through e-mail) DH & I are attending

3) My Cousin on a cruise to St. Martin, (we were attending & DD was to be the flowergirl until we figured it would be close to $6000 to go)

I don't know what is an approriate gift to give for these 3 different weddings. I usually give cash since it is easier.

Any suggestions?

Thanks!!

 

[monorailsilver]

I'd say around $100-$150, maybe $200 depending how close you are to them.

Less for the wedding you aren't attending, more for the wedding you are attending & family.

The last wedding I went to was my sisters & I gave $250, more if I had it but I didn't.

The last friends wedding I went to was in 2002 & I think we gave a gift because they gave us one, prior to that I think I gave $150 in 1998 or 1999 to a friend.

And my dh went to a wedding stag in 2003 (I watched our 2 1/2 yo & 6 week old) & I think we gave around $100.

OH & I live in southern CT, near the CT River/southern Middlesex county but a few of the weddings were in Fairfield County, CT where I grew up.

 

[flipflop]

We live in NJ and generally give $200 for weddings we attend together. If one of us goes it alone, then $100. We adjust that number up for people we are really close to. We give less if we don't attend. If I spent $6000 to see someone get married, my gift would likely be less as well. With that being said, we don't give more than what we can afford.

 

[mickey&minniealways]

Usually you want to cover what you think covers the cost per person attending. Alittle more if it is family or you are close. As for the cruise I would say a maybe $200 if you can swing it. Oherwise don't sweat it.

 

[Disneychix]

If attending I tend to do $125-$150 range. If you choose not to attend the cruise I would maybe try to find a gift off the registry. Since it's your cousin and I don't know how close you are I still don't think you need to go over $150 range since you may not be attending.

 

[TDISFAMILY]

My DH and I got married in 2000 our gifts we recieved were off our registry mainly and some Aunts and Uncles gave us 100.00 or more, but close friends of the family gave in the 50.00-75.00 range. Compared to other post I may seem cheap but we tend to give 100.00 for 1st cousins and b/t 50.00-75.00 for close friends or order a gift off there registry in that range. Rember it's the though that counts.

 

[AlwaysEeyore]

Thanks for the help everyone. We will not be going on the cruise wedding but I am close to that cousin so I have to figure out what to give her. Plus her sister just got married In Disney World and we went and only gave her $100 since the trip cost us so much. I have some guilt issues with not going to her wedding but 2 weeks in Disney cost half what her cruise will cost me.

Thanks again!

 

[hoosiergirl7]

I'm originally from the Midwest and moving back there in a few years. For us we give gifts of $100 or so for family and $50 for friends. More if they're really good friends. I know things are more expensive in NY and the rest of the East Coast so I'm sure it's customary to give more.

The most I remember receiving when we got married in 1997 was $200 from my dad's best friend who lives in Sweden. We mostly received $100 from family. Less from friends. We did get a lot from our registry. We also got a fair amount of things that weren't on our registry (grrr...) I know the intentions were well, but we ended up returning it or selling it at a garage sale. The cheapest gift we got from one of Lane's cousins was a $20 glass set from Kmart. I'd rather have just gotten the $20 in the form of a check or cash if that's all they wanted to give.

 

[GoinToDisney]

I agree with the poster who said you should cover the cost of your meal and a little more if you are close.

 

[F1Julie]

Ditto on the last post. Your gift should equal the cost per head of each person invited/attending.

 

[Vijoge]

3) My Cousin on a cruise to St. Martin, (we were attending & DD was to be the flowergirl until we figured it would be close to $6000 to go)

Dang! That's one might expensive cruise!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I'm from LI too! I would give no less than $250 per couple but more likely $300 per couple. $300 per couple is the norm now.

 

[Gillian]

So what is the price per head at an NJ wedding? While I agree with the $200-$250 number, I'm not sure what the cost per person really has to do with it. I try not to go by that, because I'm not going to give less to a close friend throwing a brunch on a budget than I will to a relative having a fancy reception (probably paid for by the parents, which is perfectly fine).

For your cousin I'd probably give more. Since you are close but you can't go and therefore don't have to spend any money, give a little extra. Hopefully this is someone who will always be in your life.

 

[_queenie_]

It depends on their age. A couple in their early twenties needs cash/housewears more than a couple in their late thirties (recently went to a wedding of each). I typically give cash, I'm in New England and most people around here tend to give actual gifts, but when I got married I remember cash being the best gift of all (that was already 25 years ago, ). I'd say more for the cousin, but to in general stay under $200 (I guess I'm cheap).

 

[jazzmine]

Weddings in N. Jersey usually cost about $100 per head. Sometimes more depending on the location. We usually give $200-$300 depending on the location, couple, and relationship we have with them. Hope that helps a bit - I know how expensive things can get with weddings. We had quite a few in the past couple of years. Now the weddings are slowing down a bit and the baby showers are starting up!

 

[JacobsMommy11002]

Wow! I can't imagine giving that much for a wedding gift...even for my sister! I would spend $50-$75 on a friend, probably $75-$100 on family. Definately not more than that. Its just not the norm here...

 

[cookies]

Weddings is central and north Jersey, on a Sat. night, run between $125 - $200 per head. Friday and Sundays are about 25 - 50 less. Most weddings we got to (in Jersey and Brooklyn) we give $300, and family is $500. My husband and I are sooooo happy that everyone is married! Now, we have the Christening to go to!

 

[KristinAnne]

I just got married last summer and the gifts were pretty much between $100-$200. I think it depends on how close you are with people. I think $200 might be closer to what people give now, but if you aren't all that close with some of them, $100-$150 is perfectly fine. Frankly, as a newlywed...ANYTHING is greatly appreciated!

 

[luvmy3]

I give $100 for close friends/relatives and $50 for not so close. There is no way I would give $200 or more as a gift.
If I had to incur travel expenses like gas, or airfare and hotel accomodations I might be inclined to give less.
If I was getting married today I certainly wouldn't expect
anyone to give that much to me.

 

[kandb]

In the metro NY/NJ area, I think $200 is now the minimum to give at a wedding. A lot of people probably give $250 to $300. Personally, (since you asked), I think giving a couple $100 who got married in Disney was very low. Even though you had to travel there, I'm sure they paid more then $50 a head for you to be there. I don't think you should have taken into consideration traveling there. If you could not of afforded it, you should of not gone and sent a gift. (Just my opinion). Linda