OT: Vent re Non-Dis'r

[Marionnette]

Just an observation not aimed at anyone in particular, but it seems as if a lot of people, who are annoyed with family and co-workers making judgements about how they spend their money on Disney, are doing the same thing about the way others choose to spend their money as well. You shouldn't be upset with someone who remarks on your multiple Disney trips when you keep a running tab on the number of <insert expensive purchase here> that they buy.

 

[alc571]

Just an observation not aimed at anyone in particular, but it seems as if a lot of people, who are annoyed with family and co-workers making judgements about how they spend their money on Disney, are doing the same thing about the way others choose to spend their money as well. You shouldn't be upset with someone who remarks on your multiple Disney trips when you keep a running tab on the number of <insert expensive purchase here> that they buy.

I'm not sure that's exactly what's happening. I think everyone is just giving examples of how those who are criticizing us for spending money on Disney, are spending money on things we wouldn't necessarily see as a priority. The difference is that those we are complaining about voice their opinion and we do not. I don't care if others judge my going to Disney - just don't make *****y comments to me about it. Keep it to yourself, is all I'm saying. I don't put down things she is excited about, so what gives her the right to put down my vacation choices.

 

[momofmaz]

I'm by no means a hater but sometimes, and it comes from nowhere but nasty ugly jealousy, wonder the same thing about people. I WOULD never be rude or even comment about it but I do wonder how people manage to go so often. I will not put things on credit card unless it is a pay off in 6 months deal interest free and it gets paid. I've never been...finally going in November. I've been putting back 350 dollars every paycheck just for it! Ignore her like I said its just jealousy.

 

[crisi]

I tend to not talk about our Disney plans to too many people outside of my best friends for this reason.

We don't either. Nor about other trips we take or anything else we spend money on.

 

[Nancyg56]

Just an observation not aimed at anyone in particular, but it seems as if a lot of people, who are annoyed with family and co-workers making judgements about how they spend their money on Disney, are doing the same thing about the way others choose to spend their money as well. You shouldn't be upset with someone who remarks on your multiple Disney trips when you keep a running tab on the number of <insert expensive purchase here> that they buy.

I think that the difference is that we all have prioritized our spending, right down to how we vacation. I don't care how someone spends, but don't tell me I am lucky if I can vacation in WDW more than once. Luck has nothing to do with it. Luck is winning a lottery, not making specific choices where to allocate our money. I never would tell someone that, but I do get angry that person spends every last penny eating out, smoking two packs a day, and buying new vehicles every two years, and then questions my spending habits. What most people here are saying is that the people who have been criticizing vacation habits may be the same folks whose spending is questionable to us, but we have chosen to keep that observation to ourselves.

I'm by no means a hater but sometimes, and it comes from nowhere but nasty ugly jealousy, wonder the same thing about people. I WOULD never be rude or even comment about it but I do wonder how people manage to go so often. I will not put things on credit card unless it is a pay off in 6 months deal interest free and it gets paid. I've never been...finally going in November. I've been putting back 350 dollars every paycheck just for it! Ignore her like I said its just jealousy.

WE cannot go as often as I would like but when given a choice between a new vehicle, or furniture, or a vacation, vacation wins every time. I think it is the total package that a family considers when making those choices, and if they place every discretionary dollar towards a vacation rather that something else, that is how. I have friends who seldom vacation. I mean a few days maybe, every several years. For their family, a "vacation" is not a priority because they spend their vacation money to enjoy the lake. Every weekends, and several night a week in the simmer months, they are out on the lake in one of their boats, or jetskis. They hear about it all of the time from some of their family members, but this is how they roll. My friend was so mad when someone questioned how they have two boats, and several "toys" for their son. She knows how they choose to spend and after 3 or 4 meals out a week, they are out of grocery money, never mind anything else. The criticizer has taken two trips just this winter, but is behind on their mortgage. You just don't know, I guess.

 

[RedHeadedFairy]

Just an observation not aimed at anyone in particular, but it seems as if a lot of people, who are annoyed with family and co-workers making judgements about how they spend their money on Disney, are doing the same thing about the way others choose to spend their money as well. You shouldn't be upset with someone who remarks on your multiple Disney trips when you keep a running tab on the number of <insert expensive purchase here> that they buy.

I disagree because I don't snark at others every time they spend money, lament that I *can't* have whatever it is they've got & I don't track what they spend.... but some things are obvious in the way a person displays their lifestyle. It's also not judgement when it's a fact. If someone eats out multiple times per week, smokes a couple of packs of cigarettes a day (& my DH is in this category so I'm not throwing stones), always has the newest, biggest tech toy... odds are that they CAN make changes in their spending that would afford them the same vacations that we take.

All I was pointing out is that we all make choices every day about how we spend our money & that people notice when we do something big like Disney but they don't notice the scrimping, saving & budgeting that helps make that happen. We all spend money based on the priorities in our lives & mine happens to put a lot of focus on vacations & fun time.

 

[Greta]

We haven't been as a family since 2010 (had a quickie weekend with just me and DH in 2011 for his 40th bday) I still hear it from others "you're going there again!?, it's so expensive!" I just smile and say that we have good times there and it's worth it to us.

I say let the naysayers believe that WDW is unaffordable, less people to stand in line behind

 

[redmomof4]

I say let the naysayers believe that WDW is unaffordable, less people to stand in line behind

Amen to that!

 

[redmomof4]

My brothers were recently arguing through FB (of all places) about a large family trip we are leaving for next week. Here was my post to them...(I thought it was very timely to this discussion, and if you have a good relationship with your office mate, feel free to print it off and share it with her. Maybe it will put it into perspective for her). But it is also true that some people absolutely just cannot afford Disney, its not a cheap vacation by any means.

"alright, everyone kiss and make up. We will have fun! The younger kids wont remember everything but they will remember wonderful family time spent with cousins that they don't get to see as often and some of the magical moments at WDW. Belle still talks about some things that happened when she was dressed as Tink or when she took Bitty with her on the cruise when she was 3. Plus its not just for the kids, its for the adults too. I still enjoy Disney as an adult. And how fun for mom and Dad to have all their kids/grandkids there!

I look at it like this... We all prioritize our spending differently. Some want to go to Disney or other vacations often, let their kids play outrageously expensive AAU basketball or buy expensive purses, some want to buy lots of collectible items, have two new cars or go to baseball games often, and some want to buy campers or guns or $12 kids meals at Panera. Make sense? We all choose how we spend our money, just like our time.

In comparison, What do you think of people who say they don't have time to work out? I think its an excuse, we all have 24 hours in a day. The real reason is that working out is not a priority for them, they would rather...watch tv, sleep, clean house, go to a child's sporting event, etc...Its about priorities. Its the same with money, its hard to hear someone say, "I don't have the money to do this or that..." when you think it should be a priority. You instead want them to say to themselves, "This or that isn't a priority of how I want to spend MY money" and no one else should have any say in how they (or me or you) spend money that we earn, its no one else's business. We are all adults and we chose our priorities and how we spend both our money and time. Lets all remember that. Love you all, hate to see silly arguments and can't wait to see you in a week or so!!"

 

[JKSWonder]

I get this from my family sometimes. "You're going there AGAIN?", "Isn't that expensive?" "Didn't you just come back from vacation?"

1) Yep, we are going there again. The kids love it. They are happy there. When they are happy, I am happy. Its a vacation I know we will all enjoy. I am a seasoned WDW planner now, so planning a WDW vacation is easy for me.

2) Yes, it does cost money, but its probably not as expensive as they think it is. We go off times, we budget carefully and I look for pin codes, travel agent deals and WDW direct discounts. I have never paid full price to go WDW. I am able to pay the vacation in cash because I claim single zero on my taxes and always get a nice refund at the end of the year...this refund pays for our yearly vacation. I find its the best way for me to save.

3) No, I didn't just get back from vacation. That was last year. Yes, we go away once a year, every year. Something I hope continues forever or at least until my kids get sick of us.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

WOW!
Well why do you keep telling her what you're doing? If shes a jerk, ignore her? Shes not paying for your vacation so there is no need to fill her in. If she ask you were you're going just say, "We haven't decided yet" and let that be that. It's your child, your money you don't have to justify it to her. Tell her to mind her business and move on. Dont fuel the fire.

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

It's hard to be critical of others finances,..or it should be. Everyone has different priorities! And ways of paying for them. My sil got snarky that we are going back (only 4 days at AoA) and claims they could NEVER go to WDW. Well the same person spends 4k to send her kids to camp even though both she and her husband are off work most of the week, gets her hair colored at 150 a pop, always has nails and toes done, they have 3 cars, she has $200 flip flops. I don't argue but they could totally go if they wanted to, or if they wanted to save. We go without any of that, and this time my mom paid for it and we will pay her back on a relaxed schedule. The thing is your coworker is probably jealous! Kind of stinks not being given the benefit of the doubt..that you are a responsible adult making a choice and the right choice for your family. But it's her loss, she's the one who sounds unhappy!

But that sounds more like she doesn't want to, not can't afford it. And to be fair. She can wear the flip flops and drive the car longer than any Disney vacation. BUT thats how she chooses to spend her money. I get by weekly mani/pedis and go to Disney too. Its just about priorities.

This doesn't sound like jealousy just judgment. It could be easily said that your list above sounds like you are jealous of your sil ability to buy and do things you "go without" but its choices.

 

[ammag]

Hey...so I am not jealouslf her because she lives way beyond her means, we have the same income exactly actually. B she claims poverty at every turn and openly judges people, including us. I have yet ever ever said a thing to her about money or even in defense of myself. B when you have someone claiming abject poverty, taking money gifts from family and basically being a leech, then show up with expensive things, it gets old and eventually people notice. I didn't actually notice the shoes, a friend did . We are going on the trip, I have never said a word except to invite them. And of course it sounds like a running tally, that's what it was for the purpose of this topic. If you go around lying about your poverty and taking money for frivolous things, then turn around and get nasty with a family member over money that's an issue. And we've never taken money from the family, I would only do that if it was an actual dire need. All of that doesn't really matter, but yes I was making. A list to prove a point, when I started to think of it a bunch f things came ot mind. Nothing wrong with that I don't sit around coveting her plastic shoes lol.

 

[ammag]

And yes she wants to, or at least that's the sad story she tells everyone. They went for 3 days 2 years ago and lived it, but continues to say she could never go, it's just for attention

 

[Queen2PrincessG]

She can clearly afford it but doesn't want to pay for it out of her own pocket, at least that's what it sounds like to me.

 

[jbuey22]

First, this is her business why?? Second, can I not spend my money how I want to? Yes.. taking three trips in 12 months is a bit much. However, we have taken a total of 4 trips (including the upcoming DL one) since 2004! My son doesn't play sports (other than the church soccer fun league) and doesn't really have any expensive tastes (unless you count Lego! ) so it's not like we're spending money on hockey, etc.

I'm just so upset. How do you respond to these negative nellies?

Thanks for letting me vent. I know you'll all understand!

Well I run into the same problem at my place of work. So much so that I hear comments when I am talking to somebody on the phone about my trip.

And yes I am real short of money and struggle to pay for vacations every time and usually are paying them off until the next one is planned. I just ignore them.

Oh BTW your son is a huge Lego fan then I assume you have taken him DTD to the Lego store correct!!

If you havent you must. My kids are much older now but we still go every trip to Orlando. We have never neen to Disneyland Please let us know how it compares to Disney World.

Thanks

 

[North of Mouse]

OP, what you do/don't do as a family is your business only. My dh learned early on (I never had the issue - have always been a SAHM) not to discuss personal/family plans with his co workers. We are a relatively 'private' family and other than some general conversations about our vacations we don't give out a lot of information - takes care of the remarks from busy bodies that think they know more about what you should do, than you.

 

[alc571]

Oh BTW your son is a huge Lego fan then I assume you have taken him DTD to the Lego store correct!!

If you havent you must. My kids are much older now but we still go every trip to Orlando. We have never neen to Disneyland Please let us know how it compares to Disney World.

Thanks

We stay at POR at WDW, and take almost daily boat rides to DTD to "look" at the Lego! We went for his birthday last year, and spent all his birthday money there. So much so that DH had to leave his tshirts behind because we were doing only carryon and the Lego wouldn't fit! Haha

I'm just glad DS has no clue about Legoland in CA! He would have a fit if he knew about it and we didn't go.

 

[deuceswild10]

Ignore her and get away from her if you can. You life. Your money. Your business. Just be happy.